My Formal Night Experience...Again

[teacherman]

In September, I cruised on the Volendam to Alaska. I wrote about my formal night experience where I was denied entry because I was not dressed appropriately. Having "learned my lesson", and enjoyed reading so many of your comments, I thought I would bring you up to date on my Zuiderdam experience last week. I wore slacks, dress shirt, and tie, which seemed to be in the "suggested" dress. Upon approaching the dining room, there were signs taped to the hallway walls saying that it was Formal Night, and men were required to wear "coats and shirt with tie". Oh well, I thought, here we go again. But, without any hesitation, we were seated on all three formal nights, and enjoyed great table mates and conversation. I would estimate that about 25% of men wore tuxes, most wore suits or sport coats, and some wore simple shirt and tie. There were a few in coats with open neck shirts, and some in sport shirt with no coat. But all were accepted and seemed to enjoy the evening. HOWEVER, on the first cruise evening, as we waited in line, there were 4 "experienced" HAL female cruisers waiting in front of us, and in front of them, was a nicely dressed woman and her husband who had on shorts and a tee shirt (HOW COULD HE???). When he was told he could not enter the dining room in shorts, he asked to speak to a supervisor, and nicely explained that his suitcase had not yet arrived and these were the only clothes that he had. They were then allowed into the dining room, where upon the 4 "experienced" cruisers openly berated the matre'd for allowing them to enter, as they should know the rules. Come on, get a life. What does his situation have to do with your enjoying your dinner??? Not looking to cause trouble, here, but simply bring you up to date on my experience. Hope each of you enjoy your Thanksgiving dinner, no matter how your family chooses to dress for it.

[RuthC]

What a shame that HAL can't decide on a standard of dress, then stick with it.

[iancal]

Some people are just mean. Fortunately, the vast majority are not and one does not encounter the mean ones too often.

[Deon.Newmankgyxc]

can you post more experience

[AZNative2000]

a nicely dressed woman and her husband who had on shorts and a tee shirt (HOW COULD HE???). When he was told he could not enter the dining room in shorts, he asked to speak to a supervisor, and nicely explained that his suitcase had not yet arrived and these were the only clothes that he had.

Yikes! This man was having a much bigger problem than formal night. Day three of his 10-day cruise and no clothes and no suitcase?:eek: Might have been time to do some onboard shopping. Hope he had baggage insurance.

[cruisinjudy]

No I believe OP stated that it was the first evening. This does happen at times that luggage doesn't arrive in the cabin in time for first seating. They doneed to have some allowance for this on the first night.

[doublebzz]

No I believe OP stated that it was the first evening. This does happen at times that luggage doesn't arrive in the cabin in time for first seating. They doneed to have some allowance for this on the first night.

Well, he could have borrowed a tie to wear over his t-shirt.

[ab0si]

Well, he could have borrowed a tie to wear over his t-shirt.

According to Emily Post (revised edition), a tie is NOT appropriate with a t-shirt and shorts. The proper neckwear is an ascot.

I assumed everyone knew that.

Happy Thanksgiving

[Boytjie]

In September, I cruised on the Volendam to Alaska. I wrote about my formal night experience where I was denied entry because I was not dressed appropriately. Having "learned my lesson"...

I wore slacks, dress shirt, and tie, which seemed to be in the "suggested" dress.

One would think the lesson learned would have included the wearing of a jacket on formal night. :rolleyes:

[AZNative2000]

In September, I cruised on the Volendam to Alaska. I wrote about my formal night experience where I was denied entry because I was not dressed appropriately. Having "learned my lesson", and enjoyed reading so many of your comments, I thought I would bring you up to date on my Zuiderdam experience last week. I wore slacks, dress shirt, and tie, which seemed to be in the "suggested" dress. Upon approaching the dining room, there were signs taped to the hallway walls saying that it was Formal Night,

No I believe OP stated that it was the first evening. This does happen at times that luggage doesn't arrive in the cabin in time for first seating. They doneed to have some allowance for this on the first night.

I was on the same cruise as teacherman and our first formal night was the third night.

[lorekauf]

No I believe OP stated that it was the first evening. This does happen at times that luggage doesn't arrive in the cabin in time for first seating. They doneed to have some allowance for this on the first night.
I've never been on a cruise where formal night was the first night.

[jena1]

DH and I were on a cruise aboard the Eurodam last year and one of our tablemates had to come to the 1st formal night with a sports shirt, no tie or coat. One of his suitcases was lost and there was nothing he could do. When we got to one of the islands he bought a couple of things and looked fine. He was very apologetic and yes, he had insurance so I hope he collected what was due to him.

[RuthC]

I've never been on a cruise where formal night was the first night.
I read the post the same way you did, until Judy's post sent me back to reread it. I think her interpretation is right.

The op has mixed up his chain of events, but it appears he is talking about three separate events, in a disjointed order. He speaks of the formal night on a prior cruise, a formal night on this cruise, and the first night on this cruise.
It's because he has the second two events out of chronological order, and without separation in his typing, that they appear to be one event.
Reread it, and see if you don't see it that way, too.

[lorekauf]

I read the post the same way you did, until Judy's post sent me back to reread it. I think her interpretation is right.

The op has mixed up his chain of events, but it appears he is talking about three separate events, in a disjointed order. He speaks of the formal night on a prior cruise, a formal night on this cruise, and the first night on this cruise.
It's because he has the second two events out of chronological order, and without separation in his typing, that they appear to be one event.
Reread it, and see if you don't see it that way, too.
I'll take your word for it. My brain is scambled from our recent deep freeze weather and too many long work weeks. This thread seems a little strange to me. Do almost the same thing...and expect a different result....ok. Thanks for the explanation.

[cruisinjudy]

Thanks, Ruth.

[vbmom87]

can you post more experience

lol!!!

[solocanadian]

What a shame that HAL can't decide on a standard of dress, then stick with it.

I'm with you Ruth. Why can't the pax follow the code or eat at the Lido or Canaletto!

[djhsolara]

I'm with you Ruth. Why can't the pax follow the code or eat at the Lido or Canaletto!


I would say that I would typically agree with this statement, however if your luggage has not arrived and it is not your fault then there need to be accommodations make. A cruiser should not be denied dining in the MDR due to circumstances beyond their control.

[NYCruiserJ]

Is there a formal night on a 4 day cruise and if so how many? Are there places to eat where you don't have to dress in formal wear?

[mariner]

Ive been on cruises where a pax luggage was lost and the crew managed to get a tux for the first formal night. Somewhat suspicious if there's not a hiden agenda here.

[the2ofus]

I have been on more than one cruise when someone's luggage is either lost or delayed. More often than not, these people are treated with kindness, not derision by fellow pax. I would think that the maitre'd would have the name and cabin number of such folks, so that a brief explanation at the dining room would be all that was necessary. Where there is a delay in reaching the first port where luggage would catch up, these pax are usually offered use of rental formal clothing, and sometimes other pax come to their aid with offers of clothing.

[RuthC]

Are there places to eat where you don't have to dress in formal wear?
Always.
There's room service, and you can even order off the dining room menu. There's also the Lido, which has the same menu as the dining room. Now there's a third option, too. The Canaletto Italian restaurant has been carved out of a portion of the Lido, so is also a more casual dress restaurant.

[Boytjie]

I would say that I would typically agree with this statement, however if your luggage has not arrived and it is not your fault then there need to be accommodations make. A cruiser should not be denied dining in the MDR due to circumstances beyond their control.

Ive been on cruises where a pax luggage was lost and the crew managed to get a tux for the first formal night. Somewhat suspicious if there's not a hiden agenda here.

I think lost luggage is a valid excuse, I just wonder how many people use the excuse even if they don't qualify! :)

[iancal]

Not sure why some people are so mean spirited these days. It is never very nice to loose you luggage for a day, a few days, or forever. What's wrong with giving a person a break in these circumstances???? My first thought would never be one of suspicion, it would be empathy and I would be feeling very fortunate that it did not happen to us. We would gladly have them at our table in the MRD.....notwithstanding if it was a 'regular' night or a formal night in the MDR. Not everyone is going through life looking for all the 'angles' as it were so why even assume it.

[casamariposa]

I agree wholeheartedly with Ruth. HAL must deal consistently with these issues. If HAL wants to state in its brochures that informality reigns on the shorter cruises fine. But they must be consistent in turning passengers away from the MDR.

[vbmom87]

I agree wholeheartedly with Ruth. HAL must deal consistently with these issues. If HAL wants to state in its brochures that informality reigns on the shorter cruises fine. But they must be consistent in turning passengers away from the MDR.

I, too, agree. However, HAL obviously doesn't. My TA told us on her HAL ALaska cruise men were allowed in the dining room on formal night in polos and dockers. On our ship you would be turned away if you came to the dining room dressed like that. Yes, consistency would be great. It seems simple, but apparantly HAL can't figure it out.

[Jalex63]

I am new to posting on this forum, but not new to cruising. Personally, after years of carting formal clothes to and from cuise ships, my wife and I have had enough. Life in general is getting more informal and it seems that the cruise ships are about the last hold-outs. BUT, that is fine with us, we remember the days when dressing for dinner was fun, but not for us anymore. So, we pack no formal clothes what-so-ever for cruises and simply enjoy the lido and avoid the lower decks on formal nights.

[Tredebo]

Ive been on cruises where a pax luggage was lost and the crew managed to get a tux for the first formal night. Somewhat suspicious if there's not a hiden agenda here.
Depends on whether the OP was (1) aware he could ask for assistance in this instance, and (2) whether he did ask for said assistance.

[mariner]

He would not have to ask. The crew would be aware and would go out of their way to equip him with clothes to get by until the first port when the bag usually arrives.

[ger_77]

We were in a situation where we didn't get our luggage until the end of the 3rd day (our first port of call). On formal night we didn't even consider going to the dining room, knowing full well what was the expected dress code. We went to the Lido where we had a lovely dinner outside on the back deck, enjoying another couple's company (their luggage was also lost), and making new friends.

I honestly don't think the maitre d' should have let the man in with shorts and a shirt - if there's a dress code, it should be enforced. Just my 2 cents worth.

Smooth Sailing! :):):)

[vbmom87]

if there's a dress code, it should be enforced. Just my 2 cents worth.

Smooth Sailing! :):):)

That is the problem. There is a dress code, but it is not enforced. From reading these boards for several years, I have come to the conclusion that there is no intention by HAL to make all ships conform to the dress code.

[Cruising-along]

We were in a situation where we didn't get our luggage until the end of the 3rd day (our first port of call). On formal night we didn't even consider going to the dining room, knowing full well what was the expected dress code. We went to the Lido where we had a lovely dinner outside on the back deck, enjoying another couple's company (their luggage was also lost), and making new friends.

I honestly don't think the maitre d' should have let the man in with shorts and a shirt - if there's a dress code, it should be enforced. Just my 2 cents worth.

Smooth Sailing! :):):)

We would have done the same thing, either eat in the Lido or get room service. I can only imagine how uncomfortable I would feel entering the dining room dressed like that -- on any night. So many other options, just not worth the stares and embarassment IMO. :)

[petrakae]

I actually enjoy the Formal nights as we live a quiet life as retirees, travelling north for our winter with our caravan (Travel trailer to USA), and saving for more cruises. These nights are the only times I can get my husband into a suit, (unless it is for a funeral) and it gives me a chance to 'dress-up'. Bear in mind, that hubby is a wearer of shorts in all seasons and I believe if they brought in suits with short trousers he would be first in line to buy one.:D

[lvz2cruz]

I wonder if the wording of SUGGESTED dress code makes people feel they do not have to follow. If it said REQUIRED dress code, there would be no leeway--dress like this or do not try to enter the MDR.

I do think exceptions should be made when your luggage is lost. Some people see the dining experience as a huge part of the cruise experience and should not be penalized when they pack appropriate clothes that are delayed or lost. The people who have no respect for rules have ruined it for those who do.

[surfergirle]

On our OCT 30 sailing of the Eurodam, we met an older couple who LOST EVERYTHING. It had been left at the port. HAL gave them $150 SBC on the 4th day, when they finally admitted it had been left, because they had not found it yet. They only had thier small carry on with meds etc.
They should have found them some formalwear, but didnt. What a shame. Dining is a major part of cruising. If my luggage was lost, I would make them feed me in Tamarind & Canaletto every night! :)

[Randyk47]

I understand there are circumstance where luggage doesn't show up, etc., etc., and certainly accommodations can and should be made for those circumstances. That said I really throw this whole appropriate wear thing back on HAL. Stop waffling HAL! Set the standard. Explain the standard. If necessary highlight the standard. Enforce the standard. Period.

[RedmondCruiser]

Just returned from a 20 day collectors voyage on the Noordam. We had 6 formal nights.

1. The tux is dead. There were very few tuxes on the ship. Normally you see more on a Caribbean cruise than an Alaska cruise. In July we were on the Rotterdam and you could count the tuxes on one hand (exageration - but you get the point)

2. Saw no shorts in the main dining room. But we did see a fellow with a tee shirt on formal night. Also many men with open collars and no tie ( same as the old semi-formal nights) The big factor in the death of the tux was the luggage and weight limits imposed by the airline.

I had always enjoyed formal night and own two tuxes and one dinner jacket. Possibly I could have a ceremonial cremation on the front lawn ?

Suprised not to hear the Rev chime in on this subject ?

[Boytjie]

Has $25 for an extra bag really killed the tux? :confused:

I find it funny that people will hundreds or thousands of dollars on a cruise vacation and then claim that they just cannot pay $25 more for another piece of luggage.

On our most recent cruise in Hawaii (formal night optional on NCLA we didn't pack tuxes). I guess we could have skimped on clothing, worn the same stuff more often and gotten it all in one suitcase each, but the $50 we paid for an extra bag round trip did not deter me - we checked three bags and paid for one of them. $50... about what we each paid to see the USS Bowfin and USS Missouri, or a couple of rounds of Mai Tais. It's vacation...

[Randyk47]

[quote=Boytjie;27050211]Has $25 for an extra bag really killed the tux? :confused:

I find it funny that people will hundreds or thousands of dollars on a cruise vacation and then claim that they just cannot pay $25 more for another piece of luggage.
quote]

Actually had the same thought. I know I'll be taking my tux and white dinner jacket in March. If it were to mean, and I'm certain it won't, that I had to take an additional bag then I would. It's important to us and worth the money.

[lorekauf]

Has $25 for an extra bag really killed the tux? :confused:

I find it funny that people will hundreds or thousands of dollars on a cruise vacation and then claim that they just cannot pay $25 more for another piece of luggage.

On our most recent cruise in Hawaii (formal night optional on NCLA we didn't pack tuxes). I guess we could have skimped on clothing, worn the same stuff more often and gotten it all in one suitcase each, but the $50 we paid for an extra bag round trip did not deter me - we checked three bags and paid for one of them. $50... about what we each paid to see the USS Bowfin and USS Missouri, or a couple of rounds of Mai Tais. It's vacation...
No, that's just a BS excuse IMO not to dress. I'll take as many clothes as I deem required. I have to laugh, I remember people asking if they could put Xmas lights on their balcony. I bet they weren't worried about the weight of those puppies:D.

[kazu]

I have really mixed feelings on this one. I know if our luggage was missing no way would dh go into the dining room in shorts (but he doesn't wear shorts on the plane, anyways). He also hates renting things. He likes his own clothes.

However, if the suitcase was truly lost, I don't think the passenger should be chastized. If he has the nerve to walk into the dining room in shorts, more power to him. who knows if HAL offered him an outfit or not or if it fit or if they had his size?

i have been to formal nights and seen one pile of tuxes and other cruises where people wore sequined jean outfits (not my idea of formal attire).

The point has been made. It's not consistent. We dress appropriately and while we might chuckle at a couple of people that don't (the jean type - please don't flame me), we don't worry about other people are wearing (unless i see a dress I wish I had)

[Boytjie]

No, that's just a BS excuse IMO not to dress. I'll take as many clothes as I deem required. I have to laugh, I remember people asking if they could put Xmas lights on their balcony. I bet they weren't worried about the weight of those puppies:D.


So true! Or the weight of blenders and irons ;)

So people would gladly pay for specialty dining but not an extra suit case?

[Floridiana]

So true! Or the weight of blenders and irons ;)

So people would gladly pay for specialty dining but not an extra suit case?

They may not be the same people. An extra suitcase may be a hassle not just an expense.

When I read these fashion police comments, I feel like I am going to be on the wrong ship.

[Lady Chew]

I think it's perfectly understandable that people get to a certain point in their vacation planning and say "nope, not worth another $25" for whatever it is they want to do, including carrying formal wear.

Mr Chew will be wearing a nice blazer, nice slacks, dress shirt & tie for formal night. That way he doesn't have to carry his good shoes ... which are 13 1/2 and weigh several pounds.

If we really, really wanted to go all out ... we would happily pay for the extra luggage. Although come to think of it, our cruise in January is two weeks, plus 5 days before & after, so we'll probably need an extra suitcase anyway!! But still not bringing the formal formalwear. We'll be happy in our Smart Casual and I bet we won't raise an eyebrow in the MDR.

We just don't think that "formal" on a cruise means the same thing as "formal" at the White House or other galas. Perhaps if they had other special events requiring formalwear on the ship besides dinner, it might have more meaning. But just to wander around the ship, go to a show or to the casino ... for the "atmosphere" ... not worth the effort. For us, anyway. There's plenty of room for everyone!

[suse]

Yikes! This man was having a much bigger problem than formal night. Day three of his 10-day cruise and no clothes and no suitcase?:eek: Might have been time to do some onboard shopping. Hope he had baggage insurance.
Just a suggestion for HAL. Maybe it would be prudent to sell underwear onboard for these situations. Imagine going days without clean tidy whites. How bleak.