Goody Bag for Cabin Steward

[SeaYa52]

A few years ago I read an idea on CCBoards to bring a goody bag for our cabin steward. I did this and though it was a nice touch. In the goody bag were some things from my city-for example - a NFL t-shirt, a magnet from charlotte , pralines, and a few other small items - a phone card, stamps - excetra....I think I might have spent less than $20 on it....I think my stewad enjoyed the idea - I saw him wearing the NFL Panther shirt when he was off duty....I did not do this to receive "special" treatment - just a reverse bonvoyage gift. ( I usually give the steward an extra tip at the beginning of the cruise also) It's really nice to learn where they are from - and about their family. Thought I would pass this on.
Sandy
Charlotte

[Burnsey]

That is a wonderful idea for the room steward....I'll do that next year...Thanks

[Time2sail]

That is a wonderful suggestion and I have never thought of doing that--thanks for sharing with me, too.:)

[jaguarstyper]

This is a very cool idea. We always buy a little something for our cabin steward as an expression of our appreciation for their hard work. Sometimes its tough to decide on what to get them. On previous cruise, my wife casually asked our cabin steward if he had the time. He told her no and that he had lost his watch. In port we picked up a Timex and gave it to him on our last day. I've never seen anyone so thrilled and appreciative to receive a $25 Timex watch. It made my wife's day.

I like the idea of a "Steelers" goody bag.

Tim

[oliviaonthe beach]

GREAT idea for a random act of kindness! Speaking of NFL t-shirts, I am a long-time loyal Bengals fan. Do you think the cabin stewards know how terrible they are? Would they be insulted if I gave them one? Maybe I should pick a college team.

[HeatherInFlorida]

I love this idea!!! Thanks for suggesting it! This is the really good part about these boards. Even though I've cruised many times and after awhile start to think there's nothing else to learn, but over and over again I'll come on here and there will be another great idea.

On a scale of 1 to 10, this is a 10 ranking right up there just above the suction hooks for the bathroom!:D

[jaguarstyper]

On a scale of 1 to 10, this is a 10 ranking right up there just above the suction hooks for the bathroom!:D


Are you kidding?? Surely this is not above the advice on how to smuggle booze!!! That goes to 11. :D

Tim

[Renorita]

Great idea! As we live in Reno, we can come up with a lot of neat tourist type items. They better be Unisex though, since you don't usually know ahead of time whether your steward will be male or female.

[wieslaw]

A few years ago I read an idea on CCBoards to bring a goody bag for our cabin steward. I did this and though it was a nice touch. In the goody bag were some things from my city-for example - a NFL t-shirt, a magnet from charlotte , pralines, and a few other small items - a phone card, stamps - excetra....I think I might have spent less than $20 on it....I think my stewad enjoyed the idea - I saw him wearing the NFL Panther shirt when he was off duty....I did not do this to receive "special" treatment - just a reverse bonvoyage gift. ( I usually give the steward an extra tip at the beginning of the cruise also) It's really nice to learn where they are from - and about their family. Thought I would pass this on.
Sandy
Charlotte

Hello Sandy, it seems that you are a very nice person and so considerate about other people........but I respectfully do disagree with you.
The stewards, waiters and all the other ship's personnel have access to more things and places that you can imagine. Anything that you can buy, they can buy cheaper and better - the places that you visit on your cruise once in a while......they visit every week or two......and yes they do get time off (not every week) and have the time to enjoy the ports. They know what is good and what to buy and where to buy it. The phone cards that you will buy might not work for them.....they buy them through the ship for better price and the proper ones for the proper places. The t-shirts, might mean absolutely nothing to them......they have different interests.......and in addition where are they going to keep/store all the 'well meaning gifts' from all of the people......they have small cabins and there is two of them in a cabin.
The 'stamps' - what are they going to use them for, different ports require stamps from that particular country. Watches - planty of those in the ships stores (and they get a discount even when they run the weekly sales) or in the ports. All the 'sweet goodies' - they have them on the ship and in the ports......and they get what they like, not what you think that they like.
I am 'sorry' to disagree with you......even that you want to take a very personal approch to the 'stewards'....... I and you are nothing more to them than just a 'pay check' and 'a job'. People like me and you change every week for them - they do not get attached much to us (even that we might get attached to them and remember them as "our" steward for years.
The best thing/gift that I believe is approperiate is .....a good and kind treatment and the proper recommended by the cruise line tip.
Have you ever offered a 'goodie bag' to a steward in a hotel? They do exactly the same job.....and in many cases the steward taking care of you in a hotel in the USA, makes and takes a lot less money than the steward on the ship.

Wes

[RevNeal]

Wes,

I understand what you're saying and why you're saying it; however, please note that the "goody bag" is not instead of a monetary tip. Some of the stewards may not like it, but others may. You are correct about picking up things for them from ports -- but what about something from one's home town ... I don't know many HAL ships that visit Davisburg, MI or Dallas, TX. Giving a steward a nice t-shirt branded with one's home town is a nice gesture, it doesn't take any room to speak of, it's not "useless junk," AND it's something that a steward might give to another staff person if that person had less or little of their own (as many do early-on in their contracts). In short, such a gift is not entirely as you paint it.

I had a steward, once, who told me -- quietly -- that he was a Christian ... that's rare and among Indonesians. So, when I tipped him I included a copy of one of the books I had written along with a note in it thanking him for his wonderful service. The note was written on some of my personal stationary which had my email address on it; this resulted in him initiating an exchange of e-mails with me over a period of months in which he asked me questions of a personal and religious nature; he is a very nice young man who also feels more than somewhat isolated due to his religious choices. I tried to encourage him as much as I could, but he was not looking forward to going home at the end of contract. I've not heard from him since he went home, but pray he's well.

[sail7seas]

Renorita.....

ALL HAL cabin stewards are men.

[jhannah]

I understand what Wes is saying. A steward has no room for lots of trinkets. However, even if every one of us here on the CC board did this, we likely would be the only ones on the sailing to do it, and we would likely never do it to the same steward. The phone card is a ligitimate heads-up because truly some are worthless in some locations. But the idea of a Las Vegas t-shirt, pin or cap might just be a nice thing he would never get otherwise. (At least not until the San Andreas Fault snaps and California drifts off into the Pacific and Las Vegas becomes a port city.) Now if I really wanted to go all-out, I'd bring along a showgirl!! But I guess that would be problematic as well. Thanks for the suggestion.

[Kathy & George]

Gifts when not expected are usually enjoyed even more. Stewards are not only there for their jobs, money etc. We have made many freinds who are stewards, sommeliers, and other ship board workers that we continue to correspond with and have upon occasion even been invited to visit their home(which we did do once). You never know who you will meet and become close to on board. Isn't cruising great!

[sail7seas]

With all due respect, I do not think they want any trinkets and souvenirs and touristy 'stuff'. Even if they do not discard it before you leave the ship, which is entirely possible due to lack of storage space and cabin inspections by the Captain.....they will discard it when they travel home.

They have weight restrictions as do we. Can you imagine how few pounds they are permitted without paying for excess weight on the planes? These stewards have, in most cases, been aboard for a Year....away from home, with their basic necessary possessions they need to transport.

They cannot/would not pay excess baggage weight IMO to tote home a bunch of t-shirts. He can buy as many t-shirts as he wants when he gets home. They probably tote a few with them but not a bunch.

Money, folks. Cash. Greenbacks. That is what is most appreciated. It doesn't take up alot of room. It can get they whatever it is they want to buy....no what we choose to think they want. They want cash.

Sure...a case like the Timex watch. That was wonderful. The steward commented he didn't have one; it came up in conversation. KInd passengers took note and got him one. (We had just about the identical thing occur with us with a steward who was taking care of us for the third time. We loved Budi and knew him very well. ) In a situation like that, it's wonderful. But IMO just because you think the doo dads from your hometown/city look cutesy to us, they probably do very little for a cabin steward from Asia.

[HeatherInFlorida]

No, I wasn't thinking touristy stuff. I was thinking far more usable stuff and certainly not in lieu of a tip. Also, I was thinking a very small little bag ... even goodies.

However, after posting above I realized it could get to be a nightmare especially now that it's appearing here. Before you know it these guys are inundated with t-shirt of every shape, size and type. They could get 20 or 30 per cruise.

So I think if it were anything, it should be just a small trinket to show you thought of them before getting on the ship. Obviously the cash gift would be the same no matter what you do, but I've never known any person on the face of this earth not to be touched by the small gesture of a gift ... even if they do toss it in the end ;) .

[sail7seas]

I didn't mean to imply anyone was 'getting around tipping' by presenting a steward with a goody bag. I understood it to be in addition to tips.


We have become friends with so many of these wonderful stewards through the years and truly.....they want money.

Useful stuff??? What do we know is useful to them? Toothpaste? Unless they say what they wnat, how we would know what to get? We actually have brought back personal grooming items from days ashore but it was on special request when we inquired if anything was needed or wanted when we knew the crew person wasn't leaving the ship. They have a store where they can buy basics but sometimes what they want is not available there and they can't leave the ship.


Of course any gesture of good will is mostly taken for what it was meant to be. I'm just trying to make a point that they would be inundated beyond appreciation if we all started arriving on the ship toting little gift bags for them.

Everyone will do as they wish and I know everyone's heart is in the right place.....I'm just providing something to think about from my past experience and past conversations with soooo many of the great stewards we all think so highly of.

[ekerr19]

When I first saw this thread I wondered if anyone would comment that many of the crew do not have the room to take that much home. On our last cruise (when everyone was going home from the Noordam) I was given a nice set of glassware from one of the bartenders that he picked up in Germany, and didn't have room for - and I was also given a couple of books by another bartender who received them from a well intentioned previous cruiser.

I think it is very difficult for crew to take these types of things with them when they go home and they are often times having to leave much behind. While I think t-shirts and other little gifts are a truly generous gesture, I think you will find most crew prefer to receive gifts in the form of cash.

As one previous poster pointed out - they do have access to many of these things in their travels and while they may not have a t-shirt from your home town, it also may not mean that much to them, having never been there.

Personally, I wouldn't consider doing something like this because I believe it can also be misinterpreted by a crew member; but to those who have done so and to those considering doing so, please know that I am not passing any type of judgement here, just experessing my opinion. :)

[scopewest]

sail7seas: You mentioned your steward Budi. For all I know this is a common name but our steward on the "O" was Budi, and he was fabulous. Aside from extra cash tips which he appreciated, we wrote a great review of him on our comment card.

It's true as someone said that there's hundreds of us and only one of them so we remember our stewards. However, I worked as a court clerk and sat through hundreds of trials. I do remember the ones that made an impression on me! I'm sure the stewards will long remember an extremely kind or mean passenger. They probably swap stories about us the way we talk about them. And if you read Jeraldine Saunders book, The Love Boats, the crews not only talk, they nickname us if we really stand out!

[HeatherInFlorida]

In thinking on it, Sail, I know you are right. It just seemed like a good idea at the time. I love presents:D ... especially strangers bearing gifts.;)

[Kami's pal]

I understand the wish to make a more 'personal' gift. After all these people have cared for us in very personal ways. They've been so good at it that we look at them as personal friends. They aren't. They are only being very professional hospitality agents. The line gets very blurry when we mistake their professional actions for something else.

Money. That's what they need. That's what they want. That's what they can keep if we haven't altered our onboard accounts. I also hand over all my change at the end. I can't turn it back in at my bank, and it's a nuisance at security, so I leave the coins with a note. "Sorry to leave this here for you to dispose of, but I'll never be able to use it at home. Maybe you can find a use for it next time you're in this port. " This is NOT part of my tip!

The other important service is the comment card. I learn their names. I take note of specific actions that I really appreciate and write a note DURING the cruise to their supervisor (chief housekeeper, Maitre d') and on the comment card itself.

Asking if there is anything they need while I'm ashore shopping has only once resulted in a request, for batteries. Fortunately I was able to find the right ones and bought a bunch. He insisted on paying me and I accepted because I sensed from his insistence that he felt a bit afraid that he'd overstepped some rule.

But I confess that I do pack "goodies" too. If I do get to learn about their families and if they have small children, I pull out some trinkest that my little ones like: stickers, ink 'tattoos', tiny puzzle toys. I tell them that I appreciate what sacrifices they are making for their families and I hope that their children, nieces/nephews, small friends will enjoy the trinkets. I make certain that they are small enough to fit into a duffel, but I also know that sometimes the crew member will use it to entertain another cruiser's child. So it will make their job easier later on.

[RevNeal]

However, after posting above I realized it could get to be a nightmare especially now that it's appearing here. Before you know it these guys are inundated with t-shirt of every shape, size and type. They could get 20 or 30 per cruise.

LOL ... given how cheap some of our fellow cruisers are, I somehow doubt that will ever become a problem. Given how many people on the Oosterdam were in line to remove the automatic gratuity -- and, based upon what I heard them say amongst themselves while standing in line, they had no intention of tipping -- I seriously doubt that they planned on giving any trinkets either.

And, frankly, I wouldn't expect anyone to take home any stuff they might be given; I would gather that its for use during their time aboard ship ... during their rare off time and when they go ashore. One Filipino bartender once told me that he didn't have much in the way of civilian clothing to wear ashore and that was why he was wearing a t-shirt 3 times too large for him ... he had borrowed it from a roommate. I made sure I tipped him a little more at the end of the cruise (that was back before the auto-gratuity was instituted). Of course, I tipped in the form of cash ... not clothing.

I've often given books ... books I've read while on the cruise or extra copies of the books I've written. I don't expect anyone to keep those either ... I HOPE they get passed around. I started giving books I had with me when one Steward told me he was working on his English and wished he had more English books to read. I ended up leaving him, along with my tip, the four paperbacks I had been reading. He caught me in the hall as I was leaving and thanked me for the books.

[RevNeal]

The other important service is the comment card. I learn their names. I take note of specific actions that I really appreciate and write a note DURING the cruise to their supervisor (chief housekeeper, Maitre d') and on the comment card itself.

PRECISELY RIGHT. In addition to tips, this is among the most important things we can do for them. However, I'd hesitate from shooting people who, of themselves, give a tiny little gift of some sort. Having served as a Chaplain aboard, I know that some of the staff have little and have little room for much, but they do appreciate some small things (like the batteries, or paperback books that can be passed around, etc).

And, YES, they do have nicknames for us. :D Sometimes they're not flattering ... but then, neither are some of us. :) Other times the nicknames can be very flattering. Even though I'm protestant, there's not a cruise I go on (either as chaplain or as just a passenger) that the Filipino staff doesn't start calling me "Father."

[sail7seas]

We always leave behind books we have read but do not usually drop them at the library.


Sometimes we leave them in the Neptune Lounge or ask the concierge if she would like them.

Once, it so happened that the Captain always had his lunch outside the back of Lido above aft pool where we always sit. We were on back-to-backs and saw him daily. vv He often took note of whatever book we happened to be carrying. He commented that he had yet to read some of them and before we left the ship, I stacked the ones we were finished with, tied them with a ribbon, wrote the Captain a note and requested the Concierge have them delivered to him. I think he was pleased to receive them.

I once had stacked about 6 books we were finished with on the bureau in our cabin. The last morning the steward came in (our door was open awaiting embarkation) and asked if we were leaving them. When we answered yes, he asked if we would mind if he took them. Of course we were delighted for him to have them.

[ekerr19]

There is a big difference in helping someone when they mention a need or if they request something, like the batteries, imo.

I think it is great that you are able to provide reading materials and clothing to those that have expressed a need or desire.

We had befriended one of the waitstaff several years ago who fell in love with DH's Bronco Superbowl T-shirt... we got his addess and sent one for him along with a matching one for his young son. We always offer to send things if someone has expressed an interest or desire in acquiring something. We once sent sets of photos we had taken of the Filipino crew show to one of performers mother and grandmother on his behalf. I don't mind doing these types of things at all. I'm sure that many of you on these boards feel the same way.

I just don't like to presume that someone needs this, or wants that. It makes me a bit uncomfortable.

[sail7seas]

I agree, ekerr.

[HeatherInFlorida]

And, YES, they do have nicknames for us. :D Sometimes they're not flattering ... but then, neither are some of us. :)

I have nicknames for some of us right here;) ............

[RevNeal]

I have nicknames for some of us right here ;)............

hehehehehehe ... I can only imagine!

[trubey]

I agree with EKerr19's comments, but I think my reasoning may be diferent. The idea of buying someone small "trinkets" reeks of national chauvinism: Does every third-world person want or need what we pick up at a dollar store?

And these guys really do have lives. They get out to the ports and pick up their own necessities and souvenirs. Most of them know the ports much better than we do. I spent an afternoon in Turkey with a guy from the ship. Everything we looked at, he commented something to the effect of: "Oh, I can get for only $4.00 in Bangkok".

A present is something you buy for someone you already know. And because you either like the person or believe they will like the gift. Otherwise it's just the "Ugly American" philosophy. Remember our national joke of buying Manhattan from the Indians for a string of beads.

Susan.

[Time2sail]

[QUOTE=trubey]I agree with EKerr19's comments, but I think my reasoning may be diferent. The idea of buying someone small "trinkets" reeks of national chauvinism: Does every third-world person want or need what we pick up at a dollar store?

And these guys really do have lives. They get out to the ports and pick up their own necessities and souvenirs. Most of them know the ports much better than we do. I spent an afternoon in Turkey with a guy from the ship. Everything we looked at, he commented something to the effect of: "Oh, I can get for only $4.00 in Bangkok".

A present is something you buy for someone you already know. And because you either like the person or believe they will like the gift. Otherwise it's just the "Ugly American" philosophy. Remember our national joke of buying Manhattan from the Indians for a string of beads.


Being one-quarter Cherokee and American, I am still trying to decide how to take your last paragraph:rolleyes: But, I am sure it was offered with the kindest of intentions since the whole post was about not offending someone.:)

[trubey]

Time2sail, I'm glad you didn't just get insulted and thanks for giving me a chance to explain myself.

I used the image of the beads and the Indians as an example of how one group "thinks" they are superior to another. And as you could tell from the rest of my post, this is the opposite of my personal beliefs.

susan.

[RevNeal]

:eek: Yousa :eek:

How did we go from trying to do something nice for those who work so hard to provide excellent service to being "Ugly Americans."

I'm not pretty, but I take exception to the term "Ugly American."

[Cruise4Sunshine]

What a nice gesture! But it's true, no room in the cabin, no room in the bags home. I have one word for you, "consumables." You can share a special hot sauce from your area, candies, nuts, if he doesn't like, he can share with his friends on board. It shows pre-thought, and is a little extra touch, since HAL is now charging tips to your ship board account. Personally, I find a tip on boarding day insures you have everything you need when you need it.

[trubey]

I like to think that my fellow cruisers and ccers are not that stereotype. And we probably are not.

But unfortunately, I have seen a dramatic increase in anti-American sentiment in Europe during the last few years. I am an American, born and raised, but I've lived in Portugal for over five years.

Let's avoid any particular political discussions on these boards, but recently, I have been badly criticized, just for being an American. I can share some of these experiences if people are interested, but it probably shouldn't be in this thread.

And of course, all of this is "Just My Humble Opinion" and may really have no basis in reality. And I apologize to anyone I may have offended. Susan.

[SeaYa52]

Wow - didn't expect this type of reaction -

Oh well - I will give my room steward his goody bag - complete with a few small gifts from the Charlotte area. If he does not want them - so be it - it will still be a token of thanks (along with the extra $20 I will slip him the first day- and maybe more later if they do a really great job) Not an ugly American trying to insult anyone - just a Southern'er - sharing cause I want to - and if they don't want it - I'll never know. Hey REVNEAL - read some of your posts on another thread - you sound like a GREAT Rev - wish you were sailing with us. ( are you Lutheran by chance??)

[sail7seas]

I like to think that my fellow cruisers and ccers are not that stereotype. And we probably are not.

But unfortunately, I have seen a dramatic increase in anti-American sentiment in Europe during the last few years. I am an American, born and raised, but I've lived in Portugal for over five years.

Let's avoid any particular political discussions on these boards, but recently, I have been badly criticized, just for being an American. I can share some of these experiences if people are interested, but it probably shouldn't be in this thread.

And of course, all of this is "Just My Humble Opinion" and may really have no basis in reality. And I apologize to anyone I may have offended. Susan.


Susan....

I am interested to read some of your experiences and think it pertinent to this board as many will be cruising in Europe during the upcoming months.

We have traveled in Europe extensively and rarely have had too much Anti-Americanism but have encountered some.

Please share some of your stories with us.

Thanks if you choose to do that.

[HeatherInFlorida]

Sandy, I still think your gesture is a nice one. I also understand and agree with many of the points made here, but I don't agree that you only buy gifts for people you know. I've often bought little gifts when visiting someone I've never met before.

I honestly don't think it's necessary to know what a person needs or wants; it's a caring gesture and nothing more. It might be a box of chocolates, a basket of cookies or nuts. A small gift is a token to say "I appreciate what you're doing for me". It's a little unnerving that this thread went from your nice gesture to something I honestly don't understand.

[kryos]

When I first saw this thread I wondered if anyone would comment that many of the crew do not have the room to take that much home.
From what I understand, these crew people have very, very tight living quarters aboard the ship. They have a cabin that is very narrow ... you could literally stand in the center, spread your arms out, and almost touch the walls. Into that small space they have bunk beds and a small dresser. Two people share this cabin and this very tight space. Then they have a sink on the other side. A bathroom with tub and shower is adjacent, and is shared with two additional crew members from the nextdoor cabin. Needless to say, with such short space the crew people do not have room to store very much in their cabins, let alone pack it all up to go home.

It's a nice thought, but I'd be more inclined to save the money spent in putting the goodie bag together, and give it to the steward in the form of an extra tip. I think that would be more appreciated, and put to better use.

Just my opinion ...

Blue skies ...

--rita

[ekerr19]

Susan - Thanks for your input and observations. I do believe I understand where you are coming from.

When we are visiting someone, even if we don't know him or her - a small gift is considered a gesture of hospitality. If you think about it in the true sense, we aren't really visiting these folks nor are we "their" guests.

I think it is a lovely gesture, however I can also see where it can be misinterpreted.

Having just returned from Europe in November (U.S. Election time) I saw more anti-American sentiment than ever before. When witnessing the behavior of some of my fellow countrymen, I understand the sentiment. The elitist attitude is still very prevalent and I'm sorry to say - this gesture of hospitality; while being very generous and well intended, in some cases only reinforces the stereotype.

I have no wish to offend anyone - as I mentioned, I think it is a wonderfully generous gesture and obviously very heart felt. :)

[ROZO'SBEAU]

Very good discussion going on here about "goodies".
A couple of suggestions....consumables do work. If you come from a place that makes a special candy or cookie (a regional thing), that would make a great gift. It's something they can't get at any port.

Regarding phone cards. The cards the HAL crews use can be bought "cheaply" on board the HAL ships. Usually, a senior crew member handles the sales, like a deckhand supervisor (that's who handled it on the last cruise I was on). I think the name of the card is "CALL-ASIA" or something like that. It allows them to extend the face value of the card somehow by accessing an intermediary service. It was explained to me in broken English and I'm afraid I didn't understand it all. In any event, discretely talk to one of the ladies at the front desk and they should be able to put you in touch with the right person. A phone card (of the right type) is as good as cash to them and the thought is appreciated because it is something they all use and have to buy themselves.

Hope this adds to the discussion.
Beau

[Nliedel]

No, you do not want to load down someone with a lot of crap but we are going to be traveling with our (actually pretty well behaved) boys in the fall and a little something extra for this person would be a nice extra touch, along with an extra 2 bucks a day for putting up with the boys. A phone card? Now I can see how useful and wonderful that would be when you are far from home. I know my last cabin attendant (RCCL) mentioned that she sent most of her cash home so I suspect she does not get to call her girls as much as she liked (this came up in normal conversation about her family btw and we did not feel this was a hustle at all, she was every excited because she was heading home after that cruise).

If it is small and they can use it up on board then it would probably be something nice for them and thoughtful.

[sail7seas]

Okay, folks, call me paranoid, if you wish. (;) I've been called worse. :) )


In this day and age, I do not/would not eat anything given to me by a stranger that is not in a factory sealed container. Homemade cookies and candy and whatever are lovely gifts but we have all read horror stories of 'unwanted additives' found in a few isolated articles.

No cookie is worth to me the chance that some sicko did something awful to it.

I, personally, would deposit any edible not factory sealed given me by a stranger into the nearest waste recepticle.

[kalamari]

There is an "exhaustive" thread on the NCL website about this subject, last month.

First of all, the wages are extremely low in addition to there not being a lot of space. Think of 2-4 men packed into a sardine can. I'm not sure what it's like on the HAL ships but I can't imagine it being much different on an HAL ship. Cash always, always, always, works, and is by far more appreciated than a goody bag that they may either find tacky, uselsess, or enjoy but have no space for. Considering the wages of what most crew make, and even though it may go far in their country of origin, it always helps as so many of them are supporting family as in the case of my darling. Phone cards are not the greatest either, as there are so many stipulations on where they can be used, etc. If the crew have cash then they know where to buy the cards. So, you can never go wrong with extra money.

As he says, the best thing a passenger can do to show gratitude is to WRITE a letter to the ship company AFTER the ship has returned, and send it to the ship company. The comment cards are sometimes not read until many weeks after the voyage has returned. Letters received in the coroporate office are read quickly and it is not uncommon for that letter to be passed on to a supervisor in a matter of days. The end result is being placed in better stations in serving areas (hence, more tips, etc), or being given extra time off (most work 12-14 hour days) or in rare cases opportunties for promotions, etc. when review time comes up.

So there ya have it, straight from the horse's (and his girlfriend's) mouth. Do what is right for them, not what makes you feel good...:) Menina

From what I understand, these crew people have very, very tight living quarters aboard the ship. They have a cabin that is very narrow ... you could literally stand in the center, spread your arms out, and almost touch the walls. Into that small space they have bunk beds and a small dresser. Two people share this cabin and this very tight space. Then they have a sink on the other side. A bathroom with tub and shower is adjacent, and is shared with two additional crew members from the nextdoor cabin. Needless to say, with such short space the crew people do not have room to store very much in their cabins, let alone pack it all up to go home.

It's a nice thought, but I'd be more inclined to save the money spent in putting the goodie bag together, and give it to the steward in the form of an extra tip. I think that would be more appreciated, and put to better use.

Just my opinion ...

Blue skies ...

--rita

[Cruisemaiden]

For what its worth...I think "something extra" is a nice touch and do agree money is one of the best "Thank You" gifts a steward can get. BUT, how about when giving your steward that "extra tip" you give it to them in a nice souviner money clip with a theme from maybe your home state??? I have never seen a female steward...so not sure on that one...we have always had a man. Just thinking out load..if you don't like the idea...please don't bash me! LOL

[HeatherInFlorida]

I would never bring "homemade" goodies ... that's why I said a box of candy or basket of cookies or nuts which are obviously sealed.

But after reading all these responses and truthfully finding it all very depressing, I have decided that since these gifts might be considered "tacky" or "useless", I just won't do it. It's a bit of a shock to me to learn that anyone anywhere looks at a gift in this way. I was never considering not giving the money anyway and it's far easier to just give the money and be done with it.

It wouldn't make any sense to go to the extra trouble of bringing a small gift if it's unwanted. So much for thoughtfulness and long live the almighty dollar. I'm sorry because I know I'm disagreeing with the people I usually agree with the most, but I just think it's sad that it always come back down to money.

[peaches from georgia]

I think the key is to give some thought to how you are treating the HAL stewards by giving them a 'goody bag'. Would you do the same for stewards in the U.S. when traveling? Do you take a trinket bag from your home state/city when you are staying in a hotel? Or nuts and candy?

I love the HAL stewards and think they do a fantastic service in a most friendly manner. BUT, giving them little trinkets, TO ME, is treating them like children and not the adults and professionals they are, and is a little demeaning.

[kalamari]

I guess gifts considered as "tacky" can vary between one person's opinion and another's. I do know that the money and letter thing always works. I think it's better to err on the side of caution and do something that you know will be appreciated. It's funny, when my sweetie goes home on his vacations, etc. you would be surprised how much crap he throws out, stuff he either bought and didn't use, or stuff that someone else gave him...and yes, some of it was stuff I may have given him! :) I could probaby write a good book on comments of passengers that I've heard from him, from cutlural blunders to things people have given him, and sadly many times passengers are not aware of it. I think the best advice I could give having seen the "other side" of the industry is to write the letters directly to the company and give cash..Menina

I would never bring "homemade" goodies ... that's why I said a box of candy or basket of cookies or nuts which are obviously sealed.

But after reading all these responses and truthfully finding it all very depressing, I have decided that since these gifts might be considered "tacky" or "useless", I just won't do it. It's a bit of a shock to me to learn that anyone anywhere looks at a gift in this way. I was never considering not giving the money anyway and it's far easier to just give the money and be done with it.

It wouldn't make any sense to go to the extra trouble of bringing a small gift if it's unwanted. So much for thoughtfulness and long live the almighty dollar. I'm sorry because I know I'm disagreeing with the people I usually agree with the most, but I just think it's sad that it always come back down to money.

[HeatherInFlorida]

Actually, I surprise myself as to how much of the "crap" I've gotten on a cruise (and paid for) that I end up tossing out!!:D

In answer to Peaches, yes I absolutely would do it in the U.S. if any of the help even came close to treating me as well as the Cabin Steward does. What I called a "gift", you call a "trinket bag" and I have to say it does take on a somewhat different meaning.

When I visit friends right here in the U.S. I often bring nuts or candy and not one of them has ever considered it "tacky" so far as I know. But maybe it has to do with the part of the country you're from. Where I'm from, token gifts, "goody bags", etc., are not a insult. We do it all the time.

I can understand almost all the points about why not to do this, but the one I certainly don't understand is to say that a gift of any kind is demeaning.

[peaches from georgia]

When I visit friends I also take a hostess gift, which is what you are talking about it seems (others said 'trinkets and goody bags', but my post was not specifically to any one person). Aren't goody bags given out at children's birthday parties?

My point is that taking a gift to your host or hostess is one thing, but who takes T-shirts, hometown key chains, and other goody bag items to the hotel personnel who are cleaning your room and making you comfortable as part of their job?

This is NOT to say that the HAL stewards (and other service personnel on HAL or in hotels) are not wonderful people and we have had a great relationship with every steward we have ever had. But they are doing their job in a professional manner. A great tip and a letter of commendation to their superiors are in order to show appreciation and much more valued by the stewards than a goody bag.

I don't know where the idea started that, though it may make the giver feel good, that the stewards really want this stuff. Phone cards- another story. Giving the proper phone card for their home area is like giving additional cash and most assuredly shows your appreciation with something tangible they can use and which has value.

[sail7seas]

It really isn't necessary that we agree about this subject.....or any other, for that matter. Each has valid points and each certainly should do as they think best.


I agree that nuts and candy and flowers etc are nice hostess gifts. We never arrive at anyone's door uninvited :o or empty handed. :)

[HeatherInFlorida]

I think the key is to give some thought to how you are treating the HAL stewards by giving them a 'goody bag'. Would you do the same for stewards in the U.S. when traveling? Do you take a trinket bag from your home state/city when you are staying in a hotel? Or nuts and candy?

I love the HAL stewards and think they do a fantastic service in a most friendly manner. BUT, giving them little trinkets, TO ME, is treating them like children and not the adults and professionals they are, and is a little demeaning.

When I posted earlier it was in response to the above post and to the terms I've marked in bold. Peaches, while I know you did not specifically address the question to me, I was simply answering for myself because I was the only one I could remember being specific about "nuts or candy".

We can, of course, beat this to death. We simply don't agree and I have no problem with that. Truthfully, I don't think there is a right or wrong here. I just see it differently.

That said, I don't know how others feel who have posted on this thread, but personally I will never bring anything whatsoever onboard for a cabin steward.

But I will defend to my death my right to believe that a gift, no matter how small or insignificant it may be, should never be perceived as demeaning by the recipient. It is a thoughtful gesture on the part of the giver.

[QuitMyDayJob]

I have found this thread extremely helpful. Lots of different opinions and experiences, and just a great discussion.

It is the thought that counts, and I would expect that the stewards feel the same way. Even if they throw or give your gift away, they surely see the gesture as something positive. I see now though that a small gift, perhaps consumable is the way to go. (Even my kids have said "Enough with the sweatshirts; how many can we possibly wear!) Menina, thank you for your specific comment, I wouldn't have seen the benefit to writing a letter over just the comment card, so thanks.

One question: do most of you tip pre and post cruise? I saw a couple of comments about giving your tip or part of it at the beginning. I never considered it.

One last thing: Someone mentioned that cabin stewards are always male. We had a female assistant cabin steward (or maybe they have another title).

[stanford's girl]

Menina,

Thanks for the wonderful suggestion about writing a letter to the company. I have always filled out a comment card and found the right person on the ship to tell about someone going above and beyond to make my stay enjoyable. But since the comment cards take so long for the person to get feed back on, I will now always write to the company instead. Thanks again for the inside info.:D

[sail7seas]

Some other cruiselines have female cabin stewards. HAL does not. Aside from female Officers and singers/dancers/entertainers in the shows, the only ladies who work aboard HAL ships are bar stewardesses, wine stewardesses, front office ladies, creuise staff, concierge, spa/salon workers, photographers and Club HAL.


We NEVER pre-tip at the beginning of a cruise. It seems like a bribe, to me. In the event we were experiencing disappointing service, we would speak up to appropriate people but we would not pre-tip in order to get good service. We have never had to.

We ALWAYS tip at the end (except for room service stewards or others where it is a one time situation and we may not see that person again. There are times it seems more appropriate to tip at the time the service is rendered.)

[QuitMyDayJob]

Ok, so what do you attribute our experience with the female assistant cabin steward? And while I'm on the subject--do you all tip the assistants? Assistant concierge (especially if they've helped you directly), the busboy/asst. waiter, asst. cabin steward.

[Kami's pal]

The first time I took a cruise was on Crystal. I was overwhelmed by the service of the cabin steward and waiters. Even if I was on a different part of the ship, or on shore, if they saw me they spoke my name, smiled, asked if I was OK and so on. Their concern for me was so generous. I had never experienced anything like it. I started to think in terms of wanting to give them something special, instead of 'just money'. A very experienced couple had adopted me. They gently informed me that I would be wrong to do that. I'd be mistaking the professional hospitality service for personal friendship which would be wrong. In fact their supervisors might counsel them about inappropriate behavior. They told me to write notes specifying names and the helpful service I'd experienced. For instance, maybe the supervisor didn't know that my waiter from the dining room had seen me in the buffet line and knowing I was alone, escorted me to a place with another of "his" passengers. Or that my steward had seen me miss the turn (going aft instead of forward) and called me back even though it meant that he missed the next crew tender. Or that the cabin steward, without my asking, took my soaking wet jacket away during turn down and brought it back dry and ready the next morning. Or that an assistant waiter had seen me take too big a 'smidge' of a hot condiment and arrived with a bread stick just in time. These were all above and beyond. Certainly I felt cosseted and cared for and very grateful. I was advised that a sincere thank you, followed by a letter (not just a comment on the card), and a tip were the most appropriate and most welcomed recognition that I could give to these hard working professionals. Trying to make them my 'friend' was not.

[kalamari]

Another word on the "gift" stuff: you have to think culture as well. If someone is a hindu, muslim, or israeli, that worst thing you could do is give them some sort of food gift that was beef, pork, or not kosher. I think the idea of the goody bag is a nice gesture, but can also be misinterpreted in the cultural sense (can tell you stories about that too!). People don't want to be bought with a gift, but it is common protocol on the ships to tip for extra good service so there is no way that can be misunderstood. I think in the end, the best thing is to "keep it simple and keep it so it can't be misunderstood". Hence, back to cash and letters to the cruise company. Even the phone card thing is risky, there are so many out there, some can't be used in certain ports, if they can, no guarantee crew member has time off in that port to use it. Menina

The first time I took a cruise was on Crystal. I was overwhelmed by the service of the cabin steward and waiters. Even if I was on a different part of the ship, or on shore, if they saw me they spoke my name, smiled, asked if I was OK and so on. Their concern for me was so generous. I had never experienced anything like it. I started to think in terms of wanting to give them something special, instead of 'just money'. A very experienced couple had adopted me. They gently informed me that I would be wrong to do that. I'd be mistaking the professional hospitality service for personal friendship which would be wrong. In fact their supervisors might counsel them about inappropriate behavior. They told me to write notes specifying names and the helpful service I'd experienced. For instance, maybe the supervisor didn't know that my waiter from the dining room had seen me in the buffet line and knowing I was alone, escorted me to a place with another of "his" passengers. Or that my steward had seen me miss the turn (going aft instead of forward) and called me back even though it meant that he missed the next crew tender. Or that the cabin steward, without my asking, took my soaking wet jacket away during turn down and brought it back dry and ready the next morning. Or that an assistant waiter had seen me take too big a 'smidge' of a hot condiment and arrived with a bread stick just in time. These were all above and beyond. Certainly I felt cosseted and cared for and very grateful. I was advised that a sincere thank you, followed by a letter (not just a comment on the card), and a tip were the most appropriate and most welcomed recognition that I could give to these hard working professionals. Trying to make them my 'friend' was not.

[HeatherInFlorida]

I agree with Sail. I never pre-tip (which I also see as more of a bribe); rather we wait until the end of the cruise and tip according to the degree of service. But even in the worst case (which I can't even say we've had), I would tip the minimum suggested by the cruiseline. In the case of HAL, of course, that amount is automatically on your bill.

[RevNeal]

Hey REVNEAL - read some of your posts on another thread - you sound like a GREAT Rev - wish you were sailing with us. ( are you Lutheran by chance??)

Thanks ... I appreciate that! And, I wish I were sailing with you too ... it would mean I'd be on a dam ship!!!!! :D

I'm a United Methodist. Some would say that means I don't know what I am, and in general they're probably correct.

[RevNeal]

Ok, so what do you attribute our experience with the female assistant cabin steward? And while I'm on the subject--do you all tip the assistants? Assistant concierge (especially if they've helped you directly), the busboy/asst. waiter, asst. cabin steward.

I'm not sure I can. Was this on the Holland America Line? I've never even heard of an "Assistant Cabin Steward," much less a female one.

[QuitMyDayJob]

It was on HAL, a little over a year ago or so and was on either the Zuiderdam or Maasdam. The first day our cabin steward appeared to introduce himself and his assistant, although I can't be sure that's what her actual title was. At turn down or other times during the day when we'd encounter service on our cabin it would either be the cabin steward or this young woman, his assistant.

It's no matter, all staff we've encountered has been extraordinary. HAL is our preference by far.

We've always tipped the asst. staff (busboy, etc.) separately. Is that appropriate/common?

Thanks to everyone for the great advice!!

[kgjg]

I've never given buying trinkets ahead of time any thought, but my wife likes to get a little something for the Steward or his wife after we've got to know him. We spent a whole day in Calais France looking for Tatted Doilies for a Steward one time.

What I like to do instead is buy a bunch of t-shirts and bundle them up and take them to a church in a port we are visiting. I know that's against the law in some places, but I hardly think they would prosecute me for the gesture.

We were in Guayaquil a couple of years ago and before we left, I contacted some missionaries there and asked them if they needed anything. I heard back from them and someone wanted M&M's with peanuts. Seems you can't get them there. Another had a Canon printer but couldn't find ink for it so I took him a couple of cartridges. I also brought along a disposable camera and asked them to take pictures and send the camera back to me. I'll always cherish those pictures.

[blackbird71]

Wow - didn't expect this type of reaction -

Oh well - I will give my room steward his goody bag - complete with a few small gifts from the Charlotte area. If he does not want them - so be it - it will still be a token of thanks (along with the extra $20 I will slip him the first day- and maybe more later if they do a really great job) Not an ugly American trying to insult anyone - just a Southern'er - sharing cause I want to - and if they don't want it - I'll never know. Hey REVNEAL - read some of your posts on another thread - you sound like a GREAT Rev - wish you were sailing with us. ( are you Lutheran by chance??)

You go gal ... I like that idea.

I will do this in the future. But I will cut it now to just a Tampa Bay Bucs shirt. :eek:


After reading all the replies on this thread, there would not be a space problem, because they would be lucky to get one tee-shirt a year.

And for all those posters that po-poed your tee-shirt idea,,,, it costs $$$ for the crew members to buy tee-shirts toooooo. Sure they probably will not take it home with them, but they may replace an older tee-shirt with yours.

Yipes, you should have seen the replies I got on given the room stewardess an extra tip on the Radisson forum..... Don't it is included aready in your fare.... Mid way in my 12 day Amazon cruise, I had brought a "Thank You" card from home, and gave it with $60 for the team doing my room, and told them it was for lunch in Barbados. They were still thanking me when I got off the ship... Guess they do not get a lot of extra tips on Radisson....


http://www.northernsun.com/images/thumb/9316PracticeRandom.jpg

[sail7seas]

Ok, so what do you attribute our experience with the female assistant cabin steward? And while I'm on the subject--do you all tip the assistants? Assistant concierge (especially if they've helped you directly), the busboy/asst. waiter, asst. cabin steward.


We tip our assistant dining steward and if there are two concierges in Neptune Lounge, we normally tip both. (Not always the same amount to each).


To the best of my knowledge, we have never had an assistant cabin steward on any HAL ship.

Perhaps on other cruiselines, but on all of our HAL cruises, unless our cabin steward 'snuck' someone in to assist him, we have always only had A Single Cabin Steward....always a male.

[Ziggy7]

I give from my heart, not because I know the person or because someone expects it. I follow my heart and if it says take something to someone, I do. In my part of America, it is custom to show appreciation with gifts. I personally feel the stewards dont feel insulted or demeaned, they work with Americans for many years and also know some of the cutoms of the pax, so I bet they know it was given in good faith :) Now if someone walked up to me and gave me a bucket of worms and it wasnt their custom, I would be offended, however I do know a few who like to fish hehehehe :) This is just my opinion, not meant to offend anyone in any way :)

[kryos]

As he says, the best thing a passenger can do to show gratitude is to WRITE a letter to the ship company AFTER the ship has returned, and send it to the ship company. The comment cards are sometimes not read until many weeks after the voyage has returned. Letters received in the coroporate office are read quickly and it is not uncommon for that letter to be passed on to a supervisor in a matter of days. The end result is being placed in better stations in serving areas (hence, more tips, etc), or being given extra time off (most work 12-14 hour days) or in rare cases opportunties for promotions, etc. when review time comes up.

Menina, thank you so much for such a wonderful idea. Sounds pretty obvious about writing a letter, but honestly, I never thought of it. I always fill out the comment cards and make certain to write in the special people who made my cruise so wonderful, thinking my comments may get them special recognition in one form or another ... but I never considered sitting down and writing a letter to the corporate headquarters upon my return home.

I will make sure to do that in the future, and I thank you for the suggestion.

Blue skies!

--rita

[sungoddess]

HAL does not employ any female cabin stewards or assistant cabin stewards on any of their ships. The position of assistant cabin steward does not even exist. All of the cabin stewards are Indonesian on HAL, and HAL does not employ Indonesian females on any of their ships.

[kryos]

We NEVER pre-tip at the beginning of a cruise. It seems like a bribe, to me. In the event we were experiencing disappointing service, we would speak up to appropriate people but we would not pre-tip in order to get good service. We have never had to.[/font]

I'm glad you said this, because I was beginning to think that maybe I was cheap. I've never tipped at the beginning of the cruise either ... it just never "sat" right with me. Maybe if I had certain "special needs" that I knew were gonna involve a lot of extra work for my cabin steward, I might consider it ... but not on a normal basis.

When I am spending good money traveling, I feel that good service should be a matter of course. I shouldn't have to "bribe" anyone to provide it by tipping upfront. Now, for excellent service ... something I seem to always get on a HAL ship ... I tip at the end of the cruise ... only offering "extra" (beyond the auto tips) to those who made my trip "extra" special. Most often those people will be my dining room waiters and cabin steward, though it could be others too. On my recent Princess cruise there was a certain bartender/waiter in one of the bars who always made my visits there very comfortable. I generally travel alone, and though I don't drink much, I got into the comfortable habit of stopping in at this one quiet bar right before turning in for the night in order to enjoy a Pina Colada and some quiet music. This particular waiter took the time to greet me by name, and when he would bring me my drink, he spent a few minutes talking with me and finding out how my day went. He honestly seemed interested in making sure I was having a good time. I felt his service went far beyond the 15% gratuity added to the bar tab and made sure to search him out on the last night with a little something extra.

But the idea of tipping someone in advance, before they've even learned my name and/or preferences, seems a little on the order of an out-and-out bribe for good service, and for that reason I just will never do it.

Blue skies ...

--rita

[dakrewser]

HAL does not employ any female cabin stewards or assistant cabin stewards on any of their ships. The position of assistant cabin steward does not even exist. All of the cabin stewards are Indonesian on HAL, and HAL does not employ Indonesian females on any of their ships.

But cabin stewards do occasionally "hire" their own assistants, don't they?

[sail7seas]

After watching the "behind the scenes' cruise special in which one of the big bosses of Carnival (was it Mr. Arison himself?) did various jobs that his crews performed, we learned that on Carnival some stewards have to 'hire' another crew person to assist them if they cannot get the job done themselves.


I do not think HAL stewards do that but might seem to remember from time to time, perhaps a steward who works the same deck might lend a hand if one of the stewards has a heavier load than he does....ie a number of cabins with 3 or 4 occupants rather than the more easy to take care of 2 pax per cabin. I think it is a part of give and take between them and simply lending a hand to the fellow who needs it one week, full well knowing they may want the help the next week. (Maybe one is not feeling well or very tired at the end of his contract or some situation like that.)

[QuitMyDayJob]

I know I wasn't hallucinating! There was an female asst. cabin steward! Thanks for the info, perhaps she was hired by the cabin steward himself.

[caribbean girl]

Yes, I do agree, Reverend, that, ultimately, our kindess and perhaps, cash are the best rewards we can give to the people who serve us onboard. I'm always embarrassed when I view passengers being rude to the staff. Unfortunately, this has happened more that once and is one of the only negatives for me in cruising, and I guess traveling as a whole. No matter where or who you are, a kindness is just that and goes a long way in making someone feel appreciated for their effort, whether it's their job or not.

[beachjeweler]

We gave our cabin and dining steward, as well as the assistant dining steward and maitre D their tips on our final night aboard. We enclosed the money inside a thank you card with a personal note for each. We delivered these in very small gift bags which also contained some small useful items bearing the OBX (Outer Banks, NC) logo since that is where we are from. All of these folks had been very intrigued to learn about our small island since they also hail from small islands. If you could have seen their smiles when they each recieved their gift bag! The following morning as we were getting ready to debark, each of these fellows made a point to find us and say thanks. It wasn't much, but clearly was meaningful to both sides.

[Pita817]

We gave our cabin and dining steward, as well as the assistant dining steward and maitre D their tips on our final night aboard. We enclosed the money inside a thank you card with a personal note for each. We delivered these in very small gift bags which also contained some small useful items bearing the OBX (Outer Banks, NC) logo since that is where we are from. All of these folks had been very intrigued to learn about our small island since they also hail from small islands. If you could have seen their smiles when they each recieved their gift bag! The following morning as we were getting ready to debark, each of these fellows made a point to find us and say thanks. It wasn't much, but clearly was meaningful to both sides.We also give our cabin steward, dining and assistant dining steward and wine steward their extra tips near the end of the cruise but not always on the final night. On our last trip our wine and drink steward was a little sub par...adequate but he really didn't impress us. Only those that truly gave the special service recieved the additional tip. Things would have to be pretty bad for us to have the auto tip taken off and that would only happen after we first spoke to the appropriate manager.
Always when we receive superior service we send a letter to the appropriate manager on the ship,the Master on the ship, the HAL home office, and a copy to the individual in care of the manager.
As far as friendships and goodie bags, we have made some very dear friends on the Zuiderdam and on one of the cruises, our assistant dining steward was actually in tears when we said our goodbyes! This was the same guy that nearly fainted on the spot when we returned on the Zuiderdam 6 month later in the same year for a second cruise and we found him in the Lido!
We have since received at our home no less than 4 phone calls from him and a few from another who are heading home to Indonesia this weekend. We plan on sending them a little something from our home town to remember us along with a picture of all of us taken on the cruise. Before we left the Zuidy on our last cruise, three of these folks gave us something from their hearts. One was an Indonesian dollar bill and another was a picture of himself with his family.
Even though they see thousands of people on their cruises, there are cases where we make long and lasting impressions and sometimes we are just as special to them as they are to us. I think for these special aquaintances the gift bags or remembrances would be appreciated. :)

[shipcafe]

A few years ago I read an idea on CCBoards to bring a goody bag for our cabin steward. I did this and though it was a nice touch. In the goody bag were some things from my city-for example - a NFL t-shirt, a magnet from charlotte , pralines, and a few other small items - a phone card, stamps - excetra....I think I might have spent less than $20 on it....I think my stewad enjoyed the idea - I saw him wearing the NFL Panther shirt when he was off duty....I did not do this to receive "special" treatment - just a reverse bonvoyage gift. ( I usually give the steward an extra tip at the beginning of the cruise also) It's really nice to learn where they are from - and about their family. Thought I would pass this on.
Sandy
Charlotte

Not to be a "downer" but I believe that the steward would much prefer cash (or rather gift cards) and/or phone cards. The shirt is a nice idea, though. Their own cabin space is limited and, quite frankly, they are there to make a living . . just my two cents. :)

[Nanner]

We don't tip at the start of the cruise, but on the roundtrip to Hawaii last year on the Amsterdam we did tip our room steward in Honolulu. We had an overnight in port and figured he might like some money for the stop, so it was an advance on the money we planned to give him at the end of the cruise.

It was very appreciated, and if we do another longer cruise I would repeat the gesture.

[caribbean girl]

I like your take on it Pita 817. I think that, inspite of the fact that the folks who work on these ships see large #s of people, there are connections made, mostly based on kindness and courtesy. I think genuine kindness makes the greatest impression, especially in this forum, where some passengers take service, etc. for granted. It's true that we come to expect the quality of service to be on a certain level, but we must never forget that the people who give it have feelings. Yes they are making a living and do this by choice, but they mostly do so because it is very hard to find good jobs in their own countries. They are separated from their families for large chunks of time, which must be very hard. And, whether it's as a result of training or not, they manage to always be pleasant and have a lovely attitute. In our conversations with staff on different ocasions, we have learned that this politeness is a result of culture and upbringing, something we could use more of in the US. I think it would be hard to get this same kind of general attitude from American staff for the same pay.