The question no one asks

I've read a lot of posts on river cruising: dress code, water levels, excursions, etc. But no one asks about fellow passengers. Remember, you're going to be spending hours every day (unless you're sick in bed for several days which I did and don't recommend) with these people. Pax on river cruises are self-selective. They're not there for the casino, the glitzy entertainment, or the wet t-shirt contests. They're there for the scenery, the exposure to a different culture, the slow pace of the trip. So they're just like you. With a rare exception, these are people you'd be friends with back home. They're interesting and informed with a variety of life experiences. It's like traveling with good friends, and you'll be sorry to say good-bye to them at the end. There's a reason there are rarely tables for two. These are people you'll want to get to know and time is fleeting. Enjoy.

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So very true! In some ways, it's the best part of the trips we have taken.

Morning Hawkeye65

Like you have said the cruises are nothing short of being Spectacular and constantly changing with every twist and bend of the rivers, however like you say it is the Folks that you meet and the Friendships that are formed as those are the Ships that Shall be Sailing Forever and A Day.

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Yes. Good point. And for those who only want tables for 2 and not to socialize with fellow pax then river cruising is not for you.

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Yes. Good point. And for those who only want tables for 2 and not to socialize with fellow pax then river cruising is not for you.

 

 

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Disagree with this. My DH and I would prefer tables for 2 and are not social butterflies and we love river cruising. Not saying we didn't socialize but we like bus trips, small river boats and small towns and absolutely loved our first river cruise. Looking forward to the next one in Oct.

As an introvert married to an extrovert, I bemoan the lack of larger tables! On Avalon, I think there were 2 8-seaters (one on each side?) but it was hard to get a seat there because of a few larger family groups on our cruise. Large tables work well for us - I can remain introverted and quiet and my husband can talk to a few different people. Tables for 4 are hard because the other couple (usually) keep trying to involve me in the conversation :rolleyes: On the other hand, tables for 2 & 4 are constantly pushed together and pulled apart and the dining room is so small that you're functionally part of a larger group even if you are at a 2 person table. IF YOU WANT TO BE. No one really minds a little table cross-talk, and some welcome it more than others....

So, I agree that it is entirely possible to remain solitary IF YOU CHOOSE. If you're a solo traveler, no need to worry you'll be ignored! But if you don't want to engage, no one is going to make you. And I appreciate this!!!

(I also escaped to the upper deck - in December! - if I needed solitude ;p)

Okay, there's another unasked question related to this one. What if you are sociable with a group onboard and as you all get to know one another over the first few days there turns out to be one very annoying member in that group. At that point the group expects to have you sit with them for dinner, ride the same bus, be in the same tour group. How does one handle it without being awkward? This happened on our Rine Moselle cruise and we really liked the 2 wives and 1 husband in the group but the second husband became downright insulting as we got to know him and we then just wanted to avoid him. We would go ashore last so we could choose a walking group that they weren't in and we awkwardly joined other tables for dinner. Any other suggestions?

I've read a lot of posts on river cruising: dress code, water levels, excursions, etc. But no one asks about fellow passengers. Remember, you're going to be spending hours every day (unless you're sick in bed for several days which I did and don't recommend) with these people. Pax on river cruises are self-selective. They're not there for the casino, the glitzy entertainment, or the wet t-shirt contests. They're there for the scenery, the exposure to a different culture, the slow pace of the trip. So they're just like you. With a rare exception, these are people you'd be friends with back home. They're interesting and informed with a variety of life experiences. It's like traveling with good friends, and you'll be sorry to say good-bye to them at the end. There's a reason there are rarely tables for two. These are people you'll want to get to know and time is fleeting. Enjoy.

 

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Lovely post and very well expressed.

Disagree with this. My DH and I would prefer tables for 2 and are not social butterflies and we love river cruising. Not saying we didn't socialize but we like bus trips, small river boats and small towns and absolutely loved our first river cruise. Looking forward to the next one in Oct.

Which ships did you sail on? I was on three different ships both Avalon and AMA and there were NO tables for 2.

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Avalon Vista, Dec 2014 - lots of tables for 2. But often pushed together to make tables for 4....

Okay, there's another unasked question related to this one. What if you are sociable with a group onboard and as you all get to know one another over the first few days there turns out to be one very annoying member in that group. At that point the group expects to have you sit with them for dinner, ride the same bus, be in the same tour group. How does one handle it without being awkward? This happened on our Rine Moselle cruise and we really liked the 2 wives and 1 husband in the group but the second husband became downright insulting as we got to know him and we then just wanted to avoid him. We would go ashore last so we could choose a walking group that they weren't in and we awkwardly joined other tables for dinner. Any other suggestions?

This is an introvert's biggest fear :p (ok, maybe not *biggest*, but still) Actually, I don't travel to make friends and one thing we're pretty consistent about is inconsistency - we sit with different people, we do tours with different people, etc. Start out as we mean to go on - that way we don't have to "deal" with the issue later on the trip.

If I were in your case, I'd try to make new friends or ignore that rude 4th. In that scenario, it's highly unlikely you'll be able to JUST interact with the 3 you like - it's all or nothing with a group like that on a cruise....

It depends who you sit with doesn't it- on our recent cruise we met some people who were great fun; others in the middle of a fight which had clearly been going on for a while; others treat you like they are interviewing you for a job- what do you do? You can tell they are trying to find out if you are worth talking to! It took all sorts on our cruise...from the belligerent sisters to the guy in the wife beater at the farewell dinner...I had no idea the people watching was so much fun!

Okay, there's another unasked question related to this one. What if you are sociable with a group onboard and as you all get to know one another over the first few days there turns out to be one very annoying member in that group. At that point the group expects to have you sit with them for dinner, ride the same bus, be in the same tour group. How does one handle it without being awkward? This happened on our Rine Moselle cruise and we really liked the 2 wives and 1 husband in the group but the second husband became downright insulting as we got to know him and we then just wanted to avoid him. We would go ashore last so we could choose a walking group that they weren't in and we awkwardly joined other tables for dinner. Any other suggestions?

On all 3 of our river cruised we did become with friends with several other couples and ate together and often toured together. But now you have me worried that I'm the one husband everyone was trying to get away from and I just thought they like eating and touring with us.

Yes. Good point. And for those who only want tables for 2 and not to socialize with fellow pax then river cruising is not for you.

 

 

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Been on 5 river cruises and would rather have a table for two. So, I guess you are wrong.

On all 3 of our river cruised we did become with friends with several other couples and ate together and often toured together. But now you have me worried that I'm the one husband everyone was trying to get away from and I just thought they like eating and touring with us.

No way Papa B...the person in question was not from Tennessee.

Been on 5 river cruises and would rather have a table for two. So, I guess you are wrong.

What am I wrong about? which 5 ships did you have a table for two every meal?

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We do it all, I guess. Sometimes we sit with another couple, sometimes as part of a larger group. Sometimes we choose to have a quiet dinner by ourselves. Same thing with tour groups. Sometimes we'd make prior arrangements to be part of a group with others, and other times we'd make sure to choose a group that we knew certain individuals were not part of. ;)

We have been on five river cruises so I will respond to my experience regarding the options of dining.Our last river cruise we were a group of four our best friends traveled with us for the first time. My friends didn't want to share a table with others.. I missed the opportunity to sit with new people but at breakfast we did try to sit with others..Once we did have the obnoxious person but the following night we just sat at another table.. I have noticed that after a few nights people have formed their group which is ok if you are all compatible...We like to move around and meet different people..Just my two cents...

There is nothing wrong about wanting a table for 2. The reason for me pointing out that very few ships have them is that many will just assume that it's like an ocean cruise and tables for 2 will be available for those who want them. Research Research Research if this is a nonnegotiable for you.

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Lovely post and very well expressed.

Thank you.

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Okay, there's another unasked question related to this one. What if you are sociable with a group onboard and as you all get to know one another over the first few days there turns out to be one very annoying member in that group. At that point the group expects to have you sit with them for dinner, ride the same bus, be in the same tour group. How does one handle it without being awkward? This happened on our Rine Moselle cruise and we really liked the 2 wives and 1 husband in the group but the second husband became downright insulting as we got to know him and we then just wanted to avoid him. We would go ashore last so we could choose a walking group that they weren't in and we awkwardly joined other tables for dinner. Any other suggestions?

Just take my wife aside and politely explain that you can't stand me either. She'll understand.

As an introvert married to an extrovert, I bemoan the lack of larger tables! On Avalon, I think there were 2 8-seaters (one on each side?) but it was hard to get a seat there because of a few larger family groups on our cruise. Large tables work well for us - I can remain introverted and quiet and my husband can talk to a few different people. Tables for 4 are hard because the other couple (usually) keep trying to involve me in the conversation :rolleyes: On the other hand, tables for 2 & 4 are constantly pushed together and pulled apart and the dining room is so small that you're functionally part of a larger group even if you are at a 2 person table. IF YOU WANT TO BE. No one really minds a little table cross-talk, and some welcome it more than others....

 

So, I agree that it is entirely possible to remain solitary IF YOU CHOOSE. If you're a solo traveler, no need to worry you'll be ignored! But if you don't want to engage, no one is going to make you. And I appreciate this!!!

 

(I also escaped to the upper deck - in December! - if I needed solitude ;p)

Piping in to empathize re: being an introvert married to an extrovert! For other introverts, if you're on a Viking cruise (and I'm sure other lines, but I'm only familiar with Viking), consider enjoying a meal on the Aquavit terrace if you need a break from larger table dining. We particularly loved the breakfast service, as you could enjoy all of the made to order options, often with little to no crowd (and tables for two).

The table for 2 topic is interesting.

On river cruises we've been all over the map. Our 1st cruise we met people and ended up sitting with them and their friends every evening. Our waitstaff got to know us and were able to help my wife make dinner choices. Very nice.

On other river cruises we randomly sat at different tables. Sometimes we'd meet some nice folks we'd make arrangements to dine with for the rest of the cruise.

On our May-June Viking Ocean cruise we preferred dining at a table for 2, only dining with others on 3 evenings.

LOVE the Aquavit for lunch. Have to try evenings.

just take my wife aside and politely explain that you can't stand me either. She'll understand.

:') :')

Yes. Good point. And for those who only want tables for 2 and not to socialize with fellow pax then river cruising is not for you.

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I beg to differ. We often choose a table for 2 when it is just DH and I. We work long hours and enjoy our time together on vacation. While we sometimes choose to share, we are often very happy to have a dinner for just the 2 of us.

We have taken 14 and have three more booked. Suits us just fine.;)