I'm having a difficult time. Any serious advice?

First off, go away flamers and trolls. Were trying to plan a family cruise next year. I'm seriously worried about DD and her wife on excursions off the ship. ATM the plan is for them to stay with us, DS's or really mean as a snake other DD. Having a convo that it may be a bad idea to hold hands just seems deplorable, and I dont want do it. BUT I remember what things were like when I was younger. They may not be accepted in other countries. But I don't want them harassed if we can help it. Damg it all! We tried to plan a FAM vacation with everything for ever ybody and this just occurred to me yesterday. Damg it dang it dang it

I do not mean this in a mean or condesending way at all, but what is your question?

Yes, what is your question(s) or issues? What is the sailing info and etc.???

If you are asking about public displays of affection by same sex couples, it is not a good idea in foreign countries. It is not really in good taste anywhere in my opinion.

If I am understanding you correctly, you are asking if any public displays of affection is OK in foreign countries. The answer is no, don't risk it. You will not be in the US. It is not worth the risk of getting hassled, harassed or arrested--depending on the country. Just don't. It is not worth it just to make some kind of point or to be cute. Not trying to flame.

Philip

Sober up granny and post again. We don't know what you are asking.

Sorry guess there's no question. Read a lot of threads yesterday and now afraid DD and wifey won't be safe. Have to make sure they stay with DH or DS

What kind of horrible mother has to tell her kid don't hold hands, it could get you killed or arrested. I've just managed to upset myself. Sorry for posting at all. Shhh you're right James, the wine got me.

Tried so hard to plan a great vacation for all the kids and grandkids. Now I feel stupid I didnt consider this aspect in regards to DD. And its ticked me off, not that that does any good either.

No public display of affection. What about the way they dress? Wifey could easily pass as a 13 year old boy. She's a tiny lady.maybe five foot tall and 100 pounds. She dresses pretty much the same as my 10 year old grandson. Anything else I should tell them? Anything I should do to keep them safe? Maybe I'm over reacting. Were going to the Bahamas, I read stuff about Jamaica and scared myself.

I think you may be overreacting a bit.

Wherever one travels one has to adjust ones actions at times so as to not attract unnecessary attention or reactions. You know, like not wearing expensive jewelry or hanging tons of camera equipment around your neck. Or covering up when going into churches or mosques.

I would say the same goes for public displays of affection (same-sex or opposite sex).

Thank you all. I guess I over reacted and my common sense flew out the window.

There is an awful lot of the good old USA I won't hold hands with my husband in.

Exactly. Try holding hands in Mississippi, Alabama or even Arizona.

My husband and I have been together in the Bahamas and noticed no negative vibe. Same thing for Bermuda. He has traveled a bit in Puerto Rico with groups of gay and lesbian folks and experienced no problems. And then there's Key West where only odd balls are welcome. Not sure where else your cruise is headed to. I agree that public displays of affection are at times dangerous. And I plan to steer clear of Jamaica. I think we would be safe there, but I am not thrilled about the anti-gay vibe nor about supporting their economy.

I've done my own research about this, reading other threads, websites, etc. I think if your goal is to explore other countries and see what they have to offer in terms of food, shopping and excursions, you should be absolutely fine.

A lot of the countries cruises go to are behind the US in terms of equality, but don't forget there is still a lot of negativity here, too.

Yeah, it might be tough to not want to hold hands or take a photo kissing in front of a beautiful landscape, but I think it will be very easy to forget all that and simply enjoy the visit.

Patrick, I'm pretty sure she was referring to "flamers" meaning people on message boards who flame posters they do not like. Not the gay term.

Anyway, it really comes down to where you are going. But generally a good idea to tone everything down in foreign countries, whether it be PDA, wearing expensive jewelry, or showing too much skin in a church.

o

My husband and I have been married for 50 years and back in the days when we were courting, it was very common to hold hands when walking down the street. We still do, not always but quite often, when going for a walk. We live in Canada. Please let me know why you would not hold hands in Mississippi, Alabama or even Arizona. What might happen.

I seriously do not know why. Thank you.

o

Sorry guess there's no question. Read a lot of threads yesterday and now afraid DD and wifey won't be safe. Have to make sure they stay with DH or DS

What kind of horrible mother has to tell her kid don't hold hands, it could get you killed or arrested. I've just managed to upset myself. Sorry for posting at all. Shhh you're right James, the wine got me.

You indicated DD and wifey, so I assume they are married or in a "married" relationship.

My guess is they are more aware of the issues you are concerned about, than you think.....;)

You indicated DD and wifey, so I assume they are married or in a "married" relationship.

 

My guess is they are more aware of the issues you are concerned about, than you think.....;)

I love them dearly. But they live in a small town and have never been anywhere. Am I stupid and over worried? Yeah I'm the mom, its my job. They are naive compared to other friends I have. I'm just the mom AMD worried. And frankly im not thrilled about being in a foreign country. I'm nor wrong for wanting my kid safe. Pkease forgive any wrong "words". They keep changing and I can't keep up.

o

 

My husband and I have been married for 50 years and back in the days when we were courting, it was very common to hold hands when walking down the street. We still do, not always but quite often, when going for a walk. We live in Canada. Please let me know why you would not hold hands in Mississippi, Alabama or even Arizona. What might happen.

 

I seriously do not know why. Thank you.

 

 

 

 

 

o

Hi sweetie. In the US south people can be ummmm nitwits. Legal, law or whatever, people have their views. I have dear dear friends. Even now they don't reveal their true lives, they'd lose their jobs, social status, whatever. It's not relegated to the south, just maybe more prevalent there. Harassment, arrest, aggravation. Holding hands in the south might be nothing, or it might be a day of needless irritation.

I love them dearly. But they live in a small town and have never been anywhere. Am I stupid and over worried? Yeah I'm the mom, its my job. They are naive compared to other friends I have. I'm just the mom AMD worried. And frankly im not thrilled about being in a foreign country. I'm nor wrong for wanting my kid safe. Pkease forgive any wrong "words". They keep changing and I can't keep up.

A thought from me (a married lesbian)...if my mom/dad said to me "I don't want you hurt, here look at some of these articles about violence, etc etc"...I wouldn't be the least bit offended. Just remind her how much you love and support them, and, are concerned for their safety.

As for ports, I don't know where you are going...but, i have never had any issues when visiting. Granted, i have never been to Jamaica (which my wife & our two kids will absolutely not be getting off the ship at, simply because the country doesn't deserve my hard earned $$). I've been to Bahamas, Grand Cayman, Cozumel, St. Thomas, St. Martin, Puerto Rico, Honduras, Belize...never had any issues. Keep in mind though, when we were visiting we were never over the top with public displays of affection. I don't think we even held hands...we were too busy tubing/snorkeling/shopping/hiking/riding ATVs, etc etc etc.

So, again - honest conversation (if they are level headed and mature this shouldnt be an issue) would probably be best in my mind.

Good luck - have a great time!!!

So, again - honest conversation (if they are level headed and mature this shouldnt be an issue) would probably be best in my mind.

I had a whole response written in my head, but I think that Flip Flop Gal summarized it quite nicely!

I do want to say that it is very obvious that you love your daughter and her wife, and that you care about their well-being. Never worry about using the exact right words or apologizing for phrasing something wrong when you speak with love and caring in your heart. I am sure that your concern is very much appreciated.

I hope you and your family have a wonderful cruise!

Thank you everyone. We've finally booked, and everyone is very excited! I feel better now. I probably got worked up over nothing, but better safe than sorry. And frankly ya all are probably right they already know what they need to know. I've decided a "general family" talk about how to conduct themselves in port is the easiest way to ensure my own peace of mind. I may need to be more concerned about bonehead son!

Thank you all. I guess I over reacted and my common sense flew out the window.

Just common sense..stay in groups,avoid PDA's.Don't carry/display pricey items. Simply good advice for any couple straight or gay when traveling.