Friends of Dorothy need not apply. (redux)

Back on board again and can confirm one more time that it is Regent company policy that "Friends of Dorothy" gatherings are no longer allowed.

Told you so in February then the thread was closed.

Discuss.

Not "allowed"? Not mgmt- supported? Sounds weird.

I did not notice any postings of meetings in passages on our recent cruise. However, there were a few gay couples onboard, and they seemed to having a good time.

TPA - As you might recall from the thread earlier this year, a number of us asked you to clarify your statements of the nature that FOD "gatherings are no longer allowed". You were asked whether you meant that such meetings were not posted in Passages when a request was made to do so or whether you were suggesting the totally preposterous notion that the meetings themselves were proscribed.

To the best of my understanding after re-reading that thread a few minutes ago, you did not respond to clarify the matter in either regard.

My partner and I have been on a number of Regent cruises on which FOD meetings were posted in Passages. If the issue is posting the meeting, then a simple visit to the CD or GM would likely remedy the confusion easily. Even if the meeting is posted, you might well find, as we have done, that very few people attend.

However, to initiate a thread by making the rather reckless statement that "it is Regent company policy that "Friends of Dorothy" gatherings are no longer allowed" is disturbing and should reasonably require both clarification of what you meant to state and disclosure of the source of this rather shocking company policy.

We eagerly await your further clarifying contribution to this discussion (after all, you ended your provocative original post with the word "Discuss".)

Cheers, Fred

To clarify, it was stated by both the cruise director and assistant cruise director (who are both quite nice) that it is Regent company policy to no longer list FOD gatherings, even if requested, in the daily Passages newsletter. This also applies to service clubs. Bill W. and religious service gatherings are still listed.

I have always found Regent ships to be quite welcoming to LGBT travelers. Frankly, I'm puzzled by this policy.

Let me venture a guess. The company policy is to no longer use Passages to list special group meetings. There are usually numerous "special groups" on Regent sailings. Apparently Regent has decided it must either accommodate all requests for a Passages listing or none.

To clarify, it was stated by both the cruise director and assistant cruise director (who are both quite nice) that it is Regent company policy to no longer list FOD gatherings, even if requested, in the daily Passages newsletter. This also applies to service clubs. Bill W. and religious service gatherings are still listed.

 

I have always found Regent ships to be quite welcoming to LGBT travelers. Frankly, I'm puzzled by this policy.

I am not sure what a service club is. What, for example, could have been listed before that can't be listed now? The FOD exclusion doesn't make sense. Did anyone say why this policy was instituted? Is this policy written somewhere?

I am not sure what a service club is. What, for example, could have been listed before that can't be listed now?

Service clubs include Lions, Rotary and Kiwanis. In terms of what Regent will no longer announce in the daily Passages, we have:

• Service club meetings (something I have never actually seen on board)

• Friends of Dorothy LGBT gatherings

The following groups are approved for listing in the daily Passages with everything but the religious services included in today's:

• Friends of Bill W.

• Social and Solo Travelers

• Bridge Players (un-hosted)

• Religious Groups (for weekly services)

So the point of my comment here is that it is unusual for a company like Regent, who has always been friendly to and accepting of the LGBT community, to make a policy change such as this.

Try hanging flyers all throughout the ship announcing the meetings and soon enough they'll be back in Passages.

We are currently on the Voyager. When we wanted to set up a Meet & Greet, the officers and staff were very accommodating (gave us the Voyager Lounge, sent out invitations and set up a coffee center in the lounge) but told me that they no longer listed any type of group meetings in Passages. This afternoon I checked three days worth of Passages and there were no group meetings mentioned.

Perhaps, if meetings of this type are needed, they can be announced on Roll Call and someone can volunteer to set up a meeting time and place. I may be naive, but I wonder if "meetings" are needed on Regent. Everyone is included and welcome on Regent and, IMO, do not need to be segregated.

One of the nice things about being a service club member or a cruise critic member or a member of the purple polka dots (I made that up - no use flaming me for that), is meeting people of like mind even far from home - people you have synergy with.

My experience is that no matter what, we always seem to find those people with out Passages anyway.

...they no longer listed any type of group meetings in Passages. This afternoon I checked three days worth of Passages and there were no group meetings mentioned.

Below are group meetings that are listed in Passages (three of them in yesterday's edition):

• Friends of Bill W.

• Social and Solo Travelers

• Bridge Players (un-hosted)

• Religious Groups (for weekly services)

In my mind, LGBT travelers are much closer to "Social and Solo Travelers" or "Bridge Players" then they are service clubs.

Why did Regent choose to eliminate LGBT groups?

Printing flyers now.

Below are group meetings that are listed in Passages (three of them in yesterday's edition):

 

• Friends of Bill W.

 

• Social and Solo Travelers

 

• Bridge Players (un-hosted)

 

• Religious Groups (for weekly services)

 

In my mind, LGBT travelers are much closer to "Social and Solo Travelers" or "Bridge Players" then they are service clubs.

 

Why did Regent choose to eliminate LGBT groups?

 

Printing flyers now.

Not sure what ship you are on but I did not find Friends of Bill. However, now that it is the weekend there are listings for religious services.

The "Social and Solo Travelers" and "Bridge Players" are Regent sponsored events (they have a Regent crew member - or contractor leading these events). Regent does not sponsor Cruise Critic Meet and Greets or other groups which I suppose includes LGBT. I truly do not think that trying to eliminate one specific group -- it sounds like they are not listing groups that are not sponsored by Regent (with the exception of Religious groups that sometimes are run by a Regent officer and other times are not).

The "Social and Solo Travelers" and "Bridge Players" are Regent sponsored events (they have a Regent crew member - or contractor leading these events).

The Bridge Player group listed recently was not hosted and it said so in Passages, however, as you point out the Social and Solo Travelers is hosted by a Regent crew member, usually the Social Hostess. Today, another group, "Needlepoint Fans Get Together" is also being hosted by Regent. There are two "Solo and Social Travelers" meetings listed today.

When LGBT Friends of Dorothy gatherings were allowed by Regent, they were hosted by a Regent crew member, most often someone from the entertainment staff such as a dancer.

So we're back to the question of why did Regent choose to stop hosting or even listing un-hosted LGBT Friends of Dorothy gatherings in Passages? I think I've demonstrated that Regent does indeed list certain groups. The fact that they have eliminated LGBT groups seems curiously odd to me, perhaps someone from Regent could explain their reasoning. Obviously, I think it is a bad decision and hope that Regent reconsiders.

The Bridge Player group listed recently was not hosted and it said so in Passages, however, as you point out the Social and Solo Travelers is hosted by a Regent crew member, usually the Social Hostess. Today, another group, "Needlepoint Fans Get Together" is also being hosted by Regent. There are two "Solo and Social Travelers" meetings listed today.

 

If Regent sponsors a group (like Bridge Players and Needlepoint), it remains a Regent sponsored activity whether or not a Regent crew member is there. While Regent crew members are typically at these events, Bridge Players groups do have time to play without having anyone from Regent there.

I must get back to my last question. Which ship are you on where "Friends of Bill W." was in Passages yesterday? I looked at yesterday's Passages and have today's in front of me (if I were at home I'd scan it and put it on this thread). There is no mention of Friends of Bill W. -- at least not on the Voyager.

There are so many groups that would like to appear in Passages. For whatever reason (maybe too many requests?), they made the decision to only list religious and Regent sponsored groups. Really suggest that you email Regent headquarters with your question as it seems very important to you.

On my first 6 cruises on Regent they posted in Passages that there would be a meeting for Veterans to meet each other. I really enjoyed meeting veterans from WW2 & beyond. But when I asked about the meetings on my last two cruises. the CD said it was no longer allowed.

Really suggest that you email Regent headquarters with your question as it seems very important to you.

We're on the same boat TC, enjoying the foggy day? Looks like it is finally breaking!

Let me simplify things here: Regent previously sponsored LGBT gatherings on the ship. Sometimes they were added by the cruise director, sometimes they were added by guest request. They were almost always accompanied by a member of the entertainment team. Sometimes they were well attended, sometimes they were not. Generally, the well attended ones were added by guest request.

Regent's new company policy to exclude LGBT mixers from the daily agenda is unique in the cruising industry. Almost every cruise line has a policy allowing such gatherings to be listed. Seabourn even comes right out and calls them LGBT mixers. I personally prefer the Friends of Dorothy moniker, it is as much of a cruising agenda tradition as the Bill W. meetings. Incidentally, the Bill W. meetings usually are on the agenda for the first couple of days of the cruise while the members find each other, I saw them listed early on for our cruise, but not today. Let's see if they pop back on again.

The whole point though is that adding an occasional "FOD" to the agenda, just like today's needlepoint gathering, should be no problem. There was never any great effort required in the past. But more importantly, a pre-IPO company should not set itself up to appear to be intolerant to any community. Eliminating gatherings that were previously allowed and still common practice amongst the competition potentially does that.

I know there are many LGBT PCH employees and some are placed very high within the organization. PCH is clearly not anti LGBT.

So why change a policy and risk looking that way?

On my first 6 cruises on Regent they posted in Passages that there would be a meeting for Veterans to meet each other. I really enjoyed meeting veterans from WW2 & beyond. But when I asked about the meetings on my last two cruises. the CD said it was no longer allowed.

And yet they still allow a "Needlepoint Fans Get Together"! What's up with that?

And yet they still allow a "Needlepoint Fans Get Together"! What's up with that?

I am a HUGE fan of the needlepoint get-togethers and would be most upset if they stopped them - I love to do needlepoint and due to my work schedule, one of the few times I am able to truly relax with needlepoint is while on a cruise. This is someone unique to both Regent and Oceania and is discussed with great enthusiasm at various needlecraft events. I enjoy meeting up with other people and discussing various projects and it brings people together with similar interests.

That is why I was disturbed to read on this thread that other groups are no longer promoted on Passages, most importantly, the Veterans. I remember one cruise where a number of veterans befriended some of the children and the kids were fascinated by the stories told to them - without the assistance of Passages, we would never have known who were the veterans in the group.

Not sure what is going on with upper management (this is where the decisions are being made) - on our last cruise they "gave away" the room used for Friday night Shabbat service and it so happened that more than 50 people showed up that night (which is not usual). After a number of us spoke to the GM, things improved greatly afterwards and the staff bent over backwards to make things right going forward but we still question why Regent felt it was acceptable to do something like this in the first place.

This is only a thought - possibly Regent felt that FOD is no longer necessary now that gay marriage is legal in many states and the DOMA has been turned down by the Supreme Court. In some of the northern NJ school districts, the majority of the parents within a school are gay and the property values within these school districts have skyrocketed because the school is so desirable by both gay and straight parents. Think back twenty years - times they have changed.

gnomie :)

I am a HUGE fan of the needlepoint get-togethers and would be most upset if they stopped them

Well then, I'm sure you understand why members of the LGBT community would be upset if their gatherings were stopped as well.

Has anyone who is interested in seeing FOD continue taken the time to contact upper management (i.e. Miami, not on the ship) to inquire as to why the decision was made to d/c FOD and the reasoning behind it? I have learned (as have many other cruisers who read this board) that Regent sometimes makes decisions in the home office without realizing the actual effect it will have on the passengers.

If the LGBT community is not happy with the answer supplied by Regent, they may seek to publicize their dissatisfaction using various points of social media. Right now one of the worst decisions a business can do is demonstrate any type of bias toward the gay community - as I mentioned before, the times they are changing and what was tolerated and accepted twenty years ago will no longer fly. The Fortune 500 companies are paying consultants big bucks to ensure that they are seen in a favorable light with the LGBT community. Now is the time - Prestige is in the process of initiating its IPO and the last thing they want is to be seen as anti-gay.

gnomie :)

Has anyone who is interested in seeing FOD continue taken the time to contact upper management (i.e. Miami, not on the ship) to inquire as to why the decision was made to d/c FOD and the reasoning behind it? I have learned (as have many other cruisers who read this board) that Regent sometimes makes decisions in the home office without realizing the actual effect it will have on the passengers.

 

If the LGBT community is not happy with the answer supplied by Regent, they may seek to publicize their dissatisfaction using various points of social media. Right now one of the worst decisions a business can do is demonstrate any type of bias toward the gay community - as I mentioned before, the times they are changing and what was tolerated and accepted twenty years ago will no longer fly. The Fortune 500 companies are paying consultants big bucks to ensure that they are seen in a favorable light with the LGBT community. Now is the time - Prestige is in the process of initiating its IPO and the last thing they want is to be seen as anti-gay.

 

gnomie :)

Gnomie, I completely agree with you. Even American Airlines has a GLBT

organization. I know that Crystal still has FOD and Friends Of Bill gatherings. Also don't forget gay consumers have more disposable income and travel more often. I think Regent needs to rethink this policy big time.

For many Friends of Bill W - those gatherings are a matter of life and death for many people who live with addiction. I would hope they would continue to post.

For Bridge - it's a common social game played internationally; On many cruises a rep of the American Contract Bridge League is on board to give lessons and offer duplicate games.

For many Friends of Bill W - those gatherings are a matter of life and death for many people who live with addiction. I would hope they would continue to post.

 

As, of course, is needle pointing!!!!!

 

For Bridge - it's a common social game played internationally; On many cruises a rep of the American Contract Bridge League is on board to give lessons and offer duplicate games.

Perhaps there should be an LGBT expert on board to justify those meetings!!!!

Perhaps there should be an LGBT expert on board to justify those meetings!!!!

Of course there are no LGBT experts. What a silly comment for you to make. We are talking about social not a Dr. Ruth or Dr. Phil lecture. I don't need an expert to host this type of gathering for a meet and mingle. You sound a bit homophobic with your comment.:eek: