First conversation about solo travel and safety concerns

So, totally out of the blue, we got on the topic of solo travel last night. It was very ironic since I had just started bouncing the idea around in my own head the past few days.

The main concern DH expressed was related to safety and it boils down to the potential risk that something could happen to me and nobody would miss me, possibly until I was supposed to be home. If I don't return from a port day, nobody would even be looking for me.

Do other spouses share his concern and how do you address it? I think it is a valid concern and one that I have for myself now that I think about it.

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I am sailing on my first solo in 1 week so I have had the same conversation with my husband. I am not really worried though because you get checked on and off the ship.

If you were not checked back on, I think the ship would realize you were missing. I plan on only using the ship's excursion desk to book my excursions. While on the excursion I will make it a point to have a conversation with the people leading the excursion and let them know to look for me at the end of the excursion.

I thought I might also leave a note in my stateroom with the name of the excursion I was on. Maybe the stateroom attendant would see it if I didn't return(and send out a search party?).

I also read on another thread that the person checks in and out with someone at Guest Services, but I don't really know how they did that. I might ask about doing that on the day I get on board.

Hope you enjoy your cruise if you decide to go for it!

With todays computerization, the ship computers know who has not checked back into the ship before leaving port. You would be missed!! In fact, on other threads, it has been said that, if the captain decides to leave without waiting for all passengers to return, ships personnel will enter your cabin, open your safe, and if there is a passport in the safe, they will leave it with the port authority so you will have a better chance of catching up with the ship at the next port.

I feel there is a little extra safety if you do ship excursions. You can also send a text to let them know you are back on the ship.

Go to your roll call and see if there are some group activities.

I cruise solo all the time. Hubby does not like cruising. I arrange with my cell provider for international roaming before I leave, and then, I can call him whenever I am in port. I also email him daily and let him know what I am up to. No problem. I have never had any safety issues either on the ship or in port.

I knew the ship personnel would know if someone never got back on the ship. I'm not sure what they would do about it. Would they call anyone at home and tell them? Hubby did mention he would prefer I was on scheduled excursions rather than wandering alone.

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While the ship personnel would know if a passenger does make port embarkation, because we all have heard PA announcements paging so and so, do not expect anybody from the ship to get off and look for you. And I would also not expect them to call my emergency contact.

My husband has asked me to only take ship-sponsored excursions.

So, totally out of the blue, we got on the topic of solo travel last night. It was very ironic since I had just started bouncing the idea around in my own head the past few days.

The main concern DH expressed was related to safety and it boils down to the potential risk that something could happen to me and nobody would miss me, possibly until I was supposed to be home. If I don't return from a port day, nobody would even be looking for me.

Do other spouses share his concern and how do you address it? I think it is a valid concern and one that I have for myself now that I think about it.

 

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You could arrange with your husband to send an email every evening - that seems the simplest to me. You probably could also arrange a notification relay with someone on board as well - that if you haven't "checked in", they know something is amiss and should contact X (local authorities, your family, etc).

I find it interesting if this is a common concern, since it really doesn't apply only to solo travelers - things could also happen to pairs on port days that would result in them both not returning, and no one would go looking for them. Still, I guess there's maybe more of a concern that the risk is higher for an solo person than a pair?

New Zealand has a very interesting option for outdoor activities/adventures - an online registry where you can put in details of you (including a photo if you like), your contact info, your plans, and a time that you will check in with them. If they haven't heard from you by that time they'll try and contact you, and if they can't they'll proceed to the other local contacts you've listed - if you don't have friends or family locally, they recommend you list your hotel or your next stop on your hiking trail, etc. I think it's a really smart idea, especially for visitors and not only for solos. I mention this just as an aside (not about cruising) because I happened to discover it recently while on line.

I don't worry too much about it, but perhaps I'm used to it because I travel solo so often. I do keep in touch by email regularly, so that would be missed if I didn't check in. I also am increasingly realistic about what activities I feel safe doing on my own, and which ones I should not do on my own (eg swimming on a secluded beach would be a no-no for me, but swimming on a crowded hotel beach would be OK. IMO, of course).

I think you just need to be careful. Don't go out on your own at night time or a port that is "iffy". After visiting Samana, my DH made me promise that if I am on a solo trip, I never get off the shop at that port. Now the port might have changed now, so do your research. Bottom line, be sensible and be careful.

If your concerned about it take part in your roll call and meet someone to spend the day with in port. Doesn't even need to be the same person each day. Shared taxi saves money, extra safety in pairs or groups, they might have even been to the port before and have first hand knowledge to share making your day much more fulfilling.

Really no downside unless you want to be alone but that doesn't seem to be the case here.

I would expect the ship to contact someone if you don't show up. They would need to know what to do with your things, whether to let the police in port know you went missing, and potentially leave you with a stiff fine to pay. ;)

I keep in touch with family via live blogs and posting photos on FB.

That said they've no idea what I'm doing when I'm at home. Say I were to fall down the stairs in my own home on a Friday night! the first I would be missed would be on Monday morning when I didn't turn up for work!

I travel extensively solo and have done for 30 years. Many of the places I go carry less risk that trying to get across the road at home to buy my lunch.

Yes, don't take unnecessary risks in unfamiliar places. Some places I stay onboard of I think it's too risky for a solo female or I go ashore with others.

My mother has always hated me travelling as she's convinced I'll be killed overseas. She no longer has sleepless nights about it and still doesn't like me travelling but is now resigned to the fact it's my thing and I'm not going to stop doing. Some of the issue is down to people's own anxiety of you being away rather than real risk.

My mother has always hated me travelling as she's convinced I'll be killed overseas. She no longer has sleepless nights about it and still doesn't like me travelling but is now resigned to the fact it's my thing and I'm not going to stop doing. Some of the issue is down to people's own anxiety of you being away rather than real risk.

My father is the same way, especially when I travel by road for work (far more risky than cruising or flying internationally), even though I'm now over 50. And you're right - I could be lying dead on my living room floor for several days before anyone (including my dad) would miss me, but he's apparently more nervous about me dying away from home than dying in my home ;)

So, totally out of the blue, we got on the topic of solo travel last night. It was very ironic since I had just started bouncing the idea around in my own head the past few days.

The main concern DH expressed was related to safety and it boils down to the potential risk that something could happen to me and nobody would miss me, possibly until I was supposed to be home. If I don't return from a port day, nobody would even be looking for me.

Do other spouses share his concern and how do you address it? I think it is a valid concern and one that I have for myself now that I think about it.

 

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You could always call your husband each night to check in. The cost is $1.99 per minute to call from your cabin to home. You could make it a 1-2 minute call to say you're safe and that you love him. It should put him at ease, and it's not a bad price to pay for his peace of mind... of course, dont make it an hour long conversation because then you'll be spending lots of $ on calls.

Thanks for all the input. I'll confess to having some of the same thoughts when I'm home alone for the weekend or something- that I could keel over and die and nobody would miss me for days. I'm sure we would come up with some sort of check in system.

It seems like there is an opportunity here to offer a value added service that would be really trivial to implement. Maybe treat it as a special need of some sort and passengers can choose an option that consents to the Cruise line contacting an emergency contact if they fail to return to the ship. Or gives solo passengers an option to log their intended plans on shore.

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I'm always puzzled when I read things like this. One of my pet peeves is also all the people who tell me how brave I am for traveling solo. Many, many people live alone and many also travel alone. Do I occasionally have a night where I'm out late and it occurs to me it'd be nice if someone was expecting me at home? Sure. But by and large, I use common sense and have confidence in my ability to make good choices. The same thing applies when I'm traveling.

I'm grateful that my mother has always had an easy going attitude toward this sort of thing. She has always assumed that I would be just fine out in the world on my own and I took my cues from her. I have friends whose parents flip out if they don't check in the second we get to another city, etc. when we are traveling. And they are much less sure of themselves as a result. My mom only worries about me if she doesn't hear from me for over a week and even then she knows to check FB first to see if I've posted on there before really worrying.

I'm grateful that my mother has always had an easy going attitude toward this sort of thing. She has always assumed that I would be just fine out in the world on my own and I took my cues from her. I have friends whose parents flip out if they don't check in the second we get to another city, etc. when we are traveling. And they are much less sure of themselves as a result.

My family is the opposite, lol. They demand frequent check-ins, which gets annoying, although even I would say that calling to say "hey, I landed" is pretty reasonable (but not more frequently; that's overkill). Luckily, they trust me not to get lost or wander into wrong neighborhoods in a strange city, since I've been great with directions ever since I learned to read maps and street signs at an early age.

I cope simply by adding an hour to the scheduled arrival time when asked about it, so they don't worry if I don't call the minute they let people out of the plane. This way, I can call while waiting for my hotel shuttle, when I have the downtime, after I finding my way and claiming my luggage. That, and I get to brag about the 85-degree Florida weather (when it's 39, windy, and drizzling in Chicago).

We all certainly have different lives. I live on my own. Both my

parents are gone. I have a sister and bil who live near me...they are

my family. But when it comes to cruising? We all love it but I never

check in with them when on vacation. And they don't check in with

me and I would not expect them to...maybe my thoughts just don't

go to those depths of things:eek:.....I do try to use common sense when

traveling but I have been cruising on my own for 11 years now....I

just don't worry about stuff too much.:) Oh, and for living on my

own? Been that way for almost 30 years (I am in my mid 50s) and

cruising solo? I LOVE IT and it is the only way I cruise:)

Oh, when my folks were alive, they loved to travel as well and I

don't recall them "checking in" with us either.

Like I mentioned earlier, we all live our lives differently.

My family is the opposite, lol. They demand frequent check-ins, which gets annoying, although even I would say that calling to say "hey, I landed" is pretty reasonable (but not more frequently; that's overkill). Luckily, they trust me not to get lost or wander into wrong neighborhoods in a strange city, since I've been great with directions ever since I learned to read maps and street signs at an early age.

 

I cope simply by adding an hour to the scheduled arrival time when asked about it, so they don't worry if I don't call the minute they let people out of the plane. This way, I can call while waiting for my hotel shuttle, when I have the downtime, after I finding my way and claiming my luggage. That, and I get to brag about the 85-degree Florida weather (when it's 39, windy, and drizzling in Chicago).

Stuff like this is when text messages are awesome. You can relieve their anxiety without having to get sucked into a phone conversation while you're trying to do stuff.

I think a lot of this stuff is different when you share your home with other people. If I lived alone, I surely wouldn't check in with someone every time I went out for the afternoon or something. But I think it's basic courtesy to my husband and kids to not just disappear for some unknown period of time. To me, it seems perfectly normal to say "I'm off to get a haircut and run a few errands and I'm hoping to be home by 4-ish" and to then let them know while I'm out if something delays me. I'm pretty sure my hubby would be a bit alarmed if I just randomly didn't come home one night. But none of that would happen if I lived alone. I think you just get used to the constant information flow.

Nobody in the extended family demands any check-in or anything. My parents live a couple hours away and while they appreciate if I let them know I made it home when I visit them, they don't ask me to do it. But especially if the weather is bad or some other circumstance that makes it non-routine, they're still parents and are glad to know we made it safely although they would assume no news is good news.

I don't know if I would try the solo cruise thing or not. I'd probably start simple and maybe do one of the pacific repo trips. Part of me wishes I could jump on the ones in the next couple weeks where the rates have gotten so low, but I just can't orchestrate things that quickly and it's a busy time for the kids with end of school and finals, etc.

I'm always puzzled when I read things like this. One of my pet peeves is also all the people who tell me how brave I am for traveling solo. Many, many people live alone and many also travel alone. Do I occasionally have a night where I'm out late and it occurs to me it'd be nice if someone was expecting me at home? Sure. But by and large, I use common sense and have confidence in my ability to make good choices. The same thing applies when I'm traveling.

I don't think that's what most people mean when they say those that vacation alone are brave -- I think they mean being brave enough to enjoy your own company and make your own decisions. A lot of people can't do that, or at least they don't think they can.

People are more likely to be victims of violent crime from someone they know and in familiar settings (home, school, work).

You're more 3 times likely to be struck by lightning than being a victim of violent crime aboard a cruise ship. Off the ship, stick to organized tours and cruise ship excursions, take the same precautions you would traveling anywhere, attend the solo gathering to meet other travelers to buddy up with.

In three months -

1 in 175,000 - Odds of being struck by lightning

1 in 460,000 - Odds of being victim of violent crime on NCL

2 in 835,000 - Odds of being victim of violent crime on Royal

2 in ???,??? - Odds of being victim of violent crime on Carnival (roughly the same as the other two)

*According to latest statistics of voluntarily reported alleged crimes in the past three months.

While the ship personnel would know if a passenger does make port embarkation, because we all have heard PA announcements paging so and so, do not expect anybody from the ship to get off and look for you. And I would also not expect them to call my emergency contact.

 

My husband has asked me to only take ship-sponsored excursions.

My first solo cruise I matched up with a small group (from the Roll-Call) doing off-line shore excursions. It was a small group of us, easy to get to know each other. From then on I had people to hang out with, who have turned out to be great online friends since.

After that first one, I have used the Roll-Calls to find others on the sailing, and met up for drinks Day 1, usually heading off to dine together. We used Anytime Dining and sat at tables for 10, meeting lots of others along the way.

When I have not met up with anyone on the Roll Calls I have used ship tours. They are great, sometimes having experiences you couldn't arrange for yourself.

The one time I really needed the ship's transfers & overnight hotel prior to sailing, my baggage was lost. The HAL representative got me to the front of the line at Alitalia baggage (apparently I wasn't the only one in this predicament), and argued animatedly in Italian. My bags were in my room before I returned from dinner!

Be prudent, read Rick Steve's Scams page, and enjoy doing what you want, when you want, and not answering to anyone for the duration of your vacation!