Autism and Camp Ocean (CCL)

We're heading out on the Freedom at the end of this week for a Spring Break cruise.

I really want to sign my son (who is almost 11 and is on the higher end of the autism spectrum) for Camp Ocean but my husband is concerned that there is not enough supervision, first off, and also that since we would not allow our son to sign himself out (Carnival allows kids to sign themselves in/out of the kid's club starting at age 9 with parental permission) that he would be stuck in the club room when the club activity moved to another area of ship (something we've been told happens frequently..they'll move to one of the clubs for a magic show or do a scavenger hunt all over the ship, etc.). DH is concerned that if my son got out of the kid's club area, he'd get lost/confused/scared and end up having a meltdown to the point where he'd not be able to even tell people his name, our names, etc (this has happened before, just not onboard ship).

DH insists that DS will be fine being dragged by us to every sorta-kid friendly activity we do such as trivia, etc. I know this is terrible of me, but I see SO many parents taking their kids to the kid's club and their kids having a terriffic time and I want that for our son too. I feel like such an ass for being embarrassed by being the only parent who brings their son to trivia, etc.

On one cruise in the past, we were seated at dinner with a single mom and her two daughters, one of whom was my son's age. I wanted to crawl under the table and DIE every night at dinner when the mom asked her DDs what they did all day and they talked about all these awesome fun things. On our last cruise, my son and I were walking to the bathroom and walked past one of the clubs, where the kid's club group was doing...something. IDK what. DS peered in the window and asked if he could go in. I told him no, it was just if you'd signed up for the kid's club, which we hadn't done for him because of DH's nervousness about it, and DS was like, "Oh." kind of sad and it broke my freaking heart.

I get DH's concerns...I do. I get that he wants to spend as much time with DS as possible since he works 60+ hrs a week, often getting up to go work before DS gets up for school and not arriving home from work until long after he's gone to bed. But I want DS to have as normal an experience on these vacations as he can, which for me includes going to the kid's club.

DS doesn't have to participate in everything. Pick and choose. You will get a schedule for the cruise the first night.

When the kids are on scavenger hunts etc they go in groups.

Unfortunately you have hit on a fact of life for those of us with children/adults with special needs. Sometimes, or oftentimes, it is not possible to have any alone time when you travel with your child/adult unless you take a paid or volunteer caregiver on vacation with you. I also get that since your husband works long hours, he wants to spend his vacation with his child. It is a family vacation, right?

But you can as suggested just pick and choose for the kids club to try it out and see how it goes. You also have to remember that the crew in the kids club are not special education teachers or aides and if you are expecting supervision like that, then the kids club is not for you. They will do their best with their limited resources.

Hey. Person on the spectrum with a kid on the spectrum here.

I gotta be honest. He isn't going to be that kid. Group activities like that might be painful for him. If it's not fun it just isn't fun and nothing will make it fun. I personally can't stand parties or interacting with groups of people and nothing is worse for me than being forced to sit at a table for dinner with other people besides my family. Any cruise we go on, we make sure I won't have to do that. If I have to I seize up. I have to imagine that kids on the spectrum feel pretty similarly, so I don't force my daughter to interact unless it's necessary.

We have similar issues with our daughter. Kids club type stuff is really rough for her and she doesn't want to partake in most of the activities. Our use of the kids club is usually limited to a few hours where we drop her off and make it clear that she shouldn't be forced to do anything, and just let her read a book or play games if she wants. She actually has a lot of fun on her own like that. Then we get an hour or two to ourselves for some mom and dad time, then we go get her. She's totally fine with that. She really loves cruises.

So if you want him to have some freedom on the boat, I think you should try it. You could print out deck plans and maps ahead of time and explain that room numbers increase in this direction, decrease in that direction. Show him where your room will be and make sure he knows the room number. You could also consider walkie talkies. My daughter was 6 last year when we sailed and she got separated from us on the boat. Since I had showed her the maps/deck plans before hand she was able to use the small maps near the elevators to find her way back to our cabin. Shes not the type to ask for help, if you know what I mean. Kids are smarter than you think.

The last couple of cruises, because I have dyscalculia (think dyslexia, but with numbers/math) I've decorated the door of our cabin so I can find it without wandering around the hallways going, "Wait..was it 6412 or 6214? Or 6142? ****!" because I can't remember what the number of our cabin is. So I know that part wouldn't be too hard as long as he can remember which deck our cabin is on.

Kids club type stuff is really rough for her and she doesn't want to partake in most of the activities

That's what DH is afraid of...DS won't be with his usual aides and the kids at school, some of whom he's known since preK (which includes the twin girls who declared themselves his "girlfriends" two years ago in third grade:eek::D). He's afraid it'll be too tough for him to socialize with kids he doesn't know.

If he's high functioning, I would go over the program for the kids club you get in your cabin the night before, see what activity or two interests him and let him try and go. Sign him up for the club the first night so you at least have the option of going. Let him meet the counselors and other kids in his age group. And you and your husband have a chance to meet the counselors and sound them out.

Give him a chance; all three of you may be pleasantly surprised.

And an FYI - all kids club counselors on Carnival have a background in education. They all have at least Bachelor's degrees.

The last couple of cruises, because I have dyscalculia (think dyslexia, but with numbers/math) I've decorated the door of our cabin so I can find it without wandering around the hallways going, "Wait..was it 6412 or 6214? Or 6142? ****!" because I can't remember what the number of our cabin is. So I know that part wouldn't be too hard as long as he can remember which deck our cabin is on.

 

 

 

That's what DH is afraid of...DS won't be with his usual aides and the kids at school, some of whom he's known since preK (which includes the twin girls who declared themselves his "girlfriends" two years ago in third grade:eek::D). He's afraid it'll be too tough for him to socialize with kids he doesn't know.

I don't have a child with autism, but have worked for 20 years with people who do. I think that if he wants to try it, then go for it. Tour the area on the first day so that he can become acquainted with it, talk to the staff, and see if your son wants to try. In my experience, parents tend to hold their kids back (whether they have a disability or not) more so than the kids (I have four, one with a serious auto-immune disease and am guilty of wanting to protect her). Imagine how much even a small success can help him when it comes to branching out.

We're heading out on the Freedom at the end of this week for a Spring Break cruise.

 

I really want to sign my son (who is almost 11 and is on the higher end of the autism spectrum) for Camp Ocean but my husband is concerned that there is not enough supervision, first off, and also that since we would not allow our son to sign himself out (Carnival allows kids to sign themselves in/out of the kid's club starting at age 9 with parental permission) that he would be stuck in the club room when the club activity moved to another area of ship (something we've been told happens frequently..they'll move to one of the clubs for a magic show or do a scavenger hunt all over the ship, etc.). DH is concerned that if my son got out of the kid's club area, he'd get lost/confused/scared and end up having a meltdown to the point where he'd not be able to even tell people his name, our names, etc (this has happened before, just not onboard ship).

 

DH insists that DS will be fine being dragged by us to every sorta-kid friendly activity we do such as trivia, etc. I know this is terrible of me, but I see SO many parents taking their kids to the kid's club and their kids having a terriffic time and I want that for our son too. I feel like such an ass for being embarrassed by being the only parent who brings their son to trivia, etc.

 

On one cruise in the past, we were seated at dinner with a single mom and her two daughters, one of whom was my son's age. I wanted to crawl under the table and DIE every night at dinner when the mom asked her DDs what they did all day and they talked about all these awesome fun things. On our last cruise, my son and I were walking to the bathroom and walked past one of the clubs, where the kid's club group was doing...something. IDK what. DS peered in the window and asked if he could go in. I told him no, it was just if you'd signed up for the kid's club, which we hadn't done for him because of DH's nervousness about it, and DS was like, "Oh." kind of sad and it broke my freaking heart.

 

I get DH's concerns...I do. I get that he wants to spend as much time with DS as possible since he works 60+ hrs a week, often getting up to go work before DS gets up for school and not arriving home from work until long after he's gone to bed. But I want DS to have as normal an experience on these vacations as he can, which for me includes going to the kid's club.

If your child interacts well in mainstream environments, then I'd lean toward enrolling them in Camp Carnival. I'd call Carnival and let them know what your concerns are and have them provide contact info for their special needs department. Carnival will do a great job of taking care of your family whether it's boarding, Camp Carnival, special diet or departing the ship. Let them know your concern about supervision and they will work with you. Despite a self serving award anointed to Royal Caribbean by a travel agency there's not tangible difference in the level of care your ASD child will receive from either company. Carnival gets short changed when it comes to providing service to the Autism community.

My son is low functioning and I take large groups of Autism families on both cruise lines and cruises with just my son, my wife and me. The higher functioning kids for the most part seem to do well with cruise line staff who are more Autism aware than ever.

My DS, now 12, is also on the high end of the spectrum. his first experience with kids club was on his first cruise in 2012, and he absolutely loved it. Mind you, he also had his younger brother in the same age group and room. Of course, as akward as he is with it, he tries to be social. But he obsesses, talks incessantly, and loves videogames and music.

In February, we will once again be ship-bound, but this time he will be in the next age group up from his brother. We have several concerns too, but will work through them with him, and work from his cues. We will sign him up, and see how things go.

with your son peeking through the window and wanting to join, I'd see that as a good sign. He wants to try it! as parents, we might be scared as all get-out, but just like our kids, sometimes we have to stretch our boundaries too.

How did the spring break cruise end up going?

It went fine..DS stayed with us the entire time and the only thing that went wrong was an excursion.

Our ports of call were Cozumel, Belize and Roatan (Honduras). We had paid for a cave tubing excursion through the ship in Belize and the morning we arrived, every cave tubing excursion (there were like 4 different ones, through a couple of different travel groups/agencies/whatever) was cancelled EXCEPT ours. They had recently gotten a lot of rain which had made the water rise which made it unsafe in the cave.

SO..it's a half hour or so tender boat ride from the ship to the port. Another hour and a half or so from the port to the cave system where we are to go tubing. At one point, the bus we're on (there's about 100 people on this bus besides us) goes over a very shaky looking bridge with water not even a foot from the wheels. The bus driver informed us the bridge could go at any moment.:eek:

We get to the cave system and the guide tells us "Oops! SORRY! We can't actually take you cave tubing AFTER ALL." which kind of pissed everybody off. In an attempt to save the excursion, the guide offered to take us on a hike through the jungle. Nobody in the group (at least as far as I could tell) was wearing the proper footwear for hiking of any kind. We were handed these helmets (IDK what for) and told to keep them on, no matter what. DS didn't like that and kept trying to take his off.

We ended up having to hike through the jungle for three and a half freaking hours with very little water (there were I think 2 water breaks, only very small cups and we were told we could only have one cup each) despite it being hotter than the devil's backside. DS did his best but it was monstrous for pretty much everyone involved. He was pissed we didn't get to go cave tubing.

We DID at the end of it get to go river tubing but even that sucked donkey butt. The guide was in such a hurry to get everybody into the river and down to the other end that he didn't bother to tie people's tubes together. You were instructed to hold onto the handles of the two people on either side of you, which left me with an aching back and neck at the end (it was about 40 min from entry into the water to where we got out) because I couldn't find a way to hold onto DH and DS's tubes and still be comfortable.

The way the excursion read when we booked it was that there would be a short hike (maybe 15 min), 30-45 min of cave tubing and then lunch. Well...we didn't get lunch until nearly 4 pm that day (we'd eaten at around 7:30 am) and we were all very hungry. DS (who is normally primarily vegetarian and typically eats like a bird) ate everything on his plate and tried to eat some of my food too. Including the "jerk chicken" which he normally wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole.

We always book our excursions through the ship so that if we end up being late (we were..ship was scheduled to leave at 5, we didn't get back till after 6 pm I think) the ship cannot leave without us. THIS kind of thing is exactly why we do that.

Carnival though, to their credit, did more than make up for this little disaster. We were refunded the price of our excursion and our liason at guest services was absolutely horrified when we told her what happened. She managed to get us a tour of the navigational bridge, a book about the ship (which was signed by the captain) AND a stuffed monkey from Camp Carnival for DS.