Posted February 2nd, 2005, 11:15 AM
As an employee with Celebrity, I am happy to answer your questions and provide a more accurate depiction of what one might expect on a cruise.
I know someone has posted something similar to this already, but as I still work for Celebrity, I am more up to date on the Celebrity Cruise experience.
In this cynical age, in the interest of fellow board members, we need you to pass a test to confirm your real X employee status. ONLY an ACTUAL X employee could know the answers. This is only a test, and if there had been an actual alert, you would have been instructed to tune in your EBS channels.
1. Which cruiseline has higher food and service quality: RCL or X?
2. What is the average number of X breadsticks consumed by a female CpnClub elite member at dinner?
3. Do X cabin staff (vigilantes?) keep a "dust-bunny' reserve to intentionally place under the beds of 'difficult' cruisers in order to drive them away? Has it become a game among colleagues to plant dust-bunnies at random to see if the cabin steward catches on?
4. In compensating for pets not being allowed, has the ship's staff given fond names like 'Spot' to animal-shaped carpet stains?
5. Is there a staff betting pool on how many pax can be crammed in to a ship's tender at one time? Are there record high's that newer staff are shooting for?
6. Does staff sometimes slip extra chemicals into the T-pool as prankish fun to see the effect on pax bathing suits? Are there bonus points if the suit actually disintegrates from their body as they leave?
7. Was intro of 'topless' sunbathing area on X male staff's idea?
8. Are the DR wait staff the strongest proponents for X's formal attire in the hopes that more pax would behave politely?
9. What's the name of that little fleshy dangling thing that hangs down from the back of a person's mouth?
Only if you can dazzle this board with correct responses that only an actual X staff would know can we have full faith and confidence in your competency.
OK - the clock is ticking. Hey - no coaching from the board.