Dumbest Questions Asked

[mbjboyle]

I'm infatuated with stupid questions people ask while on a cruise. For some reason, the moment some step foot aboard a ship they lose their rational thought process.
I overheard a cruiser request to speak with the captain to tell him to, "move the boat because the seas are too rough and I don't want to spill my wine."
There's always the list of questions presented by the CD, and I believe each should be printed at Guest Services reminding passengers what not to ask. However, please add to this thread the dumbest, most ridiculous question and/or request you have had the pleasure of over-hearing aboard. Thanks!

What time is the midnight buffet?
Are there beaches on the island?
Is the island totally surrounded by water?
Will this elevator take me to the front of the ship?
Is the water in the pool rough because it's seawater?
Does the ship generate its own electricity?
Does the crew live onboard?
How much are the tickets for the tender?
How can I tell which pictures are ours?
Do these steps go up or down?
Is the water in the toilet fresh or salt water?
Do we have to go to the mandatory lifeboat drill?
Will the DJ play music in the disco?
Do you grow your own food onboard?
What do you do with the ice carvings after they've melted?
What temperature are the ice cubes kept at?

[ThatGuy86]

While waiting for a drink at the bar on Half Moon Cay (Holland America Line's private island), a younger gentlemen walked into the bar and asked "Where are the local bars?"

[CruisingBuzzMan]

On NCL to the Dinning Host, Why didn't we get a table assignment and a dinning time. Dah!!!!!!

[mr green]

Originally Posted by mbjboyle

I'm infatuated with stupid questions people ask while on a cruise. For some reason, the moment some step foot aboard a ship they lose their rational thought process.
I overheard a cruiser request to speak with the captain to tell him to, "move the boat because the seas are too rough and I don't want to spill my wine."
There's always the list of questions presented by the CD, and I believe each should be printed at Guest Services reminding passengers what not to ask. However, please add to this thread the dumbest, most ridiculous question and/or request you have had the pleasure of over-hearing aboard. Thanks!

What time is the midnight buffet?
Are there beaches on the island?
Is the island totally surrounded by water?
Will this elevator take me to the front of the ship?
Is the water in the pool rough because it's seawater?
Does the ship generate its own electricity?
Does the crew live onboard?
How much are the tickets for the tender?
How can I tell which pictures are ours?
Do these steps go up or down?
Is the water in the toilet fresh or salt water?
Do we have to go to the mandatory lifeboat drill?
Will the DJ play music in the disco?
Do you grow your own food onboard?
What do you do with the ice carvings after they've melted?
What temperature are the ice cubes kept at?

Dare I ask it? Did you sleep with a Cruise Directer to get those questions?

john

[gtouch]

"What would happen if we hit an iceburg?".........we were on a Carribean cruise.

[mr green]

Originally Posted by gtouch

"What would happen if we hit an iceburg?".........we were on a Carribean cruise.

Was there a very poor navigator working the ship???

john

[mbjboyle]

Originally Posted by mr green

Dare I ask it? Did you sleep with a Cruise Directer to get those questions?

john

Some from the usual list the CD uses on each cruise. Some from others' suggestions.

[GifferI]

During the muster drill aboard Navigator of the Seas:

Why would we need a life vest if we are getting in to the lifeboats?


That is a question I hope to never find the answer to!

[mr green]

Returning from life boat drill one time, we were instructed NOT to take our life jackets off for safety reasons, 'til we got back to our cabins.
A sweet young thing came up to me in a passage way, and asked. 'Will you please read my cabin number for me, as I don't know where to go?'

john

[don'tleavewithoutme]

While going through locks at Panama Canal, a fellow passenger asked me, "Why do we have to do this?"

[freshprincess]

When cruising in Alaska, I was so enchanted by the snowcapped peaks and glaciers around us while getting off the ship that I asked "what elevation are we at?"

[vabchtraveler]

My favorite from the cruise director library 'Does the ship have cable or satellite tv?'

[Cupcrazy]

Sounds like a skit by all the Cruise Directors on all the Carnival ships I've taken. Always funny

[geospyder]

Originally Posted by freshprincess

When cruising in Alaska, I was so enchanted by the snowcapped peaks and glaciers around us while getting off the ship that I asked "what elevation are we at?"

I have to admit this had me laughing - after thinking for a second how high Alaska was - duhhh

[Moto Guzzi]

Originally Posted by freshprincess

When cruising in Alaska, I was so enchanted by the snowcapped peaks and glaciers around us while getting off the ship that I asked "what elevation are we at?"

When I went on my Alaskan cruise, somebody asked that question. My roommate didn't know why I thought that was funny and asked me, "Well, what elevation ARE we at?"

[Mistyhon]

Originally Posted by Moto Guzzi

When I went on my Alaskan cruise, somebody asked that question. My roommate didn't know why I thought that was funny and asked me, "Well, what elevation ARE we at?"

I'm laughing so hard right now I think I woke up my son. It's only that funny to me because I had to think about it for a minute and then the lightbulb turned on...."Drrrrr...you're at sea level!"

[topkatz]

We just got on the forward port side elevator on deck 8 (pool deck) and noticed that the floor of the elevator was very wet, someone had failed to dry off before returning to their cabin. The elevator floor was marble and with the water, it constituted a slip hazard.

We stopped by the reception desk on deck 4 to let them know and recommend that it be cleaned up before someone got hurt.

The exchange went like this...
Us: "We just got off the forward port side elevator and there is a significant amount of water on floor of the elevator. You should have someone clean it be before a guest slips and falls on it."
Receptionist asked with a straight face, "What deck is the elevator on?".
Us: "Forward elevator, port side."
Receptionist: "Ok, what floor is is on?".
Us: "It was on deck four when we got off, the elevator could be on any deck now. The forward elevator, port side. Someone could slip and hurt themselves on the wet floor."
Receptionist: "Ok, but what floor is it on?"
Us: "It's an elevator. It may be on any floor."
Receptionist: "Oh, ok, thanks."

Not sure the receptionist ever really got the point.

[mr green]

Some years ago we ran into a single gentleman from our part of the world, who, unfortunately did not seem 'quite right'.
On the first day he told us that he could not get cold water from his tap, after running it for ten minutes, and on second day he asked us to 'Come and listen to my toilet, it does not sound right'. We declined, and thankfully were able to avoid him after that.

john

[planma'am]

Originally Posted by Moto Guzzi

When I went on my Alaskan cruise, somebody asked that question. My roommate didn't know why I thought that was funny and asked me, "Well, what elevation ARE we at?"

Laughing so hard, had to share with DH. His response: And these people are allowed to reproduce!!!