Louise D

Hello again Pepperrn, Roscoe39, Fantasy51 and Maggiemou,

It is nice to hear from a few old friends at Cruise Critic, and reminisce about the Cunard we enjoyed in the days of the QE2 and the newer ships in the early 2000s.

I will pass on your good wishes to Whitemarsh - we remain fast friends but we both have other interests and commitments now that don't leave time for cruising.

Maggiemou - it is great that you are still cruising on QE and wearing your colourful fashions. I do recall the lady you mentioned who often mentioned her dancing abilities prior to the cruise. I say no more - other than to note that there are some very eccentric characters to be found on Cunard ships.

Miss the Cunard Fashion Police? Be still my fluttering heart.

As has been observed in other threads, the Cunard practices as to the level of formality in dress seem to have dropped markedly since the 2014 World Cruises. The number of formal nights has been significantly decreased, and the staff on board the ships seem to have become more tolerant of dress code flouters.

Some of the more astute of you may have noticed that Whitemarsh and I stopped posting around the time of the above change. This was not a coincidence. Unwilling to directly challenge us and in order to get the changes through, Cunard sent a swat team to capture us both at the end of the 2014 world cruises and then consigned us to eternal purgatory in the notorious cabin 8129 adjacent to the ladies and gents toilets on deck 8 of the QM2.

For the next 12 months we were confined in that abysmal hole, and forced to dine on endless rations of smoked salmon, caviar, the best French champagne and chocolate truffles. I believe it was Cunard’s intention that Whitemarsh and I would become morbidly obese, lose the use of our limbs, no longer fit any of our high fashion garments, fall into despair and expire. I am sure that they planned that one dark night, in a heavy swell, we would be rolled overboard.

Yet we triumphed against their evil machinations. Calling in aid “Rosalind” and the spirit of “Sir Martin” we bewitched our steward into providing us with the necessary ingredients for a fatal brew. This brew required 10 crates of Pol Acker, 5 large bottles of “Lady Gaga – Fame” perfume (eeeek), a hundredweight of rotten lobster carcases, and the sparklers from 150 bombe alaskas. Mixing the heady brew and then setting it alight with the sparklers was accomplished in a trice, and we then directed the fumes into the air conditioning ducts leading from cabin 8129 straight to the Bridge.

Within 5 minutes of despatch of the fumes, terrible groans and curses reverberated through the air conditioning ducts and the voice of the Captain could clearly be heard, demanding the source of the foul stench be investigated. We heard the sound of running feet coming up the corridor and stop outside the door to the cabin.

I won’t go into detail of all that was said (we have signed a confidentiality agreement) but the upshot was that because of the dreadful stench we had created, (and the fact that we had consumed all the caviar and French champagne on board), Cunard agreed to release us from our confinement and drop us off at the next port.

However, as part of the negotiated deal for our release, we had to agree to never travel on a Cunard ship again.

So there ends the tale of Whitemarsh and Louise D and the Cunard Fashion Police.

Sic transit finis aetatis

Diamonds.

... are a girl's best friend.

Especially when worn on board a Cunard ship and in association with a ball gown or two.

Hi Louise, how long before the requested port did you ask them and can you tell me what the process is?

I requested it at the time of booking with Cunard about six weeks prior to sailing. It took about 1 or 2 days for Cunard to get back to me with the approval.

What about getting off (debarking) before your segment officially ends? I thought I remembered someone saying that their debarkation point was Shanghai, but they needed to get off prior to that and just let the pursers office know and they were allowed to get off.

Yes, I have done that on QM2, but Cunard needs to get prior approval from the local authorities before they can confirm it. Obviously the price is the same as if you do the whole voyage.

My only line up at the Pursers desk, and indeed the person in front of me was there to remove his auto tip.

I went to the Purser's Desk to pay the auto-tips in cash in advance, but as soon as they heard me say a sentence with the word "tip" included in it, they assumed I wanted to remove the auto-tip. They filled in all sorts of papers and handed them to me to sign. I read the papers and pointed out I was not there to remove the auto-tip but to pay it in cash. The woman looked at me strangely and apologised. She said that if they hear the word "tip" they automatically assume it is another request to remove the auto-tip.

Make of this what you will.

No - you are wrong again.

 

What I have antipathy towards is snobbishness and pomposity - something which I have found in abundance in this particular CC sub-forum but which I have found absent onboard Cunard ships.

 

Barry

We need to make an exception for Bazzaw since he is an ex-submariner and I can understand why he does not find dress issues to be important. I was reading an article in The Guardian which describes submariners as "hugging cruise missiles in their sleep, they don't see women for months and their biggest fear is 'going wibble' (stir crazy).

It is more interesting to me that Bazzaw wishes to cruise at all. I would have thought the whole cruising scene would have been too tame for him.

This is a fascinating discussion. Please keep it going!

 

Having traveled on the original QE2 in a mid-range first class accommodation back in the very early days and moved both up and down since, I am old enough to cringe at the modern prices and the changes in what goes for service.

 

I always like to recall Mr. Roger Donaldson, chief wine steward, who stood a few feet from my table and kindly and patiently taught me about wines. An old Cunarder, he was kind and sympathic to a young woman who had no knowledge of the world of wines.

 

I was one of the many is the USA who hosted him on his retirement grand tour of our country before he went back to England for his retirement in (what must have been) about 1978.

 

And as I am a small person who does not entertain on board, PG is my choice for travel. The thought of a creepy butler is more than I can stand.

I have not come across any creepy butlers and in fact I found the butler to be particularly helpful in regard to some of the unpublished extras such as arranging crew members to carry all my copious hand luggage for me and assist me through disembarkation, where Cunard then had various other personnel ready to take all my suitcases and hand luggage through Customs and down to a waiting car, so that I did not need to touch any of my luggage at all.

I don't think that Cunard could have done a better job even in the days of first class travel on the old Queen Mary.

Despite being quite breathtakingly lovable, I wasn't deemed sufficiently likeable even to get into QG.

 

Neither is Mr Cruachan, but he doesn't know it yet.

 

Sir Martin

Sir Martin, I am sure you are breathtakingly lovely. All cats are. If you really want to experience the delights of QG, hop into your crate and ask your amanuensis to deliver yourself to Southampton Docks on 10 January where all will be revealed.

My husband and I have done multiple sailings in Queens Grill on both the QE2 and QM2. However, if there are "unpublished QG flourishes" I am unaware of them. I would also be quite upset to have sailed in QG (and paid for that level) and not have been told about any additional benefits. In fact, it makes no sense to me that there would be "unpublished" benefits to QG. Why would they be unpublished? Wouldn't it make more sense to Cunard to publish them and thereby give people more incentive to book QG?

The unpublished extras are offered to repeat passengers who have good rapport with the crew and are frequently offered at that crew member's own instigation because they actually like you and want you to return again. So of course these extras are not going to become standard offerings or published in the brochures. Further, they are more of special, one-off arrangements particular to the passenger concerned, such as keeping records of his or her likes or dislikes, forwarding them to other Cunard ships in the fleet to ensure corresponding crew are aware of these things before they board on the next voyage, to smooth their way etc.

I love how you make design "your own"

How can one describe your term " carnival pseudo art deco?"

what does it mean?:(

Thank you for your words of praise. Carnival pseudo art deco is best illustrated by thinking of the way the QM2 is decorated in the common passages leading to the Britannia restaurant on Decks 2 and 3.

It is a modern reinterpretation of art deco. If you have studied the amazing décor on the QM as originally launched in 1936, which I have been privileged to do, then you will readily see the difference between that original style and what we can see on board the QM2.

That's very kind of you Louise D, but then you are always so very kind and free of sarcasm!

 

Edited to add: And so very subtle in your remarks - must have taken years to develope that skill:D! Cheers! -S

Thanks Salacia,

However, I defer to your unparalleled abilities in consistently and sincerely maintaining the moral tone of rectitude, caring and compassion which you have brought to this Board in your 5000+ posts in the last three years. ;)

Louise

:eek:Just to clarifly: I meant that the nicest way (I think Turquoise knows that, but just in case others didn't).

Salacia, I think that by now we all know that absolutely everything you say is meant in the nicest possible way.

Louise,

 

I didn't think anything could be as funny your 'man's underwear on your balcony' story, but this one darn near comes very close.:D:D

 

 

 

Wow.. and some people think that the majority of QM2 passengers are old......:eek:

 

You are a very nice person, Louise. I hope when I am older and more senile than I am now and sailing on the QM2, you are also sailing along. :)

 

 

 

 

Crazy Kathleen Turner. Leg of lamb. :eek: White shoes.

 

The three things that come to mind when that film is mentioned.

 

When I was young...decades and decades ago...a young lady never wore white after Labor Day. The older women were very strict about this rule,

they would make the Cunard Fashion Police look like wimps! :D

 

best regards,

seasidegal

You are quite right about white. I only wear it during the height of our Australian Summer, or on board a ship in the Tropics.

I also hope that I am still cruising for a long time to come, but realistically, Cunard ships are no longer the place to go for old people looking to find companionship. On the QE2, there used to be a large group of widows and widowers who met up on the world cruise every year and in fact they used to look after each other and go about in groups together and visit each other's cabins during the day for chats. QE2 became a floating retirement home for a significant percentage of the world cruisers.

I don't see this happening on board Cunard ships anymore, partly due to the lack of single cabins, and also that Cunard is a lot stricter now regarding the health requirements of the passengers and the fact they will not allow the stewards to act as nursemaids in the way they used to do on the QE2.

Also, sad to say, but most of the generation of old people who were travelling on QE2 when I first started cruising are either dead now or very frail and not travelling. This particular generation seemed to me very unselfish, as most had lived through very turbulent times. It was natural for them to look after each other. I don't see the same qualities in the older people I see on Cunard ships now.

Louise, did you every see this woman again? It would have been most uncomfortable if you crossed paths a second time.

 

Fancy her yelling "you will all be sorry". :D Maybe she was referring to those poor unfortunates on her table?

Thankfully, I never saw that particular "lady" again. I expect that soon after she expired from the oppressive heat in her Four or Five Deck inside cabin. I believe she was probably crazy from lack of sleep as it is well known that when in the Tropics, the air-conditioning on QE2 did not work properly in the cabins on the lower decks.

I used to see them all lining up in the Purser's office, demanding a change of cabin because they could get no sleep in the tropical heat.

Oh, that's a great one! I've even got an image of the disgruntled woman in my mind :)

 

In hindsight you should have turned back and glared at her, before stating 'Madam, if you persist I will lock you in the brig or throw you overboard.' Or you could have threatened to downgrade her stateroom.

 

I know it would have made things worse, but at least it would have been funny to watch her fume longer.

It was not long before I worked out that most of the passengers on board the world cruise on QE2 were half-crazy, largely due to senile deterioration, so I had to treat them accordingly. I spent a lot of time giving directions. There were quite a few passengers on board who should have not been there, as they seemed to have little idea of where they were. Their children had put them on board the world cruise so that they could get rid of them for a time. Cunard would not accept them as passengers now. I used to worry that some of them would go ashore and not be able to find their way back on board. From time to time if some of the more debilitated asked me for directions to go ashore, I would instead direct them to the Queens Room and hope they would stay put there until we sailed.

In those days, there were no young people on board. Even the crew thought I was the crew. Therefore, it is not surprising all the passengers thought I was also crew.

 

On the subject of attire, I cannot count how many times I was mistaken for a crew member throughout the voyage. Actually, I can count: it was six times. The first time I was wearing a lot of black, so I assume I was mistaken for a technician or something equivalent. On another occasion, an elderly lady asked me for another cocktail. When I suggested (politely) that she should ask the bar staff, she apologised in a great deal of embarrassment. Apparently I am young looking and therefore that somehow means I must work on board. Another time I was asked for a glass of hot water. As I was recounting this rather unusual request at dinner, a tablemate quipped that I should have apologised and stated ‘I am sorry madam, but I only pour cold water. You will need to find a hot water attendant.’ Now, while this elicited raucous laughter from everyone, I am sure in the heyday of ocean liner travel such a job likely existed.

 

In one of the lifts (elevator) I was asked, while wearing formal wear, whether the Norovirus situation had eased and whether everything could go back to normal. I replied that I had no idea and that I imagined the Captain would announce something the following day. The gentleman apologised, claiming he thought I was an officer! I really am unsure how he assumed that. I certainly was not wearing a uniform. A tablemate suggested that perhaps people sensed authority in me. I’m not sure, but the endless case of mistaken identity provided many interesting conversation starters at dinner.

 

At least the requests made of you were fairly reasonable….

In contrast, I recall certain events on board QE2 while traversing the South China Sea in February 2002.

The Scene

QE2, Quarter Deck, portside, adjacent the Library and Book Shop.

Characters

Myself – a young and inexperienced first-time cruiser, having made a fatal mistake of wearing a white two-piece ensemble

The Widow – A denizen of the QE2, of indeterminate years between 75 and death.

The Conversation

The Widow – You, young woman, take note of what I am saying.

Myself – Sorry?

The Widow – I am still totally dissatisfied.

Myself – I am sorry to hear it.

The Widow – So what are you going to do about it?

Myself – I don’t know what you mean.

The Widow – It is just not big enough.

Myself – What?

The Widow – I can barely turn around.

Myself – Do I know you?

The Widow – I have been down to see you people at least five times already.

Myself – Are you quite sure?

The Widow – Of course I am sure. And it is too dark and hot as well.

Myself – Too dark and hot? But it is only 10am.

The Widow – Don’t try to change the subject. I demand you take me to see Commodore Warwick so I can have it out with him. My late husband would never have put up with this.

Myself – I don’t know the Commodore

The Widow – Oh yes you do, you’re one of THEM

Myself – One of THEM?

The Widow – Yes, one of those Pursers from Two Deck, you can’t hide from me.

Myself – I assure you I am not one of them.

The Widow – You must be. You are wearing the outfit.

Myself – I am sorry, you are mistaken. I really cannot help you. (Starts walking away quickly)

The Widow – (Shouting) Don’t think you can leave me like this. I know where you work. I am not staying in that cabin a moment longer. I am going to suffocate and die in there. You will all be sorry. I DEMAND to see the Commodore.

The Moral of the Story

(1) Never wear an all-white ensemble on board a Cunard ship.

(2) Avoid making eye contact with roving widows of indeterminate years.

(3) Things were NOT always better on the QE2.

.

 

So nice to kick back in the Queens Grill lounge with a cigarette and a gin & tonic afterwards.

 

Yes, it is so nice the way that Cunard lets our humble foot soldiers indulge their harmless vices on board. A little bending of the rules never did go astray (as long as the rules being bent are not those set out in the Dress Code).

I wonder who........!:D:D:D

Fashion Police operatives must maintain their anonymity at all times in order to catch the miscreants unawares. We will have a considerable number of operatives on board QE during the world cruise. Several new recruits are currently in training.

I presently have my hands full writing a handbook dealing specifically with the vexed issue of the wearing of kilts.

Horror stories abound of passengers, five days into a 10 night cruise, and still wandering the ship searching for their cabin! :D

 

I always felt that Cunard should have provided all QE2 passengers with an emergency ration pack, a map and a compass before they came on board.

 

Oh, call me paranoid if you will, but the lifts didn't like me! All I had to do was to press a button and the lift in question instantly ceased to function.

 

And Carnival call their vessels "fun ships". What do they know!?

 

J

On my first voyage on QE2, the second night out, I had my hands full with a seriously seasick mother, who was in desperate need of the attentions of the medical centre. Of course there was only one lift that actually went down to the medical centre. Could I find it? I don't know how many people I had to ask for directions.

Even on my last trip on QE2, when coming back from the tenders, I ended up in a totally new area of the ship I had never been before, somewhere near the back of the Mauretania restaurant, with a staircase I had never seen before.

Glojo - response to your questions in black type below:-

It is nice to hear folks confirming what we say and what are the thoughts of those that sailed on both the old trans-Atlantic Queens and the Queen Elizabeth 2?

Unfortunately I am not of sufficient years to have sailed on QM, but I agree with you below about the QE2 being a hybrid cruise ship and liner.

Was the QE2 a significant step forward regarding its interior design\layout? The original ships were out and out ferries designed for a scheduled route across an area of ocean that at times was not the most pleasant of places to be and I am assuming individual balconies were not high on the list of required features. The QE2 however was more of a cruise ship as opposed to the 'ferry' that had a type of weekly trans-Atlantic service and as such passengers might want their own individual, private area in which to sun bath.

The QE2 was significant in that most of the public rooms were placed in the centre of the ship, with wide walkways and windows each side. Thus one could promenade inside the ship in bad weather. I actually liked this layout and rather miss it on QM2.

There were few cabins on QE2 that had their own balcony. Most such cabins were the "dox-boxes" (Q2s) added up on the Signal and Sun Decks and were not part of the original plans for the ship. When the QE2 was built, there was not this mania for balconies. Some Q1 cabins on QE2 had no balcony, including that behind the QG restaurant that was converted from the old radio room.

Did the QE2 carry on with the very traditional wooden interior design styling of her older sisters or did she make her own statement and have a more modern looking interior?

Some parts of QE2 retained original wooden interiors, particularly the QG cabins on One and Two Deck. However, most of the public rooms were of a less traditional style, from the Princess Grill (60s) to the Yacht Club (70s) to the Chart Room (80s) style. Some rooms had no defined style at all.

I must confess that I dislike with a passion this so called 'Art Deco' type styling brrrrr I totally accept some folks like it and here I am having booked a cruise aboard the Queen Elizabeth. In my defence, all the pictures I have seen of this ship's interior look very nice but how does it compare to the other two more traditional ships? Is the interior theming of the Queen Victoria similar to that of the Queen Mary 2?

I agree that I am not a fan of recent reinterpretations of "art deco".

I think we have had some excellent discussions about liners vs cruise ships and what a great pity the latest two 'smaller' Queens do not have a similar styled bow to that of all their predecessors. It would most certainly make them more comfortable in adverse sea conditions and also possibly the best designed cruise ships for their size?

I agree that the two smaller Queens would have been better designed with a more streamlined hull form. But this would have caused additional design cost, which Cunard apparently did not wish to pay.

I am genuinely looking forward to listening to both Louise and is it the head of the Fashion Police who will also be accompanying us on our cruise aboard the newest member of the Cunard fleet? I do note how one of them has 'bottled out' of the first leg of the upcoming trip which is that crossing of the North Atlantic.:D;) (apologies for my teasing type humour)

Having dealt firmly with the fashion miscreants on QM2, the Fashion Police will indeed be turning their attention to QE. We have assigned various operatives to different sectors of the next world cruise.

On a different forum folks that have cruised on all three Cunard ships have mostly rated the smaller vessels as being better laid out, and having better interior designs, but on this forum the Queen Mary 2 tends to come out on top?

For those interested in naval architecture, there is no doubt that the QM2 will always be considered the better ship of the three current Cunard vessels.

It's art déco.

I think perhaps Carnival pseudo art déco. It is a long way from the 1930s liners Normandie or the original Queen Mary in style.

But, seen from across the water, was there ever a better looking ship than QE2? :) .

No. The QE2 is the closest I have come to falling "in love" with an inanimate object! From every angle, she was mesmerising. Her design team were truly masters of their art.

The Queen Mary might not be as fast as the QE2 but on just about everything else ism she a better ship? She is without any shadow of a doubt a better sea going vessel, a more stable vessel and might I suggest she is more luixurious?

 

QM2 is a better sea-going vessel than QE2 and also far more stable. The only operational aspect in which QE2 was significantly better than QM2 was in relation to speed.

Both ships could be described as comfortable and elegant, although in completely different ways. At least QM2 has a generally consistent style throughout the ship, although I have difficulty in actually putting a name to the style sought to be achieved by the designer.

While QE2 was originally styled in a 60s look, by the end of her career with Cunard, QE2 had so many styles going on that it became a game of "spot the style" in the different rooms whenever one was on board.

That skirt is about the width of a Britannia inside cabin - and how would one manage to get through the cabin door and along the corridors when wearing it?

Nevertheless, it would provide some protection against falling over in rough sea conditions - it appears to stand up by itself.

I otherwise do agree that a costume ball would be a good idea.

I think I understand what you are saying but I can imagine our more politically correct brigade having issues ;)

 

 

I guess you want to both monitor and control the standard of dress and give your exterminators the wink should you detect anyone that dares to transgress :) (humour)

An interesting description of Whitemarsh's travelling party, although dangerous as "Fashion Exterminators" gives the wrong impression entirely.

I agree that clear lines of sight would be crucial to carrying out the important tasks entrusted to the group, and therefore close attention would need to be paid to table selection.

On Cunard ships I have been on tables with singles and couples and have always found congenial company with the other ladies on the table (married and single) to go to the theatre, afternoon tea, trivia etc. Most of the ladies who are married actually enjoy getting away from their husbands from time to time and spending time with other ladies.

Also, on Cunard ships it is not hard to be anonymous if you want time alone.

But, if you do not like time alone, I would recommend smaller ships such as Silversea ships. Even though sometimes on Silverseas ships I have planned to dine alone for a change, or go to afternoon tea alone, usually I get spotted by one of the other passengers or a couple and asked to join them. On tour buses, I always find I know some of the other passengers on the bus. This does not really happen on Cunard. On smaller ships you do get well known by many passengers, especially if you are on board a fortnight or so.