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Friends of Dorothy


Growlr
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Haven't noticed any LGBT or FoD meetings on any of the cruises I've been but have seen the Friends of Bill W meeting regularly (though never actually knew what it was until I read this post, every day's a school day.) Was on Azura last week & that definitely had at least one Friends of Bill W meeting remember reading it in the Horizon.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Having sailed the majority of the cruise lines, our first P&O has been booked for January out of Barbados. We appreciate the comments regarding FOD meetings for we tend to request at least one on our journeys and from your comments will do so when aboard. Beyond our preference for FOD over LGBTQ2 (soon to include Tom, Dick and Harry - LGBTQ2TDH) what ever happened to "GAY"? Universal, concise and fabulous.

To the comments regarding P&O's traditional sailaway, is that conducted only out of the port of Southampton? Sounds like a real treat to me.

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Having sailed the majority of the cruise lines, our first P&O has been booked for January out of Barbados. We appreciate the comments regarding FOD meetings for we tend to request at least one on our journeys and from your comments will do so when aboard. Beyond our preference for FOD over LGBTQ2 (soon to include Tom, Dick and Harry - LGBTQ2TDH) what ever happened to "GAY"? Universal, concise and fabulous.

To the comments regarding P&O's traditional sailaway, is that conducted only out of the port of Southampton? Sounds like a real treat to me.

The Great British Sailaway (with singing, dancing, pims and raucous xenophobic flag waving) is usually the last port before Southampton on the way home. It is especially fabulous if there is an American ship alongside we can direct all this good humour towards. :p

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I wish the meetings were arranged for 'LGBT and allies' because I'd like to go on the basis that it's usually the source of the best company onboard [emoji2] I might put that add in the Horizon on our next trip!

 

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I do not see why anyone of any sexual orientation cannot attend. Can you imagine running a meeting and trying to exclude LBGT people? So why would one assume a LGBT meeting would discriminate against anyone else attending on the basis of their not being any of the LGBT types? Would disabled people be allowed to attend for example?

 

Regards John

Edited by john watson
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The Great British Sailaway (with singing, dancing, pims and raucous xenophobic flag waving) is usually the last port before Southampton on the way home. It is especially fabulous if there is an American ship alongside we can direct all this good humour towards. :p

 

Many many years ago when living in Vancouver I attended a sailaway of a P&O ship destined for the Orient. It was absolutely amazing. Brass band, streamers by the thousands connecting ship to dock with many more people in the stands than there were passengers. As a spectator I noticed two gals at the ship’s railing who obviously had no one ashore to see them off. So I filled in by drawing their attention and waving. It took a moment for them to realize what I was doing, had no idea who I was but were delighted to be drawn into the ceremony. When the ship pulled away from the dock to the snapping of the streamers the band played “We’ll Meat Again” and there wasn’t a dry eyed in the house.

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  • 3 months later...
When I was on Aurora a couple of years back, I was told P&O doesn't like 'Friends of Dorothy' as it's discriminatory! If you want something in the daily magazine, probably worth asking for LGBT+ instead.

I totally agree, it is discriminatory and in this day and age outdated and needless. Who cares if anyone is LGBT !

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I totally agree, it is discriminatory and in this day and age outdated and needless. Who cares if anyone is LGBT !

 

 

I think it was the terminology which is discriminatory as opposed to the events, which are valued by LGBT just the same as any group organising an event.

I would love to say that nobody cares about LGBT, but when on was on Princess I had the misfortune to see a trans woman being ridiculed by two passengers and a female crew member was joining in. We can never be complacent and believe discrimination doesn’t exist, because whilst you and I may just see people there are many who don’t. ☹️

 

 

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General question now.. what are the specifics on hosted vs. non-hosted.

 

I would have thought that non-hosted usually meant it was a get together requested by a fellow passenger, whearas hosted is something the ship arranged in advance.

ie. non-hosted knitting or hosted whist.

 

A hosted meeting or event will have a member of the crew or ents team in attendance running or overseeing the meeting. A non-hosted meeting or event will not have a member of the crew or ents team in attendance.

 

The meeting or event might be convened by the cruise line and advertised in the daily newsletter with or without audible announcements as well. This may be as a result of a passenger group or individual requesting such a meeting or alternatively the cruise line may decide it should run an event anyway as a general passenger benefit.

 

Non-hosted events will involve whosoever attending deciding how the group should proceed by general discussion and agreement and then carry on from there. Items required such as playing cards and tables for example will be made available. A number of staff might be there too, such as people coming round offering coffee, tea etc. but they will not be conducting affairs. On a recent cruise I found solo travellers coffee mornings had hosts running the meeting on sea days and coffee being served. On port days only a venue and time was advertised and declared as non-hosted. Nobody turned up, I just had a look in and I assumed the background to this was that on previous cruises these were not well attended so it was just left for passengers to see how it went. If you find yourself at non hosted events which are daily and things are not running smoothly a word at reception will assist if you can identify what is needed.

 

Regards John

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I wish the meetings were arranged for 'LGBT and allies' because I'd like to go on the basis that it's usually the source of the best company onboard [emoji2] I might put that add in the Horizon on our next trip!

They now list them as LGBTQ

Apparently Q stands for Questioning !

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They now list them as LGBTQ

Apparently Q stands for Questioning !

 

 

 

More commonly Q stands for Queer which apparently is now seen as a more positive title than in my youth when it was seen as extremely derogatory [emoji1] Personally I don’t wish to be known as ‘queer’ I hate that term.

 

Don’t forget the ‘I’ in LGBTQI which includes ‘intersex’ people or gender fluid.

 

Actually I think it’s getting out of hand.

 

 

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More commonly Q stands for Queer which apparently is now seen as a more positive title than in my youth when it was seen as extremely derogatory [emoji1] Personally I don’t wish to be known as ‘queer’ I hate that term.

 

Don’t forget the ‘I’ in LGBTQI which includes ‘intersex’ people or gender fluid.

 

Actually I think it’s getting out of hand.

 

 

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Running out of letters too! I believe they have now added an X! Who do these people think they are using up all of our alphabet to try and find which slot they belong too. It's beyond a joke.

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Running out of letters too! I believe they have now added an X! Who do these people think they are using up all of our alphabet to try and find which slot they belong too. It's beyond a joke.

 

I do not see any reason they need to add letters to the basic originals. One can see the type of meeting being convened. In this respect I do not see any reason that a straight person or even an inter-racial couple celebrating their diamond wedding anniversary should not attend, provided they are not turning up to disrupt things. I am assuming that everybody attending does not discriminate against straight people.

 

Regards John

Edited by john watson
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More commonly Q stands for Queer which apparently is now seen as a more positive title than in my youth when it was seen as extremely derogatory [emoji1] Personally I don’t wish to be known as ‘queer’ I hate that term.

 

Don’t forget the ‘I’ in LGBTQI which includes ‘intersex’ people or gender fluid.

 

Actually I think it’s getting out of hand.

 

 

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I pretty much agree with all your sentiments there.

 

I suppose the point I would like to make (purely in my own opinion and experience) is that if you are LGBT etc, etc, even today it can still feel that you are in a very small minority. Before his death in 2012 my partner & I sailed on numerous cruises as an open - but not outrageously so - couple and never experienced any difficulties with other pax. Despite that, it was always nice when there was an 'FoD' meeting on board to socialise with a few others 'in the same boat' as it were :D. I personally would be happy for it to be an LGBT etc etc and allies meeting. I now sail solo at times and so find myself in a double minority! At least most of the lines I sail on arrange meetings for solo pax.

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I don't think that you are really out of touch I first came across the term while working in USA. I have rarely heard "Friends of Dorothy" used for LGBT community in the UK but it is widely used in USA and Canada. I don't remember ever seeing Friends of Dorothy meeting advertised in the Horizon on P&O but they are always advertised on American ships.

 

 

 

They are a feature on Carnival Cruises and Royal Caribbean

 

 

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More commonly Q stands for Queer which apparently is now seen as a more positive title than in my youth when it was seen as extremely derogatory [emoji1] Personally I don’t wish to be known as ‘queer’ I hate that term.

 

Don’t forget the ‘I’ in LGBTQI which includes ‘intersex’ people or gender fluid.

 

Actually I think it’s getting out of hand.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I agree with your sentiments Pete. I remember when it was just "Gay", an umbrella term which encompased all those attracted to their own sex. It was much simpler and easily understood and said all that needed to be said.

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I agree with your sentiments Pete. I remember when it was just "Gay", an umbrella term which encompased all those attracted to their own sex. It was much simpler and easily understood and said all that needed to be said.

 

Absolutely!! They don't need all those pigeon-holes.

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I agree with your sentiments Pete. I remember when it was just "Gay", an umbrella term which encompased all those attracted to their own sex. It was much simpler and easily understood and said all that needed to be said.

 

Ah - but then we have a problem as transgender people are not necessarily attracted to the same sex. I do however agree that things need to stop somewhere and LGBT seems to me the most logical place to stop.

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My partner and I cruise a lot and we've never had an issue, quite the opposite most of the time but we loved the term 'friends of Dorothy', we were thrilled when we got to go to a FoD meeting RCI many years ago. There's just something 'nice' about it - surely it can't be offensive to anyone?? It was fun listening to old / straight people try to work out who Dorothy was and why she had so many friends on board.......

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I do not see any reason they need to add letters to the basic originals. One can see the type of meeting being convened. In this respect I do not see any reason that a straight person or even an inter-racial couple celebrating their diamond wedding anniversary should not attend, provided they are not turning up to disrupt things. I am assuming that everybody attending does not discriminate against straight people.

 

Regards John

Totally agree.

On our latest Celebrity sailing (I believe the 1st cruise line to be able to offer same sex marriages on board at sea after a change in the law in Malta which is their country of registration) there was a LGBT meeting at the Martini Bar every evening at 19:15.

 

However, that did not mean that this bar (must be one of the most inside popular bars in the fleet) was closed as a private event, resulting in any guest not being able to access.

 

It was just advertised as a venue where like minded people could meet. It wasn't hosted by officers and so not 'official' by any means but was clearly advertised in the daily news letter 'Celebrity Today'.

 

I can assure you that nobody at the Martini Bar discriminated against straight people, in fact we probably chatted to more non LGBT people! That's how we are.

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.....It was fun listening to old / straight people try to work out who Dorothy was and why she had so many friends on board.......

 

I was one of those people quite a few years back on my first US Cruise Line, trying to work out why Bill W had so many friends, who seemed to meet every night... Mind you, I was neither old nor straight :D

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Totally agree.

On our latest Celebrity sailing (I believe the 1st cruise line to be able to offer same sex marriages on board at sea after a change in the law in Malta which is their country of registration) .....

 

You may be right but P&O may also have been the first. The Supreme Court imposed same sex marriage legislation on Bermuda in May last year and Malta passed legislation in September last year. Sadly, the Senate of Bermuda reversed the decision last month!

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Ah - but then we have a problem as transgender people are not necessarily attracted to the same sex. I do however agree that things need to stop somewhere and LGBT seems to me the most logical place to stop.

At the risk of being flamed .....

I regard being gay and being transgender as two entirely separate issues. I see no obvious connection between someone who is attracted to their own sex and someone who wishes to dress like or be a member of the opposite sex.

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Hey, Boys,Girls, Boy girls, Girl boys, I do not give a monkeys about your sexuality, just keep it to yourselves, as Brit boy said, he had a loving personal relationship but not outrageously.

He is a proper person!

Sad for him, also, well happy that he could share.

 

We are going on holiday!

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