Friends of Dorothy


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#1
2 Posts
Joined Jun 2017
hi we are going on the 7 night cruise with P&O Oceana leaving Malta 7th Sept 2017. Was wondering if there is a friends of Dorothy meeting on this cruise or if anyone similar is going and would like to meet up.
#2
Solihull
2,256 Posts
Joined Sep 2013
Originally posted by Growlr
hi we are going on the 7 night cruise with P&O Oceana leaving Malta 7th Sept 2017. Was wondering if there is a friends of Dorothy meeting on this cruise or if anyone similar is going and would like to meet up.


You can just ask for a meeting time and place to be put into the Horizon newspaper.


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#3
Yorkshire
431 Posts
Joined Apr 2013
On Celebrity they put LGBT meeting in the paper. My daughter wanted to know why the people who make the TVs and the phone company had their own meetings ... bless
#4
United Kingdom
273 Posts
Joined Mar 2015
Am I very out of touch? I had no idea what the "Friends of Dorothy" was, until Tom Baker's post threw some light on it.
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#5
Wales
150 Posts
Joined Dec 2014
Never seen one on any of our P&O cruises.

If interested maybe have a word with the entertainment director and see if they can arrange it in the horizon.

Cunard do them - non hosted at 5pm on a certain side of the commodore club (crows nest) daily.
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#6
Wales
150 Posts
Joined Dec 2014
Originally posted by jh1809
Am I very out of touch? I had no idea what the "Friends of Dorothy" was, until Tom Baker's post threw some light on it.
No no.. dates back to the US in the 40's and 50's. A discreet/coded way of asking or saying if you were gay.
http://www.cruisecritic.co.uk/articles.cfm?ID=188
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Our cruise videos:
https://m.youtube.com/channel/UC3jJ03FsDa0viAmEvhVCtZw?

Follow me on Twitter: http://twitter.com/gavonacruise

Blog: https://www.holidaysatsea.co.uk

Our cruises:
2014 = Oct - Aurora | Dec - QM2
2015 = April - Arcadia, Western Europe | Oct - Ventura, Cruise break
2016 = Jan - QE, Hamburg round trip | June - Britannia, Fjords | June - Britannia, Guernsey | Oct - Oriana, Short Break | Dec - QV, Short Break
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#7
Staffordshire
1,171 Posts
Joined May 2011
Originally posted by jh1809
Am I very out of touch? I had no idea what the "Friends of Dorothy" was, until Tom Baker's post threw some light on it.
I don't think that you are really out of touch I first came across the term while working in USA. I have rarely heard "Friends of Dorothy" used for LGBT community in the UK but it is widely used in USA and Canada. I don't remember ever seeing Friends of Dorothy meeting advertised in the Horizon on P&O but they are always advertised on American ships.
#8
Manchester, UK
10,431 Posts
Joined Apr 2005
Originally posted by Tom Baker
On Celebrity they put LGBT meeting in the paper. My daughter wanted to know why the people who make the TVs and the phone company had their own meetings ... bless
Not anymore, but there is a card posted on the Community Board near guest relations advising of the time and venue.
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Peteukmcr from Manchester, UK





#9
Milton Keynes, England
1,902 Posts
Joined Jan 2011
When I was on Aurora a couple of years back, I was told P&O doesn't like 'Friends of Dorothy' as it's discriminatory! If you want something in the daily magazine, probably worth asking for LGBT+ instead.
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#10
1,284 Posts
Joined Jul 2012
Originally posted by Growlr
hi we are going on the 7 night cruise with P&O Oceana leaving Malta 7th Sept 2017. Was wondering if there is a friends of Dorothy meeting on this cruise or if anyone similar is going and would like to meet up.
Have you looked at the Roll Call specific to your cruise. You might get a better response on there.
#11
Solihull
2,256 Posts
Joined Sep 2013
Originally posted by besberry
When I was on Aurora a couple of years back, I was told P&O doesn't like 'Friends of Dorothy' as it's discriminatory! If you want something in the daily magazine, probably worth asking for LGBT+ instead.


Yes I agree, they use LGTB terminology, FOD is a bit dated now.


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#12
Grand Canyon Concourse
301 Posts
Joined Dec 2013
I'd image that they have also ditched FoD as LGBT is more commonly known. The younger crowd know LGBT more than FoD and would probably miss the get together.

Plus, I wonder over the years how many folk went to these meethings who knew a Dorothy and thought it was about her?
"Whaddya mean Wizard of Oz? I'm on about Dottie who worked in accounting... you know the one with the big perm and those oversized glasses"
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#13
2 Posts
Joined Jun 2017
thanks everyone for all the advice. I think I will contact cust services and ask them to mention LGBT in the Horizon magazine.
My BF will go mad but hey let's live dangerously.
If anyone is on the same cruise and wants to meet up please let me know.
#14
United Kingdom
515 Posts
Joined Jan 2013
I've seen Friends of Dorothy meetings advertised in Horizon, but not for a few years; however there were LGBT meetings advertised on my last cruise so they do happen.
#15
York, UK
4,747 Posts
Joined Jan 2009
Originally posted by peteukmcr
Not anymore, but there is a card posted on the Community Board near guest relations advising of the time and venue.


Pete, it was listed in the daily newspaper on our Celebrity cruise a couple of weeks ago. Unfortunately it's now called the LGBTQ meeting. Usually at the Martini Bar or World Class Bar. I hated to ask but unfortunately found out the Q at the end was for Queer. Apparently the US gays want to take ownership of the Queer term when for us it's already covered by the LGBT term. For us using Queer is a backward step and unnecessary. I long for the days of the friends of Dorothy meetings now. The US ships have the friends of Bill W meetings and yet don't need to spell out that this means Alcoholics Anonymous.


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#16
Solihull
2,256 Posts
Joined Sep 2013
I wish the meetings were arranged for 'LGBT and allies' because I'd like to go on the basis that it's usually the source of the best company onboard I might put that add in the Horizon on our next trip!


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#17
UK
345 Posts
Joined Mar 2016
Speaking as a friend of Dorothy and as a friend of Bill W (I know, I know, friends all over;-)) the reason it's called friends of Bill W rather than just Alcoholics Anonymous is because it's not just for alcoholics. Any of the "anonymous" group members are welcome, narcotics anonymous, overeaters anonymous, gamblers anonymous, sex addicts anonymous and all the other anonymous etc etc are all welcome at a friends of Bill W meeting.

Personally I've always understood that cruises were the gay-friendliest type of holiday since way back. Must be something about all those sailors. When I did my first cruise ten years ago I asked a fellow gay friend who had been on one if we would have any trouble as a gay couple on board and his response was something like "oh god no, I've been on the forums and it's really gay friendly, no problems at all".

I, too, prefer friends of dorothy to LGBT(Q) it's just so lovely and quaint. Personally I think it should be up to the group organising it to decide on which name to use, it shouldn't be dictated by the cruise line. But I suspect as many LGBTQ folk are as happy with either (if we could ever agree that is lol).


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#18
UK
345 Posts
Joined Mar 2016
Ps I've asked in a couple of places but are there any friends of Bill W on board the 23rd July sailing on Aurora? I know I can just advertise a meeting when I get on board but it would be good to connect if so.


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#19
UK
869 Posts
Joined Feb 2011
The first time I saw it was on a RCI ship and seeing a couple of meetings for different days on notice boards said to my hubby this Dorothy must have a lot of friends must be her birthday or something. I found out afterwards what it was. They have them on Cunard as well but I agree in this day and age they could just say what the meeting is as 99.9% of people I'm sure have no objection. But Friends of Dorothy does sound nice and friendly.

They also have Friends of Bill W meetings, which is AA but no idea who Bill was. Anyone?
#20
UK
345 Posts
Joined Mar 2016
Bill W was the founder of AA (along with a chap called Dr Bob, but Bill was essentially the main founder).

Now that the anonymous meetings are broader than AA and include NA, OA, GA etc etc the "friends of Bill W" don't just apply to alcoholics but anyone in a 12 step fellowship as they all sprang from AA which sprang from Bill W (in a very small nutshell). The FOBW meetings I went to on celebrity had people from AA, MA (marijuana anonymous) SAA and OA at them. It was a massive benefit having them on board. There was a room set aside by celebrity every day at 5pm and there were a couple of people who turned up every day and some who came occasionally.

Our next cruise is 17 nights so organising something is a must for me.


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