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Anyone stop bringing kids on cruises?


snorkelman
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My wife and I have cruised with our daughters for 6 years, but this last cruise (age 10) was not relaxing at all. They were constantly bickering. My wife and I have cruised many times without the kids and it was always relaxing. We are considering skipping the family cruise for a few years due to this recent experience, plus it would save a lot of money, and not involve issues about missing school/homework or sailing during summer break.

 

In the past our kids have LOVED the kids programs (RCI) but the past 2 years (age group voyagers) they don't like it so much with the heavy emphasis on constant ball-related games.

 

I am wondering if I will feel bad about not bringing them, and book the whole family and have a repeat of the bickering. I would like to hear anyone else who has experienced anything similar and what you decided and whether you regretted it.

Edited by snorkelman
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Two of my dd's were 10 and 12 on our last cruise, but they never bicker. However, I've found that none of my kids has ever liked the tween clubs on cruises. They loved the kids clubs, and the teen clubs.

 

On our last cruise, ds15 and dd17 got along great in the teen club, and they never got along at home. Just wait it out a few more years.

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I would absolutely leave the kids at home if they're not appreciating it and bringing down your vacation. It's important for you and your wife to have quality vacation time. Usually a cruise is a great way for a couple to have that and also be able to bring the kids, but if the kids aren't keeping in mind that it's their parents' hard-earned vacation too, then I'd absolutely leave mine home. I'd think with mine that simply planning the trip without them would open their eyes and bring promises of improved behavior, but for you, go enjoy some kid-free time alone with your spouse. Sounds like it will be good for all of you.

 

Best,

Mia

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I agree with Kerry's girls that it would be appropriate to leave the children at home if they won't behave.

 

As kids get older they may become less interested in the kids clubs. I'm not sure a cruise with a lot of sea days would be ideal at this age for all children. What kind of activities are your children's favorite things to do on vacation? Did the cruise they bickered on fit with what they normally like to do on vacation? If you were to cruise again with them, you should involve them in the planning to make sure it is something they really want to do, and if the cruise isn't something they would appreciate I'd leave them at home.

 

I'm so sorry - this must have been a really frustrating experience for you. I'm not trying to pile on to your misery with my comment, but the fundamental question for me if I were trying to decide if I should continue vacation with my kid would be what kind of trip would my kids actually enjoy in the future, and is that trip something I would also enjoy or is our family better off if the kids stay at Grandma's house and the parents go alone.

Edited by kitkat343
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Thanks for the feedback. Our kids are twins and have always been with each other. They have shared the same room...until next week, when we will have them in separate rooms due to the constant bickering.

 

Our kids are good most of the time, but our 7 day cruise is our relaxing time, when I do not want to constantly be doing stuff with them. They would like to spend 100% of the time in the pool, with me, playing with them.

 

I am leaning towards booking our next 7 day cruise just for my wife and I and leaving the kids with grandma, who has a pool.

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If it was me, before I left my kids home from a cruise vacation, I would sit down with them and discuss what happened on the last cruise. Ask them for their input as to why there was so much discourse between them. Explain to them the impact their behavior had on how you and your wife enjoyed the cruise. Explain to them that going on a cruise is a privilege, and if they cannot make it a pleasant experience for everyone, then they won't be allowed to come. I would also touch on the facts of the situation as far as Mom & Dad get a certain amount of vacation time from work, and have a fixed amount of discretionary money to spend on vacations. Explain that unless everyone is having a good time - parents included - then these limited resources are being wasted. Sometimes kids forget that their parents need a vacation too!

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We had this same discussion with our kids after our cruise in April. My boys are 14 and 7 and cannot get along to save their lives some days! Unfortunately, the cruise was no exception. By day 4 of our 9 day cruise, I was ready to ship them home!! While it was a FANTASTIC vacation and we really had a great time, as a parent, I was insanely frustrated. They weren't interested in the kids programs, which is fine, we were together, as a family. We had my parents and grandparents with us as well, but the kids were glued to our butts it seemed. It was not relaxing by any stretch of the imagination. Add in that they wanted constant entertainment as well...and I get what you feel!!!

 

We told them that the next vacation will likely be an adults only trip. We are very limited on our vacation dollars and they need to be enjoyed fully!!

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  • 2 weeks later...

We started cruising with ours when they were little. The big "kids" are now 24,23,21,20. (We also have three littles 5,4,10months)There were a few years when they were in the 12-15 range that they refused to go to Adventure Ocean. At first it bothered us, mainly because we were not comfortable with them roaming the ship on their own(ever). So, what we had planned as a vacation with use of adventure ocean became a true family cruise with no break for us. In the end that first cruise where they were glued to us 24/7 ended up being one of the most memorable. Ours do some bickering but with 4 of them it's a little easier because if two are having issues there is always someone else to hang out with. If they were bickering through an entire cruise I would not hesitate to let them stay home next time. If faced with that we would probably do a less expensive, shorter cruise and leave them home and then consider a family cruise again and see if they are ready to be respectful again.

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We usually do a couples only trip (Just off the Carnival Victory last week😊😊😊) and then a family trip that is shorter and more geared towards what they want to do. I've realized that a good vacay for kids only takes about 3 days. 2 complete non stop fun days and a chill day. Then they are ready to get back to their regular life ( cause lets face it- their life is a vacation we pay for everyday )

 

 

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We usually do a couples only trip (Just off the Carnival Victory last week😊😊😊) and then a family trip that is shorter and more geared towards what they want to do. I've realized that a good vacay for kids only takes about 3 days. 2 complete non stop fun days and a chill day.

 

That is a great idea. We live in Florida and it is easy for us to get cheap cruises. We usually take a 7 day (this has been with the kids for the past 5 years) and my wife and I usually take a 3 or 4 day cruise. Maybe I will switch that around!

 

Thanks all for your insight.

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We have four boys and one of them, the youngest, could be a real pain in the behind. He had such an attitude about not wanting to go on a family cruise that we shocked him and left him at home with an aunt and uncle, and took the other three. Boy, did that change his attitude as he never thought we'd do that to him. Not once after that did we have a problem with his sulky behavior about trips.

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As the kids age, you may want to reconsider the types of vacation you take. less "relax" non-planned time. more time in port doing "stuff". Might be a good time for a Med or Baltic cruise and take in some of the historic and cultural sites and keep everyone "busy"

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That is a great idea. We live in Florida and it is easy for us to get cheap cruises. We usually take a 7 day (this has been with the kids for the past 5 years) and my wife and I usually take a 3 or 4 day cruise. Maybe I will switch that around!

 

 

 

Thanks all for your insight.

 

 

:-) :-)

 

 

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I would love to cruise without my kids. My dream is an Alaska cruise. Alone.

 

But sadly there is no one who can keep them. Son is special needs (tube fed) and the only relative who can care for him for more than a couple hours is my mom, who is our normal daycare. If I am off work, she wants to be off work too. She does so much for us there is no way I would ask for more.

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