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dazey

55+ Crusing - Hope others are mad at us

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Our first cruise ever, we were assigned to a 6-top with an Uncle/Nephew and two women in late 20's, my DH and me (29 or 30 at the time). Uncle in mid to late 60's, Nephew in 30's but very awkward. When the two women found out that DH was "not available" and had sized up the Uncle and Nephew -- they did not even make it to dessert the first night! This was an Alaskan cruise in 1989! Crazy place to be looking for a man.

 

Years later, my DD was 13YO. We ended up at a large table with two UK couples traveling together and another couple (Costa Ricans who had just moved to Southern CA). All of the adults were within about 15-20 years of each other. One of the women from one of the UK couples was visibly irateate at having a "child" at "their" table - but the other three of the couple were nonplussed. DD has always been a polite kid who has been able to hold her end of a conversation. By the end of the cruise the original stink-face still was not happy, but her friend had struck up a relationship with my DD and confided to me that she really enjoyed having our DD at the table and a few weeks later sent DD a Christmas card with a clipping from a London Newspaper about a topic the two of them had been debating.

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Actually I prefer it, we get little chance at home to sit and enjoy each other over a liesurly meal, normally there is so much else that requires our attention.

 

We agree, we enjoy a table for two at times...after nearly 30 years of marriage we still love a romantic dinner and sharing an intimate conversation at an evening meal.

Edited by Cruisintimer

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We are in our late 60's and after 55 were finally able to afford to cruise and enjoy ourselves many many times.At times we are seated by accident(I assume) with much younger people and can see how they look at us. Most times the maitre d' suggests a change of table or we just ask to be seated alone. Similar to how young people are polite but don't really want to talk to you "just as a person" at a party.

 

We have enjoyed many MDR tables with other couples within 20 years of our age and we had a great time - sometimes establishing long relationships.

 

It just feels badly when I read reviews about Celebrity and it is mentioned again and again that everyone was old. I understand but it is almost like we shouldn't go because we are old. I am still going to cruise and hope others still do.

 

You never think you are going to be so old that you don't belong! It just happens.

 

We always are seated with people of all ages and can find something in common with everyone despite the age difference.

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We always are seated with people of all ages and can find something in common with everyone despite the age difference.

 

Agree, everyone is unique and every age group should feel welcomed.

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On 3/16/2018 at 9:43 PM, WAMarathoner said:

Back in the days when they only had fixed dining we were at our table for 8 the first night when one of the other men says please bow your heads for grace! We were moved the next night! As we're two other couples. Unreal.


Why is that "unreal" when <80% of Americans consider themselves Christian? If it had been a Shinto, Hindu, Muslim or Flying Spaghetti Monster adherent, I simply would've remained silent for a moment. It's about respect. Would that one minute of your life have affected your cruise all that much? THAT is what's unreal to me. I'm sure he was as glad you moved as you were to move.

Tolerance and respect goes both ways.  I am not going to "bow my head" but I would remain silent for a moment.  I would be uncomfortable if anyone of any religion expected me to join them or if they felt it necessary to "speak" their prayer.

Many of the approximately 75% of Americans who consider themselves to be Christians also admit to not be "religious".  And among even the devout Christians there are widely different practices and prayers.  An Orthodox Christian's prayer may "offend" a Baptist (or vice versa).  And for those of us who are not Christians, being asked to participate in another religion's rites is sacrilegious both to my belief's and to the other religion.

As others have suggested, a moment of silence - to be used however everyone wishes - is fine.  Even the least religious of us could use a few seconds of silence before beginning a meal.

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On 9/26/2016 at 5:28 PM, JimnKaren said:

And, sitting at a table for two is just like eating at home! Not fun on a cruise.

 

Jim

You are very fortunate!  You have obviously never sat with an adult who picked boogers at the table and then wiped them on the table cloth.  Nor have you sat with a loud mouth drunk or someone who insisted on stating their political or racial prejudices.  Or perhaps one who is loud and abusive to the server or other staff.

We love people and love visiting with others but the aforementioned incidents have necessitated a table for two always.

Yes, it is just like eating at home where we don't have those problems and do enjoy each other's company.

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Funny, we've sailed Celebrity 3 times (soon to be 4th) and have not found it any 'older' or younger than the other lines we've sailed.  We found HAL to skew the oldest.   

 

As for sailing and enjoying ourselves with others, well we were 35 on our first cruise and 52 now.  We've always enjoyed the company of anyone, no matter their age.  But I do tend to really enjoy sitting and talking to those with 'life experiences.'   I grew up with my grandparents right next door so I've always looked up to and have enjoyed sitting with those 'past a certain age.'   Maybe one day our paths will cross and we can enjoy a nice cocktail to share stories.   Happy cruising and keep smiling!

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On 7/16/2016 at 2:06 PM, dazey said:

We are in our late 60's and after 55 were finally able to afford to cruise and enjoy ourselves many many times.At times we are seated by accident(I assume) with much younger people and can see how they look at us. Most times the maitre d' suggests a change of table or we just ask to be seated alone. Similar to how young people are polite but don't really want to talk to you "just as a person" at a party.

 

We have enjoyed many MDR tables with other couples within 20 years of our age and we had a great time - sometimes establishing long relationships.

 

It just feels badly when I read reviews about Celebrity and it is mentioned again and again that everyone was old. I understand but it is almost like we shouldn't go because we are old. I am still going to cruise and hope others still do.

 

You never think you are going to be so old that you don't belong! It just happens.

Hello dazey,

I am sorry you were made to feel that way.  I have read so many hurtful post cruise reviews about "us old people" and the hurt has basically turned into anger at times.  What are we supposed to do?  God forbid those of us "oldsters" who need a walker or cane or scooter!  My husband and I turn 70 on our Celebrity Reflection September 30th cruise this year. We neither look like it, nor do we act old. We go to the gym 5 days a week and are widely traveled.  We keep abreast with current events and love to hear about others travels!  Sharing helpful travel tips is great.  We have met some wonderful people on our Celebrity cruises and look forward to meeting many more!  SO, TO YOU YOUNG WHIPPER SNAPPERS, WE ARE HERE TO ENJOY OUR CRUISE JUST AS YOU ARE.  Just suck it up and get to know us!  You might enjoy our company.

HappyCamper49 

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On 9/26/2016 at 9:59 PM, goldenrod said:

Some nights we like a table for two we are 70 and 68 we like a mixed table more at breakfast and lunch

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

 

That's how my husband and I are. We're both introverts, and by the end of the day, we just want a quiet table for 2. But we really enjoy starting our day at a larger table and meeting people, and socializing more at lunch as well.

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On 3/16/2018 at 8:43 PM, WAMarathoner said:

Why is that "unreal" when <80% of Americans consider themselves Christian? If it had been a Shinto, Hindu, Muslim or Flying Spaghetti Monster adherent, I simply would've remained silent for a moment. It's about respect. Would that one minute of your life have affected your cruise all that much? THAT is what's unreal to me. I'm sure he was as glad you moved as you were to move.

 

Sorry, but the fact that we share a dining table does not mean you have the right to impose your religion on me in any way. I'll certainly be silent and respect your personal beliefs, but I will not participate (and would be offended to be put in the position of having to refuse). Also, I'd see that request as a big red flag that a LOT more intrusiveness into our personal lives than asking us to join in "saying grace" would be forthcoming the remainder of the week. I'd definitely ask to move.

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14 minutes ago, DebInAntigua said:

 

Sorry, but the fact that we share a dining table does not mean you have the right to impose your religion on me in any way. 

 

You are polite,  I probably would have said something or just continued eating. I  am one of those non-believers and you do not have the right to impose your religion on me either.  You can pray all you want, I won't bother you, but I am sure am not going to join you.  

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Yes, we "Ask the Blessing" at home.

No, we do not do this in restaurants at home or on ships.

To us doing this seems sacrilegious.  

Bascially comes down to how you act toward  others ... not making a big show of praying.

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On 10/23/2016 at 11:01 PM, GUT2407 said:

 

I too find it unreal that anyone would ask to move tables just because someone wanted to give thanks.

I wonder how things would have gone if instead they had asked, "Would you like to say grace with us?" 

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12 hours ago, Debbborra said:

I wonder how things would have gone if instead they had asked, "Would you like to say grace with us?" 

Some of us are not religious, I would have found it very offensive if someone tried pushing it on me.

If they had asked in the way your question is,  we would have said no thank you and finished eating or moved.  It would have made me very uncomfortable.  Not everyone is a believer. 

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We are both of the opinion that religion Is very personal.  We would never dream of wearing it on our sleeve or worse asking a stranger to join us in some sort of pre diner prayer or grace ritual. 

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On 3/3/2019 at 3:05 PM, DebInAntigua said:

 

Sorry, but the fact that we share a dining table does not mean you have the right to impose your religion on me in any way. I'll certainly be silent and respect your personal beliefs, but I will not participate (and would be offended to be put in the position of having to refuse). Also, I'd see that request as a big red flag that a LOT more intrusiveness into our personal lives than asking us to join in "saying grace" would be forthcoming the remainder of the week. I'd definitely ask to move.

Life is too short to get offended so easily. 

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On 3/7/2019 at 2:13 AM, WAMarathoner said:

Life is too short to get offended so easily. 

 

I think life's too short to pray to an imaginary magical sky-god, but hey, to each his own.

 

I respect your right to believe in whatever you wish, respect mine to disbelieve and not be pressured to participate in any way.

 

I'll admit, it is a pet peeve of mine when religious people try to foist their beliefs on others. Doubly so when they have the mindset that their religion is the "only true way".  It hasn't happened very often, but I've been put in uncomfortable positions before where fervent religious believers become quite aggressive with their attempts to promote their belief structure. I'd much prefer to avoid that scenario over dinner than have a confrontation, because I sincerely respect people's right to do as they wish with their own lives. Just don't try to force it into mine.

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As a couple knocking at 80 we have never had a situation where age on the traditional large table dining we choose has been a problem  We now have 20 or 30 great friends made from these cruises and visit with them and they with us    Age is not a discriminator

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We had the pleasure of taking our youngest daughter with us two years ago.  We had booked a 10 night Eastern no Norwegian and the third person cruised free.  Well, not really free, but only had to pay port fees and tips.  We called it the Geriatric Cruise.  Our daughter was 43 at the time and I believe that she was one of the youngest onboard.  There may have been a few younger, but they didn't stand out.  Angie got along just fine.

 

On several other cruises we have had younger people at the table with us.  Most have been a lot of fun.  My wife has worked with early learning  (Headstart) for over 40 years and I am still a kid at heart so we have no problems with the younger set, although I have been know to shove one out of the way at the water slide.

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We have had wonderful experiences with people at our tables.  The most memorable was on the Independence when a mid-20s couple on a belated honeymoon was seated with us and our 3 kids (we were late 40s and kids were 15-20).  We said that we were OK if they wanted to move, but they chose to stay.  We had the most amazing time; drinks with us in the evening and gym with my sons during the day.  We still visit them in England and their wee ones call us their Canadian Grandparents!

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We have usually had wonderful table mates of all ages.  In over 20 plus years of cruising I can only think of three times where we were really turned off.

 

-one couple wanted us to join hands and say grace.  we declined and we astounded that someone would not only wear their faith on their sleeve like this but be so rude as to think others were of the same faith.  We were not the only ones at the table who were offended.  We never returned to the table.

 

-one man talked US politics all night.  We were not particularly interested in hearing for two long nights in a row that his preferred party would cure world hunger and bring about peace in the world.  We left on the third night.

 

-one evening, a gentleman, after finding out we were from Canada, told us about all the woes and imperfections with our health car system.   The only way to stop that nonsense was to ask him point blank if he had ever been to Canada and/or used our health care system.  It was a no to both.  I think that he was a little embarrassed.  Two other couples at the table winked. They we happy that we clammed him up.

Edited by iancal

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We prefer to skip the dinning conficts .  On NCL we can dine by ourselves or join a fellow ship mate .  It is always our chose as to where and how we dine.  Love NCL and RCI for this reason.

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On ‎10‎/‎25‎/‎2018 at 8:59 AM, 1980dory said:

You are very fortunate!  You have obviously never sat with an adult who picked boogers at the table and then wiped them on the table cloth.  Nor have you sat with a loud mouth drunk or someone who insisted on stating their political or racial prejudices.  Or perhaps one who is loud and abusive to the server or other staff.

We love people and love visiting with others but the aforementioned incidents have necessitated a table for two always.

Yes, it is just like eating at home where we don't have those problems and do enjoy each other's company.

Ewwwww! NO, we have definitely NOT had the horrific dining experiences you have endured!    However, I would like to suggest there are two subjects that should NOT be discussed in the MDR on a cruise:  RELIGION & POLITICS.  America is so divided these days, I fear some of us would embarrass ourselves in front of any nice foreigners at our table. There is another couple cruising with us for the first time and we are of different political opinions.  I have informed the wife (most opinionated) that we should NOT discuss politics at a nice dinner and she went so far as to say, "If it comes up, we could just say we prefer not to discuss politics at a lovely dinner."  Whew!  Hope everyone is of like mind.

HappyCamper49

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A lot of people still know the difference between being a fun and interesting table mate or being the worst stereotype cruise passenger you care to use as an example - but the good guys are falling behind.  Unfortunately, the odds of being exposed to people that don't care about anyone around them or sadly were never taught how to act properly in public is increasing. Seems the lowest denominator is becoming the norm.

In an attempt to change the odds in our favor my wife and I choose ships that carry no more than about 600 guests. At dinner we make it a point to choose a table for two because [unlike some cruise passengers these days] we like to look neat and tidy at dinner, keep politics and religion out of dinner and cruise ship conversation and would rather not have some caveman family take charge of the meal.

That said, we might meet up with the 'caveman' and his family in one of the ships pubs later and laugh ourselves to tears but dinner on a cruise ship for me is all about my wife and me. Selfish? Yup, but to coin a phrase used often on CC "we paid for it".

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