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Transgender Friendly Cruise Lines?

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My girlfriend and I are looking to go on a cruise in the near future, but she is trans and still has her deadname on her passport. Does anyone know how any cruise lines handle this? I know for legal purposes she’ll be addressed by her dead name by TSA/etc., but as far as on-board, any lines that handle it better than others?

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On 3/16/2019 at 11:29 PM, moonandflowers said:

My girlfriend and I are looking to go on a cruise in the near future, but she is trans and still has her deadname on her passport. Does anyone know how any cruise lines handle this? I know for legal purposes she’ll be addressed by her dead name by TSA/etc., but as far as on-board, any lines that handle it better than others?

 

I don't have any first-hand experience with this situation but you might like to start with Celebrity Cruises.  They are vocal in their support and appreciation for the LGBT community.  As far as being called by name, it's unlikely the crew members would address you by name except for your cabin steward, dining room waiters and front desk staff if you have an issue or need assistance.  The waiters normally ask your name so that's easy to respond too as will the cabin steward (the stewards have a pax list for the staterooms they are responsible for) but will address you however you wish.)  The staff on the reception desk will also not normally address you by name unless they are reading it from the computer screen. They normally ask for your stateroom number.   Some of the crew may be more formal in how they speak with you such as Ms. Smith rather than first name but you can always ask them to address you as you would like to be called.  Hope this helps!

Edited by RoyalVisit
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On 3/16/2019 at 9:29 PM, moonandflowers said:

My girlfriend and I are looking to go on a cruise in the near future, but she is trans and still has her deadname on her passport. Does anyone know how any cruise lines handle this? I know for legal purposes she’ll be addressed by her dead name by TSA/etc., but as far as on-board, any lines that handle it better than others?

How about getting a new passport with the proper name on it. 

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I was on a Carnival cruise with my trans wife when she was still legally under her deadname (although she did have a female gender marker on her passport). At the time we booked it, she was early in her transition and wasn't sure how comfortable she'd be being out by the time the cruise came around. When cruise time approached, we contacted Carnival, not really expecting it to be too big a deal, but we were wrong.

 

Unfortunately, they required her to present as male upon embarkation so her cruise card and the associated picture showed her male presenting. This determination came from a supervisor after a call center employee wrongly told us it would be okay for her to board presenting female when her ID was male name and male presenting. We had requested this info in writing to have at the pier and that resulted in it going to the supervisor who provided us written documentation that unequivocally stated she would not be able to board unless she presented as a male and that the call center employee would be spoken to about her wrong information. When going ashore in port, she again reverted to male presentation to avoid any difficulties and/or unneeded stress getting on or off the ship.

 

Onboard, she presented female (and put a little sticker with her female name on her card), used the women's restrooms when it wasn't feasible to use the cabin or the unisex, and was never treated any differently than any other cruiser. I honestly don't recall if we gave her name to the cabin steward, but he saw her coming and going in both male and female presentation and was always friendly. We had set dining with the same waitstaff each night. She introduced herself with her female name the first night and that's what they used. Other staff had no need to ever address her by name. She didn't have any problems using her card on board the ship, but whenever possible we used my card to avoid any possible unpleasantness.

 

It wasn't an ideal situation and she certainly didn't enjoy herself as much as she would have without the added stress or being forced to present as male. It wasn't as difficult for her as it may have been for others further along in their transition or those with bad feelings associated with their deadname. It did prompt us not to go on any further cruises until her legal name change was complete.

 

We have since gone on a cruise on Celebrity with everything in her proper name. If anyone clocked her as trans, they didn't show it in anyway and it was a wonderful vacation.

 

In regard to the poster asking about getting a passport with the proper name, that would be the ideal scenario. Unfortunately the process for getting a name change differs from state to state and can be subject to a judge's discretion to grant. My wife's name change itself took 5 months, and then another few weeks for her updated passport to arrive.

 

 

 

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On 4/21/2019 at 10:13 PM, thegashlycrumb said:

I was on a Carnival cruise with my trans wife when she was still legally under her deadname (although she did have a female gender marker on her passport). At the time we booked it, she was early in her transition and wasn't sure how comfortable she'd be being out by the time the cruise came around. When cruise time approached, we contacted Carnival, not really expecting it to be too big a deal, but we were wrong.

 

Unfortunately, they required her to present as male upon embarkation so her cruise card and the associated picture showed her male presenting. This determination came from a supervisor after a call center employee wrongly told us it would be okay for her to board presenting female when her ID was male name and male presenting. We had requested this info in writing to have at the pier and that resulted in it going to the supervisor who provided us written documentation that unequivocally stated she would not be able to board unless she presented as a male and that the call center employee would be spoken to about her wrong information. When going ashore in port, she again reverted to male presentation to avoid any difficulties and/or unneeded stress getting on or off the ship.

 

Onboard, she presented female (and put a little sticker with her female name on her card), used the women's restrooms when it wasn't feasible to use the cabin or the unisex, and was never treated any differently than any other cruiser. I honestly don't recall if we gave her name to the cabin steward, but he saw her coming and going in both male and female presentation and was always friendly. We had set dining with the same waitstaff each night. She introduced herself with her female name the first night and that's what they used. Other staff had no need to ever address her by name. She didn't have any problems using her card on board the ship, but whenever possible we used my card to avoid any possible unpleasantness.

 

It wasn't an ideal situation and she certainly didn't enjoy herself as much as she would have without the added stress or being forced to present as male. It wasn't as difficult for her as it may have been for others further along in their transition or those with bad feelings associated with their deadname. It did prompt us not to go on any further cruises until her legal name change was complete.

 

We have since gone on a cruise on Celebrity with everything in her proper name. If anyone clocked her as trans, they didn't show it in anyway and it was a wonderful vacation.

 

In regard to the poster asking about getting a passport with the proper name, that would be the ideal scenario. Unfortunately the process for getting a name change differs from state to state and can be subject to a judge's discretion to grant. My wife's name change itself took 5 months, and then another few weeks for her updated passport to arrive.

 

 

 

 

This is a really infuriating story - surely there are better ways Carnival could have dealt with this?  Given its 2019, they should have done better.  Surely someone presenting in a different way to their legal name is no longer that unusual?

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