Dining advise.

[pbcbbc]

We are all set for our cruise on the Carnival Panorama. We always do assigned seating as we love having the same waiters and table mates. This time around we are considering a couple of the specialty restaurants leaving us with only 3 or 4 nights in the MDR. How many missed nights in the MDR do you think is acceptable? Are we being too rude?

[cruizergal70]

You don't owe anything to your assigned tablemates. They are strangers to you. They won't care. It's your vacation. Do what makes you happy.

Edited November 2, 2019 by cruizergal70

[grandmarnnurse]

24 minutes ago, pbcbbc said:

We are all set for our cruise on the Carnival Panorama. We always do assigned seating as we love having the same waiters and table mates. This time around we are considering a couple of the specialty restaurants leaving us with only 3 or 4 nights in the MDR. How many missed nights in the MDR do you think is acceptable? Are we being too rude?

I don’t see it rude at all! It’s your vacation, not your table mates! Personally, I’d only choose YTD so that I never have to share my dinner and table with strangers. You can always request to be seated in the same waiter’s section, as I’ve done this. So, if you prefer to have a set dining time at a table with strangers, don’t worry about rudeness for dining elsewhere. I really don’t know how they handle that when someone dines elsewhere, as we don’t set at a shared table. Perhaps you just notify the matre D on nights your elsewhere so they aren’t waiting for you to arrive. 

[grandmarnnurse]

Really, I’d consider for next time, just doing YTD. It makes the most sense, especially if you like to dine elsewhere on some nights. As I said, you can always request your preferred waiter.

[beachbum53]

Just let your waiter (and your tablemates if possible) know ahead of time that you'll be dining elsewhere on whichever evening you choose. That way, no one has to wait for you to show up. Whether you dine elsewhere once, twice, or more, as long as everyone knows ahead of time, it won't be a problem. What is unacceptable is NOT telling anyone of your plans, and causing your tablemates to wait unnecessarily to be waited on.

[ray98]

Rude to strangers because you dine at other venues?

[cruizergal70]

29 minutes ago, beachbum53 said:

Just let your waiter (and your tablemates if possible) know ahead of time that you'll be dining elsewhere on whichever evening you choose. That way, no one has to wait for you to show up. Whether you dine elsewhere once, twice, or more, as long as everyone knows ahead of time, it won't be a problem. What is unacceptable is NOT telling anyone of your plans, and causing your tablemates to wait unnecessarily to be waited on.

Why would the OP have to notify strangers of their actions? The tablemates are free to begin eating whenever they want.

[pbcbbc]

Thanks for the responses! We are leaning towards switching to YTD. So many good options on this ship that are making it hard to decide! All over the map with our decisions!

[sanmarcosman]

7 minutes ago, cruizergal70 said:

Why would the OP have to notify strangers of their actions? The tablemates are free to begin eating whenever they want.

Because unless advised of your non-attendance wait staff often wait longer before approaching the table to take orders in the expectation all will be present. Also, it is a courtesy.

Edited November 2, 2019 by sanmarcosman

[cruizergal70]

8 minutes ago, sanmarcosman said:

Because unless advised of your non-attendance wait staff often wait longer before approaching the table to take orders in the expectation all will be present. Also, it is a courtesy.

I don't know you. I don't have to tell you of my decisions. If you are at the table and want to begin eating, tell the waiter you want to start ordering. 

[sanmarcosman]

2 minutes ago, cruizergal70 said:

I don't know you. I don't have to tell you of my decisions. If you are at the table and want to begin eating, tell the waiter you want to start ordering. 

I don't know you either but if you tell the wait staff the night before your absence that takes care of the whole situation.

Edited November 2, 2019 by sanmarcosman

[cruizergal70]

2 minutes ago, sanmarcosman said:

I don't know you either but if you tell the wait staff the night before your absence that takes care of the whole situation.

What if you don't know in advance or change plans at the last minute? To each,  their own, I guess.

[pbcbbc]

We will say something as we want to be respectful.

[sanmarcosman]

1 minute ago, cruizergal70 said:

What if you don't know in advance or change plans at the last minute? To each,  their own, I guess.

Of course in those situations it's moot. It does help the staff to know if you have made reservations elsewhere and they appreciate your thoughtfulness. I'll admit we don't always know ourselves but when we do we share our plans to help the staff. 

[pbcbbc]

2 minutes ago, cruizergal70 said:

What if you don't know in advance or change plans at the last minute? To each,  their own, I guess.

This could easily happen with us!

[sc4125]

15 minutes ago, cruizergal70 said:

I don't know you. I don't have to tell you of my decisions. If you are at the table and want to begin eating, tell the waiter you want to start ordering. 

This is why I no longer eat with strangers.  I know courtesy has lost it's appeal lately, but is it seriously that big of a deal to advise the waiter that you won't be there (if you know in advance) rather than making them take orders 2 or 3 times at the same table because people either come in late or don't come at all, and like you, don't think a heads up is a decent thing to do. 

 

It wouldn't be so bad if people didn't come meandering in 15 - 20 minutes after their scheduled dining time.  I personally wish they would close the doors 10 minutes after the dining time and not let people in.

 

I know how hard the waiters work and, for me, a little courtesy goes a long way.  

[lennythenose]

To me it’s just a matter of manners. If we are at our own table I would notify the staff if I knew ahead for all the reasons stated above. If there are others at the table i would let them know as well. It is always polite to wait until everyone is seated. Also if I was at the table and someone just didn’t show up I would be concerned I had done/said something wrong. Obviously plans change but in that case I would apologize to everyone when I ate there again.  

[Joe817]

3 minutes ago, lennythenose said:

To me it’s just a matter of manners. If we are at our own table I would notify the staff if I knew ahead for all the reasons stated above. If there are others at the table i would let them know as well. It is always polite to wait until everyone is seated. Also if I was at the table and someone just didn’t show up I would be concerned I had done/said something wrong. Obviously plans change but in that case I would apologize to everyone when I ate there again.  

^^^^^This. Common courtesy goes a long ways, in confined quarters. 

[soonernstlouis]

This thread’s posts has given me more certainty in choosing your time dining on my next Carnival cruise.

Edited November 2, 2019 by soonernstlouis

[cruizergal70]

17 minutes ago, soonernstlouis said:

This thread’s posts has given me more certainty in choosing your time dining on my next Carnival cruise.

I go further.  I avoid the MDR at all costs. 

[Shaded Lady]

We choose YTD for the flexibility... when we are at a table for two the tables are so close together that we're actually dining with 4 other people anyway so the thought of sharing doesn't faze us! However if we had preset dining and were sharing a table with others, we would at least let the staff know if we had plans for another night- as others have said, not a deal-breaker, just common courtesy!

[PhillyFan33579]

We always let the wait staff in the MDR know if we won’t be there when we are eating at a speciality restaurant or at a port. To me it is the right thing to do since after the first night in the MDR, almost every wait staff has drinks waiting for us at the table when we get there.  Additionally, if we are at a larger table with people we don’t know, we always let them know too when we won’t be there. 

[coevan]

1 hour ago, sanmarcosman said:

It does help the staff to know if you have made reservations elsewhere and they appreciate your thoughtfulness.

 

 

What if you eat at the Steakhouse the first night, do you run to the MDR early and alert everyone ? I agree, you don't owe anyone an explanation on where or when you eat. This is why we love YTD, eat when we are hungry.

[simplelife]

I was always taught  is common courtesy to let your tablemates and waitstaff know if you will not be dining  with them on a particular night. We show common courtesy to strangers in other situations, so why not this one?

 

[Jasonsterling]

3 hours ago, pbcbbc said:

We are all set for our cruise on the Carnival Panorama. We always do assigned seating as we love having the same waiters and table mates. This time around we are considering a couple of the specialty restaurants leaving us with only 3 or 4 nights in the MDR. How many missed nights in the MDR do you think is acceptable? Are we being too rude?

I think it's very nice that you are concerned about your fellow table mates on your upcoming cruise. I suspect you really enjoy getting to know other travelers and as such you don't want to disappoint anyone else looking for the same experience on their cruise. I think that's great of you. That said and especially in this age when we are lucky to have such a wide range of options and so many choices for dining on ships I think that you should take avail yourself of those opportunities as often as you like and there is no set rule. It may even give you and your table mates something to discuss and have a conversation about on the other nights in the MDR. Enjoy your cruise and enjoy the specialty restaurants- I've found them all to be very good!