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“So a Penguin, a Horse and Polar Bear walk into a bar on the Edge...


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A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk when he comes across a preacher baptizing people in t the river. The drunk walks into the water and bumps into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of booze. Whereupon he asks the drunk, “Are you ready to find Jesus?”

“Yes I want to find him!” replies the drunk!

So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the river. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, “Brother, have you found Jesus?”

The drunk says, “No , I haven’t”

The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him to the water again, but this time for a bit longer. He pulls him out of the water and asks again,

"Have you found Jesus, my brother?”

The drunk again answers, “ No, I have not found Jesus!”

By this time the preacher is at his wits end so he dunks the drunk in the water again, but this time he holds him down for about 30 seconds! When the drunk begins kicking his arms and legs, the preacher pulls him up.  The preacher asks the drunk again, 

“For the love of God, have you found Jesus?…”

The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says to the preacher,

“ Are you sure this is where he fell in?”

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The blond walks into the library:

Blond:    I'll have a big mac, large fries, and a diet coke.

Librarian:  Madam, this is a library.

Blond:  I'll have a big mac, large fries, and a diet coke.  


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Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked up a box of tampons and headed to the check out counter

The pharmacist at the counter asked the older boy. “ Son, how old are you?” “Eight” the boy replied.

The man continued, “ Do you know what these are used for?” The boy replied, “ Not exactly, but they aren’t for me. They’re for him. He’s my brother, he’s four!” “Oh really,” the pharmacist replied with a grin.

“Yes”, the boy said, “We see on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim, play tennis and ride a bike! Right now, he can’t do none of those!"



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