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“So a Penguin, a Horse and Polar Bear walk into a bar on the Edge...


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  Sitting by the window of her convent, Sister Barbara opened a letter from home one evening.  Inside the letter was a $100 bill her parents had sent. Sister Barbara smiled at the gesture.

  As she read the letter by the window, she noticed a shabbily dressed stranger    leaning against the lamp post below.

  Quickly, she wrote, "Don't despair. - Sister Barbara," on a piece of paper,    wrapped the $100 bill in it, got the man's attention, and tossed it out the window to him. The stranger picked it up, and with a puzzled expression and a tip of his hat,    went off down the street.

  The next day, Sister Barbara was told that a man was at her door,    insisting on seeing her.
She went down and found the stranger waiting.  Without a word, he handed her a huge wad of $100 bills.
"What's this?" she asked.
"That's the $8,000 you have coming Sister," he replied.
"Don't Despair paid 80-to-1."


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One day, I accidentally overturned my golf buggy.

Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out, “ Are you ok, what’s your name?”  “It’s Phil and i am ok, thanks, “ I replied.

“ Phil, forget your troubles . Come to my villa, rest awhile, and i’ll help you get the cart up later.” “That’s mighty nice of you, “ i said, “ but i don’t think my wife would like that !”

“Oh come on, “ Elizabeth insisted. She was very pretty, very sexy, and persuasive   …I was weak. “Well ok, “ I said, “ but my wife won’t like it!”

After a few restorative brandies and some creative and putting lessons, I thanked my host, “ I feel better now, but i know my wife is going to be really upset!”

Don’t be silly!” Elizabeth said with a smile. “She won’t know anything. By the way, where is she?”

“Under the cart…”  I said!




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