To add some humour...

[Host Jazzbeau]

But wait, there's more!

 

 

[Host Jazzbeau]

And possibly the best collection of Indian Hills puns ever:

 

 

[John&LaLa]

Two guys grow up together, but after college one moves to Georgia and the other to California.  They agree to meet every ten years in Florida to play golf and catch up with each other.

At age 32 they meet, finish their round of golf and head for lunch.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why Hooters?"

"They have those servers with the big boobs, the tight shorts and the
gorgeous legs."

"You're on."

At age 42, they meet and play golf again "Where you wanna go for lunch?"

"Hooters."

"Again?  Why?"

"They have cold beer, big screen TVs, and side action on the games."

"OK."

At age 52 they meet and play again. "So where you wanna go for lunch?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"The food is pretty good and there's plenty of parking."

"OK."

At age 62 they meet again.  After a round of golf, one says, "Where
you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"Wings are half price and the food isn't too spicy."

"Good choice"

At age 72 they meet again.  Once again, after a round of golf, one
says, "Where shall we go for lunch?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"They have six handicapped parking spaces right by the door and they
have senior discounts."

"Great choice."

At age 82 they meet and play again.  "Where should we go for lunch?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"Because we've never been there before."

“Okay, let’s give it a try."

[centurycruiser]

1 hour ago, Host Jazzbeau said:

But wait, there's more!

 

 

I cannot believe all these signs are created by ONE guy. He is phenomenal!

[centurycruiser]

1 hour ago, Host Jazzbeau said:

And possibly the best collection of Indian Hills puns ever:

 

 

489 pages and this is the best yet! Thanks Hostbeau.

[centurycruiser]

[centurycruiser]

[Host Jazzbeau]

[centurycruiser]

[MrsTravelBug]

[MrsTravelBug]

[reallyitsmema]

[MrsTravelBug]

[centurycruiser]

[MrsTravelBug]

[reallyitsmema]

[Host Jazzbeau]

[reallyitsmema]

[lovelife]

[jagsfan]

[MrsTravelBug]

 

 

[MrsTravelBug]

[BND]

[John&LaLa]

My husband and I went through the McDonald's driveway window and I gave the cashier a $5 bill.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her 25c.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.'
I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar back.'
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the 25c, and said 'We're sorry but we don’t do that kind of thing.'
The cashier then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change.
Do not confuse the people at MacD's.

 

We had to have the garage door repaired.
The repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'You need a 1/4 horsepower.'
I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used that repairman since...

 

I live in a semi rural area.
We recently had a new neighbor call the local city council office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.

The reason: 'Too many deers are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE.

My daughter went to a Mexican fast food and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

 

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

 

The pedestrian light on the corner beeps when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an 'intellectually challenged' co-worker of mine.
She asked if I knew what the beeper was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'what on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She is a government employee.....

 

When my wife and I arrived at a car dealership to pick up our car after a 
service, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door.
As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
‘Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!'
His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.'

STAY ALERT!

 

They walk among us, they breed, and they complain about stupid stuff

Edited November 3, 2020 by John&LaLa

[Host Jazzbeau]