GeeDunk Posted November 28, 2021 #22076 Share Posted November 28, 2021 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alibaba1 Posted November 28, 2021 #22077 Share Posted November 28, 2021 My absolute favorite: A skeleton walks into a bar and says to the bartender: "I'll have a beer and a mop" 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovelife Posted November 28, 2021 #22078 Share Posted November 28, 2021 5 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CruzDayz Posted November 28, 2021 #22079 Share Posted November 28, 2021 1 hour ago, GeeDunk said: She must have borrowed that sweatshirt.🙂 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
centurycruiser Posted November 29, 2021 #22080 Share Posted November 29, 2021 3 hours ago, alibaba1 said: My absolute favorite: A skeleton walks into a bar and says to the bartender: "I'll have a beer and a mop" A skeleton walks into a bar and says to the bartender: " I'll have a beer." The bartender says: "I can't serve you. You can't hold your liquor." 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted November 29, 2021 #22081 Share Posted November 29, 2021 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted November 29, 2021 #22082 Share Posted November 29, 2021 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted November 29, 2021 #22083 Share Posted November 29, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CSHS1979 Posted November 29, 2021 #22084 Share Posted November 29, 2021 Creation Explained 1. In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. 2. Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled. 3. And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14. 4. So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side . And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. 5. God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them. And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. 6. God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food Cake" and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food." 7 . God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds. 8 . Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds . 9 . God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super-size them!" And Satan said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest. 10 . God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. 11. Then Satan created the Health Care System. 6 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted November 30, 2021 #22085 Share Posted November 30, 2021 2 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted November 30, 2021 #22086 Share Posted November 30, 2021 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted November 30, 2021 #22087 Share Posted November 30, 2021 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted November 30, 2021 #22088 Share Posted November 30, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crown Vic Posted November 30, 2021 #22089 Share Posted November 30, 2021 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diver2014 Posted December 1, 2021 #22090 Share Posted December 1, 2021 Knock, knock. Who’s there? A little old lady. A little old lady who? I had no idea you could yodel. 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhoenixCruiser Posted December 1, 2021 #22091 Share Posted December 1, 2021 7 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhoenixCruiser Posted December 1, 2021 #22092 Share Posted December 1, 2021 3 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhoenixCruiser Posted December 1, 2021 #22093 Share Posted December 1, 2021 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhoenixCruiser Posted December 1, 2021 #22094 Share Posted December 1, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted December 1, 2021 #22095 Share Posted December 1, 2021 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted December 1, 2021 #22096 Share Posted December 1, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted December 1, 2021 #22097 Share Posted December 1, 2021 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VegasVic14 Posted December 1, 2021 #22098 Share Posted December 1, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sandebeach Posted December 1, 2021 #22099 Share Posted December 1, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crown Vic Posted December 1, 2021 #22100 Share Posted December 1, 2021 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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