Jane I have a fashion favor

[livelife]

Hello my fashion queen. You may or may not recall I recently had another surgery couple weeks ago, yes Im a total basket case right now, hoping to get to Vegas again in Febuary in the meantime my self esteem has taken a huge nose dive to about 2 % image left. I lost more weight and as of today Im 85 1/2 pounds, Ive also undergone some personal tragedies in my family, and Im going through surgical menopause due to having to remove all my female organs to try to help my nuerogenic bladder, hey Im down to only wearing my diaper at night thank God. When I read your mtg with the ladies in NY, oh I wished I was there and you could have all wheeled me around town shopping. I need help hon, I just dont dress nice anymore, black pants make me look anorexic and I LOVE black, I did buy a nice cashmere red sweater, and nice blouse (white) with thin small ruffled edges down the front to give me some body. Im down to wearing my american Eagle drawstring pants 90% of the time, or a pair of super small beige cords. Please give me some ideas I want to look smart again. Im very pale right now, but dont seem to want to wear bright colors drawing attention to my size, as often women (mainly grown mature woemn in 40s on up, feel the need to stare at me or make comments when hubby takes me shopping, I cannot imagine me saying the things thtat women say to me to them, no class.

 

Any help in how to layer and stil be comfortable in my clothes physicaly wise. I do still wear my lipstick when out most the time, but my undereye circles are terrible right now and I acutally dont want to be phsycial seen by people currently.

 

thankyou dear I have always valued your practical fashion sense. Im sitting here crying right now that I lost another half a pound this week, DYING really really sucks when you can barly swallow. Im afirad if we go to Vegas again I will just hide under baggy sweats so no one will point at me anymore.

 

Luv and hugs I LVOE NY for shopping, its been years.

 

Live Life

[jp2001]

Good morning Livelife,

I know your post is for Jane but I just wanted to say that the people making comments are the ones who have problems, not you.

Don't pay attention to rude people, even if you're wearing your sweat pants and baggy shirts and if you decide to do an effort to dress nicely, good for you, I hope it makes you a little happier and your confidence level will go up (you're such a nice person, believe in yourself).

I'm sure you can dress nicely if it's what you want. I think cords are a good idea and other textures too. If you have trouble to find small clothes, and if you are not too tall, you can try kids stores, they often have nice clothes for teens. a blouse + a sweater or a tank top + a jacket on top can be good options too.

You're a fantastic person, don't let anyone affect you with comments when they don't even know what you're going through.

[momofmeg]

Good morning Livelife,

I know your post is for Jane but I just wanted to say that the people making comments are the ones who have problems, not you.

Don't pay attention to rude people, even if you're wearing your sweat pants and baggy shirts and if you decide to do an effort to dress nicely, good for you, I hope it makes you a little happier and your confidence level will go up (you're such a nice person, believe in yourself).

I'm sure you can dress nicely if it's what you want. I think cords are a good idea and other textures too. If you have trouble to find small clothes, and if you are not too tall, you can try kids stores, they often have nice clothes for teens. a blouse + a sweater or a tank top + a jacket on top can be good options too.

You're a fantastic person, don't let anyone affect you with comments when they don't even know what you're going through.

 

I agree, Dawn, those people are jerks.

 

I saw a young woman I guess to be in her early thirties, in a wheelchair on my cruise, when I saw this young woman I thought of you-she also had a very loving husband/SO who took very good care of her. I beleive she must be thinner then you because she was thinner then Meg and Meg only weighs 80 pounds -so less then you. This young woman was beautiful and her hubby-the way he looked at her-you could tell he loved her very much.

 

I know how hard it is for Meg to find clothes that fit. She wears a double zero which is very hard to find-so I can't be much help there-but I can emphasize with you.

 

Just remember-for people like that-that are many, many more-who see your beauty and may even feel a little envious that your husband obviously loves you very much.

[livelife]

thankyou jp, I dont mind you read my post, the fact you responded because you care and are nice meant the world to me today:) . I can wear the kids tops and pants size wise 14, but Im too tall for most of it 5ft3, tops are easiest to find, I do have a nice terry black drawstring pants and matching jacket I bought this summer and wore alot, they have little rhinestones on the jacket and you wouldnt know at all its a kids set, the pants are quite long for kids so I was really happy about that. Im sure tommorow my pre op appt will help so I can get biopsy results (testing organs for cancer) and that is adding to my stress. Texture does look good on me, I have a darling tweed jacket with antique looking buttons (they look like oldfashioned jewels) in gold, and I got skinny jeans that dont! look skinny on me just straight, but not sure how to wear those longish tops over it without looking like a stick.

 

I feel better today and I must say its nice at least not having female cramps anymore, my stomache is so flat you wouldnt even be able to tell I just had major abdominal surgery a few weeks ago (I thought it might help make my waist in pants bigger:D , dummy that I am). I feel for all women struggeling with thier weight be it too little or too large, I wish women were taught to accept thier bodies, me included.

 

Have a fun halloween if you celebrate. My youngest is gonig to her FIRST real dance today right after school, shes a PIRATE for her costume. I have kitty cat ears to wear on my head, Im normaly a nuerosurgeon but this year I want NOTHING to do with surgeons,ha,ha,ha,ha.

 

hugs

Live Life

[MrsMoose2001]

Good morning Livelife,

I know your post is for Jane but I just wanted to say that the people making comments are the ones who have problems, not you.

Don't pay attention to rude people, even if you're wearing your sweat pants and baggy shirts and if you decide to do an effort to dress nicely, good for you, I hope it makes you a little happier and your confidence level will go up (you're such a nice person, believe in yourself).

I'm sure you can dress nicely if it's what you want. I think cords are a good idea and other textures too. If you have trouble to find small clothes, and if you are not too tall, you can try kids stores, they often have nice clothes for teens. a blouse + a sweater or a tank top + a jacket on top can be good options too.

You're a fantastic person, don't let anyone affect you with comments when they don't even know what you're going through.

 

What a lovely post JP and I wholehartedly agree with all that you wrote.

 

I know this is for Jane, but I too want to add, don't let other people's nastiness and their bitterness affect you. You are a class act and don't let anyone make you feel less than that.

 

I think JP offered great advice and can't think of a thing to add re clothing, other than wear what makes you happy and what you like and don't worry about what other people think. If you want color, go for it, if you want black, go for it. Life is way way to short to worry about what other people think of what's on your back.

 

I hope you continue to have a good recovery.

 

As for NYC shopping, you didn't miss much, it's stressful and tireing and just getting around the city is getting harder and harder. NYC makes shopping work not even fun for the most part with the massive crowds. So don't feel too depressed. I hear Vegas has stores that are as good if not better than NYC.

 

Happy Halloween and try to cheer up please remember who you are and rise above all the bitterness from those nasty people.

[Jane110]

Hi Jo,

 

I'm so sorry to read about your recent surgery's. My sincerest wishes for easy recovery's.

 

I'm glad you have a trip tp Vegas planned. What fun!

Like the others have said, forget about the rude people. It's their problem, not yours. I know it's hard to ignore sometimes, but the truth is many people are just plain idiots.

 

I think the key to fashion for you is soft, pretty layering in easy pieces that are not too fitted and very soft with not too many seams, buttons or zippers. This season, layering is back and just perfect for you. I know you like to look elegant so look for some cashmere pieces as well as some washable boucle's. Ruffled edges, asymmetrical closings, rusched collars, etc are all nice details that are as easy to wear as some plain ol' cotton sweats.

 

Las Vegas can be quite chilly and the casino's are overly air conditioned.

A colorful, soft scarf will look pretty and keep a chill off your neck. Or a drapey, creme colored one, wrapped and knotted if you wear a colorful top adds a nice touch. (probably gorgeous with your tweed jacket) My neck is one of the first things that gets chilled so I'm the scarf queen. LOL!

 

A big knit boucle tunic with a big, droopy collar or a soft cable knit tunic would look great over your skinny jeans! Keep away from V-necks as they'll make you look thinner - with a pretty knit scarf used a a "filler" at the neckline they can look pretty too.

 

I have some nice cashmere pieces from Vince. However, they make alot of black and grey which you shouldn't buy too much of.

Here are some of their pieces in Saks, they have their own dept in Bergdor's so they probably sell in Neiman Marcus too.

 

http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/search/EndecaSearch.jsp?bmForm=endeca_search_form_one&bmFormID=1162310051459&bmUID=1162310051459&bmIsForm=true&bmPrevTemplate=%2FEntry.jsp&bmText=SearchString&SearchString=Vince&bmSingle=N&N=0&bmImage=EndecaSearch.x&bmImage=EndecaSearch.y&bmImage=EndecaSearch&bmHidden=Ntt&Ntt=Vince&bmHidden=Ntk&Ntk=Entire+Site&bmHidden=Ntx&Ntx=mode%2Bmatchpartialmax&bmHidden=prp8&prp8=t15&bmHidden=prp13&prp13=&bmHidden=sid&sid=10E9F13E7D01&bmHidden=ASSORTMENT%3C%3East_id&ASSORTMENT%3C%3East_id=1408474395222441&EndecaSearch.x=13&EndecaSearch.y=5

 

 

 

Have a look at these pieces from the Eileen Fisher petite line. They have a travel line with a great skirt and a great pair of pants that are both comfy and pretty. Easy to pair with lots of nice tops.

 

http://www.eileenfisher.com/scripts/ecatalogisapi.dll/group9?group=140658768&Template=9990000001040050

 

 

 

Also, Nordstrom has some very reasonably priced cashmere's

 

http://shop.nordstrom.com/C/2379261/0~2376776~2374327~2379261?cm_mmc=email-_-103106-_-general_cashmere-_-cashmere_women

 

Wear color! Don't be drab! Wear the red lipstick!

Look fabulous!

 

Blessings to you,

Jane

[momofmeg]

thankyou jp, I dont mind you read my post, the fact you responded because you care and are nice meant the world to me today:) . I can wear the kids tops and pants size wise 14, but Im too tall for most of it 5ft3, tops are easiest to find, I do have a nice terry black drawstring pants and matching jacket I bought this summer and wore alot, they have little rhinestones on the jacket and you wouldnt know at all its a kids set, the pants are quite long for kids so I was really happy about that. Im sure tommorow my pre op appt will help so I can get biopsy results (testing organs for cancer) and that is adding to my stress. Texture does look good on me, I have a darling tweed jacket with antique looking buttons (they look like oldfashioned jewels) in gold, and I got skinny jeans that dont! look skinny on me just straight, but not sure how to wear those longish tops over it without looking like a stick.

 

I feel better today and I must say its nice at least not having female cramps anymore, my stomache is so flat you wouldnt even be able to tell I just had major abdominal surgery a few weeks ago (I thought it might help make my waist in pants bigger:D , dummy that I am). I feel for all women struggeling with thier weight be it too little or too large, I wish women were taught to accept thier bodies, me included.

 

Have a fun halloween if you celebrate. My youngest is gonig to her FIRST real dance today right after school, shes a PIRATE for her costume. I have kitty cat ears to wear on my head, Im normaly a nuerosurgeon but this year I want NOTHING to do with surgeons,ha,ha,ha,ha.

 

hugs

Live Life

 

Dawn,

Meg takes a 12 slim in girl's sizes and she does buy some at Limited II-she is 5'1"-so sometimes they work-but other times they are too short-that is what is good about capris I guess-they come in all lengths between the knee and ankles. So as long as the pants don't bell out-they can pass as capris-sometimes.

 

Recently Meg actually bought a pair of slacks in a size 3-but we believe they were marked wrong-because they fit her and didn't swamp her-although she had to have about 7 inches cut off the length of them!

 

Meg has a nice little figure-just scaled down-and she tries to buy things to show she is a woman-because if she wears loose fitting stuff-people think she is like 12. She does wear a lot of shrugs over camis-as they show she has a bustline.

 

Since you wear a 14 in girls-maybe if you could find some size zero's that would work for you. Have you ever tried wearing a size zero? I know there are not many around but maybe that would be a good fit for you.

 

I know also we have a Petite's Sophisticates store in our local mall. Meg does not like them because this store is more for small professionial women-lot's of two piece professional suits etc. but that would work for you- I would think- and they do have size zero in those stores.

 

 

Janie

[livelife]

well thankyou thankyou thankyou, didnt expect such heartwarming and helpful ideas and so much compassion. We live to far away from our Mall for me to get to easily so It has to be an event so to speak where my oldest drives me or my husband and hes too busy, however this morning he did take me for a starbucks and tjmaxx down the street. Well I found a nice outfit to wear on Christmas day (lounge type) its a kids size 14 and its the SAME brand as the things I got this summer (BCGB) with the little rhinestones on the jacket and the pants at the top, its deep red Velvet and the length in the pants was perfect, acutally too long for most kids who would wear those, so I was VERY happy to find at least one outfit with color AND sparkle, I was so happy that I called Kelly (my CC friend I made in our floataway group who lives near me and weve gotten together, I called her and said" Guess what I found something!,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha. We also found me a pair of XXS Black super soft fleece pants with drawstring and white fleece pullover, all casual but some brights and the red outfit is just glorious and really give me a fuller look with the loose boot cut pants.

 

Jane my husband loves Saks its his favorite, maybe he can take me there soon. Janie we dont have our Petite Sophisticate anylonger (our mall was torn down and will be rebuilt by 2008) and yes I used to buy there in a size 4-6 when I was healthier and they DO have size 0. Right now I have one size 0 grey pants and one size 0 beige cords and 3 XXS drawstring american Eagle pants and straight leg jeans that are a 0 also but way too big right now, so I wore them with a belt last week, they still hung off my fanny though and showed my undies (YUCK!!!!!) I hate that, maybe I will keep them and they will be in style next year (doubt it). Meg sounds like a DOLL, just like her mother. Mrs Moose, your additude is much like mine, but I feel so whimpy latley, thats not like me, I think my hormones are totally out of whack and tommorow Im begging my GYN for some help, I dont care if I have to take some sort of natural hormone (even though Im not supposed to) this is just too hard on me with all I ahve going on, hell Id take an anti depressant if it will help and THAT IS REALLY!!!! not like me but this crying ****(sorry) is for the birds)

 

Jane 101 Im going to try on some outfits tonight at home and try putting things togehter in layers, it used to take me 10 minutes to pickout clothes for performing, for meetings, for concerts as a pianist or vocalist and now I sit here like a lump confused at how to put anything on. Im thikning of having some pretty burgundy color added to my dark hair, I have green/gold/brown eyes) and thought it might perk up my skin color , what do you all think?????.

 

thanks sooo much, I even cried when I read your posts, Im pathetic.

 

Love

Live Life

[spotcat]

Hi LiveLife,

 

I am so sorry for what you are going through. Two things really helped me when I was going through chemo, facing surgery and feeling weepy. A new haircut that was easier to take care of and some new make-up made me feel somewhat less unattractive. Every little bit helps when you are down!

 

If you live too far from a mall, you might have an Avon, Mary Kay, or Jafra rep who would be happy to help you out.

 

Take care and please do not let rude people ruin your day.

 

Sharon

[jp2001]

Good morning Livelife,

Your post has touched me even more than I thought because I dreamt of you!!!

It's funny because I don't even know what you look like but I made a dream and it was ''you'' in my dream. You were very thin and looked tired but you were beautiful with a little smile. I couldn't see your husband but I know he was there because you were looking at him.

You were in a mall and you had a shopping bag, I'm sure you had found a piece of clothing that made you happy.

I smiled back to you.

I usually don't dream about people I don't know very well (not even coworkers or the like), for me it's usually, family, friends or total strangers who are in my dreams.

I hope your feeling better today and I hope you will get well very soon.

Take care,

JP

[Jane110]

LiveLife/Dawn,

 

Sounds like you've gotten some wonderful things. The burgundy BCBG outfit sounds just perfect!

 

I kind of like the idea of the burgundy highlights.....as long as they're very subtle. Since it's not a color that anyone would have naturally, I think it's probably best that they're done in very small highlights (ie just a few hairs at a time) that add a little color aura around you just when the light hits right. Might be just perfect to add some color to your complexion!

 

Don't fret about how long it takes you to put outfits together. When you were performing, you probably had your looks "down" pat. Whenever we change our styles, whether it's fashion, hair or make-up, it's always a bit daunting at first because I think we feel like we're putting on someone else's look. It doesn't feel like our own yet. It's not "second nature", so it's always overwhelming until it becomes a natural part of our repetoire. After a few great outfits, it'll feel like "you" and other looks will fall into place naturally.

 

Keep us posted and have fun with it.

 

Jane

[MrsMoose2001]

Please do not say you are pathetic. Not at all.

 

As you know from my other posts I was in NYC and had some docs appts. For my "physical" I had to have a blood test done. As I had chemo my veins are shot and dried up and the tech couldn't get a vein. She said "I'll have to take it in the hand". I said NO. I had this done once when on chemo as I had no choice, and they ran out of veins (not dried up yet) but for this I would have chosen not to have the test and let it go. I started crying like a kid. A grown woman with her DH standing next to her holding her hand like a 5 year old now that is what I call pathetic maybe.

 

The supervisor came and calmed me down and did the test in the arm but I was sitting there squeezing DH hand just like a 5 year old. Am I embarssed not in the least. Am I ashamed, NO. So why do you think you are pathetic. After all you have been though, I would say you are anything BUT pathetic.

 

You are a courageous lady who exudes grace, has a wonderful sense of humor, makes other laugh, inspires people, makes a difference in people's lives, and is a champion for the right causes. Your beauty comes across on the screen. Your warmth and compassion is tenfold.

 

It is thanks to people like you who have rallied and fought for people who may have special needs. You think of others regardless of your personal problems.

 

My dear lady, you are certainly not pathetic.

 

I hope you find the clothes you want, but please remember regardless of what you wear, you are truely beautiful. True beauty shines through the fabric and the makeup and for sure yours will shine though like the brightest stars in the sky.

 

I hope you are more cheered up today and having a great day and feeling better.

[bobby'sgirl]

Great words Mrs. Moose. On my way out the door. Again, luvlife, hope your day is better!!

[momofmeg]

Great words Mrs. Moose. On my way out the door. Again' date=' luvlife, hope your day is better!![/quote']

 

Hey Dawn, that would be a great name for you, luvlife, Bobby's girl was typing fast and typed how she sees you I think-as that fits you!

 

so from now on you will be Livelife/luvlife!!!/Dawn!!!!

 

Janie

[Jane110]

Yes, great words MrsMoose!

[bobby'sgirl]

dawn sorry for the confusion re your board name. i quess as MOM states, that's how I see you! Must be my old nursing days coming forward. You would have been great fun to work with~ Now I have the pleasure of having you as a cyber pal.

[livelife]

thanks all of you, and bobbys girl no problem I like that name too:) because I really do luv life!, people will often say to me" wow I coudlnt do what you do I think I would just have to go:eek: , WOW that always amazes me that someone would de-value my life just because THEY couldnt handle it, well I always say back" I didnt fight this hard to jsut lay down and die no matter how hard it gets, so guess what no matter how worthless I can feel some days, its still my choice to continue because Im sure someone on this earth values my presence no matter what shape Im in.

 

GREAT news, Biopsies were clean!!!! all the female organs, all the grwoths were Endometriosis yipeeee:D . Today I bought a top at Antrhopolgy, its sooo cute with a tie at the neck and blousen look in soft colors with red flecks in it, going to waer it with my dark jean skirt (just above knees) and my brown boots, my daguhter really loved it on me so I got it, as I trust her opion on such things.

 

Im no fashion plate, but I do love when you put sometthing on that makes you feel marvelous.

 

hugs and LOve

Life Life, Luv Life

[jp2001]

I'm SO HAPPY for you that you got good news from the biopsies!

WOW, what a great day it must be for you!

[Jane110]

 

GREAT news, Biopsies were clean!!!! all the female organs, all the grwoths were Endometriosis yipeeee:D .

 

GREAT!!!!

 

I'm so happy to hear that!

 

 

Today I bought a top at Antrhopolgy, its sooo cute with a tie at the neck and blousen look in soft colors with red flecks in it, going to waer it with my dark jean skirt (just above knees) and my brown boots, my daguhter really loved it on me so I got it, as I trust her opion on such things.

 

 

 

Anthropology is one of my favorite stores. They have such great things!

 

Enjoy your your top. It sounds just perfect!

[MrsMoose2001]

Hi,

 

I wrote to you in the other thread but I'll say it again here, Congrats ont he "all clear" I'm so happy for you. I love good news, and that is just the best news.

 

I hope you wear all your new things in the best of health and happiness.

Enjoy!!!