Gathina

NO-40's -people don't have a sense of decorum anymore.

People seem to have no sense or pride anymore in how they carry themselves. Many people even look like they don't take a shower or even bother to comb their hair.

LOL..love this comment about the flour sack.

I thought Shapwear..face it--it's really a girdle--was to "smooth out" as you said, if you are already wearing the right size of clothing-not to force the clothing to fit.

It's a hard reality check but there are some outfits some of us are just not meant to be wearing. Kinda like "skinny" jeans on someone who is not physically built for them.

I find places like Nordstrom are the best places to buy that sort of thing-I had a friend who worked in the lingerie department there for years and they actually had to attend classes on how to advise customers on different articles, and when I bought shape wear for my wedding I learned a lot from the clerk as far as what was appropriate, etc.

cb at sea is correct. You can't put 20 pounds of flour into a 10-pound sack. That said, I do wear quite a bit of shapewear and find it helpful, primarily for minimizing/eliminating bra lines and for smoothing things out around my waist. And yes, it's important to buy the appropriate size.

Oh no doubt there-she kept trying to "play it cool" and be polite when she was making all the comments-I just "knew" it was the right thing to do.

Which reminds me for all those waging war on closets-I have a lot of teens in my life and I'm learning they love the opportunity to take stuff off your hands-there is a consignment store just for teens in our area and it's a huge hit so don't overlook purging to some of the fashionista teens out there. Someone had also recommended donating some of my old school fur coats to the local drama group from the college for costumes,etc

The story about your office mate daughter is so cute. I bet she just loves the purse.

Wow-that's progress! Congrats!

CowPrincess I fear I may have to do another shoe detox again-not that I have many at the moment-but for the work I do I get to go to Italy (Bologna) and Austria (Salzburg). The trips are about a month apart and I'm thinking, "hey, I have a computer and a phone" why not hang at my friend's house in the UK for the month in between and save $$??" I've been to Italy before but didn't buy any shoes-and seeing I'm only trying to buy really decent shoes now- ya know.

My next detox is going to be accessories-as in a ton of purses-and odds/ends of jewelry and watches, sunglasses, etc. I have some perfumes too-which will go to my office mate's teen daughter. I had a tiny coach purse out when she was helping me organize stuff one day and I saw her eyes bug out but she was trying to be so polite. She kept saying "oh my this is such a cute purse, so practical" etc. When she was done helping me I told her "You know, I was going to just throw it out, why don't you just take it?". Her jaw dropped open and she quietly said thanks. I'm sure her cell phone blew up as soon as she left me that day :)

Gathina, the detox continues, but I am working on it :D

 

JanineM, I couldn't bear to part with so many of my cashmere sweaters, even though some of them had sat unworn for years and years. What has worked quite well for me is I pulled all the ones that I knew I hadn't worn, and put them in storage tubs in a "spare" :rolleyes: closet. And ID'd 5 (I think...) that were to be donated RIGHT NOW. So the tubs of sweaters have been unseen, stored away (and actually forgotten!) for months. I found them on Tues, I think. I feel no emotional attachment to them at ALL now, and they will be finding new homes through ebay and Etsy and friends who can wear them. I think there are 16 now that I have ZERO hesitation about releasing to the universe. (plus the 5 that left immediately).

Ask CowPrincess about her detox from the Cashmere sweaters!

No suggestions but for me it was disgust at how much I was being wasteful, added to the harsh reality I had gained a disgusting amount of weight and there was nobody to blame but me. When I saw the crap for clothes they were selling at Kohls, etc. and the crap prices the issue wasn't having anything to wear, the issue was me.

I can tell you having a clean, organized closet reduces a lot of stress and taking care of the clothes I do have-like actually caring for them the way the labels say to-repairing shoes I once loved and replacing only with quality-it frees up a lot of time for other stuff. It's easier to get ready for work, less frustration, etc. For my clothes I even bought all the right "care products", better quality detergent, fine washables bag, a good iron, magic sizing, using a clotheline,etc.

After reading this thread earlier in the year, I decided that I needed to begin to at least THINK about getting rid of a massive amount of clothes.

 

So at the beginning of July I took all of my tops (that's my danger zone) and hung the hangers backwards. If I wore an item (actually WORE it - not tried it on), the hanger was turned around.

 

Now about 10 weeks later, I have actually worn about 15% of my tops (that's about 12 tops in total).

 

I am trying to gather strength to clear out everything I didn't wear this summer. It would be so nice to open up the closet and just see things that I love (and fit).

 

Encouragement/suggestions welcomed :)

I agree-but keep in mind you forfeit your right to complain if people look at you-even if keep their comments to themselves-and that does NOT mean they are "cross dress phobic".

It doesn't matter what people think-if you are comfortable why would you care what others think?That's the main point

If you are outlandish and call attention to yourself -- you will get attention. If you just do it and "blend" in-- who cares? Some folks probably will be a little up tight with it but mostly nobody cares what you do or how you dress. They pay attention to themselves and the attention they are getting. It's a big ship and you will never see these people again so what do you care what they think?

 

If you are on one of my cruises, please don't be too outlandish. I get the giggles easily and I sometimes stare just because it is interesting and entertaining! No offense met. I stare at straights that are interesting and entertaining too!

32 pairs of Ferragamos..gasp..keep those in the family!

Bless you for being so generous to make a difference n someone's life. You'll reap back in some way in your life, no doubt!

The formal dresses-in my area there is an association that deals with foster children and they take formal dresses and use them for prom dresses,etc. for teens who are in foster care, there may be an option like that in your area. I have seen quite a bit of formals in consignment stores too-in fact my Maid of Honor in my wedding 2 years ago bought Cache gown worn only once for $50, had it altered and it was the perfect MOH dress.

Just found this thread & my local Dressed for Success organization is thrilled that I did. I was a protocol officer (event coordinator) for USAF for 30 years, wore a suit & heels every day to work. I love good clothes & took care of them. I knew I had many suits (we turned a guest room into my "closet"), but I'd never really counted them. This thread inspired me & I went on an almost total suit purge. I brought 72 suits to Dressed for Success, only one had tags on it. I kept 1 black, 1 white & 1 navy suit. They gave me a rather large donation slip for taxes (didn't expect that)

 

Next up is the formal wear purge (I have even more formal outfits than suits, lots of formal events in protocol) & shoe (heel) purge. My girls are already discussing who gets the (32 pairs) of Ferragamos (all 3 of us wear the same size shoe). Melody

 

 

 

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Ask CowPrincess about how she is detoxing from her cashmere sweaters!

I've noticed in Europe women have very small closets-and I think when you have less it forces you to be more mindful/resourceful. When you think about it most of us have a giant closet stuffed with clothes and we still wear the same 5 or 6 outfits regularly. I know with having less, for me, it's less stressful to choose what to wear, in a sense.

Now my next issue is my wedding gown-I got married 2 years ago-I love my wedding gown-but there will be no children to pass it onto, and I saw an ad about a woman who takes wedding gowns and makes beautiful burial "gowns" for families who have sadly lost a baby, and she calls them "angel gowns", and they are free to the family. I'm thinking this might be the way to go, but again, it's an emotional thing. She can get 4-5 angel gowns out of a wedding dress. What a loving thing to do. I'm just not there yet..

OMG! I can't tell you how therapeutic this thread is for me. I thought I was the only person who dealt with these issues and the emotions that go along with them. I'm pretty good about cleaning out my closet and donating the items. However, I think I sometimes put it off because of the guilt I feel when I do it - does anyone else understand this feeling? I guess I feel guilty because I paid good $$ for an item, and here I am throwing it out. Although I do try to wear items and get my money's worth out of each one. I also know that I'll need to replace worn out pieces of clothing that I'm donating which requires me to go shopping. I guess I'm one of the few women in the world who actually dread this activity. I get frustrated when I go to the store because I feel like I just buy the same old boring type clothes each time. I don't exactly have an eye for fashion either. I'm an Executive Assistant to a CEO, so most of my outfits consist of black pants with a nice blouse/cardigan/jacket to go with it. It's also frustrating to see most of the clothes in the stores geared toward the 20-something crowd. I'm in my mid 40s and it seems like a challenge to find something stylish, age appropriate, and something that covers up everything! The one thing I have absolutely NO problem shopping for is costume jewelry - Charming Charlie and Versona are my faves!! My husband says he's going to have to add on to the house so I'll have a place for my jewelry - LOL!!

CowPrincess- I'm in Washington state on business this week-actually one one of the Puget sound islands-and when I finished today I wandered into a thrift shop near my hotel and they had multiple pairs of Ferregamo shoes, for---gasp--$5.00 and they were like new. I about had a heart attack but they were size 8 and I am a 10. I wanted to add them to my select shoes selection-I finally got down to 10 pairs but thank Goodness they didn't fit!

All my closets officially purged-it only took 8 months, now working on closet "organizing" thanks to the rod breaking. Now slowly sneaking into the storage closet outside to organize that when husband isn't home!

Gathina, email me at nakitathedog@yahoo.ca and I'll give you the name. It is empty right now ;) but I'm pretty motivated, so I expect by mid-August it'll have decent stock in it.

Cowprincess, what's the name of your Etsy shop??

Are you the sister from that old picture we found of my dad in WWII with a beautiful woman on the beach in Italy? LOL (joke)..love Vintage clothing-found a summer short dress from the 1960's at Goodwill for $7 and I wear it faithfully so that stays in the closet.

Let me know when your shop is up..agree..Etsy is a cut above.

The Fendis were not at all casual ;) . I had them in a bag for 3 or 4 months before I "did the deed", and I'd take them out every few days and think about it.....

 

Re Etsy -- I like it a lot better than ebay for selling certain things. Now that I have a functioning camera (YAY!) I'll be reopening my shop there for vintage clothing and jewelry. Some stuff is just too high-dollar-value to give away. I wish you great success!

A dozen "angel gowns" can be made from one wedding dress. What a lovely idea.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2590022/Crafting-angel-gowns-wedding-dresses-Meet-women-create-special-garments-babies-pass-away-soon.html

Welcome to the party-your just in time! :) Never tardy to the party when it comes to waging war on stuff we don't need!

I've heard about that hanger strategy-would love to know if it's actually helpful as I've considered it. Would love to read your blog too.

I saw a link to a group that takes wedding dresses that are donated and makes christening gowns and even gowns for (sadly) children who have had an untimely death. What a great idea for a wedding dress, but I'm not ready to part with mine yet either.

I'm late to the party. I've generally done a good clean-out about once a year, but I still have three entire closets full of clothes & shoes, plus about 3 big plastic bins in the attic. I like everything I have - last year I got rid of all of the really old stuff, save for a couple of sentimental items like my wedding dress.

 

I have three sizes of clothes. Last year I bit the bullet and got rid of the 6s and 8s because they probably won't be that size time soon, and if I am that stuff will all be out of style. But I am bound and determined to be back into the 10s by the time I'm wearing sweaters again this fall, so I'm not willing to get rid of a lot of things.

 

Today I turned all the hangers backwards in my main closet (current season clothes). If I wear the item, the hanger gets turned around the 'right' way. I'll go through the clothes after Labour Day and that not worn is going to Goodwill or a consignment store. I really love most of this stuff ... but the sad thing is that there must be 7 or 8 tops that have never been worn. I loved them enough to buy them, but then I don't wear them?

 

This de-cluttering, re-organizing, living mindfully thing is my focus for the next while - enough that it's going to be a primary subject on my blog.

NO! Not the Fendi's! And you make it sound so casual :) LOL

I am in the process of starting an ETSY shop-just trying to figure out the shipping, etc. I'm selling mostly mid century stuff.

5 sweaters donated, a PILE identified to be sold on Etsy, and 2 more pairs of shoes (you are gonna cry with me on these -- Bally and Fendi) donated.

 

:D

I love Marks and Spencer and shop from them online and in the UK all the time.

However, keep in mind they won't ship a lot of the cosmetic items (am a huge fan of the many skin products they offer) and perfumes due to customs/immigration policies in the USA. Maybe it's different in Canada or beyond.

Well I finally finished "waging war" on my home office/computer room-I started that project on Dec. 26 and finally finished it off today-sickening the "overload" of office supplies I had, books I didn't know what to do with, etc. No,it wasn't clothes but it was the clothes war that led to the other parts of the house.

Now I'm working on decorating it so I can have a comfy "she cave"-I repainted bookshelves and papered the shelves, a vintage Woodard iron painted white became a lovely writing table, floor kitchen cabinets were turned into a credenza, a repurposed chair from Goodwill steam cleaned is my reading nook in front of the window. Almost everything I a decorating with came from the "war"on the other closets.

It only took 7 months!!! But it's done. Wage on, ladies! :)

See...LOL..now you'll "reap" somewhere in life because you sowed into someone else's :)

This did me good today. I took a small load to the thrift store, and there was a woman there also making donations. She was just about the PERFECT size for some of my cashmere sweaters, so I offered them to her. She was nearly speechless with appreciation :)

For me it was my wedding and it was the first time in my life I had been TRULY heavy and when I faced reality it was awful, but I did lose close to 60 lbs and had my wedding dress taken in 6 inches-not enough time to buy another one-but I've kept the weight off for 2 years. The weird thing was that I never was a junk eater-I ate healthy-just too much of healthy foods-grains/beans/fruit and I had to learn how to measure portion sizes. I think people as a rule view food as an enemy and not a friend and a lot of it is how you perceive food. I haven't tested this theory, but I think if most people just took what they like to eat and had the correct portion sizes and learned that eventually the hunger pangs go away when your stomach starts shrinking then that would help some lose weight, or even if you limited eating out. We rarely eat out anymore because I just can't stand the taste of the food and would rather buy better quality food with the money and eat it at home.

So often I hear folks say they want to lose weight for a cruise, or for a wedding or for some special event, but I wonder what the long term plan is. I'm not sure how much good it does to diet strenously for a cruise, just to regain some or all of the weight on the cruise.

 

To me the only "diet" that makes sense is a reasonable one you can follow long term and maintain your weight loss even on a cruise or through other big events.

That said, a statistic given in the recent documentary "Fed Up" about how sugar hidden in much of the processed food we eat is a major cause of obesity. It says that 95% of dieters who lose weight regain all of it within five years! That is really discouraging.

 

That just shows that the fight to maintain a healthy weight is a lifelong commitment and probably will not succeed if one just diets from special event to special event. I do understand how a special event can be a big motivation. Heck, I've done it myself and, yes, regained the weight soon afterwards.

Congratulations! You can do this-breathe deep-in and out.one day at a time (one sweater at a time?? )..LOL

PURGE ON, ladies! Love hearing all the progress stories.. :)

Congratulations! I hate to part with shoes, but am getting better, with the encouragement of everyone on this thread!

 

I got 3 sweaters GONE. Step by step, little by little.... :D

Wow! Good for you! I have to say that for me the shoe purge, though the hardest, has been the most rewarding. And I feel "lavish" (haha) looking at my 10 or so clear shoe boxes, and that motivates me to even clean the shoes before I put them back in the boxes so I know the quality shoes are going to last because I'm taking care of them instead of letting them get beat up on the floor of the closet.

You guys motivated me to clean out my closet, starting with shoes. I got rid of around 20 pair. I don't know why I was keeping them, because they are not current and I won't wear them anyway. Talking about crops, I had some 6 year old wide legs----gone! Next, jackets from my teaching days when I was a size 6.

You could go by a church and try that if you want to donate it-usually someone there "knows" of a woman in need, etc.

I'd donate the ones that don't overly "wow" you.

If they are very high quality you could sell them on EBAY- a friend of mine in Europe sole a lot of her finer clothes that way and did quite well.

Or have a swap party-find 5 friends, everyone brings 5 items to swap-specify what, must be on hangers, clean, pressed, etc.. Break out a bottle of wine. I have always wanted to do that and thought that'd be a cheap and fun girls night.

LoisR and Gathina, thanks! Feel free to preach if you want, I probably could use it ;)

 

I like the idea of intentionally keeping some of them, even though I may not wear them. It just might ease the twinges.

 

Oh yes, I am all about "releasing to the universe" or as you put it, sowing and reaping. Will identify 5 tonight to donate. (Unfortunately we have no place around here where I could put together an outfit and offer it ..... it has to be donation to a resale/thrift)

It might be "less traumatic" for her LOL

When she gets the "feel good" feeling from donating it hopefully that'll reinforce her to keep doing it-but I would donate it to where you specifically know who is going to receive it versus Goodwill where someone would buy it (like me!)

Lois is a mind reader-I was thinking the same thing! If Lois doesn't want to be preachy I will-think of it is as "sowing and reaping"-like you sow seed you reap a harvest. So if you "sow" a sweater into a gal's life sooner or later you'll reap a harvest of some sort! :)

 

You could take a sweater, a skirt you don't want, a blouse and assemble an "outfit". Make it nice and on a pretty hanger and present it to what ever organization works with women and tell them specifically you want it to be a gift for a woman going for a job, etc..someone who will really appreciate it. They'll know who!

 

Keep five of them, donate 5, then consign 5. or whatever amount..[/QUOTE]

 

That's a great suggestion. Keep, donate, sell! Sounds good to me.;)

Lois is a mind reader-I was thinking the same thing! If Lois doesn't want to be preachy I will-think of it is as "sowing and reaping"-like you sow seed you reap a harvest. So if you "sow" a sweater into a gal's life sooner or later you'll reap a harvest of some sort! :)

You could take a sweater, a skirt you don't want, a blouse and assemble an "outfit". Make it nice and on a pretty hanger and present it to what ever organization works with women and tell them specifically you want it to be a gift for a woman going for a job, etc..someone who will really appreciate it. They'll know who!

Keep five of them, donate 5, then consign 5. or whatever amount..

Encourgement to keep them? Or to donate? I don't own anything

cashmere.

As for encourgement.....(I don't mean to sound like I am being preachy)

but if you know you haven't worn them in over 2 years? I am betting

there are many gals out there who are way less fortunate and would

be thankful and greatful and to have them.:)

Yep-and the Russell Bromley's I bought that I was too scared to wear have finally broken in just right .Those shoes I'm planning on keeping until I die!

Hi,:) you whittled your shoe collection down to 10 pairs?.....I own 10

pair of sandals:D.......I think I counted 35 total, shoes and sandals.:eek:

I feel your pain-I had lost nearly 60 before I got married and there wasn't enough time to buy a new dress-plus I loved my dress-it cost over $200 to take 6 inches in. So find a good seamstress. One shocker to me was how the quality of new clothes had deteriorated-Kohl's was a real eye opener-I hadn't bought new clothes in like 4 years and sizes, quality, it had all gone down hill so I ended up buying more things at thrift stores that I found to be better made-plus it forced me to really examine the quality, care, etc whereas it would be easier to buy something pretty off the rack and not take the time to really inspect it.

What fun to go shopping! Here was another shocker- I STILL couldn't find any new clothes that were my size even though I was 8-10 range. Everything new was now "bigger" sizes!

Gosh, I've lost 40 lbs now since 12/30/13 (10 more to go) and have been cleaning out closets for a few months now (lucky Goodwill). I'm finally going shopping at the outlet mall on June 21st to buy a new wardrobe, but I'm concerned the new pants won't fit after I lose 10 more. But right now I'm down to 2 pair of pants to wear to work and even those are baggy. I'm getting desperate. And I'm still wearing baggy blouses, just because they're in my closet and I don't mind wearing baggy tops (actually prefer it). Thanks for your inspiration to clean out the closets.

 

SO excited to go shopping!!!