Cruising with my child with autism!!!

I know this has been brought up many times before I wanted to let you all know of my experience of cruising with my daughter, 8 years old and diagnosed with Autistic spectrum disorder.

As a result, I was leaving NOTHING to chance for her first cruise (my second). Initially I had my TA contact Carnival with some results and then I tried myself with some more results. Then came Michael from Autism on the Seas .... perfection!

Before I booked my cruise, he and I had chatted but it simply didn't work with my timing to join one of his group cruises so I went ahead a booked privately. We chatted months later when he offered his services to me to do all of the behind the scenes stuff. I took him up on the offer and I can't say enough about his organization!

We arrived at the port with my daughter wearing her Autism on the Seas shirt and were literally rushed through the terminal as a result of someone seeing it (he even approached us and said are you the 'last name'???). From the time we hopped out of our shuttle to the time of boarding the ship, it was probably 20 minutes. My guess for other pax was easily over an hour. We were personally escorted through security to a VIP lounge and then onboard to be handed over to our personal Carnival contact, Aleks otherwise known Customer Services Supervisor. I can't say enough about this man either.

The cruise itself went great. Our Maitre d' called us daily to make sure we were fine and made special arrangements with room service to bring things up that aren't on the menu. For the nights we made it to the dining room, we had a very secluded table - it was perfect! Wishing a certain chickie liked it better there but I can't complain too much since she did go a few times!!!

The youth director made a private appearance to our room to deliver a few things to my daughter and meet her as well. We never ended up using their services but it looked great and I have no doubt we'll use them next time.

Debarkation was easy too. Aleks escorted us off the ship to avoid lineups once again. Had our ship made it to selected ports (we had propulsion issues), he promised to help us miss those dreaded lineups too.

I can't say enough about Autism on the Seas. Please contact Mike if you are thinking of cruising ... he will simplify all of the planning you need to do!!!

I did a whole review on the Carnival boards if you care for more details

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1127700

but if you have any specific questions, please don't hesitate to ask and I'll do my best to answer. There is a lot of 'autism' specific stuff I left out of the review but if you are interested, I'll fill you in too.

We had a great cruise and will do it again. My daugher has asked about the 'big boat' already.

Miriam

Thank you Miriam for sharing your experience with us.

I have a six year old nephew that is autistic and non-verbal. My sister and I have been discussing taking him on a cruise. :) I guess I will head over to read your full review.

Once again, thanks for sharing. I'm so glad that you and your daughter had a wonderful cruise!

Karen

Hi! We have just booked our first cruise, and our 9 year old is in the midst of a LONG process getting diagnosed with an Autism Spectrum Disorder, most likely we think it's Asperger's Syndrome.

We have not yet told our son about the cruise. He is obsessed with cruise ships and has been looking at the many brochures we have brought home. However he is worried about things, as AS kids do, like he doesn't want to go to a Tropical climate, he is afraid of cockroaches etc.

Since we don't have an official diagnosis yet we aren't sure what options are available to us, and we don't know how he'll react etc. The Mental Health nurse said we'd get an appointment in January for the Dr but so far we haven't had the call yet.

Does your daughter have Aspergers' or do you just know she's 'on the Spectrum'. Because we were told that our son is 'on the Spectrum' but there is quite a bit of further extensive assessments to find out exactly where.

We were hoping that he would be able to be in Camp Carnival with his brother so there would be someone familiar to him, but he will be 9 at the time and his brother will be 7. I wonder if they would allow them to be together.

I wonder if the Autism on the Seas would be helpful to us.

If you have any tips or suggestions please let me know!

Thanks.

We are REALLY worried because the ports of call have excursions that we would love to do, but I'm sure our son will FREAK OUT.

such as:

Horseback Riding

Dolphins

fast boat rides

Is there anything we can do to help him relax and enjoy himself? What did you do with your daughter on the ports of call that she enjoyed?? That the whole family enjoyed??

My friend is in the process of planning a family cruise and they have a young adult non-verbal autistic son. Can you please post a website for Autism at Seas? I hope they can offer assistance for a 19 year old and not just children.

Thanks in advance.

Kerrytens, I am so glad you guys had a great time!!! Would like to see you on one of the group cruises with us. Jamie and Mike from Autism on the Seas just convinced us to book last minute for the Feb group cruise, so we are leaving in 17 days and are so excited. It is great to see all the kids on the spectrum welcomed aboard and even treated as VIPs. :D

qaturah getting the diagnosis can be hard, but just remember it is a huge spectrum and all of our kids are a little (or a lot) different. My son has been diagnosed with PDD, aspergers, high functioning autism and autism so I no longer put any emphasis on the label, its just autism. If you are going on a cruise even before the diagnosis I would contact Autism on the Seas and let them help.

Craving A Cruise, ok, enough discussing, now time to decide which cruise you are going on ;)

My friend is in the process of planning a family cruise and they have a young adult non-verbal autistic son. Can you please post a website for Autism at Seas? I hope they can offer assistance for a 19 year old and not just children.

 

Thanks in advance.

They help with families all over the spectrum regardless of age. Go to AutismOnTheSeas.com

I just sent her an email with the information. Thanks!

We are REALLY worried because the ports of call have excursions that we would love to do, but I'm sure our son will FREAK OUT.

 

such as:

Horseback Riding

Dolphins

fast boat rides

 

 

Is there anything we can do to help him relax and enjoy himself? What did you do with your daughter on the ports of call that she enjoyed?? That the whole family enjoyed??

 

My daughter would have freaked at those excursions too - sensory wise, animals are way over her threshold of tolerance. The lightest touch is simply painful for her (funny thing is that the opposite has a calming effect on her. She asks for 'big squeezes', the tighter the better!) I just reread your excursion list and it said fast boat rides - Hannah LOVED our Everglades' airboat ride. She loves movement so it was totally up her alley.

We didn't make our scheduled ports but did get to Nassau so we booked an excursion to Atlantis. It turned out to be right up her alley with tons of water, and caves to walk through. We almost missed our tour though because she wouldn't get ready so do be careful with timing of them - we actually talked with Aleks prior to booking it in case we couldn't get her off. I didn't want to be stuck with that bill. He assured me he'd credit it back had we not got her off the ship.

As for calming her, we knew when we boarded that our room would be her 'safe' place where she could get away from the crowds and noise. I would definitely plan on having a safe place already set for your son too. We also boarded knowing we'd be following her schedule, not the opposite. She loved certain areas of the ship more than others (Lido deck was a no go for her - but then again, it was too much for me at times too :) ).

The best advice I can give you is to watch your son like a hawk and know his triggers - get him away from anything that would be too stimulating or redirect him before things can escalate and find something he especially likes onboard to use as a reward. For my daugher, it was the glass elevators - she loved them and would always agree to a ride!

To answer your first email, she is medium to high functioning and has the official diagnosis of Autistic Spectrum Disorder. As Sunny said, honestly in the end it doesn't matter for an exact placement on the spectrum, my daughter has autism at the end of the day. My heart goes out to you getting that official diagnosis - just keep at it and don't give up. Pick your battles if needed too.

Someone posted Michael's website, go ahead and contact him. I'm sure he'll be able to offer up advice at the very least.

Enjoy your cruise too!!!

Miriam

Kerrytens, I am so glad you guys had a great time!!! Would like to see you on one of the group cruises with us. Jamie and Mike from Autism on the Seas just convinced us to book last minute for the Feb group cruise, so we are leaving in 17 days and are so excited. It is great to see all the kids on the spectrum welcomed aboard and even treated as VIPs. :D

 

 

Craving A Cruise, ok, enough discussing, now time to decide which cruise you are going on ;)

I'm so envious!! 17 days. You and the kiddo will have a blast. I'll be looking at next year's schedule at this point. Do thank Mike personally for me again when you see him. One day, we'll get to do a cruise together.

My daughter would have freaked at those excursions too - sensory wise, animals are way over her threshold of tolerance. The lightest touch is simply painful for her (funny thing is that the opposite has a calming effect on her. She asks for 'big squeezes', the tighter the better!) I just reread your excursion list and it said fast boat rides - Hannah LOVED our Everglades' airboat ride. She loves movement so it was totally up her alley.

 

We didn't make our scheduled ports but did get to Nassau so we booked an excursion to Atlantis. It turned out to be right up her alley with tons of water, and caves to walk through. We almost missed our tour though because she wouldn't get ready so do be careful with timing of them - we actually talked with Aleks prior to booking it in case we couldn't get her off. I didn't want to be stuck with that bill. He assured me he'd credit it back had we not got her off the ship.

 

As for calming her, we knew when we boarded that our room would be her 'safe' place where she could get away from the crowds and noise. I would definitely plan on having a safe place already set for your son too. We also boarded knowing we'd be following her schedule, not the opposite. She loved certain areas of the ship more than others (Lido deck was a no go for her - but then again, it was too much for me at times too :) ).

 

The best advice I can give you is to watch your son like a hawk and know his triggers - get him away from anything that would be too stimulating or redirect him before things can escalate and find something he especially likes onboard to use as a reward. For my daugher, it was the glass elevators - she loved them and would always agree to a ride!

 

To answer your first email, she is medium to high functioning and has the official diagnosis of Autistic Spectrum Disorder. As Sunny said, honestly in the end it doesn't matter for an exact placement on the spectrum, my daughter has autism at the end of the day. My heart goes out to you getting that official diagnosis - just keep at it and don't give up. Pick your battles if needed too.

 

Someone posted Michael's website, go ahead and contact him. I'm sure he'll be able to offer up advice at the very least.

 

Enjoy your cruise too!!!

Miriam

Thanks Miriam for all the info. Yes animals are way too much for our son. As for fast boat rides I really honestly don't know. We've never done anything like this. I have contacted Mike and we will be phoning each other tomorrow. Some progress has been made, tonight Taran agreed that he WOULD go on a cruise to a tropical climate... "as long as it wasn't near the equator". Before he only wanted to go on a cruise in the 'north' i.e. north of New York. (we live near Halifax, so this was NOT what we had in mind!!!) he previously was worried about going anywhere 'hot'.

I am very interested in what Mike has to say. We have not contacted Carnival about any special needs (yet) probably because we aren't exactly sure what they are yet. I know for sure if there are board games or other kind of games where competition is a factor he won't want anything to do with it. He is often in his own world a lot and the mannerisms he does, or 'tics' could be misunderstood if we don't identify his challenges to staff.

Both the cruise and the 'Able Autistic' diagnosis is very new for us and my husband worries that by going through Autism on the Seas we might get 'labelled' whatever that means, all in all we just want the whole thing to be a positive experience for our son. (and us!)

Is there anything else you can suggest? Its so nice to find someone who has experience with this.

Thanks

We are set up for 'Your Time' Dining on Carnival Liberty, we chose this because we wanted to make sure we were at a table for 4 (us) and also in case he had an episode or if we delayed on shore and couldn't get back on time for 6pm we could still go to dinner whenever we could get there.

Do you think there will be disadvantages to this being on the Autism Spectrum? I know the only thing that appears to be different is you don't have the same waiter, or table. But we wanted to ensure that we got our own table.

I noticed you sailed on Carnival Liberty too so I was wondering what you thought about the Your Time vs. the Set Time dining in view of your daughter. Or if you got any feedback from others if they were on the other plan how it was.

Is it true the 'Your Time' is not in the regular dining rooms? Is it 'less formal' than set dining?

Looking forward to your reply.

Thanks Miriam for all the info. Yes animals are way too much for our son. As for fast boat rides I really honestly don't know. We've never done anything like this. I have contacted Mike and we will be phoning each other tomorrow. Some progress has been made, tonight Taran agreed that he WOULD go on a cruise to a tropical climate... "as long as it wasn't near the equator". Before he only wanted to go on a cruise in the 'north' i.e. north of New York. (we live near Halifax, so this was NOT what we had in mind!!!) he previously was worried about going anywhere 'hot'.

 

I am very interested in what Mike has to say. We have not contacted Carnival about any special needs (yet) probably because we aren't exactly sure what they are yet. I know for sure if there are board games or other kind of games where competition is a factor he won't want anything to do with it. He is often in his own world a lot and the mannerisms he does, or 'tics' could be misunderstood if we don't identify his challenges to staff.

 

Both the cruise and the 'Able Autistic' diagnosis is very new for us and my husband worries that by going through Autism on the Seas we might get 'labelled' whatever that means, all in all we just want the whole thing to be a positive experience for our son. (and us!)

 

Is there anything else you can suggest? Its so nice to find someone who has experience with this.

Thanks

I am so happy to hear that you've touched base with Mike! Definitely let me know how it goes.

That initial diagnosis is very hard to accept/adjust to/believe ... whatever it is but once you get through that process, you will learn so much about yourself and your child. Sometimes I can't believe how much she has taught me! Sounds to me like you are well on the way to moving forward now and making sure his needs are taken care of.

It is so great that you are taking this vacation with him and to me, that is the key to being an awesome parent to a special needs child ... they are included in everything and not sheltered. I would hate to seclude my daughter from all of the joys of life just because she may be perceived by others as 'different'. I could care less actually! I know her and she is an incredibly loving, sweet and exceedingly happy kid. Once people meet her, they understand that too as they will with your son too. Funniest thing is that kids seem to be drawn to her too despite the fact that she ignores them for the most part!

The staff will absolutely dote over him and he will be a prince. You will be given every opportunity to explain his triggers to the staff and fear not, they will not misunderstand him. I wouldn't be too worried about games etc either. I don't believe your son would be forced to do any activity he is uncomfortable with. Our kids sound similar as Hannah's fave place can often be in her own little head. She also has different stims too but she is easily redirected if they become too intense.

I wouldn't worry too much, particularly if Mike can help you. My best advice again is to not overschedule things during your time on the ship because you may not be able to make it. Make a list of things your son may like and if you find something he does like a lot, use it as a reward for doing something else. Most of all relax! (yes, easier said than done - you should have seen me before I left :eek: )

We are set up for 'Your Time' Dining on Carnival Liberty, we chose this because we wanted to make sure we were at a table for 4 (us) and also in case he had an episode or if we delayed on shore and couldn't get back on time for 6pm we could still go to dinner whenever we could get there.

 

Do you think there will be disadvantages to this being on the Autism Spectrum? I know the only thing that appears to be different is you don't have the same waiter, or table. But we wanted to ensure that we got our own table.

 

I noticed you sailed on Carnival Liberty too so I was wondering what you thought about the Your Time vs. the Set Time dining in view of your daughter. Or if you got any feedback from others if they were on the other plan how it was.

 

Is it true the 'Your Time' is not in the regular dining rooms? Is it 'less formal' than set dining?

 

Looking forward to your reply.

I was actually on the Destiny but they did have your time dining as well. I did your time dining last year when we were on the Crown (my daughter wasn't on that cruise) and we had to wait a few nights for a table but that was a different cruiseline too so I won't say it is the same for Carnival, I don't know actually. We chose the 6PM slot this time in order to have that schedule actually and the continuity of a set table/waiter. Honestly, I can't really comment much on how it worked because we only got her there twice :(. We also arranged for a table for 4 in a very secluded area of the dining room. Carnival has lots of singing/dancing etc by the waiters and I wanted her away from that stuff.

I know that your time was going on at the same time as traditional dining so I don't think it was any less formal. Mike can help get you an exception so to speak so that your son will be comfortable although he does say to try at the very least to comply with the policy. Now with that being said, you see all levels of dress so I wouldn't be concerned on that front either.

Hoping I'm helping!!!

The staff will absolutely dote over him and he will be a prince.

Do you think this will cause resentment in my 7 year old son?

I shouldn't worry so much. But,..... I can't help it!!!

Yes! you are helping me greatly!

Do you think this will cause resentment in my 7 year old son?

 

I shouldn't worry so much. But,..... I can't help it!!!

 

Yes! you are helping me greatly!

Oh gosh no! They'll dote over him too :D We moms can't help but worry, can we? Glad I have helped some. There are some really knowledgeable folks here on CC with special needs kids - one lady in particular and I apologize for not remembering her call name. Hoping she sees this thread to offer you some advice too.

Again, relax ... do as I say, not as I did! ;)

.......

Craving A Cruise, ok, enough discussing, now time to decide which cruise you are going on ;)

You are so right! My sister will be finishing up her degree in just a few more months, so I would love to be able to take her and my nephew on their first cruise to celebrate this big accomplishment! It has been a huge struggle for her as a single mother these past couple of years and she absolutely could use a vacation!!....:)

Unfortunately, we live several thousands of miles apart so I am unable to be involved with them on a daily basis. We are trying to decide when will be the best time for him to take a few weeks off from his program.

She really does not want to disrupt his routine, but would love to come here to CA for an extended visit of 2-4 weeks to make it worth the money and distance travelled. This would involve several flights for my nephew that has not flown since he was an infant. (another issue to contend with.) However, I am willing to fly anywhere to meet up with them.

We think that using my place as home base would be better than living out of a hotel....We are just wondering how long of a vacation is too long? If you know what I mean;) ... Any thoughts or suggestions?

Blessings,

Karen

Taking our kids on a vacation is a fine art isn't it? Finding the balance between planning, planning, planning, and then being flexible and happy to make changes at the drop of a hat.

Two stories that come to mind...my son with autism was 4 the 2nd time we visited Grand Turk, and I was all prepared for a beautiful beach day with him. I had packed everything I could think of to make it a great. When we got there, there were two people playing Uno. My son NEEDED a 2. Total meltdown, I need a 2!!!! I lost a 2, I need a 2!!!!!!!! How could I have forgotten to pack Uno cards, what was wrong with me!? LOL So I scooped him up and off we went to the pool for plan B where he quickly forgot about his lost 2.

Next story is more positive. When he was 3 we made a stop in Nassau. The group I was with wanted to do an island tour and I was less than enthusiastic about putting him in a taxi so we stayed on the boat. It was just me and him...we went up to the verandah deck and had one of our first ever real conversations. A very simple thing for most kids that made our year.

With our kids if you pay attention to what makes their cruise it can be magical. I know one kid who was thrilled over the vaccuum cleaners, one who loved the elevators....and mine whose favorite thing on one cruise was the green golf balls LOL

lucigo, it is a fine art that I don't think I will ever master. And I love cruise stories. :D

First for the bad, on our cruise on the Mexican Rivera, Ian hated going to dinner. He would hide under the table, pout and refuse to talk to people. On the dinner of the 3rd night (I was slow) it finally hit me what was wrong, we were not sitting next to a window!! Since we knew the families at the window we talked to them and worked it out. Ian sat in the window until dinner arrived and then came and sat with me. Ian sat with his friends in the window waiting for dinner and had a great time the rest of the cruise. Now we make sure we sit by the window.

Now for the good. My son amazes me on every cruise with what he does and tries. On this same cruise we tried ice skating and he was so scared. He went out there and fell a few times, but with everyone's encouragement he kept trying. Then he found it fun to fall and kept falling on purpose :rolleyes: Then he amazed me, there was another child that was scared to try and was going to give up. My son went over and encouraged him how to skate and offered to be his teacher.

I love those cruise stories and as Luci said, it can really be the simplest things that make your time onboard truly special and memorable for all. Plan, plan, plan but be flexible is excellent advice too!!!

Luckily my daughter also loved our balcony as much as we did. I bought her a captain barbie from the gift shop and the two of them would come out together and sunbathe! :D And for all of you who have any concern at all about kids and balconies, let me assure you that they cannot fall over. My daughter is exactly 4 feet tall and the railing hit her right at her eyes - it was cute watching her stand on her tiptoes to look out!

Once, and only once, she tried to stand on the lounge chair to which my sister must have scared the crap out of her (with the giant 'Hannah' she screamed) because she never tried again.

That would be my next bit of advice, if you can swing a balcony then do it for sure as you may be room bound more than you truly want! Just enjoy the peace of the balcony :D

Miriam

First for the bad, on our cruise on the Mexican Rivera, Ian hated going to dinner. He would hide under the table, pout and refuse to talk to people. On the dinner of the 3rd night (I was slow) it finally hit me what was wrong, we were not sitting next to a window!! Since we knew the families at the window we talked to them and worked it out. Ian sat in the window until dinner arrived and then came and sat with me. Ian sat with his friends in the window waiting for dinner and had a great time the rest of the cruise. Now we make sure we sit by the window.

 

Now for the good. My son amazes me on every cruise with what he does and tries. On this same cruise we tried ice skating and he was so scared. He went out there and fell a few times, but with everyone's encouragement he kept trying. Then he found it fun to fall and kept falling on purpose :rolleyes: Then he amazed me, there was another child that was scared to try and was going to give up. My son went over and encouraged him how to skate and offered to be his teacher.

Your dining room story reminded me of another! ROFL On the Fantasy (before its refurb) the lights in the dining room had yellow covers. We brought his favorite red jello with fruit in prepackaged cups because he is such a limited brand-specific eater. Well...the yellow tinted lights made his jello look orange! Guess who wouldn't eat and we couldn't figure out why! LOL

I love your skating story!!! My son would do the same thing, falling on purpose, that made me laugh!!! But his encouraging another child, that is awesome!!!

Good luck on your cruise! I hope it all goes well.

We're leaving Sunday for 7 nights on the Freedom of the Seas (17 friends/family members to celebrate my parents' 50th annniversary). My son is 15, non verbal, autism, about 6'1". We did a "practice" cruise over labor day weekend on the Monarch and Michael from Autism on the Seas set us up and because of Autism on the Seas we were treated like royalty on that cruise. We're looking forward to next week, but we understand "anything" can happen and will go with the flow. Both cruises are/were in an inside cabin, not a lot of room, but we didn't have to spend a lot of extra time in the cabin--Zachary loved being on deck watching the waves go by.

We set up a reservation this week through Autism on the Seas for our Thanksgiving cruise on Navigator of the Seas. It is 5 nights and we were able to get a cabin with a sofa bed. We'll feel like we are in a luxury suite. :D

I tell everyone at my son's school about Autism on the seas (he attends a charter school for kids with autism) and since we are only 1 hour from Port Canaveral several of the parents I've spoken with were very interested.

I'm so glad to meet other parents of kids on the specturm on cruise critic.

Maureen:)

@lucigo Ian will only eat green jello, at least we could have packed blue, hehe. Whats funny is Ian loves the ice skating on the ship, yet at a real rink he won't even try.

Maureen, sounds like you guys got hooked on cruising. What ship are you sailing out on this week? I know you will have a great time!! We have always done inside cabins as they are so much cheaper (can normally do 2 cruises for the price of one with a balcony)

Also you will LOVE the Navigator, there is so much to do to keep you busy and also places to just relax.

Good luck on your cruise! I hope it all goes well.

 

We're leaving Sunday for 7 nights on the Freedom of the Seas (17 friends/family members to celebrate my parents' 50th annniversary). My son is 15, non verbal, autism, about 6'1". We did a "practice" cruise over labor day weekend on the Monarch and Michael from Autism on the Seas set us up and because of Autism on the Seas we were treated like royalty on that cruise. We're looking forward to next week, but we understand "anything" can happen and will go with the flow. Both cruises are/were in an inside cabin, not a lot of room, but we didn't have to spend a lot of extra time in the cabin--Zachary loved being on deck watching the waves go by.

 

We set up a reservation this week through Autism on the Seas for our Thanksgiving cruise on Navigator of the Seas. It is 5 nights and we were able to get a cabin with a sofa bed. We'll feel like we are in a luxury suite. :D

 

I tell everyone at my son's school about Autism on the seas (he attends a charter school for kids with autism) and since we are only 1 hour from Port Canaveral several of the parents I've spoken with were very interested.

 

I'm so glad to meet other parents of kids on the specturm on cruise critic.

 

Maureen:)

I never, ever expected to meet other parent of s/n kids on this board but I've made some great friends here. It is always great to network and share stories! I think it would be really great to somehow charter a ship and just cruise together ... imagine the support we'd all give each other.

Enjoy your cruises too!

.....

Maureen, sounds like you guys got hooked on cruising. What ship are you sailing out on this week? I know you will have a great time!! We have always done inside cabins as they are so much cheaper (can normally do 2 cruises for the price of one with a balcony)

 

Also you will LOVE the Navigator, there is so much to do to keep you busy and also places to just relax.

Yes, we are definitely hooked on cruising!! We are on the Freedom next week. Packing tonight and tomorrow. :D