A Solo Crossing of the Atlantic

This is a diary accompanying the review of the same title which can be found at -

http://www.cruisecritic.co.uk/memberreviews/memberreview.cfm?EntryID=112618

It may be of some interest to those considering the iconic sea crossing.

Then again, it may not...

The crossing from Southampton to New York is steeped in glamour and tragedy. An opportunity to be a continuing part of this maritime history, courtesy of an unusually good offer from Cunard for single passengers, is too good to pass up…

Tuesday 20 November 2012

…and so it is that I arrive at Southampton Coach Station on a grey, cold, rainy November morning - a day in fact, reminiscent of most of those of Summer. A tall, casually-dressed American is checking to see if he has enough sterling to pay the taxi waiting outside - a wise move as there really wasn’t room for it inside.

I wonder…..

“Are you going to any of the cruise terminals? Sailing on the Queen Mary, perhaps?” I ask.

Oh yes, indeed-y. He and his companion most certainly are. I ask if I can travel with them as I usually carry some local currency.

My fellow travellers are both long-time residents of the same city in Oregon, but only met each other earlier this morning. He’d already booked his passage to New York whilst she was due to fly back home from Heathrow. Acting on impulse she accepted his invitation to share a cabin and sail back instead. There would just be the two of them - plus Mirabelle, the love of his life. My admiration for them is boundless.

Our driver used to be a plumber on the QE2 and was in New York every ten days. When he learns where I’m from he tells me he once picked up an American who asked him to take him to a hotel well-known in my neck of the woods, 250 miles away.

“How much was the fare?” I ask.

“About £450.”

It’s only mid-morning so, after dropping off my suitcase, I head back into town to explore the QE2 Mile, the pedestrian route running through the heart of the city. The weather is variable - light rain, heavy rain, light rain, heavy rain. The sky is like the season’s best-selling book about the weather - 50 shades of grey.

The queue isn’t moving. Ah, there’s been an air-bridge failure. I sit it out and read a complimentary copy of The Oldie until the queue starts moving again. It’s ten to four when I finally board the iconic liner. Queen Mary is a big girl but she looks neat and trim with pleasing curves. The centre of her universe, the Grand Lobby is well-named. It is very grand indeed.

My spacious inside cabin (6027) is rather further forward than I would have liked. At least the muster station is only one deck up - directly above me. It’s the gym which, unusually, is at the front of the ship rather than the back. The safety drill takes place at 4.30. I return to my cabin to find my case has arrived so I unpack whilst listening to the Captain on the tannoy -

“Completed pre-departure checks and we’re ready to go…..sail past Cowes all the way round the top of the Isle of Wight where the pilot will disembark…..party in Pavilion Pool Deck 12…..weather for the first couple of days - a deep westerly depression over Ireland, only matched by the depression over the BBC..…continue southwest round the worst of the seas..…a bit bumpy tomorrow evening…..have a wonderful crossing to New York.”

A card tells me I have a reservation for the 8:30 PM Late Seating (as requested) in the Britannia Restaurant on Table No. 41 - Deck 2 (Lower Level).

The decks are rather sodden but there are lots of people watching the sailaway. The party in the Pavilion Pool is in full swing with dancing (the gentleman hosts are already hard at work), music and champagne.

The buffet in the Kings Court is plentiful and colourful, spread over several food stations. I have Roasted Tomato Soup with an olive-speckled bread roll, Steamed Cod, Chips, Vichy Carrots, Baked Polenta with Cherry Tomato, and a cocktail of Cranberry Juice and Iced Tea. A band of troubadours (who I suspect may really be the theatre troupe from the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art) announce tomorrow afternoon’s performance of The Canterbury Tales through song and dance. Suitably refreshed after my tasty meal I go astern to watch from the Outdoor Promenade as we drift almost imperceptibly down the Solent.

The Queen Mary 2 Navigational Track Chart shows that our route takes us a long way north of where the Titanic went down. That’s something I hadn’t expected.

Jason, my cabin steward from the Philippines, is responsible for 16 cabins. I ask that he not bother turning down the bed in the evening - leaving the chocolates will be fine. A copy of the Daily Programme includes information about the lecturers on board - astronauts, historians and the great-nephew of a great actress. It should be interesting.

The Cruise Director runs confidently through his well-worn routine at the Welcome Aboard show with lines such as:

“I recently took my father on his first-ever cruise - as a present to my mother.”

and

“I come from Peckham, which, for those who don’t know London, is between Stabham and Mugham.”

He tells us there are over 100 people in the on-board entertainment crew, this will be the Queen Mary’s 191st Trans-Atlantic crossing and tomorrow is Samuel Cunard’s birthday. There are over 5000 stairs - enough to climb the equivalent of Table Mountain - and the ship has the largest ballroom afloat. Uniquely, the Queen Mary has kennels….and the Kennel Master is called Rex! I may have to check up on those facts.

It’s time to meet my fellow solo diners, and waiters. The former are from the UK and Sweden, and the latter are from the Phillipines and Poland. Blue jeans may be a no-no but smart black jeans are fine. I’m the youngest on our table of 4 men and 2 women. Ah, the menu. There’s an excellent choice including vegetarian options. I choose:

- Roasted Tomato Soup with Basil Cream

- Mushroom Strudel with Spinach and Feta Cheese, Thai Red Curry Sauce, Basmati Rice

Table talk veers from single supplements on cruises to holiday romance. “Boo!” to the former and a rousing “Huzzah!” for the latter, I say.

After the entrées are cleared away, the menus are handed out again. I’ll have:

- Apple Cranberry Strudel.

I wait for tea to be served to enjoy with my tasty dessert. C is from Woburn and is well aware of the history of afternoon tea - a ritual to which we are all looking forward. Petit-fours? Oh, no thank you. I simply can’t. I’d requested a table for eight but I think the six of us will get on just fine.

The Queens Room (Cunard seems to have a curious aversion to apostrophes) may have been the largest and most beautiful ballroom at sea when the Queen Mary was launched but she has been surpassed now by her younger sisters. I watch a couple of tall and stylish ballroom tango dancers as they glide effortlessly across the floor to “Jealousy” - an appropriate track as that’s what I feel, being a hobbler more than a glider. A waitress asks if I’d like a drink. I decline and she places a serviette crest-down on the table.

Like the ballroom, the library must have been something to behold when she was launched but that mantle has also now passed to her younger sisters.

Cheese and biscuits in the Kings Court concludes an enjoyable first day aboard. I leave the TV tuned in to the Bridge-Cam channel as my window to the world outside. Sailing westwards means that tonight is the first of several where we gain an hour.

Wednesday 21 November 2012

Having the gym directly above means I’m awakened by early morning masochists. I go for a brisk walk on the promenade deck. It’s a rather beautiful morning - breezy, clear and sunny. At the front are the famous “Commodores Cufflinks” which shows that industrial design can also be fine art, whereas the use of apostrophes seems to be a lost art.

I enjoy a little of the immense buffet breakfast in the Kings Court at a table by a picture window looking out onto restless seas and, after taking a few photos of my surroundings, remember to reset the time on my camera.

At 10 o’clock it’s the first Cunard Insights Lecture in the Illuminations theatre (which also serves as the Planetarium) - “The Mighty Atlantic: Oceanography and Ecology” presented by maritime historian Captain Richard Hayman. It’s a well-presented talk, discussing the Gulf Stream, Hurricane Sandy, the Sargasso Sea and the Bermuda Triangle, and Atlantic fauna. He concludes with a question:

“Why did the ship cross the ocean?

To seek out other ships - fellowship, comradeship and companionship.”

It’s a good answer even if it’s wrong.

Returning to Illuminations, where pictures and potted biographies of celebrated passengers line the walls, it smells…..nauseating. We’re sailing through a pronounced swell and I have a slight headache so I guess others are coping less well. “Voyage to the Planets”, a lecture by husband and wife members of the Royal Astronomical Society doesn’t hold my interest for more than a few minutes. I can always catch it later on Channel 42.

About 40 passengers have turned up for the Line Dancing class but cruises only ever teach the same half dozen dances so boredom quickly sets in.

A small crowd has gathered for the ringing of Eight Bells, located above the Grand Lobby, which is sounded at noon in four pairs. The navigational announcement follows (subsequently repeated in French and German) which tells us that we will skirt the southern edge of a 1000-mile wide depression but the seas will get progressively choppier and it will be bumpy tonight.

From the Chefs Galley I choose ingredients to make up a couple of salad sandwiches before going to the cha-cha lesson in the ballroom. It’s a very popular class but too busy for me so I just watch rather intently, trying to work out why I always start one beat early.

The afternoon starts with a visit to the bridge which is open for public viewing from behind a large glass panel. There are two information sheets available - one explaining the various systems on board and the other giving detailed technical information. An exuberant performance of The Canterbury Tales is followed at 3.30 in Illuminations by the last of today’s lectures - “The Rise of the American Skyscraper” presented by art historian Seth Gopin. He begins by announcing that he’ll finish in time for us to enjoy afternoon tea. Now there’s a man who understands life’s priorities. He’s true to his word and his excellent talk is well-received.

I don’t want to lower the tone of the white-glove afternoon tea service in the Queens Room with my collar-less t-shirt so I take mine in the more informal surroundings of the Kings Court. A couple are discussing whether to go and see this afternoon’s movie showing of Total Recall.

“It’s a bloody sci-fi film,” says he dismissively and grumpily.

The remake is sufficiently different for me to watch the first half before CGI (Computer Generated Indifference) sets in.

I know there’s a launderette on each passenger deck, so where’s mine? The answer is - a long, long, long way from my cabin towards the back of the ship. At least I won’t need to bother with the gym to counter the effects of all the fine food.

Pre-cruise preparation for tonight’s Black and White Ball has included spending several hours watching video instructions on YouTube explaining how to put on a bowtie. After half an hour and eighteen attempts I decide it’s close enough - but just to be sure I ask a girl working in one of the shops about my ensemble of black shirt and ivory jacquard tie. She assures me it looks fine…but how can I believe her? The Twelve Points of White Star Service include:

“WE ARE ALWAYS POSITIVE WITH OUR GUESTS AND COLLEAGUES.

We speak positively and never make negative comments.”

There are only four of us at dinner because H has an invitation to dine with the officers and our Swedish friend has disappeared. M finds the menu particularly appetizing so asks for two starters, a salad and an entrée, and ends up with four sets of cutlery. A couple more and there wouldn’t be any room for a plate. My flan (which, curiously, isn’t served in a pastry case) is tasty but tiny. I ask for another one, receive another three, and therefore end up trumping M with one starter and four entrées! Coconut and Passion Fruit Cheesecake is one of several dessert offerings but I know from previous experience it will be disappointing so I just have petit-fours - a très petit jam biscuit and a chocolate square. M is a cheesecake lover and is unsurprisingly disappointed with its mousse-y consistency. We’re all looking forward to docking in Manhattan rather than Brooklyn where the latter’s only connection with glamour and romance is as the world centre of Hassidic fashion.

I join my friends from Oregon at the ball. They’re sitting with another couple from their dining table who are also from the Beaver State. After an elegant waltz demonstration by the ship’s “internationally acclaimed dance couple, Olena and Dan”, the six gentlemen hosts are introduced. One was the Australian junior backstroke champion in 1946, another has danced with the Queen (he used to be a protection officer), a third is ex-Israeli army…

Thursday 22 November 2012

The sea state is described as “very rough” with waves of 12-18 feet, hence the pitching up and down which I can hear every time the bow slams into the ocean. The TV information channel says that the wind speed is Force 8 - Gale, the ship’s speed is 17.4 knots, the distance sailed from Southampton is 716.9 miles and the distance to New York is 2427.4 miles.

The Winter Garden offers a light and healthy breakfast. There are jugs of grapefruit, tomato, prune, carrot and beetroot juice. I like to mix my drinks and therefore make up a cocktail of all five - and decide it’s not an experiment I’ll be repeating on this trip, or indeed any future trip.

The first lecture of the day is, “China Rising” presented by international lawyer and historian, Nicholas Glakas. It proves to be a fascinating talk, concluding with a précis of its leaders past and present. From there I head straight for the theatre presentation at 11.00am, “An Audience with Rolf Harris & Q&A”. He’s actually been working onstage for an hour preparing his canvas with a burnt orange backdrop. The theatre rapidly fills for an entertaining hour and a quarter where he first chats and paints (a shack in the Outback), and is then interviewed by the Cruise Director.

The ballroom dance class features the tango - slow, slow, quick, quick, slow, quick, quick, close. I’m a little late - too late to be comfortable about joining in - so I watch instead. I must try and be earlier next time because dance lessons are such a good opportunity to socialise.

Another such opportunity is to join a table in the Britannia restaurant where my lunch choice is beautifully presented. Next to me is a woman who was at the China lecture. She says that when she was in Shanghai in 1986, Pudong didn’t exist. I was there in 2009 and tell her Pudong looked like Hong Kong on speed.

I feel progressively dizzier during the afternoon. I haven’t taken any aspirin or travel-sickness pills yet - but I probably should have. It’s too brisk to walk outside but afternoon tea in the Queens Room settles me. Finger sandwiches, miniature cakes, scones with jam and cream, tea, the gentle playing of the pianist, and white-gloved waiters and waitresses weaving their way around the tables provides a pleasant distraction.

“Question No. 11 - Baku is the capital of which country?... Azerbaijan.”

The quizmaster is running through the Afternoon Trivia answers in the Red Lion.

“They never pronounce it correctly,” muses a passing waitress to nobody in particular.

I ask her how, and she explains where the stress should be placed.

I have my account amended to remove the gratuitous gratuity because I prefer to tip directly. The sales office corrects my account as this isn’t my first Cunard cruise. One more would entitle me to free internet time - something not to be sneezed at bearing in mind the costs of cyberspace at sea.

The Chart Room is a very popular place to relax. If only the delightful Sunrise String Quartet, playing the first of their three sessions of the evening, would announce each item. Drinks are served with delicate canapés to the strains of Pachelbel’s Canon, Cloclo’s Comme d’Habitude (a.k.a. My Way), and other enjoyable pieces which I don’t recognise.

An aspirin before dinner means my headache is slowly relieved. The restaurant’s location towards the back of the ship also helps. I ask for the haddock as my entrée because I want to see a hands-free demonstration of lemon-squeezing using fork and spoon. H has returned and tells of her enjoyable evening at the officer’s table. Sadly there’s no sign of our Swedish friend. Against my better judgment I ask for Apricot Cheesecake. Oh, dear. Another failure. Conversation continues over tea, coffee and petit-fours but I excuse myself as it’s nearly 10 o’clock and the RADA troupe are presenting a Bedtime Story up in the Winter Garden where nightcaps (sartorial and alcoholic) are encouraged.

My transfer ticket has been delivered to the cabin. It states “You will be transferred to the Marriott Marquis Hotel on 1535 Broadway where a hospitality lounge has been arranged for you before being taken to the airport for your later flight. Hospitality lounge includes luggage storage & onward transfer to Newark Airport.” Excellent - I won’t have to try and find such a facility elsewhere, (e.g. Penn Station or Schwartz Travel Services).

Clocks are set back one hour tonight for a third time. Hopefully at least one of the time changes will be saved for the last night as we’ll all be getting up early for the arrival into New York.

Friday 23 November 2012

Seas - moderate, sleep - improving. A light breakfast will suffice this morning - a mango smoothie from the Chefs Galley plus some fruit salad and yoghurt. Amazing, clever, witty food carvings decorate the various buffet stations and we can learn how it’s done at the Fruit & Vegetable Carving Demo.

I pick up a ticket for one of this afternoon’s Planetarium shows on the way to the day’s first lecture, “New York Skyscrapers as Symbols of the Modern Word”. Seth tells us that the Lever House Building on Park Avenue is the most influential of all buildings - it was the first in the world with an open-air atrium and a wall of glass, representing the new Modernism - a style which rejected heavy masonry. There’s not a spare seat in the house - but too breathless a presentation rather distracts from a fascinating subject.

The following lecture is “Adventures in Aerospace”. A former Topgun pilot and shuttle commander reflects on a life in the air, presented by Captain Robert “Hoot” Gibson, Astronaut and Aerospace Engineer. Another packed house is treated to an utterly enthralling talk, full of fascinating stuff -

“The shuttle gets to space quicker than most people get to their stateroom…

Duck tape and Velcro are crucial for holding stuff in place, e.g. pencils and cameras…

The shuttle takes 90 minutes to circle the earth so there are 16 sunrises and sunsets per day…

No shortage of healthy egos, exemplified by the legendary notice in a secretary’s office -

Q. How many astronauts does it take to change a light bulb?

A. Just one - because the whole world revolves around him…”

The noonday navigational announcement tells us we are right in the middle of the Atlantic, crossing the Mid-Atlantic Ridge - the longest mountain range on Earth - and we are 450 nautical miles north of the Azores.

A brisk walk (it’s another glorious, sunny day in the North Atlantic) and a brisk buffet lunch is followed by the first of this afternoon’s ticket-only Planetarium shows. Lean back in the red seats, look up at the dome and enjoy the 25-minute ride through space.

This afternoon’s lecture is, “The Extraordinary Partnership of Roosevelt and Churchill” which is distractingly peppered with an extraordinary amount of lip-smacking (amplified by the microphone) during readings of extracts of Churchill’s speeches. Even worse, the lecture overruns so I miss the Tea Dance in the ballroom. Saving the world from tyranny is all very well - but not at the cost of afternoon tea. That’s just too high a price to pay.

“You know what my mottos is? If you’ve got it, flaut it,” says Clare Langan, the rather excellent woodwind virtuoso introducing her last musical piece. There’s more enjoyable music to be heard at the Dixieland Concert in the Winter Garden but I can only stay for a few minutes as it clashes with the late restaurant sitting. Another fine dinner, a pub quiz and a party in the ballroom conclude another enjoyable day at sea.

Saturday 24 November 2012

Today is our first 24-hour day. It’s breezy, calm, clear and sunny but there’s nothing to see - no birds, no planes, no fish or ships. It’s too early to be sociable and have breakfast in the restaurant. I prefer a window seat in the Kings Court enjoying a quiet, leisurely start to the day. A particular favourite amongst many fine offerings is a delicious Danish pastry with a half apricot sitting on a bed of sweet cheese - a perfect accompaniment to a morning cup of coffee.

The lecture, “Greta Garbo - The First Modern Woman”, is terrible. A full house is in attendance to listen to a dreadfully dull presentation by another lip-smacker. I leave after a few minutes.

The noonday navigational announcement tells us that in another 8 hours we will reach the Grand Banks of Newfoundland where the Gulf Stream meets the Labrador Current - creating excellent fishing grounds - and the end of the Atlantic Ocean proper. The Flemish Cap - the site of the loss of the Andrea Gale whose story was told in A Perfect Storm - is to the north. Depressions coming up from Bermuda and down from North East Canada will create storm seas tomorrow. There will be 24 hours of 6-metre seas and strong winds as a result. Today’s nautical nugget explains “Swinging the lead”, originally referring to somebody too lazy to give continual, accurate depth soundings.

The Golden Lion is exceptionally busy but fortunately the live football match has just finished so a table becomes available where I can enjoy an excellent pub lunch of fish, chips and mushy peas. I’d prefer my chips to be a little chunkier though, rather than looking as if a job-lot had been brought in from McDonald’s.

An enjoyable RADA performance of Romeo and Juliet is followed by “Atlantic Navigation and The Age of Exploration”, an all-encompassing if ambitious lecture taking in explorers from Eriksson to Cook. Ah, so that’s why Brazilians speak Portuguese and not Spanish… Very interesting.

Mercutio? I thought Tybalt had cut him off in his prime yet here he is enjoying afternoon tea in the Kings Court. I don’t remember Shakespeare including that particular scenario - maybe it was in an earlier draft.

I go up to the kennels at the back of deck 12 and chat with…... JoJo? Rex used to be the kennel master but JoJo’s been doing the job for over two years. I shall have to tell the cruise director to update his material. Do dogs ever get seasick? Apparently not. If it’s really rough they can get a bit distressed but generally they’re fine with the crossing.

At the dinner table, H tells us she couldn’t get into the pub to watch the football and her favourite team, so she played the slot machines instead with her daily allowance of $20 - and won $600! There’s a Vanilla Cheesecake offering for dessert but I can’t face yet another disappointment. There’s also a consensus that the bun-like scones aren’t as they should be. It’s a bit much when a liner flitting between the UK and the US can’t get either of them right.

Sunday 25 November 2012

The Chef’s Workshop in the ballroom is packed. Nicholas Oldroyd, the executive chef, is master of ceremonies.

“15,000 meals a day … 162 chefs… 25 minutes for an ice carving…over 2000 canapés a day…”

We’re invited onto the floor to watch, chat and sample. I join those admiring the pastry chefs at work whilst refraining from comments about a couple of sweet staples which I’ll leave for the questionnaire at the end of the cruise.

An enjoyable lecture about “The Epic Voyage of Magellan” (where we learn who really was the first man to circumnavigate the world, thus meriting the motto, “Primus circumdedisti me”) given by our maritime historian is followed by, “A Doctor in Space” presented by physician and former astronaut (and therefore also world circumnavigator) Dr. Rhea Seddon. She is Hoot’s wife and explains that each mission almost always has an unofficial astronauts’ photo. Her first was having the crew dressed as MASH personnel. None of the men would volunteer to be Klinger so lots had to be drawn. It’s another superb lecture given to another packed house.

The noonday navigational announcement tells us there are 50 knot winds, storm force, coming from a westerly depression, and we steamed 100 miles north of Titanic’s resting place last night. The seas may be rough but it doesn’t feel that way.

I go for another stroll along the promenade deck on my way to the dance lesson. It’s a beautiful, breezy day with many enjoying the sea air. The Rumba, like the cha-cha, is another dance which I enjoy, and another dance where I suffer from premature ambulation. I dance with a tall, pretty, Canadian blonde for whom the slow pace of the lesson tries her patience greatly.

Lunch provides good company but proves to be a slightly eye-watering experience - a fellow diner, travelling with her teenage son, has barely constrained large watermelons spilling out of a skimpy halter-top onto the table.

I hope Alan Schiller doesn’t mind my filling in US Customs and Immigration paperwork whilst he plays Durand’s Waltz No. 1 as part of his Matinee Classical Concert. There’s more music at the second Afternoon Tea Dance of the voyage. A fellow dance student invites me to sit with her, her mother and another friend from the lessons. As none of my partners had to be stretchered off the floor, I reckon I did ok.

After filling in the how-was-your-cruise questionnaire, I give Jason a small thank-you before heading off to dinner for the last of the formal nights. Before dessert the chefs are brought into the dining room, greeted by rapturous applause. As they line the stairs, the cruise director gives us some facts and figures, for example, there will be over 116,000 eggs served during the week - and there’s only one chicken on board. We all choose the Baked Alaska for dessert to round off a particularly enjoyable meal.

I join my Oregonian friends at the Royal Ascot Ball where some women have joined in the spirit of the occasion by bringing splendid hats. I thought of bringing a mount but couldn’t find one to fit in my suitcase - even when filly expanded. We wend our slightly confused way (because none of us has yet discovered an easy route) to the other end of the ship for tonight’s theatre show, “Apasionata”, which includes an excellent Russian dance segment. Another good day ends with good Vibz in G32 at the back of the ballroom before a little midnight snack in the Kings Court.

Clocks are set back again by one hour tonight.

Monday 26 November 2012

The executive chef greets us in the Britannia Restaurant with, “Good morning everybody.”

“Good morning!”

“Have you all had your breakfast?”

“Yes!”

“Well what are you doing here then?”

A Galley Tour leaflet is handed out containing facts such as, “Almost 610 miles of cling film is used onboard each year”. We are led through to encouraging calls of, “There’s plenty of room in the galleys. We need salad washers, we need potato peelers…”

I chat with Caitlin Baba, chef de cuisine in the Todd English restaurant, about his busy working day.

“Madame, were you bidding or waving to a friend?”

“Bidding,” is the reply from the back of the theatre.

“$500. $550, sir? Yes? $550 it is.”

Onwards and upwards the bidding continues, encouraged by the cruise director.

“Any more at $1250? $1250, going once. $1250, going twice…. Sold for $1250!”

The navigation chart is on its way to Charleston, South Carolina and the proceeds are on their way to the Prince’s Trust.

“Captain, I know you’ve been involved with Cunard for many, many years…,” the cruise director begins at the start of “Captain’s Corner”.

“Not so many, many” is the mock-indignant reply.

Captain Chris Wells entertainingly informs us of his life and circuitous route to the position of Master of the Queen Mary before questions are invited from the audience. These include:

Q) Could the Queen Mary take the Blue Riband?

A) No - the maximum speed the ship has managed is 30 knots.

and

Q) If you could have any command in history, which would it be?

A) The Black Pearl - although I don’t understand how it can sail so fast when it’s so full of holes.

“Almost storm force 10 yesterday…

Around 90 miles off the coast of Nova Scotia…

We’re a little behind schedule so Verrazano Narrows Bridge at 5 o’clock and the Statue of Liberty at 5.30…

There’s light and heating at the Manhattan terminal but not all elevators are working…”

The Captain hands over to the Officer of the Watch who continues with more detailed information, and concludes with the origin of the phrase, ‘To freeze the balls off a brass monkey’. Francophones and Germanophones are however, denied this nautical nugget. Perhaps it doesn’t translate.

At today’s Ballroom Dance Class, the quick-step is taught as a fast foxtrot. Is that all it really is? I chat with a pretty, blonde girl from London as we swap with the next group (the lessons are so popular that the floor isn’t big enough to hold everyone at the same time). Her husband won’t dance, but she’ll try and drag him to lessons when she gets back. And what does she think of the cruise? I can see she’s struggling to phrase it delicately. The selection of complimentary magazines at the terminal in Southampton might have given her a clue.

There’s a new work for sale in the art gallery -

ARTIST: ROLF HARRIS CBE

TITLE: WHITEWASHED COTTAGE IN THE BUSH

MEDIUM: ORIGINAL PAINTING 7.5 X 5.5

PRICE: $123,200 / £80,000 (FRAMED)

I manage to catch the second half of the Matinee Classical Concert where Allan Schiller concludes with Jeunesse Dorée by Sidney Smith - a favourite piece although he admits to ignorance regarding the meaning of ‘Dorée’. Afterwards, in the lobby, where others have already improved his French vocabulary, I thank him for his enjoyable performances.

There is genuine warm applause for the harpist as she finishes playing at the last white-glove afternoon tea service in the ballroom.

“Would you like a wonderful cup of tea, sir?” asks one of the waiters.

“I’d love a wonderful cup of tea.”

“Sandwich?”

“I’d like a cucumber sandwich and a tomato sandwich…and a piece of sponge.”

“Scones?”

“I’m so sorry but I can’t.”

The Chart Room is hosting “Meet the Speakers”. This is an excellent idea and not something I can recall from previous cruises. I just have to ask a fellow passenger to take a photo of me and our two out-of-this-world lecturers.

Dinner and conversation, as usual, is excellent, although I can’t face dessert. H tells of a dancer on the QE2 many years ago with whom she’d become friendly after doing readings for him, tearfully opening his heart out to her one afternoon after discovering his male lover having a tryst in one of the lifeboats. We’re all wondering the same thing - how on earth did they manage to climb into the lifeboats? Before leaving I give John Felix and Paulina a small thank-you.

The evening’s entertainment ends for me in the Winter Garden and a RADA presentation of a Ghost Story after which it’s time to finish packing. My On Board Account Statement tells me what I’ve spent on drink, internet time and a souvenir t-shirt of the voyage. A little after midnight a steward comes to take away my suitcase left in the corridor.

Clocks are set back one hour for the fifth and final time tonight.

Tuesday 27 November 2012

The city that never sleeps. No, not New York. The Queen Mary. It seems everybody is up and about. We pass under the Verrazano Narrows Bridge at 6 o’clock - and it wasn’t worth getting up early for. Wait a minute. It’s 5 o’clock. I forgot to set the clock back! Twenty minutes later we pass by the Statue of Liberty which was worth getting up for. The pilot comes alongside to guide us to our berth at Pier 88…next to Concorde and the Space Shuttle! We’re almost alongside the Intrepid Sea, Air & Space Museum which provides an amazing breakfast view from the Kings Court windows.

The queues for US immigration are immense - stretching back from the ballroom, up through the restaurant and back to the lobby on deck 3 where it snakes back on itself. Oops. That’s my name being called. They’re probably waiting for me at the transfer. One of the Cunard girls drags me past the long disembarkation queue as H calls out to me, “You’ve bagged a pretty one there!”

The hospitality wagon is waiting outside the port gates, parked only a few feet away from the ship’s bow where passers-by are taking photos of our beautiful home for the last week. We are driven away through cold, grey, rainy, hurricane-damaged streets to our hotel in Times Square. Should I have stayed in New York at least one night? No, I don’t think so. I’ve been here many times and the weather is lousy anyway.

We should all be back at the hotel at 2 o’clock which only gives us 3 hours in town. We’re tied to the earliest flight out of Newark but, as the weather is terrible I don’t really mind. It’s certainly not a day to walk along Brooklyn Bridge or visit Grant’s Tomb which I’d hoped to do. The Times Square Museum & Visitor Center (7th Ave between 46th and 47th Street) tells me the best way to get to Roosevelt Island is to catch the F train. There’s sleet and snow when I exit the subway station and the United Nations building can barely be seen down the East River from the aerial tram.

The food concourse in the beautiful Grand Central Station is buzzing. I’m tempted by a traditional slice of Americana. How much? $6.50? For a piddly piece? I don’t think so! I don’t care how celebrated Junior’s Cheesecake is.

The weather worsens as we pick up our stored luggage and drive to Newark. Had it been better I might have made my own way to the airport (e.g. from Penn Station) and gained perhaps another couple of hours in town.

My flight takes off at about the same time the Queen Mary is due to slip her Manhattan moorings and sail back. I wish I was still on board…

Thank you for posting this review, I enjoyed reading it very much. Especially the funny bits :)

I read the "shorter" version of your review on CruiseCritic, and I was delighted to see an even more in depth one here. I love your sense of humor. I am also traveling solo on Cunard, in November of this year (my first T/A and the first time on Cunard), so your insights gave me lots to think about. Thanks so much for sharing this with us!

I was reading about your transfer, was it through Cunard and is that the best way to get to an airport to fly out the same day? I don't mind saying I'm a bit intimidated with all the threads I've seen describing the crush of people to get off the ship and through immigration.

Thanks again for your great review.

Jane

I read the "shorter" version of your review on CruiseCritic, and I was delighted to see an even more in depth one here. I love your sense of humor. I am also traveling solo on Cunard, in November of this year (my first T/A and the first time on Cunard), so your insights gave me lots to think about. Thanks so much for sharing this with us!

 

I was reading about your transfer, was it through Cunard and is that the best way to get to an airport to fly out the same day? I don't mind saying I'm a bit intimidated with all the threads I've seen describing the crush of people to get off the ship and through immigration.

 

Thanks again for your great review.

 

Jane

I was on this same trip and can assure you that the queues for immigration were only there because the Cruise Terminal wasn't operating properly due to Sandy and the floods. Normally it is conducted in the terminal itself rather than on board and is much more civilised, or as civilised as going throuhg US Immigration ever can be.

I was on this same trip and can assure you that the queues for immigration were only there because the Cruise Terminal wasn't operating properly due to Sandy and the floods. Normally it is conducted in the terminal itself rather than on board and is much more civilised, or as civilised as going throuhg US Immigration ever can be.

We were in our car 10-15 minutes after walking off the ship. (Which was both good and bad.)

That said, I suspect it is always best to allow an hour or so for Customs.

Oh, and be SURE to make your bags easy to identify.

Thanks for your blog! I've yet to sail and will have to travel solo so I worry about being bored and alone. (That is why I came here before spending my hard earned money and vacation time.)

Having a fixed table with the same group is very important to me so the lines that offer free floating dining times don't appeal to me. I would not be comfortable trying to "find" people to eat with every day. The option of eating alone in the Lido or in my cabin certainly isn't appealing since I eat alone most of the time when I'm home. You had a great group the entire time.

Living in Brooklyn, I can't miss Queen Mary 2 when she docks for the day. I wondered - what is that ship? - where does she go? - how much does it cost to sail on her? After lurking on these boards - and reading your wonderful review - I am determined to sail on her. The whole trip sounded very solo freindly.

Very much enjoyed reading this expertly written review. It reads almost like a good novel....

I too traveled solo on a crossing back in 2008. One thing to be sure to do is join the CC Roll Call and attend the meet and greet. You can get to know fellow cruisers before you even board, and plan dinners and other activities beforehand...

Thanks for your blog! I've yet to sail and will have to travel solo so I worry about being bored and alone. (That is why I came here before spending my hard earned money and vacation time.)

 

Having a fixed table with the same group is very important to me so the lines that offer free floating dining times don't appeal to me. I would not be comfortable trying to "find" people to eat with every day. The option of eating alone in the Lido or in my cabin certainly isn't appealing since I eat alone most of the time when I'm home. You had a great group the entire time.

 

Living in Brooklyn, I can't miss Queen Mary 2 when she docks for the day. I wondered - what is that ship? - where does she go? - how much does it cost to sail on her? After lurking on these boards - and reading your wonderful review - I am determined to sail on her. The whole trip sounded very solo freindly.

Maggie,

I am a female and travel solo all the time on cruises. I always have a ton of things to do on the ship and never feel out of place. Book the cruise ! You will have a wonderful time !

I (62 year old female) traveled solo on the Jan 3-10th 2013 voyage of the QM2 from NYC to Southampton. I had a wonderful time, never felt lonely once. The first night I was prepared to eat alone (we had open seating because of the delay in embarkation due to disinfecting the ship which altered dining times) and 2 other women saw me and invited me to their table. They became friends for the rest of the voyage. My assigned dining table had 10 people, all singles, a range of ages and we had a great time. Many times I ate alone in Kings Court. When you travel alone you get to chose what you do. Sure, there are some disadvantages but I feel that the advantages outweigh those. It was spectacular.

This is a diary accompanying the review of the same title which can be found at -

http://www.cruisecritic.co.uk/memberreviews/memberreview.cfm?EntryID=112618

It may be of some interest to those considering the iconic sea crossing.

Then again, it may not...

Yes, it was of some interest...it was an Excellent review!

Witty, informative, and a joy to read.

So much so that I had to see what other 'gems' you may have written and found your:

"Tale of Two Virgins"

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1669814

My husband was wondering why I was laughing so much at 1:00 a.m.-so I read him just a few of the witty lines in your review, so it was his turn to laugh at 1:00 a.m.

Thanks for posting....a delightful way to end a day.

seasidegal.

What a delightful review--informative and extremely entertaining! Thank you so much for taking the time to write such a witty account of your crossing.

Excellent review (and thanks to seasidegal who reposted your earlier review). By the way. I"m also on the NW coast of England.

Thanks for your blog! I've yet to sail and will have to travel solo so I worry about being bored and alone. (That is why I came here before spending my hard earned money and vacation time.)

 

Having a fixed table with the same group is very important to me so the lines that offer free floating dining times don't appeal to me. I would not be comfortable trying to "find" people to eat with every day. The option of eating alone in the Lido or in my cabin certainly isn't appealing since I eat alone most of the time when I'm home. You had a great group the entire time.

 

Living in Brooklyn, I can't miss Queen Mary 2 when she docks for the day. I wondered - what is that ship? - where does she go? - how much does it cost to sail on her? After lurking on these boards - and reading your wonderful review - I am determined to sail on her. The whole trip sounded very solo freindly.

Maggie QM2 is extremely solo friendly, I was also on that trip and re booked for the back to back.

Great review...loved it, thank you!

Thanks for sharing! I really enjoyed reading. Even more now I can't wait to sail the QM2 someday (soon, I hope!)