Need to vent

Hey Everyone,

I need to vent and know you guys will understand (don't really want to keep venting to FH and best friend). I have had multiple guests ask me "well, what if we don't make it to the port by 10:30?" (Our time we have to be there for preboard.) I don't know, and really don't want to find out/research because it shouldn't be an option. If I told everyone the wedding was AT 10:30 then they would be there or miss the wedding, so I don't see why this should even be considered!! I have stressed to everyone I have talked to about the wedding (and the moms so they can too) that we ALL HAVE to be there by 10:30 for preboard TOGETHER. Everyone who is going has plenty of time to arrange travel, we sent out invitation 8 months in advance (as soon as we got engaged since we had already discussed having a cruise wedding) with a follow-up letter including information regarding hotel, info we needed, emphasizing we all had to be there at 10:30, etc at 4-5 months. Having heard this question yet again today, I've reached the point that whoever isn't there at 10:30 will have to deal with whatever needs to be done at the port by themselves and if that means they regular board and only make it to the reception, oh well. I know that sounds a bit harsh, but this is also after having to track down quite a few RSVPs (including from the people asking this question!) and information for preboard. Thank goodness I set the RSVP date for a month before the paperwork was due since it took me 2 weeks to get info, faxed the stuff in, and STILL had a change before paperwork was "officially" due (which, ironically enough, is today).

Thanks for listening/reading! I actually am really excited about the wedding, only 45 days away! :)

Girl, don't let those ppl stress you out! What nerve to ask 'what happens if we are late.'

When they ask you what happens, respond "You will miss the wedding, so don't be late!"

I hear ya! If I waited for everyone that told me they were coming to book, I would still not have everything together (1 month away). I think your attitude about it is perfect! You have done your part and now it is their turn to do their part. How hard is it to be somewhere by 10:30!?

We are getting married on Day 2 of the cruise on a beach in Key West. We have family members who "dont like to cruise" so made arrangements to come to the ceremony in Key West. Now they are bummed they can't come to the reception or anything...ummm who told you to go to Key West?! gahh lol So yes I understand completely!!!

**Deep Breaths, and everything will work out***:rolleyes:

I hear ya! If I waited for everyone that told me they were coming to book, I would still not have everything together (1 month away). I think your attitude about it is perfect! You have done your part and now it is their turn to do their part. How hard is it to be somewhere by 10:30!?

 

We are getting married on Day 2 of the cruise on a beach in Key West. We have family members who "dont like to cruise" so made arrangements to come to the ceremony in Key West. Now they are bummed they can't come to the reception or anything...ummm who told you to go to Key West?! gahh lol So yes I understand completely!!!

 

**Deep Breaths, and everything will work out***:rolleyes:

That is the key thing right there.

I don't think that's harsh at all. You give them a time, if they're not there by that time then they're on their own. It's your wedding day. You don't have time to deal with people who can't follow the simple instruction of "be there by 10:30." My (ex-military) grandfather always used to say "if you're early, you're on time. If you're on time, you're late. If you're late, you're f****d."

Good on you for actually tracking down the people who couldn't be bothered to RSVP. It killed me to do it but I didn't even bother trying. More than 2/3 of my guest list didn't send it back and without a home phone and a cell that stinks, I would have been standing out in the cold for hours spending a small fortune calling them all. If they didn't send back a pre-addressed, pre-stamped post card and didn't mention to us that they're coming, I assume they're not going to be there.

My cousin is planning a wedding for September and no one in her immediate family of 7 could be bothered to send back their RSVP for my wedding. I don't know yet if I will find it important enough to send back hers. (I talk a big game but I'm not sure if I can resist my charm school programming to be that rude.) I'm in disbelief that she requested my address via email yesterday when she had on 4 separate pieces of mail I've sent her in the last year including an STD, a newsletter, an invite and a Christmas card... Some people :rolleyes:

We are getting married on Day 2 of the cruise on a beach in Key West. We have family members who "dont like to cruise" so made arrangements to come to the ceremony in Key West. Now they are bummed they can't come to the reception or anything...ummm who told you to go to Key West?! gahh lol So yes I understand completely!!!

How many of those that "don't like to cruise" have ever been on a cruise? We actually had not one, but two of the people who "don't like to cruise" suggest that we change our plans to accommodate them. Unbelievable.

Here is my solution. Go to Vegas, get married and forget inviting anyone. That's what I did. But I was never one of those that wanted a wedding anyway so that was an easy solution for me.

Thank you ladies!! I feel better and appreciate that I'm not the only one who would be upset by this. :) Julie, I tried telling myself that if I didn't get an RSVP back that I would take that as they weren't coming, but when the time came I couldn't bring myself to follow thru with that :rolleyes: Good luck with planning and I look forward to reading how your weddings go!

Thank you ladies!! I feel better and appreciate that I'm not the only one who would be upset by this. :) Julie, I tried telling myself that if I didn't get an RSVP back that I would take that as they weren't coming, but when the time came I couldn't bring myself to follow thru with that :rolleyes: Good luck with planning and I look forward to reading how your weddings go!

You're certainly not the only one. My situation is a bit different as the wedding is at sea so they absolutely have to cruise in order to attend. People are not going to book a trip without telling us, if someone did, we'll deal with it when we get there though I don't think those chances are good.

Anyone who you mean something to will make sure to be there on time, anyone else isn't worth the effort of even thinking about. I would suggest to anyone that you subtract 30 minutes to the time your guests must be there. So you tell them to be there at 10 if they need to be there by 10:30. It at least gives you a buffer of 30 minutes. My in-laws were extra careful and actually got there at an early hour early with about 30 other guests they rented a bus with.

It'll all work out in the end, try not to get too worried about it. I know my whole experience gives me a new found respect for weddings and now I think I will always RSVP immediately!

I'm telling everyone to be there at 10 to avoid any issues. For anyone who asks, I tell them Port Canaveral has some fantastic restaurants so it they are late, go eat at one so it's not a wasted trip.;)

Thank you ladies!! I feel better and appreciate that I'm not the only one who would be upset by this. :) Julie, I tried telling myself that if I didn't get an RSVP back that I would take that as they weren't coming, but when the time came I couldn't bring myself to follow thru with that :rolleyes: Good luck with planning and I look forward to reading how your weddings go!

I feel the same as you! I sent S-T-D & RSVPs out a full year in advance to give people time to plan. And of course most of my people have just booked, 6 months later lol. I've got 5 months left and will send the invites with all the little details including some other form of RSVP for the final guest list. I feel it is sad that it has to be this way but like someone else said, the ones who really care will make sure they are at your wedding.

Good luck and congrats!

I am glad that I am not the only who has to deal with slackers!!

we are 4 1/2 months away...and believe it or not, we send out MONTHLY emails to people - reminding them of the plans, what they need to send us for their info, etc....and yet, we are still getting dumb questions that were answered 10 emails ago!!

So Frustrating. ...and to make matters worse - we decided to Charter a BUS...so that our non sailing and some of our sailing guests would have transportation to the port - which has been clearly stated in the save the dates, the wedding website, and the multiple emails....and still...people are asking "how can i get there??"...

you can walk for as much as i care at this point. i keep telling my fiance that if people dont show up with the correct documentation like they were told that its their loss....but, he has a different opinion on that...so, now...he thinks that the morning of the wedding, he needs to be the one standing at the front of the bus with a damn clipboard making sure that the guests have what they need......

UNBELIEVABLE!! can you sense my frustration??

i keep saying "screw it" and lets go to vegas...but he wont listen...:D

"Anyone who you mean something to will make sure to be there on time, anyone else isn't worth the effort of even thinking about. I would suggest to anyone that you subtract 30 minutes to the time your guests must be there. So you tell them to be there at 10 if they need to be there by 10:30. It at least gives you a buffer of 30 minutes. My in-laws were extra careful and actually got there at an early hour early with about 30 other guests they rented a bus with.

It'll all work out in the end, try not to get too worried about it. I know my whole experience gives me a new found respect for weddings and now I think I will always RSVP immediately! "

I am thankful that the handful of people that are my "HAVE TO BE THERE" people are taken care of and definetly wouldn't be late. I wish I would have thought to subtract 30 mins and told everyone 10 instead of 10:30 but the invitations were done quickly since I only had a two week break from school right after we got engaged to get as much wedding stuff done as possible. Oh well. Thanks again, everyone, I do feel better and am not going to worry about anyone making it to the ship except me, parents, groom, sisters, and best friend....but since they will all be with me, I'm not concerned about them! :)