Crasiest or Dumbest things you have heard people complain about

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Not voo-doo...but what do YOU do?
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Indianapolis, IN
83 Posts
Joined Mar 2006
I was just thinking of some of the weirdest, dumbest, or most funny complaints I have heard while on a cruise ship. It was on Princess in the Caribbean there was this one lady. We were standing in line at the pursers desk and the lady in front of us finally had her turn. She walks up carrying two full pieces of paper that were loaded with complaints. One was they requested a table by the window and didn't get, amongst others I can't remember. The one that stuck with us was that she was complaining that she was having to wait 2 minutes for her toast in the morning at the buffet. The kitchen had placed a staff member at the toaster to help people, and most likely because someone burned them selves using it so someone else toasts your bread. She kept going on and the point we couldn't hold it in and busted out laughing at her. Really complain about toast????? We were barely half way through our cruise and this lady had already accumulated enough complaints to fill up 2 pieces of paper. I guess paradise doesn't make everyone happy.
Orlando, Fla
271 Posts
Joined Jan 2008
We were on an Alaskan cruise and were on about day 3 or so when we heard a gentleman loudly exclaim (in the buffet area), "I want off this ship, I've had enough of this "ALASKA" stuff....isn't Alaska the reason you TAKE an Alaska cruise/trip???? We just shook our heads, there was really nothing else we could do.....
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Ridgefield Park, Teaneck, Maywood NJ
687 Posts
Joined Mar 2008
We were on a Caribean cruise and some old lady blurts out "OY this heat..I cant take it, Its got to be 100 degrees how are we soppose to enjoy ourselves with this weather?"..lmao she should of booked an Alaskan cruise!
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Indianapolis, IN
83 Posts
Joined Mar 2006
I forgot about this one. We were in Antigua on a private tour. When we first showed up and met our driver he was very nice and kind. We had group of people for MI, couple from CA, and a couple from TX. When the group from MI showed up all they did is complain. They said they asked for a private tour and didn't want to be with other people, and also said the owner promised them he would be the driver and not his brother. His brother, who was very funny and polite, explained that the owners son was sick and he to take care of him and sent his appologies and then explained this is a private tour. My wife tried to explain to them that in the Carib, this is what they define as a private tour (private=small). My wife lived in the Carib for a few years...this still did not make them happy. A few of the ladies lets say were quite large and had a hard time sitting in the seats...which sorry I kind of chuckled when one got stuck. Anyways the guide took us all over the island to see the sites.....and these hens could not shut up and kept complaining. I apologised to the driver for all Americans and told him I appreciated him taking care of us. He just replied can't make everyone happy all of the time. I laughed and replied back yes I guess your right as he poured me more rum punch.....I drank a lot just so I could stand the others. The coupld from TX and CA were cool and so the six of us just sat back and made fun of the others. Time comes around and the driver passes a menu around so he could call our orders in to our final destination...lunch on the beach!!!! All of the people order hamburgers and complain about how expensive it is. Ummmm folks...sorry look around do you see any cattle ranches around? NO! If you see a cow it is likely for its milk or for a families beef supply. They have to import the beef! Eat local food if you want to save money. Then one asks is this place air conditioned? Um your on the beach and there is a good breeze...why do you need AC? So we get there and I get my goat curry which I love. One lady could barely let me enjoy it she just commented on how gross that was and how could I eat that and I can't believe you are eating it. Folks the world is not America....don't try to make it that way.
33 Posts
Joined Jan 2010
I was in the Gulf of Mexico (forget which cruise line) and on the second day this lady wanted to write something. Picks up a pen off of a table and tries to write on a napkin. It didn't work and she goes, "Of course the GD pen doesn't work, nothing on this F boat works!" This was at about noon of the second day, made me kind of curious what could have gone so wrong in less than 24 hours, but I was too scared to ask her...
Cedar Rapids, Iowa
431 Posts
Joined Sep 2009
A couple weeks ago I was at the International Cafe on the Emerald Princess getting my coffee. A lady comes down to get her coffee to go for her and her husband. The barista asked "Do you want the small or large?" Convo went something like this
Lady: What do you mean small or large? There is only one size
Barista: We have small or large cups for coffee, Which one would you like?
Lady: No I've been cruising for 10 years on Princess and there has only been one size!
Barista: We have a 8oz and a 16oz(showing the lady the size)
Lady: Well this is new, I guess that one(points to it)
Lady looks to me and says "They have never had two sizes before!!" in a rude/complaining tone
Me: Well at least they don't have tall, grande, and venti (starbucks sizes)
Which is when I get a mean/confused stare from lady and she walks away in a huff with her two coffees.
I guess some people really can't take change!
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Emerald Princess Jan 2010- St. Maarten, St. Thomas, Grand Turk (Princess Cays cancelled due to wind).

Carnival Triumph Dec 2009- Ocho Rios-Jamaica, Grand Cayman, Cozumel
21 Posts
Joined Mar 2008
There was one guy (he had to be from Texas, judging by his accent) who one morning decided to crap to the waiter that the bacon wasn't crispy enough for him. He complained and complained and complained, making everyone around him impatient and angry, as they were waiting for their food. The cook made the effort to go back and refry him some crisper bacon, and then once he got that he still wouldn't shut up! Some people...

Then a similar situation happened later when the fries weren't crispy enough. I'm not sure if it was the same guy, but the situation played out the exact same.
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Redmond, WA
877 Posts
Joined Jun 2008
DH and I were waiting in line at YVR for the buses to the ship. This "lady" in line behind us NEVER stopped complaining!! About everything! she was from texas and nothing was as good as texas, the airport was crowded, too many asian people (Yes, really!), bus fumes, etc. Then when we finally got on the bus,guess what? she sat right behind us for the very looong bus ride to the pier. And again, she never shut up! The traffic in Vancouver was terrible, streets are all broken up, too much construction, they will NEVER be ready for the Olympics (our cruise was in Sept, 2008), on and on it went. When we finally got off the bus my dh says "if she is at our table we are moving!" thank goodness Miss Texas was not!!! And I didn't even know she was with a husband until we got off the bus and she started barking orders to him, he never said a word!! could NOT get one in LOL!

How bad can it be, you are going on a cruise!!!

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Past cruises
Celebrity Eclipse/Caribbean/April 2013
Celebrity Infinity/Panama Canal/ September 2012
Celebrity Summit/Canada/New England/ September 2011
Celebrity Infinity/Alaska/June2010
Celebrity Infinity/Panama Canal/September 2009
Celebrity Millennium/Alaska/September 2008
Sun Princess/Alaska September 2006
Indianapolis, IN
83 Posts
Joined Mar 2006
These are great I love them!!!! Keep them coming folks!!!

The bacon one I love....I like crispy bacon too, but hey with a buffet I do not count on it and just take it for what it is worth...and do not complain

And the last one about being on a cruise how can you not be happy...I wife and I feel the same....your on vacation relax.......

keep them coming everyone!!!!
St. Marys, GA
3,279 Posts
Joined Feb 2007
We were in St. Thomas on the Glory when we were informed that we would have to miss St. Maarten because a hurricane was hitting there. We could not believe how many people complained and moaned and groaned about having to miss this port even under these circumstances, especially after our alternate port....Grand Turk had sunny skies high 80 temps, only cruiseship in port, Margaritaville, what more could you ask for!?! Some people!?!
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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. . . It's learning how to dance in the rain! We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust our sails.

Austin, TX
162 Posts
Joined Nov 2005
My husband and I were on a 16 day NCL repositioning cruise in 2006. What could be better? We had beautiful weather except for one sea day near the end of the cruise. It rained for about 4 or 5 hours.

In the buffet there was a group of very vocal Californians, so loud that they were talking over us two tables away. We know where they were from because that's how they introduced themselves to their tablemates. "Hi! We're from California... Can you believe this ship? Ugh!" They complained about the food ("Terrible! Just terrible! It has no flavor!" If it has no flavor, how can it be so bad? lol), the rain ("You'd think the captain would've known about this! He drove us into the rain!"), the national holiday that had a lot of things closed in Barbados ("You'd think they'd open [shops] up for the cruise ships!" Because the tourists are most important than your national holidays...).

It seemed nothing was good enough for them. They said they'd be glad to get home. I couldn't wait for them to get home, either.

To all the petty complainers out there: If your home is perfect, stay there! I'd hate to see you disappointed.
Cincinnati Ohio
1,101 Posts
Joined Aug 2006
Get a load of this guy. He got sick and it's the cruise line's fault!
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Your old pal,

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Gainesville, FL
137 Posts
Joined Jan 2010
Originally posted by Ben222
There was one guy (he had to be from Texas, judging by his accent) who one morning decided to crap to the waiter that the bacon wasn't crispy enough for him. He complained and complained and complained, making everyone around him impatient and angry, as they were waiting for their food. The cook made the effort to go back and refry him some crisper bacon, and then once he got that he still wouldn't shut up! Some people...

Then a similar situation happened later when the fries weren't crispy enough. I'm not sure if it was the same guy, but the situation played out the exact same.
There's no such thing as bad bacon.
9 Posts
Joined Jan 2010
I was glad to see this thread because on the previous two cruises I was surprised by # of complaints and the rudeness I witnessed.

But after reading these over and over, I started to realize it is sad...because you just know that each one of these people must have something really, really terrible going on in their lives.

Thats the only thing I can think of that makes sense.
Vancouver BC
7,241 Posts
Joined Feb 2008
First day on a cruise out of New Orleans, 4 of the 6 of us are sitting at the dinner table, and the last two arrive. An English lady from Carlisle complains about the two remaining seats at the table "Oh I don't want to sit there and look out the window, because I don't like being on boats" (If you've seen the movie Chicken Run, it didn't help that she sounded like Mrs Tweedy)

OMG, she just flew how far to be on a boat and the first words out of her mouth were "I don't like being on boats!!!". Her poor husband seemed nice enough, but completely hen-pecked.

Of course throughout the cruise there were complaints about the food every night, including sending back some Prime Rib because there was just a hint of pink in the middle "It's not cooked!", and one that sticks in my mind "I don't like garlic in my mashed potato". She would come to dinner and order a burger <sigh>.

This meant war, and I went out of my way to order things I knew would offend her, such as rare steaks, and Escargot. "Wow aren't these snails EXCELLENT!"
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30 miles west of Chicago
869 Posts
Joined Feb 2007
Originally posted by scottbee
This meant war, and I went out of my way to order things I knew would offend her, such as rare steaks, and Escargot. "Wow aren't these snails EXCELLENT!"
You sound like my kind of tablemate!
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Nancy & Steve

Enchantment of the Seas...04/28/2007
25th anniversary cruise.
Ocho Rios & Grand Cayman

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Progresso & Cozumel

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Grand Turk, San Juan, PR, St. Maarten & St. Thomas

Southport, UK
319 Posts
Joined Feb 2009
Originally posted by Prphan2
You sound like my kind of tablemate!
Mine too! That's exactly what I'd have done if she was on my table. Silly woman! I hate people like her - always moaning and picking fault. I don't know why she bothered to leave home if she knew it was all going to be such a disappointment.
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Always looking for the next cruise!

P&O Ventura - June 2015 - Portugal, The Canaries & Spain.
Grand Princess - June 2012 - Mediterranean
Grand Princess - June 2010 - Mediterranean
Bavarian Forest, Germany near the Czech border
2,022 Posts
Joined Nov 2009
We were in Dubrovnik on our last cruise where they have public toilets at the entrance to the old town. Now remember the Kuna is the official currency and Euros are often accepted too. This group of American ladies turn up and start bitching at the restroom attendant that he does not accept large US$ bills (I think it was 50$). Finally the man gives in and agrees to take 1$ bills, but tells them honestly that it is a lot of trouble and his bank charges a lot of costs to change it and therefore he cannot give them change back. Of course they start whining that he is ripping them off. While standing in line, the ladies complain in a loud voice what a backward country this is (try paying in Kuna in the US?) and that they live in the Middle Ages here and what a load of crap this town is. And the shops are closed on a Sunday too (as if that is the attendants fault?). Then they complain that there is no toilet paper. Just a word of advice: in southern Europe there is no toilet paper in the booth, but there is a roll outside where you come in where you have to take what you need inside. Sometimes the attendant gives you the paper after you pay.
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Ottawa Canada
4,275 Posts
Joined Jan 2006
We were on our second cruise and on a sea day we had a q&a with the Captain in one of the lounges. He was asked the same question. This was his answer; A couple "requested an audience" with the Captain to complain that it, get this, "rained" in the rain forest, omg I don't remember what he said to them. Rain in the rain forest???
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