Tablemates

[cruisetobeaches]

When we cruise alone, we request a table for two which has never been a problem. When we cruise with family and/or friends, we take what is assigned. Once was a real riot! Other times, not so much.

 

On one particular cruise last January, we got our table for two right next to where we were originally assigned. after seeing who and what was seated there, we were GLAD that we had moved!

 

When we go to breakfast in the MDR, we take where ever we are seated. Most times, it is OK. But, once we were seated with a couple that was very hard of hearing and did not have hearing aids, so conversation was awkward and quite loud!

[frogquackers]

Reading all of this reminds me of the cruise my DH and I took on our tenth wedding anniversary. We left the kids at home and were seated with three other couples, ALL NEWLYWEDS... I am sure somewhere we are the old couple that ruined their honeymoon. :o

[hug71]

I guess I have been very lucky the last 2 cruises that I have been at great tables. Both years there have been 6 of us at the table, last year all singles and this year 4 of us single and 1 couple. I had the most fun this year with my table mates and hope to see them all on a cruise again

[Casino Player]

Our 4th cruise is in March -- family of 5, and we hope to get our own table in the MDR, as we did last family cruise, and as we did on our first cruise when we were with 2 other couples.

 

Our most recent cruise, just DW and me, we were at a round table with 2 other couples a decade or two older than we are (early 50s); a grandfather with his 20-something-year-old granddaughter (I felt sort of sorry for her ...) and two very sweet but VERY quiet older ladies.

 

It was not unpleasant -- but my wife is VERY outgoing, so let me just say we did not particularly look forward to dinners because it was so ... boring.

 

About the fifth nite, I persuaded a number of folks (including one of the quiet older ladies!) to down a shotglass or two of the after-dinner drink special ... that livened things up a bit!

 

Anyone else have this situation -- and what did you do?

 

HHHHHEEEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOO Cambarensis: Ask for your own table. You should be able to get one.

[Cambrensis]

HHHHHEEEEELLLLLLLLLLOOOOO Cambarensis: Ask for your own table. You should be able to get one.

Thanks Casino Player!! Now if you have any casino advice ... (I played the slots once or twice, probably not $5 my whole life ... and I complain about boring tablemates!?!);)

[frayedend]

One thing for sure is sometimes you just have to be the outgoing person. We were once at a table with a bunch of people that wouldn't talk. It seemed they just weren't social and we were looking at eachother like "Oh No!" Well finally I made a comment like, "Well get me some more rum cause I gotta drink myself a personality and maybe some of these fine folks will too!" Well everyone laughed and then a few ordered drinks and we ended up having a great time.

[MsTabbyKats]

Note to people:

 

When there is a loud person at a table or even worse, several loud mouths....it inhibits quiet people from joining in the conversation.

 

The tablemates you don't enjoy, because you feel they have nothing to say...probably have lots to say but don't say anything because they know no one could hear them over the loudmouths. Your loudness, if anything, inhibits them even more.

 

And they are probably more than happy to see the loud ones move, because most of what loud people talk about is usually idle chit chat and nonsense anyway.

 

Did you ever think maybe that's why they don't say anything to you?

;)

[frayedend]

Note to people:

 

When there is a loud person at a table or even worse, several loud mouths....it inhibits quiet people from joining in the conversation.

 

The tablemates you don't enjoy, because you feel they have nothing to say...probably have lots to say but don't say anything because they know no one could hear them over the loudmouths. Your loudness, if anything, inhibits them even more.

 

And they are probably more than happy to see the loud ones move, because most of what loud people talk about is usually idle chit chat and nonsense anyway.

 

Did you ever think maybe that's why they don't say anything to you?

;)

 

 

Yeah! I'm sure those quiet folks have so much more important stuff to talk about than the idle chit chat that us loud mouths talk about.

[Cambrensis]

Yeah! I'm sure those quiet folks have so much more important stuff to talk about than the idle chit chat that us loud mouths talk about.

Frayed, you can sit with me anytime! But, I'm not so sure about all the important stuff quiet folks have to say ... we'll simply never know cuz they are so ... quiet.;)

[conchead]

Note to people:

 

When there is a loud person at a table or even worse, several loud mouths....it inhibits quiet people from joining in the conversation.

 

The tablemates you don't enjoy, because you feel they have nothing to say...probably have lots to say but don't say anything because they know no one could hear them over the loudmouths. Your loudness, if anything, inhibits them even more.

 

And they are probably more than happy to see the loud ones move, because most of what loud people talk about is usually idle chit chat and nonsense anyway.

 

Did you ever think maybe that's why they don't say anything to you?

;)

 

I have always noticed the opposite.

 

The "loudmouths" you mention are usually happy leading the

"conversation" because they enjoy hearing themselves and

think everyone else does too.

 

The quiet ones are usually the ones to move on.

[MsTabbyKats]

I have always noticed the opposite.

 

The "loudmouths" you mention are usually happy leading the

"conversation" because they enjoy hearing themselves and

think everyone else does too.

 

The quiet ones are usually the ones to move on.

 

Yeah...the quiet ones move on or just grin and bear it by "tuning them out". I was really commenting on how "the quiet ones" are not so happy with their tablemates either.

 

Another problem with loudmouths....

They don't listen.

Otherwise they would take constructive criticism without getting defensive. :)

[frayedend]

Yeah...the quiet ones move on or just grin and bear it by "tuning them out". I was really commenting on how "the quiet ones" are not so happy with their tablemates either.

 

Another problem with loudmouths....

They don't listen.

Otherwise they would take constructive criticism without getting defensive. :)

 

DId you say something? I couldn't hear you because I was talking about myself so loudly! :)

[Crusin6]

We had a nice, but totally incompatible couple seated with us on our honeymoon cruise. There was no conversation between any of us as DH and I felt uncomfortable not bringing them in our conversation...so even he and I keep it quiet.

 

One night, the other DH was a bit ill and jumped up and ran out. The DW told us the next day that he had, shall we say, " to be near a bathroom"

 

Now, to have someone run away from you at the table is sort of funny..of course you all know it didn't bother us at all....even if it was the sight of us that made him sick!!!:D:D:D:D

 

Somehow, I just think he was plain ill.

[doe326]

Note to people:

 

When there is a loud person at a table or even worse, several loud mouths....it inhibits quiet people from joining in the conversation.

 

The tablemates you don't enjoy, because you feel they have nothing to say...probably have lots to say but don't say anything because they know no one could hear them over the loudmouths. Your loudness, if anything, inhibits them even more.

 

And they are probably more than happy to see the loud ones move, because most of what loud people talk about is usually idle chit chat and nonsense anyway.

 

Did you ever think maybe that's why they don't say anything to you?

;)

 

No, DH and I never thought about that at all because we are not loud people. Also, there were no loudmouths around our table when we were seated with the "stone people". Both DH and I tried many different ways to get them to talk but all they did was stare straigh ahead and act like we weren't even tere. Don't think it was us because in all our past cruises we had a great time with our tablemates. in fact most times I'm the one that hesitates to talk until I get to know people. I think there are just some plain rude people on cruises, whether they be loud or quiet. If someone asks is this your first cruise, or where are you from the least they can do is answer. These people wouldn't even do that, except when my husband got one of the men to answer. Then we get stuck with one of the couples at breakfast. We thought that maybe they were intimidated by the other two non-talktative couples, but no they were also uncommunicative. So glad we were able to move. I would have had to switch to the buffet before putting up with this every night. Our new table gave us a direct line of sight to the old one and we never once saw any of them talking to one another. So it's a good thing the 6 of them found each other. We have been really lucky on our other cruises and had some really nice tablemates. Some we even still correspond with. Besides I wasn't about to let them ruin my cruise.

[conchead]

We sat near people, not exactly at the same table.

There was a long bench seating area, with multiple tables

along it with chairs on the other side. So there were gaps between the tables.

There was no talking between our table and the one beside us.

(we were on the end). It never occured to me that we should talk to them,

and they never talked to us.

 

I am really glad we weren't at a real "table" with them.

It was a woman and her young 20-something daughter.

They were the very formal prim and proper type.

(I have no reason to assume they were in anything other than nice people )

 

We are not the formal type.

Manerly..yes, neatly dressed..yes, but we are a lot more casual and relaxed.

Lets put it this way, if they ate a cheeseburger, it would be with a knife and fork.

We just didn't feel comfortable that close to them and would have prefered a different table.

But we only ate in the MDR twice.

No point to be made here, just a view from my side of the table.

[MsTabbyKats]

[quote name='conchead'][SIZE=3][COLOR=black]We sat near people, not exactly at the same table. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]There was a long bench seating area, with multiple tables [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]along it with chairs on the other side. So there were gaps between the tables. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]There was no talking between our table and the one beside us.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black](we were on the end). It never occured to me that we should talk to them, [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]and they never talked to us. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]I am really glad we weren't at a real "table" with them. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[COLOR=black][SIZE=3]It was a woman and her young 20-something daughter.[/SIZE][/COLOR]
[COLOR=black][SIZE=3]They were the very formal prim and proper type.[/SIZE] [/COLOR]
[COLOR=black][SIZE=1](I have no reason to assume they were in anything other than nice people )[/SIZE][/COLOR]

[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]We are not the formal type. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]Manerly..yes, neatly dressed..yes, but we are [/COLOR][COLOR=black]a lot more casual and relaxed. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]Lets put it this way, [I]if[/I] they ate a cheeseburger, it would be with a knife and fork. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]We just didn't feel comfortable that close to them and would have prefered a different table.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]But we only ate in the MDR twice.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]No point to be made here, just a view from my side of the table.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/quote]

When you're in a restaurant, would you talk to the people at the next table, or booth etc?

So, why should a cruise be different.

There are so many other places "to meet" people...where you may have something in common.

For the record...my husband and I usually eat at the buffet. It's not because we are anti-social...but just prefer the buffets.

We tried sharing a table on our last cruise...open seating. The man never shut up about his grandkids etc. The wife couldn't get a word in. And we didn't care. We left the table knowing his entire life story, and he didn't know a thing about us. :)

Doe326...is it possible that the people that these people has some real behavioral issues...such as "severe social anxiety disorder" and were traveling as a group? So many together is just too coincidental. The behavior wouldn't be out of rudeness..but rather inability to communicate with strangers.

Things like this is why these treads about "not being happy" with tablemates bother me. No one tries to look at it from "the tablemates" point of view.

[stephic411]

I am glad you brought this up because I was just thinking about this today! It is my boyfriend and I on the cruise and I was wondering if we would be placed with other tablemates?..I won't mind really but we are in our 20's and also very outgoing..as in we will probably be doing manyyy after dinner shots:rolleyes: ha. I guess it is always different how they place you? I am not to sure.

[conchead]

[quote name='MsTabbyKats'][COLOR=blue][COLOR=black]When you're in a restaurant, would you talk to the people at the next table, or booth etc[/COLOR]?[/COLOR]

So, why should a cruise be different.

There are so many other places "to meet" people...where you may have something in common.

[COLOR=red]For the record...my husband and I usually eat at the buffet. It's not because we are anti-social...but just prefer the buffets.[/COLOR]

We tried sharing a table on our last cruise...open seating. The man never shut up about his grandkids etc. The wife couldn't get a word in. And we didn't care. We left the table knowing his entire life story, and he didn't know a thing about us. :)

Doe326...is it possible that the people that these people has some real behavioral issues...such as "severe social anxiety disorder" and were traveling as a group? So many together is just too coincidental. The behavior wouldn't be out of rudeness..but rather inability to communicate with strangers.

Things like this is why these treads about "not being happy" with tablemates bother me. No one tries to look at it from "the tablemates" point of view.[/quote]

[COLOR=black]I understand that, but this is a lot closer than a normal restaurant[/COLOR]
[COLOR=black]I could probably have reached without leaning and touched shoulder.[/COLOR]
[COLOR=black]A couple more inches would have made it seem more like a separate table[/COLOR]:confused:

[COLOR=red]That sounds like us[/COLOR]:)

[jayesouthworth]

[quote name='conchead'][SIZE=3][COLOR=black]We sat near people, not exactly at the same table. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]There was a long bench seating area, with multiple tables [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]along it with chairs on the other side. So there were gaps between the tables. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]There was no talking between our table and the one beside us.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black](we were on the end). It never occured to me that we should talk to them, [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]and they never talked to us. [/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]I am really glad we weren't at a real "table" with them. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[COLOR=black][SIZE=3]It was a woman and her young 20-something daughter.[/SIZE][/COLOR]
[COLOR=black][SIZE=3]They were the very formal prim and proper type.[/SIZE] [/COLOR]
[COLOR=black][SIZE=1](I have no reason to assume they were in anything other than nice people )[/SIZE][/COLOR]

[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]We are not the formal type. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]Manerly..yes, neatly dressed..yes, but we are [/COLOR][COLOR=black]a lot more casual and relaxed. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]Lets put it this way, [I]if[/I] they ate a cheeseburger, it would be with a knife and fork. [/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]We just didn't feel comfortable that close to them and would have prefered a different table.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]But we only ate in the MDR twice.[/COLOR][/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][COLOR=black]No point to be made here, just a view from my side of the table.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/quote]


My only requirements are: They speak English, they eat with a fork and a knife, don't open their mouth with food inside of it, and they like guns and ammo. I guess DH and I need to be seated with some rednecks. :D

[frayedend]

[quote name='jayesouthworth']My only requirements are: They speak English, they eat with a fork and a knife, don't open their mouth with food inside of it, and they like guns and ammo. I guess DH and I need to be seated with some rednecks. :D[/QUOTE]

Hey I am a Yankee (not a New York Yankee, hate them) but a Boston Yankee and even though my state is super liberal anti gun hell I would sit at your table and we could talk guns all night. My wife of course would probably give me some bad looks but hey what the hell. Too bad they don't do skeet shooting on the ships anymore. Actually I don't know if they ever really did that but I remember seeing it when the "Love Boat" was on tv.

[buckirj1]

That's why I like flexible dining so much. If your tablemates are duds, you only have to put up with 'em for one night! And if you hit it off with your 'mates, you can make arrangements to sup together another night. I like meeting all kinds of people on a cruise, even if they aren't the sort of folks I'd hang out with back home. My only rule is opposable thumbs and a pulse. Oh, and no children.

[conchead]

[quote name='jayesouthworth']My only requirements are: They speak English, they eat with a fork and a knife, don't open their mouth with food inside of it, and they like guns and ammo. I guess DH and I need to be seated with some rednecks. :D[/quote]

[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green]This would have been worlds apart and so much better.:D[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green]By the time I was about 7, my father had already taught me[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green]how to break down and reassemble a 45.;)[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[frayedend]

[quote name='conchead'][FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green]This would have been worlds apart and so much better.:D[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green]By the time I was about 7, my father had already taught me[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green]how to break down and reassemble a 45.;)[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/QUOTE]



Maybe we need a Cruise Critic Gun Owners Cruise. :)

[jayesouthworth]

Our last cruise after we asked to be moved, we sat with a couple from Alaska. He was a fisherman and owned guns, his wife was a teacher. The other couple, owned a sporting goods store somewhere back east. We hit it off just fine. The conversation ended in politics, but we were all on the same page which made it nice. :D

[conchead]

[quote name='jayesouthworth']Our last cruise after we asked to be moved, we sat with a couple from Alaska. He was a fisherman and owned guns, his wife was a teacher. The other couple, owned a sporting goods store somewhere back east. We hit it off just fine. The conversation ended in politics, but [COLOR=red][B]we were all on the same page which made it nice[/B][/COLOR]. :D[/quote]

[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green]I won't ask if it was the page on the[I] left[/I], or the page on the[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][I][FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=4][COLOR=green] right[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT];)[/I]

[FONT=Comic Sans MS][SIZE=3][COLOR=green]Well.. on the ship I guess it would be port or starboard[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] :D