Traveling WITHOUT children - mommy panic and withdrawl

[energizer7]

You are so right. The very best thing that we can give our children is a loving, stable marriage. Also, when our children are grown and leading lives of their own, we do not want to be strangers. We have 8 children and the older two (adults) will be caring for the rest while we are gone. They are most capable and trustworthy and I won't think twice about them while we are gone. We have rendevous points set up with them ahead of time for webcams and skype. Its lots of fun for all.

totally agree :0) Nice to see someone else with the same number in their brood :0) The children will have a blast with their Aunt because they can do things out of the normal routine which is always fun....we also have fun surprises for them throughout the time we are away. And they learn that when mom and dad go away, they come back, so there is nothing to worry about...

[tmealer]

My sons are grown now. We decided to renew our vows in May instead of December (our actual anniversary) because we had a feeling our middle son wouldn't be here. We were right. He is graduating college, then he has in Internship with Walt Disney down in Orlando. He will be leaving the week that we are on our cruise. The oldest is a trucker, the youngest lives on campus. It will still be hard to leave them, but after 25 years, we have decided that we deserve this.. Bahamas here we come!

[Athankfulheart]

totally agree :0) Nice to see someone else with the same number in their brood :0) The children will have a blast with their Aunt because they can do things out of the normal routine which is always fun....we also have fun surprises for them throughout the time we are away. And they learn that when mom and dad go away, they come back, so there is nothing to worry about...

 

 

We leave a bag for each day. My 2nd oldest daughter helped me shop for and prepare the bags this year. Each bag contains things like DVDs', games, crafts, activities and treats. My kids look forward to these whenever we take a mom and dad trip ( typically once a year). We love our children and spend more time together than a typical family because we home school as well as do so many "outside" activities together. Perhaps it would be more difficult to vacation without them if we hardly ever saw them ( think school, work, activities that take families in different directions). Even so, I think we would still need to nurture our relationship with one another.

[lhhjrs76]

I'm leaving my 8yr old son with my parents while I'm gone. Originally, I DID feel guilty - but, quickly remembered our last trip to Disney World (12/2011) and didn't feel as bad. This is the 1st trip I have taken ALONE (aside from business travels) and I feel that I fully deserve the time away from my reality for a few days. I'm a single mom, work full time, and carry all the weight on my shoulders with no help from my son's "father"....I NO LONGER FEEL GUILTY!! And, I know my son is safe while I'm away :)

[SunSeeker27]

I would for sure get the notarized letter for them. It'll be handy incase they need to use it other time they are watching them to and it will only take 10 minutes of your time.

 

I broke my wrist while my parents were gone once and had to wait 10+ hours for a dr to even look at it while they tried to get ahold of my parents for permission to treat. I was 9 and I remember it very clearly to this day... While I'm sure that won't happen to you it's like insurance, you never hope you'll need it but you're glad you have it when you do.

 

Also, it depends on where you are going for cell phones and who your carrier is. For some you can call them and ad international for the bit you are gone then take it off when you get back.

[Nebr.cruiser]

We are going without the kids also. Ok, the kids are in high school, but we still worry

 

Don't forget insurance cards for them!

 

I think I'd worry more with high school age kids!

 

Although our 'kids' are around 40 now, when they were young we did occasionally travel without them. I never felt guilty, as they were with loving Grandparents and having a great time, but a couple of times, the last day or so, I did start to get a little 'antsy' and ready to get home.

 

I personally feel that it is good for parents to have alone time and for kids to to develop some independence and enjoy some special time with grandparents or other relatives. (We also took many family vacations.)

 

We sometimes keep the grandchildren now while their parents vacation and we look forward to these special times with the grandkids. We also took the seven (!) grandkids on a cruise last year by ourselves and had a blast. I thought one of the moms might have a nervous breakdown while we were gone, but all went fabulously!

[Realblonde474]

I'm leaving my 8yr old son with my parents while I'm gone. Originally, I DID feel guilty - but, quickly remembered our last trip to Disney World (12/2011) and didn't feel as bad. This is the 1st trip I have taken ALONE (aside from business travels) and I feel that I fully deserve the time away from my reality for a few days. I'm a single mom, work full time, and carry all the weight on my shoulders with no help from my son's "father"....I NO LONGER FEEL GUILTY!! And, I know my son is safe while I'm away :)

 

Amen girl! I am a single mother of three teenagers and take trips at least once a year without my children. It makes them more responsible and I believe they appreciate me more when I return.

 

Enjoy your trip!

Donna

[paramedicduo]

We took our first kid free vacation last summer without our 4 boys. I cried for the hour drive back to our house after dropping them off with my parents...half way home, dh finally turned to me and said, "should we just cancel?" It was rough...but, we flew out the next morning and by day 2 (embarking day), I was feeling less anxious and guilty. I spend almost every waking hour with my children (I work overnights so I don't miss time with the youngest during the day and I'm home to get them to and from school, homework, etc, every day) and I think it made me a better mom to relax with my husband for a glorious week! We spoiled each other for 9 days, doted on nothing more than each other, came and went as we pleased, ate when we wanted & what we wanted, stayed up way too late & slept late some days...etc. It was the best and worst thing we ever did for ourselves!! The best because we were able to completely reconnect with each other and disconnect from our hectic schedules (hockey, soccer, PTA, cadets, work, owning a business, etc) and worst thing ever because now we've been bitten by the bug (look out Oasis...July 2012 by ourselves again)!

A fellow CC'er recommended that I take a photo of the kids together & put it on our night stand.

We didn't call home...as much as we wanted to, I knew it was best if we didn't. Leaving needed to be like ripping off a bandaid. We emailed every single day with updates and XO's.

Left our complete itinerary, contact numbers, daily schedules, health cards, favorite stuffed animals/lovies.

Being Canadian, we don't need to worry about our children not receiving medical care without a POA.

 

Have a few drinks...toast your children & your commitment to each other! And, enjoy every last minute of your cruise, you will have the next 360 days to make it up to your children ;)

[Lady Chew]

OK. Here's a confession: I would leave my DS, 5, in a heartbeat to go on a cruise ALONE with my DH! I am a stay-at-home-mom, and I could really use a little adult time. Unfortunately, we don't have family with whom we could leave our son, so we took him with us on our cruise last year. It was a great family vacation. BUT, I would give anything to have a grown-up vacation with hubby. I don't think I'm a bad mom; indeed, I am completely devoted to my only child. If you're leaving your kids with the g-rents, and you trust them completely, go ahead an get a signed document allowing them to make medical decisions, but PLEASE, don't let your worries ruin a great vacation. Once you get onto the ship, order a drink, put your arms around hubby, and ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would if I could :)

 

It still think this is bizarre.

 

There are no likely circumstances where we would go off on holiday and leave our kids behind. If we couldn't afford a particular holiday with the kids then we'd choose a cheaper one.

 

I guess we knew the "job" was full time and decades long when we signed up too.

 

I love my children, have always loved my children, and will always love them ... but I have never had a problem separating from them, and they have never had a problem separating from us. Our first child was born with a substantial handicap, and our pediatricians & specialists all emphasized how important it was for us to be able to take a break and get away from the day-to-day responsiblities of our child(ren).

We took short trips at first, then moved on to longer trips. We were also able to take a long (10-12 day) family vacation almost every year. Some of our trips were very low-end on the budget scale, but they were still fun!

We always left the appropriate documentation & information for their caregivers (sometimes family, sometimes professional sitters) ... and we always keep our wills current. As our first lawyer said, "may you sign them, and not need them for another 90 years"

We now have two independent sons, 29 & 25, who value their independence but still love to spend time with us ... and even though my daughter is completely dependent on others for her care, she has no problems when we are not around. And that is very important!

So whatever you do ... don't feel guilty!! Enjoy the "alone" time you have with your spouse, and enjoy your family time!! No reason you can't have both!

[chelspie]

We just got back from our first ever cruise (all of us) and have planned a cruise just the two of us in May. I had to use my cell phone in Cozumel, and I had no trouble with access w/voice, internet, or texting (but I'm dreading my bill having not planned to use it). I did not try to use it on the boat. We were on Carnival, and they have minutes you can purchase for wi-fi, and I think I'm going to purchase an hour and use it to send emails and pix. If the cell bill isn't horrible, I may call from a port, but I think once we get going, I'll be so busy, and they will be in school. I hope you have a great time!

[paramedicduo]

Incase you haven't thought of it (im used to unlimited internet), A word of advice, if using wifi that you've purchased, type up all emails when you're offline & just log on long enough to hit send...you'll save yourself some minutes.

[Happy ks]

We had no surviving grandparents to watch our kids for a week, so we did envy those who did! Our kids were 10 and 13 before we took a vacation away from them and had to depend on th kindness of 2 different aunts and one uncle for the 8 days we were gone.

 

Anyway, we struggled to find a pay phone to call them when in port, the ones in the terminals had long lines with lots of crew wanting to call home. (can you tell this was years ago, before our cell was attached to our body 24/7?) when we finally called, they were too busy to talk to us (auntie has a pool).

 

Leave a permission letter, leave your worries at home, you can pick them up again when you return. I agree with what others have stated, your kids will stress out if they hear your voices. Enjoy your vacation!