Kids on Cruises

I don't have kids, and I know I'm probably walking right into fire with this sort of subject but I feel like saying my two cents. So please be nice to me, I'm just stating my opinion.

Well behaved children should be allowed nearly everywhere. Poorly behaved children most likely originate from parents who are the cause of the behaviour, OR are exhausted themselves from the kid's antics and trying to salvage a life without constantly battling with a difficult child.

Babies cry and even if it's durring dinner, it's really not such a big deal. Parents can't control children. There is no off switch. When I see a parent walking with a crying child and not leaving the restraunt etc... I try to see it as hope. They are genuinely maintaining hope that this crying will end soon. I can guarantee it wears on the parents more than on those eating nearby. They have to go home with all that noise!

I believe there are times when children should be left at home. Depending on age, temperment and options the parents have (not everyone has a good support system to ask to babysit).

Kids are little gemstones and as they learn, it is like the gemstone is being polished. Children are always learning, and as adults it is our job to help them learn, not beat them into submission. I don't agree at all that children should be seen and not heard. Granted they don't always make likeable noises, but we made the same noises as children.

So to any parents out there, know there are some people who welcome seeing children and aren't so bothered when they act like children. Many people say that people always think their own kids are good, but I think most kids really are good. They all just need to act up now and then, it's all part of learning.

There is even a new scientific study out about teenagers acting batty (not their wording). They now believe it's not just hormones, that there are neurological bits and pieces rearranging themselves. Almost like their kid brains are being rewired into adult brains. They are opperating in a construction zone with crazy-hormones to top it off. It's a wonder we survived it at all!

Best wishes all!

My hat's off to you for being patient and understanding. :)

I, for one, enjoyed your post. As a parent of a almost 4 year old that will soon take his 7th cruise I am almost afraid to reply, almost, but whatever people want to say, let them say it.

DH and I cruise 3-4 times a year, all but once a year is with our son (we take a weekend cruise without him)

If he acts up at dinner, and he has when he was younger, one of us would leave the dinning room with him until he was calmed down or for the rest of the dinner, which ever happened first. On our last cruise in April with him, I chose to let him go to Johnny Rockets with the kids group instead of doing the formal nights in the dining room. We all enjoyed that better!

What I don't get is people IN THE POOL not on the sides, not on the steps, but IN THE POOL asking him (me) to have him stop splashing. IMO, if they don't want splashing either get out of the pool or go to the solarium pool where children are not allowed.

We don't bring our son to late night shows, to the bars, casino or art auction, those aren't places for him at this time. I believe that kids and adults CAN cruise together.

When we are on our cruise alone, I don't get angry at children crying, I just thank GOD they aren't mine <g>

Thanks for your post!

I agree. It's a lot easier to tolerate/overlook a young child acting like a spoiled brat, than an adult acting the same way. I have seen far too many adults acting like brats on cruises. That said, this applies to kids who are being supervised. Unsupervised children or teens can creat havoc in a hurry. There is no 'polishing' without someone there to polish the gem. Kids should cruise, parents should be parents, and adults should be adults.

I have to agree on most of this. I still want adults only venues on a ship. I want a break too. However when my child is melting down, and they all do, believe me it is not bothering anyone as much as it is bothering me! If only duct taping their mouths were legal ;)

There are well behaved children, and poorly behaved children. There are well behaved adults, and poorly behaved adults.

Behavior routinely tolerated when by adults is often derided in children. When I see an adult or group of adults bothering others by being loud or otherwise rude, I think to myself that if those we adolesents behaving that way rather than adults, they would be thrown out!

I took my daughter and her friend to a "family type" restraunt last weekend. On one side we had a group of loud men who were openly rude to their waitress. On the other side we had a group of adult women giggling like school girls, one of whom stole the table's entire supply of artifical sweeteners when she left. The girls and I were polite, spoke in our "inside" voices, and took only the complementary breath mint!

It is not a kid issue, it is an issue of common courtesy!

Our kids began cruising with us at ages 5 & 8. Before that my DH and I took a cruise w/o them and I heard there were 200 kids on board, but I never saw any of them. Our first cruise with the kids had 600 on board, and I only saw a handful at the kids program.

Now that they cruise with us regularily, I notice more children, but rarely see as much as the people on these boards see. However, we are all in bed before midnight, and much action must take place after that--adults and children included.

No child is an angel all the time, and either is an adult. Like the poster before, its common courtesy that they (we) all need to remember.

I only have my children for a few short 18 years, so travelling with them is mandatory (whether they like it or not:-). They already will leave the nest far too soon!!

I have to jump in here... I know I should just bite my tongue and move on (or keep my fingers off the keyboard)... but after seeing thread upon thread about children on ships, I just have to speak up.

First, I'm going to say that I have never cruised before. DH & I are taking our first cruise on the Caribbean Princess in October. Secondly, I was a single parent of 3 kids for many years. Time & money were very tight, in addition my oldest was ADHD with a learning disability. But I could take my kids with me anywhere they were legally allowed.

Now... I've qualifed my opinion... and that's just what it is.... my opinion.

There are many appropriate times and places for children to accompany thier parents. Cruises can be one of those. HOWEVER, it is always the responsibility of the parent to ensure that their child is schooled in the proper etiquette for whatever situation they are taken into.

Infants fall into a different category than other ages. Infants have absolutely no way of announcing discomfort (either hunger, wet diaper, pin poke, etc). Crying is an infants only form of communication. When an infant cries it shows it needs attention of some sort. Walking around a crowded restaraunt or dining room with a visibly distressed infant is not addressing that infants needs. I'm sorry if this upsets some people, but if your child is crying, is not hungry, is not wet, appears to be in no physical discomfort... maybe it's over stimulated by the noise/activity level of the venue you are in. And no amount of walking, humming, jiggling is going to help that.

A toddler can be taught (conditioned, trained... choose your descriptor) how to behave appropriately in a public restaraunt. At no time is it appropriate for a toddler to be allowed to leave the table and wander around (unsupervised, I might add). It is never appropriate for a child to throw food, or try to engage near by diners in conversation. And a toddlers attention span is short. If you think you're going to be at a 2 1/2 hour meal, ensure there is a small, quiet toy to entertain the child. This way you can finish your meal in peace.... as can the other diners. If the child gets restless, maybe one parent can take a 5 minute walk with the child, something to break up the monotony of just sitting there.

When you get into the pre-teens, teens/young adult phase they should already know the drill. Anyone in this category that does not know how to conduct themselves in public properly needs to be left home (in the cabin, etc)

It's been said and preached for years that kids thrive on limits. I have to semi-disagree with that. They may not thrive on them, but limits allow them the freedom to behave in certain manners WITHIN those guidelines. Is it okay to laugh and joke with your table mates? Sure, if you're not guffawing and disturbing the other diners.

I'd also like to agree with several posters that there are adults out there who haven't a clue how to behave in public. Either that or they just don't care. Folks like this can spoil things for others without even caring or knowing. I wish I had the answer to solve this one..... but, alas, I don't.

Thanks missbear, what a lovely post! It is nice to hear something other than a complaint about kids. I work hard to ensure that my children are well behaved everywhere they go, and have always been considerate of others. It's nice to know that it's appreciated.:D

Thanks missbear, what a lovely post! It is nice to hear something other than a complaint about kids. I work hard to ensure that my children are well behaved everywhere they go, and have always been co

nsiderate of others. It's nice to know that it's appreciated.:D

i agree totaly. well said.:)

I can not even imagine cruising without my children. What a wonderful way for them to experience different cultures, meet new people, and for us - it is one of many ways that we spend extra quality time together. I feel very fortunate overall, considering I have 3 girls ages 13, 12, and 11. They are for the most part very well behaved - with that occasional - oops, I should have kept my mouth shut comment. When we cruise, prior to leaving we cover our rules and we verify them again when we arrive - including the part in the documents regarding being removed from the ship due to specific types of behavior. I do not fear my children making this kind of mistake, but I am not leaving issues to chance - they must know in advance the punishment for making bad decisions.

I want to caution everyone regarding taking teens and pre-teens on a cruise, that you should not treat their new found friends any differently than you would those at home. If my daughters want to spend time with these new friends, I still want to meet their parents, I want to know their names and I want to know what cabin they are staying in. I have expectations for my children's behavior, but that does not mean that other parents have the same expectations. I also know, that a single meeting does not mean that everything will or should be ok, but if necessary - it does give me a good place to start.

I feel very fortunate that through the years of cruising with my girls, their behavior has always been complimented. I can't wait to cruise with them again this winter, each year they amaze me even more. Is it weird, if all of your official family pictures are cruise photos? My kids laugh about the fact that they own more formals than any teenager should. Anyway, happy family cruising to everyone!

It's so refreshing to hear someone without children say something nice. I'll bet children love you! You are very kind! :)

Now that my DD is a teen I have learned that attentive caring parents have well- adjusted well behaved kids.

The parents you know you could speak candidly to about issues or problems...don't really have kids that have those kinds of issues or problems. The kids that cause the most problems..have parents that you can't expect cooperation from. It's that simple.

It's the same on the playground, on the school bus and on a cruise ship.

You don't get pears from an apple tree.

Quote : mbtaz

What I don't get is people IN THE POOL not on the sides, not on the steps, but IN THE POOL asking him (me) to have him stop splashing. IMO, if they don't want splashing either get out of the pool or go to the solarium pool where children are not allowed.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

What I don't get is why people with their precious little 'do no harm' can splash adults in the pool when so many pax must concider each other when they are in a confined venue with many others. It is just plain concideration to have your child not splash people. If you don't like being told to have him stop splashing >>>> Get out of the pool or Go to your stateroom and let him splash it up in the bathtub.

Fire extinguisher in hand :D

Quote : mbtaz

What I don't get is people IN THE POOL not on the sides, not on the steps, but IN THE POOL asking him (me) to have him stop splashing. IMO, if they don't want splashing either get out of the pool or go to the solarium pool where children are not allowed.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

What I don't get is why people with their precious little 'do no harm' can splash adults in the pool when so many pax must concider each other when they are in a confined venue with many others. It is just plain concideration to have your child not splash people. If you don't like being told to have him stop splashing >>>> Get out of the pool or Go to your stateroom and let him splash it up in the bathtub.

 

Fire extinguisher in hand :D

Oh, I never said my son can "do no harm" believe me. We are very considerate. You don't need a fire extinguisher but let me know if you are ever on one of the cruises I'm booked on, I'll be sure to splash you myself ;-) Oh wait, you'll be in your room in the bathtub.

There is even a new scientific study out about teenagers acting batty (not their wording). They now believe it's not just hormones, that there are neurological bits and pieces rearranging themselves. Almost like their kid brains are being rewired into adult brains. They are opperating in a construction zone with crazy-hormones to top it off. It's a wonder we survived it at all!

Now that explains everything:p . As a mother of two teenagers I can relate to the "acting batty":D

I just wonder how I will survive it all:rolleyes:

Oh, I never said my son can "do no harm" believe me. We are very considerate. You don't need a fire extinguisher but let me know if you are ever on one of the cruises I'm booked on, I'll be sure to splash you myself ;-) Oh wait, you'll be in your room in the bathtub.

LMBO ...good one ;)

ps . I don't fit in the bathtub :o

It was pleasant reading all the nice posts. Thanks all!

Best wishes.

"It is never appropriate for a child to throw food, or try to engage near by diners in conversation."

Wow, I have to think about that one. I have a 14 month old little girl, she has been walking since 9 months so I'm pretty sure she qualifies as a toddler. She knows about 5 words 2 of which are hi and bye. She will repeatedly say hi over and over until she is responded to, and I can't imagine somebody saying that this is "never appropriate". Are there really people so snooty out there that they won't smile and say hello to a little baby and tell her how cute she is? That is the joy of babies and small children, their pure innocence. I agree with almost everything that has been said, but not that comment. I love saying hello to small children and maybe even playing a quick game of peek a boo with them from across the aisle. I way prefer that to squirming, screaming, and tantrum throwing.

I leave on my first cruise in three weeks, and I won't be taking my kids, but even though I'm on a kid break if somebodys 2 year old wants to talk to me for a quick minute during dinner, they will have my full attention.

There is even a new scientific study out about teenagers acting batty (not their wording). They now believe it's not just hormones, that there are neurological bits and pieces rearranging themselves. Almost like their kid brains are being rewired into adult brains. They are opperating in a construction zone with crazy-hormones to top it off. It's a wonder we survived it at all!

Is there a study explaining men? ;)

hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee

My oldest has been cruising since she was 18 months old, my second since she was 2. I have absolutely no issue taking my children with me on vacation, it is a time for our family to spend quality time together and make memories. They actually prefer cruising to Disney World. They grow up too fast, and in years to come, they will not want to go on vacation with us, so I am taking advantage of it now.

I've learned to put the ignorance regarding this ongoing argument behind me. As above posters, I've seen far more adults acting bratty and inappropriately on cruises than I have children.

Although not on a cruise, just a couple of weeks ago I took my DD's to Longhorn's for a special lunch before they started school. It was midweek, so there were quite a few professional people on business lunches, in addition to other parents with kids probably doing the same thing I was doing with mine. We were seated in a booth next to 3 men, ranging in age from 30's to early 50's, and I would describe them as professional workers. Every other word out of there mouth was the "f" word. I had to ask them to please watch their language, only one of these idiots actually got it and said to the other two, "come on guys, there's lots of kids in here". The other too morons, "too bad, this is the way we talk". Needless to say, I asked and we were moved. And, a few minutes later the GM came over to their table and they were asked to leave (I also overheard another parent complain). So, please, there are inconsiderate people everywhere.

OK, I didn't catch the post about there "never being a time when it's appropriate for a child the throw food or engage strangers in coverstation". (or something like that)

Alright, it's never good to throw food but that doesn't change that children are in the PROCESS of learning. Throwing food isn't exactly an unforgivable offense in the mistakes of childhood.

About children engaging others in conversations, well then I'm all sorts of wrong myself. I can't even intelligently address that one because it's just too ridiculous. (My husband -who is shy-says he's probably shy from mean people who scared him when he did try to talk).

Every time we engage a child we help teach them. If it's peek-a-boo or letting them practice their vocabulary, but mostly by showing patience and kindness! I feel that the world is a giant village and if you treat others with respect regardless of their age, or title etc...then you deserve to be a respected part of the village. If you can't play nice, you are walking away from the village.

About a study on men....Oh how I wish I knew of one! My husband chimed in that there have been studies but they have been too complex. They need something painfully simple to study them. He said it, not me! (he just told me he's very funny)

Have a good day all!

I see nothing wrong with kids throwing food, outside, once a year, during some special event, as long as there are points and prizes and the food will not harm the enviroment or hurt anyone.

As for kids engaging others in conversation. We live in a world where strangers can become friends. As long as I am with my boys I think talking to strangers can be a good way to teach them to interact with others. While schools segragate children by age the world does not. We live in a society where we have to talk and interact with people of all ages all the time. In fact I could make a good argument (but I won't) for kids spending time with lots of people of all ages rather than the closely regimented classroom setting. We all have to learn to get along and part of that is talking to others and engaging adults in meaningful conversation.

I see a lot of folks are taking exception to my opinion that children should never attempt to engage strangers in conversation in a dining venue. I wish I could say that there is a time... but it is my opinion that there isn't.

Scenario: I'm sitting at dinner with my DH, enjoying a quiet evening away from phones, dogs, kids... and someone's precocious 3 year old spends my entire dinner saying, "hi... I'm 3... hi... hi... puppy... hi..." That just irritates the heck out of me. I'll speak to children in public... honest I will. The little girl sitting in the shopping cart in front of me in line... I'll smile, say hi... tell her she has a pretty dress... whatever. But, on my terms! I know that sounds selfish, but if I wanted to spend time chatting up a toddler, I'd go to a preschool... or call my 3 1/2 year old grandson.

And I feel the need to point out that I am well known by my family & friends for stopping at a table in a restaraunt to tell a parent how impressed I am with how well their children are behaved. I especially enjoy doing this when there's another family allowing their children to run all over, throw food, and create a general atmosphere of a circus.