Hubby on Formal Night

[careywv]

Ok, so I enjoy dressing up and I can't wait to do so on our upcoming cruise. The hubby, however, is another story. Khaki shorts are his idea of dressing up. He's made a style for himself as "preppy gangsta" - think Pharrell or Kanye. (Examples below, except he would never wear flip flops. He would wear his Air Force One sneakers)

 

 

So my question is will he be the odd man out? Or is the formal dress more of a minority at dinner? In past cruises, we have skipped formal night due to this but I want to wear my dresses this year. :D

[CruiserNicole47]

I honestly think those are a little too casual for formal night. DBF dresses up more than that on casual night. That's just my opinion, but I really do think they'd rather him have a suit or at least pants and a button down. Shorts to me are a def. no... esp since the cruise compases usually say "no shorts in dining room" even on casual nights.

BUT I guess it depends on what ship you're on and if he wants to risk being asked to put pants on or feeling like an odd ball.

[careywv]

On Carnival, shorts are allowed or else we would have never eaten in the dining room on our last cruise. He feels it's his vacation, and he shouldn't have to wear pants. I know, I know. I'm just trying to persuade him.

 

On the other hand, I have no problem with the button downs or polo shirts, since we just purchased a pink one of both for him. Real men wear pink, right? :p

[cb at sea]

They won't keep him out of the dining room, but he will be the 'odd man out'...and doesn't he want to compliment your outfit...even a little?

I know my hubby would prefer shorts 24/7, too, but it's not THAT much of a hassle to slip on long pants and a jacket!!!

[Lucky Granny]

Amy, my DH feels the same way yours does about dressing up. On a Holland America cruise to Alaska last August, he refused to bring anything but his "Alaska" clothes (cargo pants, printed sports shirt with turkeys, outdoorsy jacket, dark sneakers, etc.) and said he would just skip the dining room and eat elsewhere. The HA ship fooled him: the buffet was closed by the time our seating time arrived and there was no where else on the ship to eat. He got into a discussion of this with some poor guy in a uniform who suggested that he call room service. He tried but they told him it would take an hour....so he went back to find the same uniform. This resulted in his getting room service immediately, including a free glass of wine, and the assurance that he could come to the next formal night dinner in his Alaska clothes....and he did that. I dressed up (not formal, but more like church) and he wore what he wanted. When we got to our table for 8 the next formal night, we were the only ones there. We saw our eating companions later in the cruise and they told us they skipped the formal dinner because they did not want to dress up. Too bad they didn't know Alaska clothes were acceptable.

[Lucky Granny]

Oh, yes, real men do wear pink.

[Sugar*Magnolia]

Nope, not even on casual night...

[poobears]

Even on Carnival shorts are not allowed on formal night and we have seen them ask a guy to leave that showed up in shorts so I wouldn't assume he'll be able to dine there.

 

While it's his vacation it's their resturaunt and simple respect says you follow at least the minimum dress code if you are going to go into an eating establishment on land or sea. If he can not man up enough to put on a pair of khakis then he can still eat at the buffet. No reason you can't wear your dresses and get pics. You dont' have to eat in the dining room to dress up.

[Jane110]

Yes, your husband will be the "odd man out" and shorts, tee shirt and sneakers are not appropriate for any night in the main dining room, and certainly not formal night. He might not be allowed in to dinner unless he puts his big boy pants on.

[Drew's Wife]

I think you will find that you will both be very uncomfortable if your husband should decide to wear these to the MDR on formal/elegant night, especially if you are dressed up.

Most of the people do tend to dress elegantly for the evening, and I know you said that you wanted to dress up. lf you plan to wear a cocktail dress or even a "nice Church" type dress, then your husband needs to dress accordingly, and wear the minimum of long pants, sport coat and a tie.

It will also give you a wonderful oportunity to have some nice pictures taken. And as others have stated, there is always the possibility that the Maitre'd might ask him to change clothes for the evening. That would be awful for both of you, and it's only for a couple of hours. Tell him you want him to "dress up with you" so that you can "Show him off".;):)

[ailuro]

If he can't be bothered making a little bit of effort to accompany his lovely wife who will no doubt be making the most of the opportunity to get dressed up.... then I'd tell him to eat room service while I went off and made the most of the chance to play dress up!

 

My DH is bringing his kilt, first chance he's had to wear the full outfit since his sister's wedding. We personally have few chances to dress up to the nines, it's nice to wear something out of the ordinary once in a while.:D

 

We did choose NCL so we wouldn't have to do it EVERY night though.;)

[careywv]

I think this might help me convince him to wear khakis for one night. Now I just have to buy some, and make sure they are in his luggage. :p

 

I'm gonna say it's a no go on the jacket though. We've gone to one dinner when he was required to a wear a jacket, and he hated the entire meal.

[smoothdancer]

I see from your upcoming cruises you are going on Carnival. I can tell you that on our last Carnival cruise men were in shorts on the formal night... Bear in mind that formal is optional on this line so he will be allowed in the dining room.... Still, on our cruise most men were in slacks on formal night so yes he will be the odd man out, but allowed to enter the dining room if this is a deal breaker for you.

[careywv]

I see from your upcoming cruises you are going on Carnival. I can tell you that on our last Carnival cruise men were in shorts on the formal night... Bear in mind that formal is optional on this line so he will be allowed in the dining room.... Still, on our cruise most men were in slacks on formal night so yes he will be the odd man out, but allowed to enter the dining room if this is a deal breaker for you.

 

Were these people wearing shorts and t-shirts? or were that at least wearing a polo or button front? He doesn't care being the odd man out - he just doesn't want to get turned away for dinner.

 

I'm kind of used to being more dressed up than he is, but I like his sense of style. I come from a family where my dad thought dressing up was a nice pair of dark Levi's and a button front. Although, my mom did get him in to a tux for my sister's and my wedding.

[Texaswinediva]

I have never understood why some men had rather wear a pair of shorts

to dinner in a nice dining room that a pair of long pants. I guess they

had rather show off their hairy legs and be out of place all evening.

I am most thankful that when my husband was alive I never had that

problem with him. He wanted to dress appropriately.

[careywv]

I think my husband just wants to be himself and comfortable. He may also want to show off his WVU tattoo - but he probably won't admit that. :p

[poobears]

Carnival has very few rules but no shorts on elegant night is one of them. I would never go in the dining room on elegant/formal night with DH in shorts. Hopefully you can change his mind. How putting on pants takes away from him being himself is beyond me. It's a pair of pants, shouldn't be a big deal.

 

From the carnival FAQs:

 

 

Cruise Elegant Dining Dress Code: Gentlemen - Dress slacks, dress shirts. We also suggest a sport coat. If you wish to wear suits and ties or tuxedos, by all means we invite you to do so. Ladies - Cocktail dresses, pantsuits, elegant skirts and blouses; if you‘d like to show off your evening gowns, that's great too!

 

Not permitted in the dining room during the Cruise Elegant dinner for ladies and gentlemen: shorts, gym shorts, T-shirts, beach flip-flops, bathing suit attire, jeans, cut-off jeans, sleeveless shirts for men, sportswear, and baseball hats.

[Lucky Granny]

I think most cruise lines, Holland American excepted (see my previous post), provide an alternative to the formal dining room for those who don't choose to dress up. My husband was willing to eat somewhere else to avoid having to dress up, which I think should have been his choice. He never thinks of going to a wedding, funeral, or other important occasion without coat and tie, when others are there who don't even own a coat and tie, so I don't object to his wanting to dress as he pleases on a cruise ship. When he is on a cruise ship, he wants to dress like he is on vacation....which to him means very informally. I don't see why other peoples' choice to get all dressed up to go eat in the same room they ate lunch in wearing shorts should require anyone to dress in a way he does not choose to dress. I don't care if he doesn't join me for dinner....I dress up enough to get in and I am willing to eat without him because I love the food. If the "dressers" can have their way, why can't the "non-dressers"? (I almost typed un-dressers.)

[Aelsantokie]

Carey....

Have you tried casual pants from Banana Republic and dress it up with a button down shirt?

 

My Dh doesn't particularly like the roughness of most khakis and although he would wear it prefers not to ( I think). My solution is to buy him the chinos from BR, they are softer and doesn't feel as stiff. Check out their bootcut chinos for roomier look or their straight fit gavin chinos.

 

OOOOHHH...and I am loving their linen/cotton blend pants....might have to get some for my DH now! :D

[betty em]

careywv,

 

If you could only drag him into a mice men's wear store and get him fitted properly for a suit by a knowledgeable professional, he might change his mind when he sees how sharp he can look, no matter his body type. DH resisted dressing up too, as did 3 DS, but once they were all outfitted for their body types, shapes, etc, they all now love to dress up, especially 2 of the sons. DH always said, "My body isn't made for suits, they don't fit right on me." I think he compared how he looked in off the rack suits to other men who were wearing well fitted suits and came up short. Now he's proud to dress up with me.

[poobears]

betty em My Dh use to say the same thing. He refused to wear suits because they don't fit his build. Well our first cruise came up a few years ago and he wanted to go to formal night but wouldn't go underdressed so we hit the mens warehouse suit store and got him a custom fitted suit. Since then he's never complained about dressing up again no matter the occassion. Just went and bought a new one for our upcoming cruise.

 

Just like women need dresses that fit properly to look and feel good, guys need a suit, sport coat or even khakis to fit properly to enjoy them.

[Drew's Wife]

betty em My Dh use to say the same thing. He refused to wear suits because they don't fit his build. Well our first cruise came up a few years ago and he wanted to go to formal night but wouldn't go underdressed so we hit the mens warehouse suit store and got him a custom fitted suit. Since then he's never complained about dressing up again no matter the occassion. Just went and bought a new one for our upcoming cruise.

 

Just like women need dresses that fit properly to look and feel good, guys need a suit, sport coat or even khakis to fit properly to enjoy them.

 

 

Hey, Poobear.... Drew came in from his Honor Guard meeting last night, and ask me if I wanted to go down to the Men's Wearhouse this morning for him to pick out a couple of new suits!;) Right now they have a wonderful sale going on....!:) I just love it when he surprises me with a question like that..:D We'll be leaving in just a little while...I hope he finds some things he likes...

[poobears]

Have fun suit shopping with Dh.

[Creeks]

I think my husband just wants to be himself and comfortable. . :p

 

My husband was himself and comfortable in his tux and looked fantastic!

Since we spent most of our time at home in shorts,

we had fun dressing up on cruises.

Wonderful memories! :)

[BroncosFan2010]

That is too casual for formal night. Either skip it, or convince DH to dress up.