I am Sailing with a friend. I'm 17, he is 18

[Blk_Amish]

Alone time. :)

 

I agree.

 

I tell everyone I can't stop like but I can interfere with it so I need to know who likes who:D

Edited January 20, 2014 by Blk_Amish

[greatam]

My husband would have called the police if an 18 year old man drove over to pick up his 15 year old DD.:eek:

 

IMHO, that would be a very over the top reaction.

 

We were both in HIGH SCHOOL Him a senior, me a junior even though I was only 15 (most juniors are 16). He also took me to both the senior prom when he was a senior and he took me to the senior prom when I was a senior but he was in college. There were a lot of senior girls who had their soldier boyfriends accompany them to the senior prom during the height of the Vietnam war when 18-19 year olds were being drafted daily. In fact, one of my closest friends started dating a guy while she was a sophomore (15), him a senior (turned 18 in March his senior year). They continued the relationship while he was overseas in Vietnam and just celebrated their 45 wedding anniversary.

Edited January 20, 2014 by greatam

[ithaca gal]

What's your definition of date because try as we might be can't stop people liking each other. If you give them permission to like then you can keep an eye on them and nip things when necessary. My DS girlfriend was not allowed to date. I was shocked to know her parents none dating rule when I wanted to team up with her mom to keep an eye out for the kids.

 

Request - give the kids permission so we can work together and keep them safe and they don't have to lie.

 

Give them permission so they don't have to lie? How about there are strict rules and consequences WHEN they lie?

[Sherlock43031]

IMHO, that would be a very over the top reaction.

 

We were both in HIGH SCHOOL Him a senior, me a junior even though I was only 15 (most juniors are 16). He also took me to both the senior prom when he was a senior and he took me to the senior prom when I was a senior but he was in college. There were a lot of senior girls who had their soldier boyfriends accompany them to the senior prom during the height of the Vietnam war when 18-19 year olds were being drafted daily. In fact, one of my closest friends started dating a guy while she was a sophomore (15), him a senior (turned 18 in March his senior year). They continued the relationship while he was overseas in Vietnam and just celebrated their 45 wedding anniversary.

 

exactly!

 

I wonder how some of these people would have ever survived the 60's.. weren't many 18yo men going on a cruise with mommy and wondering about what to do.

[Karysa]

IMHO, that would be a very over the top reaction.

 

We were both in HIGH SCHOOL Him a senior, me a junior even though I was only 15 (most juniors are 16). He also took me to both the senior prom when he was a senior and he took me to the senior prom when I was a senior but he was in college. There were a lot of senior girls who had their soldier boyfriends accompany them to the senior prom during the height of the Vietnam war when 18-19 year olds were being drafted daily. In fact, one of my closest friends started dating a guy while she was a sophomore (15), him a senior (turned 18 in March his senior year). They continued the relationship while he was overseas in Vietnam and just celebrated their 45 wedding anniversary.

 

You asked a question and I answered. I had rules in my house when I was growing up and there were rules for our kids to. No dating until 16 was a rule. For the record, my dad would not have let me date an 18 year old adult man when I was a 15 year old either.

 

Our youngest are going to turn 18 next month and about 4 months ago one of them said " We used to think that you were strict, but now we get it." Her twin agreed. Hearing that from them was like music to my ears.

 

I think that if you ran a poll, most of the parents of teenage daughters would not be too happy to find out that cruiseline teenclubs allow 18 year old men in with their 15 year old daughter and her nearly 15 year old cousin. Like I said before bumping this 17 and 11/12 month year old guy so that he can hang out with his 18 year old buddy at Adult comedy shows and the Quest is the best option to me if a rule is going to be tweaked.

[Blk_Amish]

Give them permission so they don't have to lie? How about there are strict rules and consequences WHEN they lie?

 

Yes, they don't have to lie about liking which is an natural act. What is the consequence after you found out they liked someone but was too scared to tell you. Strict rules and consequence with some children, on some issues, let them heck bent on doing it more so. I was one of those child and so far I think I have done better with mind with being open, caring, and listening. Dating/liking for some kids means holding hands or if you are in kindergarten pulling someone's hair

Edited January 20, 2014 by Blk_Amish

[Blk_Amish]

For the record, my dad would not have let me date an 18 year old adult man when I was a 15 year old either.

 

 

My DD is 15 and my son is 18. When my DS was a sophomore he had a girlfriend that was a senior. She had a car and came by to pick up by baby, heck NO. Yes, my DH was in the corner with a smile saying that's my boy but I knew there is a huge difference between a 15 and 18 years old so I stepped in. Yes, I understand there is like but I needed to nip that one.

 

I thought I was an over the top edgy teen. My son's senior year was a rude awakening for me, with how much pretty girls have changed. Most mothers with teenage sons will tell there is a new predictor in town, called pretty Suzie. I thought having a boy was easier but I was not ready for girls to set their eyes on him. My DD is 15, so no would not be happy or allow a 18 years old boy to pick her up. The age difference comes with a different overall maturity or stupidity level. Princess cruise groups 13 to 17 years old kids together, heck no, in my book.

 

What I could never understand is why parents think its ever OK, to let hormonal teenagers hang out together for a week without being in the midst of it. By the end of the cruise I have made countless passes by the teen club. The generation of teens today is not the ones from the our days. I am friends with my kids on FB, to keep and eye, and girls especially, have changed. This girl once told me I needed to give my son a break and let him be because he is a good kid, I just don't know it. Now he is a freshman in college and so are the girls who weren't allowed to date:eek:.

Edited January 20, 2014 by Blk_Amish

[Karysa]

My DD is 15 and my son is 18. When my DS was a sophomore he had a girlfriend that was a senior. She had a car and came by to pick up by baby, heck NO. Yes, my DH was in the corner with a smile saying that's my boy but I knew there is a huge difference between a 15 and 18 years old so I stepped in. Yes, I understand there is like but I needed to nip that one.

 

I thought I was an over the top edgy teen. My son's senior year was a rude awakening for me, with how much pretty girls have changed. Most mothers with teenage sons will tell there is a new predictor in town, called pretty Suzie. I thought having a boy was easier but I was not ready for girls to set their eyes on him. My DD is 15, so no would not be happy or allow a 18 years old boy to pick her up. The age difference comes with a different overall maturity or stupidity level. Princess cruise groups 13 to 17 years old kids together, heck no, in my book.

 

What I could never understand is why parents think its ever OK, to let hormonal teenagers hang out together for a week without being in the midst of it. By the end of the cruise I have made countless passes by the teen club. The generation of teens today is not the ones from the our days. I am friends with my kids on FB, to keep and eye, and girls especially, have changed. This girl once told me I needed to give my son a break and let him be because he is a good kid, I just don't know it. Now he is a freshman in college and so are the girls who weren't allowed to date:eek:.

 

Sad thing is that over the years I know of several ( being conservative here) of your so called " preditors" that dated early, got their hearts broken and were not mature enough to deal with it and ended up on antidepressants, in appointments with psychologists and psychiatrists, switched schools, and the list goes on. On one particular day I told my older sister, wow this raising teen girls is harder than I thought. Without missing a beat she said, "that's because you are a good parent" when you're going through it, it's easier to be a bad parent but once they are adults it's then when you see how it was all worth it". Hopefully my day will come.;):)

[Blk_Amish]

Sad thing is that over the years I know of several ( being conservative here) of your so called " preditors" that dated early, got their hearts broken and were not mature enough to deal with it and ended up on antidepressants, in appointments with psychologists and psychiatrists, switched schools, and the list goes on. On one particular day I told my older sister, wow this raising teen girls is harder than I thought. Without missing a beat she said, "that's because you are a good parent" when you're going through it, it's easier to be a bad parent but once they are adults it's then when you see how it was all worth it". Hopefully my day will come.;):)

 

Having a teen son is much harder than I anticipated because I never really prepared him for Pretty Suzie Q. There was an incident where a girl hit him then said it was an accident. I found out, so she cried and apologized. Dumb me felt sorry and did nothing to nip it. Darn, if this was my DD there would be no amount of crying that would have made a difference. Its hard raising teens but there is at least one thing I can agree with you on, a 18 years old within arms length of my 15 years old is a no no. Something needs to be nipped. I can't stop like but sometimes it has to be done out of arms reach.

 

Sadly, I think many see all male as dwags and therefore not as concern for the well being of boys. Maybe there is only parents with DD posts on these forums. Rarely I read, I don't want my teen son in certain situation but I don't. I tell him, one false accusation could change your world and life for good. Now we have to also teach them about Cougars. My friend's son is 25 dating a woman not much older than her.

Edited January 20, 2014 by Blk_Amish

[Karysa]

Having a teen son is much harder than I anticipated because I never really prepared him for Pretty Suzie Q. There was an incident where a girl hit him then said it was an accident. I found out, so she cried and apologized. Dumb me felt sorry and did nothing to nip it. Darn, if this was my DD there would be no amount of crying that would have made a difference. Its hard raising teens but there is at least one thing I can agree with you on, a 18 years old within arms length of my 15 years old is a no no. Something needs to be nipped. I can't stop like but sometimes it has to be done out of arms reach.

 

Sadly, I think many see all male as dwags and therefore not as concern for the well being of boys. Maybe there is only parents with DD posts on these forums. Rarely I read, I don't want my teen son in certain situation but I don't. Now I tell him, one false accusation could change your world and life for good. Now we have to also teach them about Cougars. My friend son is 25 dating a woman not much older than her.

 

Only have girls but they talk. Not one story where dear boy got his heart broken after "first love", saw psychiatrist, switched schools, on suicide watch etc but plenty of stories like this about girls that they know. The stories from boys usually involve the number of their "kills". Teen lingo that you would likely know.

 

Your last story is almost like the Song Stacy's mom! Lol

[greatam]

exactly!

 

I wonder how some of these people would have ever survived the 60's.. weren't many 18yo men going on a cruise with mommy and wondering about what to do.

 

Oh how true. These kids now days have lived under Mommy's skirts for waaaay too long. They come to apply for jobs at my offices every week. They can't think through the simplest problem, let alone anything complex. Everything in their lives has been controlled or take care of by Mom and Dad and they are far from being adults, especially those whose parents pampered them through college. We throw better than 80% of applications in the trash because they can't spell, don't know how to write in complete sentences (I am so tired of seeing Twitter/Facebook/email abbreviations in applications I could scream) and they can't answer the essay question about what to do in XXX situation in any way that makes sense.

 

When I was graduating from HS (and yes, I was a year younger than my entire class) EVERYONE and I do mean EVERYONE was either packing their stuff to get their first appt, going off to college or going to Boot Camp the day after graduation. No living at home with Mom and Dad until they "found themselves". And the last thing you wanted was to go with your parents on a vacation of any kind. You were old enough and mature enough to go on that vacation yourself. An entire group of us went to party graduation night. We ended up in Yosemite almost 300 miles from home. Parents probably weren't too happy (I know mine were pretty PO'd). But we were back Sunday night no worse for wear, had a great experience and we had to THINK IT ALL OUT OURSELVES from how much money we had, had much the gas was going to cost to get there and back, what we were going to eat and how much that was going to cost. NO Mommy/Daddy around to do it for us. GREAT learning experiences that few kids get anymore.

[Karysa]

Oh how true. These kids now days have lived under Mommy's skirts for waaaay too long. They come to apply for jobs at my offices every week. They can't think through the simplest problem, let alone anything complex. Everything in their lives has been controlled or take care of by Mom and Dad and they are far from being adults, especially those whose parents pampered them through college. We throw better than 80% of applications in the trash because they can't spell, don't know how to write in complete sentences (I am so tired of seeing Twitter/Facebook/email abbreviations in applications I could scream) and they can't answer the essay question about what to do in XXX situation in any way that makes sense.

 

When I was graduating from HS (and yes, I was a year younger than my entire class) EVERYONE and I do mean EVERYONE was either packing their stuff to get their first appt, going off to college or going to Boot Camp the day after graduation. No living at home with Mom and Dad until they "found themselves". And the last thing you wanted was to go with your parents on a vacation of any kind. You were old enough and mature enough to go on that vacation yourself. An entire group of us went to party graduation night. We ended up in Yosemite almost 300 miles from home. Parents probably weren't too happy (I know mine were pretty PO'd). But we were back Sunday night no worse for wear, had a great experience and we had to THINK IT ALL OUT OURSELVES from how much money we had, had much the gas was going to cost to get there and back, what we were going to eat and how much that was going to cost. NO Mommy/Daddy around to do it for us. GREAT learning experiences that few kids get anymore.

 

The last pope fired 400 priests from what I heard recently. Freedom for children came at a very high price for children born in the 60's whose parents grew up in a time of relative safe streets, where you could trust your neighbors and your youth leaders. They gave their children the same freedoms but the world was not the same.

Edited January 20, 2014 by Karysa
Punct., sp

[greatam]

No dating until 16 was a rule. For the record, my dad would not have let me date an 18 year old adult man when I was a 15 year old either.

 

So you are saying I should have been punished socially for skipping a grade in school? I was a 15 year old JUNIOR in HS. And just because my HS boyfriend happened to turn 18 in January of his senior year, my parents shouldn't have allowed me to go out with him??? What if his birthday was in July, as mine is. He would have only been 17. Would that have been OK?

 

Oh, I get it. 16 is the age to start dating. I was a SENIOR in HS when I was 16 (graduated when I was just 16). SO I get to miss out on the junior/senior prom, Homecoming dance and all the other things that YOUR 16 year old does? NOT very fair is it???

[Karysa]

So you are saying I should have been punished socially for skipping a grade in school? I was a 15 year old JUNIOR in HS. And just because my HS boyfriend happened to turn 18 in January of his senior year, my parents shouldn't have allowed me to go out with him??? What if his birthday was in July, as mine is. He would have only been 17. Would that have been OK?

 

Oh, I get it. 16 is the age to start dating. I was a SENIOR in HS when I was 16 (graduated when I was just 16). SO I get to miss out on the junior/senior prom, Homecoming dance and all the other things that YOUR 16 year old does? NOT very fair is it???

 

I actually couldn't care less what your parents rules were. Sorry if you think I should but I don't. You asked me what DH would do if my 15 yr old DD would have accepted a date from an 18 year old man. Apparently you did not like my answer. That is ok with me. Believe me when I say that.

Edited January 20, 2014 by Karysa

[Sherlock43031]

greatam

 

you are wasting your time with the folks that are infected with holierthanthouitis.

 

these are probably the same parent that have every minute of the kids free time planned down to the minute. the same folks who drive their HS kids to school instead of letting them walk or take the bus. same folks probably having a tracking chip in the kids cell phone so they know where they are.

 

working for a hospital we were big on summer interns.. generally college kids completing their freshman year. how these kids got in college I will never know. couldn't spell and grammar at a 5th grade level. more then a few would have their mother with them. the best thing that could happen to these kids is to restart the draft. it was a great motivator. when I got back from RVN the thought of moving back in with parents never crossed my mind.

[Karysa]

greatam

 

you are wasting your time with the folks that are infected with holierthanthouitis.

 

these are probably the same parent that have every minute of the kids free time planned down to the minute. the same folks who drive their HS kids to school instead of letting them walk or take the bus. same folks probably having a tracking chip in the kids cell phone so they know where they are.

 

working for a hospital we were big on summer interns.. generally college kids completing their freshman year. how these kids got in college I will never know. couldn't spell and grammar at a 5th grade level. more then a few would have their mother with them. the best thing that could happen to these kids is to restart the draft. it was a great motivator. when I got back from RVN the thought of moving back in with parents never crossed my mind.

 

Nothing holierthanthough about worrying about your own children and keeping your nose out of how others raise their children.

 

So many times on cc I read "parents let their children and teens run all over the ship bothering others." Now I am reading if you have rules set for your children then you are not raising them to be independent young adults. Seems like we can't win for trying.

Edited January 20, 2014 by Karysa

[Karysa]

See what I meant in my first post on this subject OP. Good thing that the flame retardant suit can be worn for the duration of the thread. :D

Edited January 20, 2014 by Karysa

[Sherlock43031]

rules are rules but to say my if a boy 18 showed up to pickup my 15yo my husband would call the police and ruin the rest of his life is beyond knee-jerk. at least 1/2 of a SR class is 18 before they grad.. the husband is acting like that I'm sure they can find somewhere to meet on the side. that guy didn't show for a date out of the blue.

[Karysa]

rules are rules but to say my if a boy 18 showed up to pickup my 15yo my husband would call the police and ruin the rest of his life is beyond knee-jerk. at least 1/2 of a SR class is 18 before they grad.. the husband is acting like that I'm sure they can find somewhere to meet on the side. that guy didn't show for a date out of the blue.

 

Actually where I live that may save this man. In other words a 15 year old is a minor. Adults need to be careful dating minors.

[LrgPizza]

I am sailing with a friend who is a year older than me. I'm worried we won't be able to do much stuff on the ship together. The thing that stinks is that I turn 18 the week after the cruise… I heard club 02 is cool but my friend wouldn't be aloud to go in there. Whats the best thing for us to do because we definitely want to make some friends of both genders...

 

I'm curious if this is a friendship or boyfriend/girlfriend situation?

[Karysa]

I'm curious if this is a friendship or boyfriend/girlfriend situation?

 

They are male friends sharing a cabin according to cc posts that the OP has made.

[iheartbda]

I know it varies by cruiseline but doesn't one person in a cabin have to be older than 17 or 18?

[Karysa]

I know it varies by cruiseline but doesn't one person in a cabin have to be older than 17 or 18?

 

This is not just a buddy trip. One of the teens parents will be on the ship. Carnival allows this as long as the rooms are near eachother.

Edited January 20, 2014 by Karysa

[greatam]

I actually couldn't care less what your parents rules were. Sorry if you think I should but I don't. You asked me what DH would do if my 15 yr old DD would have accepted a date from an 18 year old man. Apparently you did not like my answer. That is ok with me. Believe me when I say that.

 

I still can't understand your logic in the least. A LOT of seniors turn 18 during their senior year. My own step son was held back a year (TOTAL lack of attention to school work in first grade-MUCH more interested in sports) and actually turned 19 in May 29 of his senior year.

 

15 year old sophomores become 16 year old sophomores sometimes very early depending on how schools allows kids into school. My dear departed DH was born on Halloween, 1950. He had to pass a test to be was allowed in with the rest of his normal age group. So he was only 4 when he entered kindergarten and for the next two months. He was always one of the youngest, as was I.

 

SO you are still stating that my stepson, who was the star of just about every sport they had in high school, turned down well over 14 scholarships for baseball, 11 for wrestling and 9 for football (finally decided to go to University of Iowa on a full ride scholarship) WOULD NOT be allowed to date your 16 year old daughter while both were still in high school???

 

And my niece, who went to an uppity, uppity private school, has a Mensa IQ and skipped both 4th and 6th grades which made her a 12 yo going on 13 year old Freshman in HS was not allowed to date until she was almost 15. By then she was so far ahead scholastically, emotionally and mental maturity that the seniors in HS were just BORING. She had a VERY lonely junior year in HS until her older brother (with permission from her DAD started allowing her to go out with some of her older brothers friends). She blossomed. She graduated University of Colorado with a degree in Poly Sci and just finished her MBA at Wharton last spring. She has recently taken the tests to go to work for State, FBI, CIA (her dream-clandestine service) and Stratfor which would have her traveling all over the world at the very young age of 23. Did it hurt her to go out with older guys? Heck no, it was a definite learning experience to find out what she liked, who she didn't like and what kind of potential situations she MIGHT find herself in that were not to her liking and how to get out of them without calling Mommy or Daddy.

 

Talk about over protective and not allowing children to learn. IF the FUNDAMENTALS have been taught since day one, you obviously don't trust your children to do the right things.

[LrgPizza]

This is not just a buddy trip. One of the teens parents will be on the ship. Carnival allows this as long as the rooms are near eachother.

 

Okay, that clarifies A LOT! I was reading this completely under the wrong impression at first. Lol!