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Pride 6/26/2007 – A Twisted Review

JesterPlaying

By JesterPlaying,
in Carnival Cruise Lines

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JesterPlaying

JesterPlaying

Posted
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Let me just start out by saying this is one of my top 3 cruises of all time. Going out of Baltimore was fantastic, the ship was fabulous, the service superb, the food was delicious, the entertainment was exhilarating and I had a terrific time. Except for a few minor things that I will now go into excruciating detail in an attempt to demonstrate my critical eye, but that will only result in you questioning my first statement and my sanity.

 

When one travels on a cruise I believe you should always start out with an exacting list of expectations. This list should not be short and should accurately capture any niggling little thing that can help detract from your enjoyment of the cruise. Thus armed you will be able to plan for all the disappointments that are sure to occur and you can fully document them for your cruise review.

 

My first problem was with Carnival’s bad time management. When I travel I look forward to all the delays and waiting in line just getting to the ship. It gives me the opportunity to catch up on my reading. Not only did Carnival cut out 8 hours of travel time by sailing from a convenient port, but they also boarded us so efficiently that I barely turned the first page of “War and Peace” before being called to board.

 

Luckily, the cattle stampede of the first day Lido gorging did not disappoint and it gave me high hopes for a perfect Muster Drill. I couldn’t wait until we were all packed together like orange Pillsbury Dough Buoys and I could break out in song. This year I had practiced a great sea faring medley consisting of the “Gilligan’s Isle theme”, “Wreck of the Edmond Fitzgerald” and “My Heart Will Go On”. Just as I got to my first “Three Hour Tour chorus” and the drill was over. Weeks of vocal training down the tubes thanks to Carnival.

 

Space management by Carnival wasn’t much better. How can one know they are on a cruise unless they are tripping over their bags in their stateroom? All five of our bags and my golf clubs disappeared under the bed or into the closet. I reminded my wife to sue Carnival in the even I walked overboard thinking I was in a land based Resort Hotel room. Our spacious balcony was marred by the splattering of an incontinent Sea Gull. If Carnival won’t take up my suggestion of installing Aircraft Carrier Phalanx guns, the least they can do is post shotgun carrying crew members on deck to take care of those feathered vermin.

 

What will it take for Carnival to finally implement Psychological screening of passengers before doing table assignments? Or maybe they do and they thought it would be great fun to match us up with Bob the Chiropractor (not that there is anything wrong with that, some of my best friends use Chiropractors). Nice normal looking Bob, who within the first five minutes told us how he voluntarily (but unsuccessfully) evaded his income taxes and demonstrated how by touching his face he could win Bingo. Desert finally arrived as he was elucidating on how everything was run by the World Bank. While my wife so badly wanted to play with him, even she decided that the Lido buffet was a great alternative to hearing about his approach to Colon Therapy.

Speaking of food, since when did Carnival decide to deliver it hot and in ample portions was a good thing? I almost killed myself on the first night when they delivered my usual one of everything entrée order. It clearly did not consider my “Tepid Food” diet or my compulsion to eat every delicious thing put in front of me. Got to keep health first Carnival.

 

The Cruise Director completely failed in the critical area of announcements. Since when are two announcements per day adequate to direct passengers to those hilarious activities that produce all those YouTube moments? Did he really expect us to look at the Capers to see when we could dress up in women’s bras and do our best Tyra Banks cat walking? I mean, if my wife hadn’t pulled up his slack, instead of my slacks, I would have almost retained my dignity on this trip. Not to mention, that without the disruptive Bing Bonging I napped through the entire Hairy Chest contest.

 

Now I could go on about how Carnival failed to move Freeport so we had to endure 30 minutes of rain. Or how in Half Moon Cay I was deprived of one of my favorite scents “Eu de Off!” due to the lack of sand flies. Or that pesky Golf Pro who kept interrupting me with advice that actually worked. Or how the layout of the ship was too convenient and my wife could always find me. But if I did that you would think I am way too much of a complainer

 

Let me just end this with a warning to Carnival:

 

“If you run your cruises the same way as this one, I might just be forced to go enjoy myself again and you know what a pain I can be.”

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JaniceB

JaniceB

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Very amusing, I think I might have to try the Pride since I live in Maryland. The only thing holding me back is the next cruises stop in Port Canaveral. It is tough finding your itinerary.

 

Janice

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mom2tcdx2

mom2tcdx2

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Loved your review, it was great. We are sailing in September, we originally had a Disney cruise booked from Port Canaveral that we cancelled in order to leave from a port closer to home and save a little bit of money. I don't really like our itinerary, but as another poster stated once I could spend days circling out in the ocean and would be fine with me. Kind of liking the stop in Port Canaveral, we will use our passes to Sea World so that will help with the time there. We would also like to see the port etc as we will be driving back to Port Canaveral in December to take a cruise on the Dream.

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JesterPlaying

JesterPlaying

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After this trip I may pick all my vacations by embarkation port. Though I do miss the repacking of the shoes to get under the weight limit at the airport. We got there at 12:30, dropped the bags off, parked and had to trudge a whole 100 yards with our carry ons to the terminal. We were through check in and indulging in shore Excursion line standing by 1:30.

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n2knight

n2knight

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Sailing on the pride in September.

 

While we are on the subject of twisted reviews... Let me say all the info I have obtained here on Cruise critic will probably make my first cruise more enjoyable. I have avoided a few issues I may not have thought of in the first place in reading the posts here.

 

How do you expect me to work myself into a tirade aboard the ship about every little tiny little thing that goes wrong making my vacation miserable and providing some extra entertainment for others, as they watch me stomp around and waggling my finger at the poor people behind the pursers desk.

 

Guess I will just have to relax and actually enjoy it. Curses to you you helpful bunch of misfits.

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jamscckmc

jamscckmc

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Very entertaining review! How long did it take you to get there from Sterling? Any construction on 95 north? Was the exit clearly marked? Did you play golf in Freeport? If so, how was the course? Did you rent a cabana in HMC? Is that why you went right to the excursion desk? If so, which one did you rent and did you have shade? So many ??? :eek:Thanks!

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WhansaMi

WhansaMi

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Very entertaining review! How long did it take you to get there from Sterling? Any construction on 95 north? Was the exit clearly marked? Did you play golf in Freeport? If so, how was the course? Did you rent a cabana in HMC? Is that why you went right to the excursion desk? If so, which one did you rent and did you have shade? So many ??? :eek:Thanks!

 

I'm Jester's wife, so maybe I can answer a few of these for you.

 

There was no construction on the 26th. Go around the beltway, off at 95 N and, yes, the exit is clearly marked AND you can see the ship from the expressway. Very, very easy.

 

Yes, DH played golf in Freeport. It was an... adventure. I'll save that and let him tell you. :-)

 

Absolutely, rent a cabana at HMC. We got #6, purple. Great location, close to restrooms and a short walk to the main stage/barbeque area. Yes, there was a shade tree beside us. The only downside was that our hammock was *just* far away from us so that people thought it was a common hammock. No biggie - the overstuffed loungers were great, and I really appreciated the AC and fans. Go *as soon as you get on the ship*. They fill up quickly.

 

Hope this helps.

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sallyb

sallyb

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If I wasn't past final payment, I would cancel. I am so sorry all these things happened to you. I hope you noted all this on your comment card and also sent a letter to Guest Relations! You truly deserve compensation.

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JesterPlaying

JesterPlaying

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Very entertaining review! How long did it take you to get there from Sterling? Any construction on 95 north? Was the exit clearly marked? Did you play golf in Freeport? If so, how was the course? Did you rent a cabana in HMC? Is that why you went right to the excursion desk? If so, which one did you rent and did you have shade? So many ??? :eek:Thanks!

 

Would of taken an hour and 15 minutes, but Carnival gave us so much time the wife decided we could stop off at the mall on the way there. No construction, 395 bottlenecked a little at 95, but once off the ramp it flowed fine. Exit very clear, last one before toll. Played at golf in Freeport was the reef course as the Country Club just got aerated. Yep right to the excursion desk, got Number 6 (Purple). Bathroom nearby, plenty of shade, no hammock tho and 2 minutes to the food.

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DocF

DocF

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I enjoyed your review. Since I go on a cruise expecting to be on a ship for x days and to be well entertained and well fed, I rarely have any complaints. I'm sorry that you missed all these opportunities to be upset.:p

 

I certainly hope our August 21 cruise goes as smooth as yours.

 

Doc:D

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jamscckmc

jamscckmc

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To Jester and Mrs Jester:rolleyes: Thank you for answering all my ???. Now a few more:o Were you VIP to get on that quickly? WAs there alot of people lining up for cabanas? Did you have shade all day on your cabana porch? Was # 6 far enough away from the crowds? We hope to have as miserable time as you did!:cool:

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asylum575

asylum575

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You forgot to mention the guy who jumps the line during embarkation or the buffet (either works) then starts calling for his wife to come up and join him. Love that guy.

 

On our last cruise I couldn't help it , so I called him on it. I explained to him, the reason his wife was back there is because that's his place in line and that he jumped all these(pointing around) people. Then I just pleaded with him, if there was a catastophe, to please allow women and children first.:cool:

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