.......idle jottings

Wow, great info ho-hum, thanks!

 

Yes our guide will be taking us around to the wineries after a short tour of the town, but asked if we had any in particular that we wanted to visit. So, of course, I had to consult the oracle :D

 

I surely hope we don't get sideways with any &@/(&?% merlot...

Well it is obviously about the wine.

Chateau Petrus (in nearby Pomerol) is not far away either, so the top top wineries HH would love to visit are:

- Petrus

- Cheval Blanc

- Ausone

But whether they are open to the public, HH is not sure. HH has never visited these wineries.

HH would expect they would be very expensive too.

Ch.Figeac is open (80% sure) and is a very good house and pretty, so this is a fall back.

Many wineries talk about wine production: they are all the same.

So is there any point hearing about this. Yes a quick look but tasting is the point.

It is expected that regular wine buffs would spit.....so practice that spitting before you go. If you are already a spitter then forgive HH.

Spitting is quite an art: you dont want to dribble over your clothes and the tasting room table and floor ! Quelle horeure !

And if you cant see the chateaus then seeing the vineyards is a nice alternative: where these noble grapes grow. Seeing the orientation, geography, geology, weather and gnarled vines, even people tending them.

If the chateauxs are not open then HH would do a tutored wine tasting.

St.Emilion is so diverse (6 different soils) and a tasting would demonstrate this. Under someone expert, it is a real education. You learn about various wines and soils they are grown and how to taste wine (you detect so much more than "slurping").

Again you would spit. So if you are not imbibing then driving is OK. Check out spitting and tasting wine on a You Tube video. Sorry if you know already.

It is expected that regular wine buffs would spit.....so practice that spitting before you go. If you are already a spitter then forgive HH.

Spitting is quite an art: you dont want to dribble over your clothes and the tasting room table and floor ! Quelle horeure !

After the educational part of the day, go to a local "wine" restaurant order filet de boeuf avec frites and "tasting glasses" of whichever chateau you desire. They will hold a two or three of mouthfuls...that is all you need if you are choosing around six or so!

Forget the spitting this time...dribbling allowed.

P.S A bottle of Ch Ausone will probably be the same price as your entire trip.

Ho-Hum, how do you manage time to muse wine when the fate of Britain rests on the elections? Charlotte Rose for P.M.!

Yet again we are in awe as to the extent of Mr Hum’s influence…right to the top of the British Establishment. Princess Katherine, knowing that his Excellency Mr Hum was still absent on his Grand Spring Tour on the high seas, crossed her legs and gave a reverse push to ensure that the next Royal sprog did not burst out into the world without his reassuring presence in the old country.

Just as the wheels of his Excellency’s private jet produced a cloud of burnt rubber on touching the runway at the airfield next to his estate, the sound of a newborn’s wailing was heard from Harley Street. All over the land, to great cheers, very badly choreographed dancing in the street and the wearing of silly Union Jack apparel, the grateful nation welcomed home his Excellency. And the birth of little Charlotte was announced as well…

Queen Betty popped out to the local market to buy a new hat, Prince Phillip was heard to exclaim “bloody hell another mouth to feed, do they think we are made of money?” and Prince Harry was overcome with emotion at the thought of the Royal Family having a right pair of Charlies.

Little Prince George was brought to the hospital to see his new sister for the first time. Smiling and waving to the adoring crowds, things turned ugly pretty quickly inside. Appalled at the thought of this angelic child now taking all the limelight, a quick right hook wiped the smirk off the new born’s face. Pandemonium broke out and naughty Georgie was quickly rushed out the building by Prince William using the tradesman’s entrance at the rear. Back at Kensington Palace, Wills poured a large one and momentarily longed for the quiet days of Afghanistan.

Thanks your Majesty ;)

We are old hands at wine tasting in California. However, I never spit, as I will have spent considerable time on the nose, and only taste if the nose is good. I will dump the remainder of the glass after a sip or two if there are many wines to be tasted. But if it is particularly good, I won't let it go to waste :D

I actually rate each wine, on paper, and make notes. We will generally buy one or two bottles at each place, assuming they are good, then try them again at home. If they pass muster in a more thorough tasting, then we will either pick more up at a local wine merchant or order from the winery. Only for the most outstanding finds while out on tasting trips will we pick up a case on the spot.

We are fortunate that Southwest Airlines allows two checked bags free. We travel with carry on luggage and bring up to four boxes of wine back with us as checked luggage :)

We are looking forward to exploring the differences between new world wines and old world wines. We did a bit of that in Italy, but this will be more of a focus of the W&W trip.

Wow, Sundance, had no idea you were such a Wino. I guess I will have to only go on beer quests with you. I would be as underfoot as a St. Bernard puppy. For example, my favorite red wines are German.:eek::eek: See you in August at a nice brewpub. I can tell one nice Bitter from another. All is not lost.:D

Well, truthfully, all the wine snobbery occurred before discovering IPA :D

Welcome home Ho Hum...

........16.30- consider drafting the 'end of cruise' awards.

 

Only joking, enjoy your champagne. Bad result today!

We stayed up at least Poppy !

Oh Poppy there were only 39 of us and HH knew 15 of them from quite well to very, very well. Hell even stayed at their homes and vica versa.

And discovered two fellow additional passengers who follow this drivel and who had deduced who HH is. Oh and there are a few crew members too !

So you see Poppy it is probably not very wise to "spill the beans" and to be honest there were not too many "beans to spill" anyway as most fellow passengers have done the xings many times and are a cool crowd not generally prone to outrageous behaviour: demonstrative bonhomie yes but nothing nasty.

But there was one of the most shocking incidents onboard.

HH had just gone to bed so did not actually witness it but it seems one passenger, who was "a lot worse for wear" had convinced himself (and no one else) that a person had verbally conducted himself discriminatorily. Sorry HH cannot be more direct but suffice to say everybody present were baffled how this passenger could have made such an outrageous allegation based on the situation everybody witnessed and could not believe how the guy could have deduced such an outrageous allegation.

Truly the man was not "well in the head".

The individual selected for this wholly un-fair, publicly vented criticism was naturally very upset as were crew and passengers.

The cad knew he was completely wrong the next day after he sobered up and was "sheepish" for several days but never apologised, instead he obsequiously made overtly friendly gestures over the last few days to the offended individual by way of aplogising.

Now the funny thing is, he was a competitive kind of guy too and took a daily quiz contest, way too seriously. Up until the last two days, his team were in the lead and it all hinged on the last day when HH's team of "ne'er do wells" were neck and neck until one or two deciding questions were put; one of which was:

" Which sports team plays at Craven Cottage ?"

Get it Poppy, yes of course you do.

And to the rest of you, it just happens to be a football team whom HH has been following man and boy !

Very lucky or a devious plot ?

Whatever........you decide, HH cannot possibly say; well the guy was fuming and actually again made an un-sporting outburst much to the consternation of those participating in the quiz.

This time he was sober ! Not a very nice guy at all ...... HH had not said one word to this guy prior to this incident and naturally did not say one word to him afterwards. The cad. The bounder.

HH can let on about one other passenger.

She has a very famous (some say infamous) reputation and was sailing on the other boat. Blondie wanted to "take a peek" at this legend and engaged her in conversation whilst docked in Madeira where both boats were moored.

She appeared quite normal and was well presented and confident.....disappointingly.

During a conversation she told Blondie that she instructed the Captain how to leave the port at Bridgetown and how to dock at Madeira and welcomed the pilot onboard who greeted her by her full name !

All said very matter of fact.

How very peculiar.

Oh and there's so much more but HH will leave it at that.......

By all accounts she has calmed down and one fellow passenger said she was nice.

So there you have it.

One man's meat, is another man's poison as the kids on the street say.

There HH has done "gossiping like a fish wife" ......as if.

Oh Poppy is'nt the weather simply awful......soooo windy last night and now rainy.

Blondie has decided to turn up the heating too. Grey old England.

Still Bordeaux tastes soo good in this kind of weather.

Had a crew of gardeners in yesterday to spruce up the grounds for a visit by Sea Dream friends hailing from la Belgique.....fresh new leaves and small branches strewn the "pile".

The aftermath of Tornado Charlotte Elizabeth David !

A right royal tornado and no mistakin'.

After the educational part of the day, go to a local "wine" restaurant order filet de boeuf avec frites and "tasting glasses" of whichever chateau you desire. They will hold a two or three of mouthfuls...that is all you need if you are choosing around six or so!

 

Forget the spitting this time...dribbling allowed.

 

P.S A bottle of Ch Ausone will probably be the same price as your entire trip.

Haha……….great idea MACT.

Learning from a seasoned pro.

.......ooooooo HH can taste the sizzling steak on a hot cast-iron plate but would suggest the onglet cut (hanger steak to Americans: skirt steak to the English) instead of the too refined filet mignon cut: too genteel for HH.

It is the cut of the honest working French man.

Sorry to let the exulted (and oh so misplaced) opinion of HH slip, there's more to come.

Hope Sundance doesn’t fall for the 1947 Cheval Blanc that would fetch £ 6000 per bottle (yes, six thousand pounds) !

Loved the "Another Royal Rumpus" post.........so true, so true.

But what about the name ?

Charlotte Elizabeth Diana

Talk about keeping everyone happy, surprised they did'nt add Gaga too !

It is the cut of the honest working French man.

 

Loved the "Another Royal Rumpus" post.........so true, so true.

But what about the name ?

Charlotte Elizabeth Diana

Talk about keeping everyone happy, surprised they did'nt add Gaga too !

Mr Hum has found a new species..."the honest working French man"?????

I think there requires to be a national declaration followed by France announcing a week long down tools national holiday in celebration.

Oh lord...in a year or two watch for Diana being in the top three choices for a baby girl name. At least it will relegate the Britneys, or whatever gushing parents name their offspring now, down the list. Whatever happened to such dependable names as Gladys, Agnes, Gertrude and Aida? They sound a bit gaga now, don't they?

Ho-Hum, how do you manage time to muse wine when the fate of Britain rests on the elections? Charlotte Rose for P.M.!

HH sent off his postal vote.

God it's complicated !

Two ballot forms, two envelopes, complete the forms, put in one envelope, then that envelope in the other envelope.

There'll be quite a few spoilt ballots, that's for sure !

Really no point voting here as it is very right wing Conservative: hell the Conservative Association tried de-selecting the MP because he announced he "played for the other team", which came as a bit of a surprise to his wife !

The CA is run by 70 something, "blue rinse brigade" augmented by the "twin set and pearl town ladies": they are a formidable bunch and are all devotees of Margaret.

But the present incumbent is a good man. He supported HH having planes re-directed over his "pile" and supported HH and neighbours in having a solar farm booted out.

In turn HH supported him in his battle to remain our MP. To everyone's amazement, he won handsomely and the "night of the long knives" began soon after whereby he requested the committee members of the CA resign ! And one by one they did !

So HH is having a great deal of trouble following your deviant posts Butch just lately.

So HH had to Google this lady and ......boy o boy......a sex worker standing for Parliament !

Well as you know we have more parties to choose than you Americans including many parties offering a whole shade of opinion.

Among which are:

- Church of the Militant Elvis Party

- Monster Raving Looney Party

- Fancy Dress Party

- Shake Spear Party (who advocate speaking in olde English)

- Eccentric Party of Great Britain

So a sex worker ..... again !

It is "de rigeur" in Italy of course.

Topless lady candidates speaking ten to the dozen about how the shops do not provide clothes for the fuller figure ladies and such like.

Well getting back to Ms. Rose.

Her campaign proposal are.....surprise, surprise, not about the economy, defence or other trite concerns but about .....wait for it.......err Sex.

HH wont sully your intelligence any further but methinks there is something of the exhibitionist about her.

By the way Jimbo, writing this whilst watching "Pale Rider" ....... great is'nt it.

Oh the marshall and his deputies are all lining up in the street to kill Clint.....sorry must go.

The slightly chilled Chassagne-Montrachet is a perfect accompaniment with the bright, crisp light on the mountains in the distance. Love the hats too. HH has such a large head though nothing looks good. Same with sun-glasses.

Right between the eyes ! That's Clint for you.

Ho-Hum, how do you manage time to muse wine when the fate of Britain rests on the elections? Charlotte Rose for P.M.!

Charlotte Rose did'nt "stand" for election ........ no s******ing now !

She was considering standing for a constituency in Brighton, which lo and behold, has just been won by the Greens (they hope to have 2 in Parliament).

The Conservatives look as if they will be back in power.

The Scots have overwhelming voted for a Nationalist Party but the people recently voted to stay in the UK !

Well the posh party won !

Everybody is in disbelief...three party leaders of the next highest parties did the honourable thng and all resigned.

By God...how British can you get ......it's rhetorical.

The Scots...bless em .......a tiny part says "get rid of"

Never understood why the plucky Brits ever wanted to cede any sovereignty to the French, Belgians, etc....

Don't you know the British soldier is well respected, and feared, around the world? Something about your little islands' standing up to the world inspires folks everywhere. Don't ever become a vassle to the insipid mainland euros.

Seems there is hope you will soon be able to own semiautomic firearms, like Swiss children can :D

Host Dan, feel free to censor the political stuff, we'll understand :)

Whilst reading the editorial of Cruise News by Mundy Cruising (May, 2015) just recently, HH almost choked on his mushroom vol-au-vont when he read:

“Our old friend Pam Conover, former head of Seabourn, has been appointed new COO of Residensea, the company operating The World.

Meanwhile at SeaDream Yacht Club, Andreas Brynstad, son of Atle Brynstad, appears to be taking a more significant role”

So from: this is what you could have had to what we have now !

Sea Dream once had this world class figure as CEO and well......the rest is history.

Obviously the “significant role’ did not involve doing the SD xing blogs.

Yes, HH still “holds a torch” for Pam, ’tis true

A former Captain and Chief Officer from Sea Dream “jumped ship” for The World; soul-less vessel, if you ask HH.

Designed for the super-rich. No doubt Pam will “work her magic”; a formidably bright lady. Should be running as PM; a bit of the Margaret about her, though she has a better dress sense and speaks better. Pam that is.

Family home a few miles away from HH; yes the “posh part” too.

Dashed off an email congratulating her; no reply.

A forlorn, forgotten about Ho Hum.

Mr Hum has found a new species..."the honest working French man"?????

 

I think there requires to be a national declaration followed by France announcing a week long down tools national holiday in celebration.

 

Oh lord...in a year or two watch for Diana being in the top three choices for a baby girl name. At least it will relegate the Britneys, or whatever gushing parents name their offspring now, down the list. Whatever happened to such dependable names as Gladys, Agnes, Gertrude and Aida? They sound a bit gaga now, don't they?

Well of course you are quite right old chap but the hyperbole would'nt quite have been as uplifting for the noble cause of the simple onglet cut ..... and HH, when penning this drivel, had in mind, the hard working vignerons, each in their solitary work sitting on a small stool as he shifts along a row of vines pruning them on a mid-February early morn in the dismal grey, a light frost on the ground and with a light wind blowing over the concentrated, wrapped up, huddled artisan in his private world wondering whether the Gods will co-operate to make the forthcoming year, the vintage of the decade and imagining celebrating the occasion with his proud father who re-collects the great '82 and with his elderly grandfather who has a particular love for a less acclaimed vintage but which "spoke" a mysterious call from another dimension............maybe even "spiritual", yet he keeps this kind of musing deeply to himself and dwells on the taste in his aloneness.

The vigneron then arises and straightens his body, picks up his stool and secateurs and jumps into his white van parked askew on the grass verge off the narrow road separating hectares and hectares of greyey-brown gnarled crops still deeply asleep and oblivious to the delicate surgery that had been so carefully administered on them enabling them to be vigorous enough to provide yet another crop of fruit.

He drives home, collects a few baguettes along the way, opens the fridge, un-wraps the large steak wrapped in greased paper with that pink and white chequer pattern imprinted on it, leaving it time to gain room temperature and then lights the stove and places a cast-iron griddled plate thereupon.

He takes the cork from a half opened bottle and pours his own wine into a robust, tumbler and takes a gulp. Lifts a cut, liberally salts it both sides and spreads it on the hot plate whereupon it sizzles as the steak sears.

Another lusty gulp.

He detaches the steak from the plate and slaps it down again to complete the other side.

Another gulp.

Tears open the bread, made that morning, slips in the cut and bites down on the caramelised, slightly chewy meat.

The red wine coated mouth and taste buds that have become accustomed to the slightly rough tannin and earthy notes is primed for that first bite of caramelised, meat, which on chewing tastes slightly sweet.

Mmmmmmmmmm......

He would'nt do that with a filet, now, would he ?

Non, alors vive l'onglet !

Vive le vin et vive le vigneron.

In our new multi-cultural society ...... any young girl would be mercilessly bullied for such names you refer to; unless privilege or eccenticity, sheltered her from the hoi-poloi and there are quite a few outcrops of such people, still in British society in isolated pockets throughout this land ........ but for how long ?

And the bad news this morning, is the trouble brewing north of the "border".

It's true, is it not, that the politicians want independence but the electorate want to remain part of the UK ?

Another referendum ? Oh Gawd !!!!!

We stayed up at least Poppy !

 

Oh Poppy there were only 39 of us and HH knew 15 of them from quite well to very, very well. Hell even stayed at their homes and vica versa.

And discovered two fellow additional passengers who follow this drivel and who had deduced who HH is. Oh and there are a few crew members too !

 

So you see Poppy it is probably not very wise to "spill the beans" and to be honest there were not too many "beans to spill" anyway as most fellow passengers have done the xings many times and are a cool crowd not generally prone to outrageous behaviour: demonstrative bonhomie yes but nothing nasty.

 

But there was one of the most shocking incidents onboard.

 

HH had just gone to bed so did not actually witness it but it seems one passenger, who was "a lot worse for wear" had convinced himself (and no one else) that a person had verbally conducted himself discriminatorily. Sorry HH cannot be more direct but suffice to say everybody present were baffled how this passenger could have made such an outrageous allegation based on the situation everybody witnessed and could not believe how the guy could have deduced such an outrageous allegation.

Truly the man was not "well in the head".

The individual selected for this wholly un-fair, publicly vented criticism was naturally very upset as were crew and passengers.

The cad knew he was completely wrong the next day after he sobered up and was "sheepish" for several days but never apologised, instead he obsequiously made overtly friendly gestures over the last few days to the offended individual by way of aplogising.

 

Now the funny thing is, he was a competitive kind of guy too and took a daily quiz contest, way too seriously. Up until the last two days, his team were in the lead and it all hinged on the last day when HH's team of "ne'er do wells" were neck and neck until one or two deciding questions were put; one of which was:

" Which sports team plays at Craven Cottage ?"

 

Get it Poppy, yes of course you do.

And to the rest of you, it just happens to be a football team whom HH has been following man and boy !

Very lucky or a devious plot ?

Whatever........you decide, HH cannot possibly say; well the guy was fuming and actually again made an un-sporting outburst much to the consternation of those participating in the quiz.

This time he was sober ! Not a very nice guy at all ...... HH had not said one word to this guy prior to this incident and naturally did not say one word to him afterwards. The cad. The bounder.

 

HH can let on about one other passenger.

She has a very famous (some say infamous) reputation and was sailing on the other boat. Blondie wanted to "take a peek" at this legend and engaged her in conversation whilst docked in Madeira where both boats were moored.

She appeared quite normal and was well presented and confident.....disappointingly.

During a conversation she told Blondie that she instructed the Captain how to leave the port at Bridgetown and how to dock at Madeira and welcomed the pilot onboard who greeted her by her full name !

All said very matter of fact.

How very peculiar.

Oh and there's so much more but HH will leave it at that.......

By all accounts she has calmed down and one fellow passenger said she was nice.

So there you have it.

One man's meat, is another man's poison as the kids on the street say.

 

There HH has done "gossiping like a fish wife" ......as if.

 

Oh Poppy is'nt the weather simply awful......soooo windy last night and now rainy.

Blondie has decided to turn up the heating too. Grey old England.

Still Bordeaux tastes soo good in this kind of weather.

Had a crew of gardeners in yesterday to spruce up the grounds for a visit by Sea Dream friends hailing from la Belgique.....fresh new leaves and small branches strewn the "pile".

The aftermath of Tornado Charlotte Elizabeth David !

A right royal tornado and no mistakin'.

"Spilling Beans" and "Gossiping like a Fishwife" are what we pay you for Mr. Hum. When there is a famous personage aboard, we with the Prime Level Reportage subscriptions, expect names and dirt. Time to return to that which made you famous!:eek::D

"Spilling Beans" and "Gossiping like a Fishwife" are what we pay you for Mr. Hum. When there is a famous personage aboard, we with the Prime Level Reportage subscriptions, expect names and dirt. Time to return to that which made you famous!:eek::D

.....oooooooo get you ...... cheeky !

......yes sireee !

This thread is not just a gossip column for your salacious appetite young man ............. but at least you dont go as far as a certain "gentleman" who also demanded photos !!!

This HH will never do and if he cannot tell an event without concealing the true identity of the person/victim, then naturally he will remain "mum"....... But oh the stories you will miss !

You know Jimbo, the passengers on Sea Dream are the most refined and genteel people with an international view though proud of their home nation and are courteous and considerate to others.

That is one of the appeals of Sea Dream.........most simply want a relaxed, civilised time away with their loved ones and chums amongst similar like minded people but HH does hope for a fellow chum to behave very badly with from time to time.

And there a few characters of course like this who do turn up but if not, then like a young boy or probably an old fool, is a better description, HH loves to play with the boys and girls of the crew in a manner that shows respect, especially with the ladies though this can be less strictly adhered to if the crew are out in port after service at a club or bar.

The portly, geriatric HH is benevolently allowed to come along and no, it's not to pay for the drinks ..... you cynical bunch ....... it is the other way round until HH protests and they relent finally.

And these guys know how to party and they look so different out of their uniform.

It is a joy to be present with them and wonderful to see how they care for one another too.

Of course HH usually retires earlier thus not being a complete burden to these enjoyment starved youngsters.

What a great bunch they are and how they can dance.

Hum's moves are the tried and tested hip swaying and arm flailing .........HH is reluctant to call it style. No you would'nt have seen moves like it unless you have ever seen someone electrocuted ....... slowly.

On one occasion a young man thinking HH was suffering a kind of fit insisted HH's airways were open and pushed two fingers into his mouth which made it very difficult for Hum to explain that this was his own, carefully choreographed, individual, dance.

Thank God for others intervening to explain this was the "Hum".

Sadly the "Hum" never caught on.

HH is always aware not to be over-demonstrative or too ostentatious and certainly without a hint of sexuality in his dancing.

Wouldn't be allowed to "tag along" again with the crew, you see.

Talking about this kind of dancing; there was an incident onboard once at the TOYB at a disco night amongst passengers. A couple in their mid-40's, inspired by the film "Dirty Dancing" (stupid film, saw 5 minutes and switched over) were gyrating away with one another getting glances from bemused fellow passengers which they mistakenly believed was enjoyment and so misguidedly emboldened and permitted greater room by the fellow passengers standing back in incredulity, they continued their dance with greater movements and increasingly raunchy positioning of explicit sexual scenarios. Now theses moves had to have been rehearsed back home or even in a dance hall but obviously they had not made allowance for a slightly rolling ship, cramped setting, confined as it was by steps either side as well as guests seated at the two benches either side also and the timber grating which work as a kind of stiletto heel wearer deterrent preventing ladies from obtaining their own drinks at the bar just beyond........oh and a chap chum of ours who also occasionally "dons the heels" when the mood arises for dancing (he has lovely calf definition unfortunately they are quite hairy).

Sorry where was Hum ?

Oh yes, the writhing, 40 something couple .....did Ho Hum say their other obsession would seemed to have been discovering various "all you can eat buffets" around their home, which judging by their size, had been a long held interest.

At least the very energetic "dancing" must have lost at least 400 calories each.

She was dressed in a rather nice black dress which flailed out and a tight black blouse and a short, bright red scarf round her neck.....she also wore stockings and suspenders, as the latter were displayed for all to see at various points in the show.....really rather racy. He had been at the buffet counter more times than she and had a satin white shirt, now impregnated with sweat and tight brown trousers ....oh and Cuban heels; alas he still only came up to her ample chest, which would have created a nice bit of shade for him during the sunny days that followed, and especially as he was bereft of locks.

And then it happened !

People had been desperately trying to escape the impending carnage but the two stairs were blocked by this couple now entering an accelerated sexual frenzy of lusty thrusts and counter-thrusts alternated with the most peculiar facial expressions intended to be displays of orgasmic union and the like.

People were now panicking to get out: a party of four noticing a gap and exposing one of the stairs made a dash for it, two got down but the other two were crushed as the dancing couple returned back across the deck crashing into them who fell onto a party of six sitting around one of the benches. Un-deterred, they continued their dance nearer the bar and yes......you got it, nearer the wooden grating.......and then it happened. She wedged a heel down so hard into the grating, that it jammed tight, lifted the whole grating and she still continued dancing with an 8'0" long grating stuck to her foot !

Well not for long, obviously. The sweaty pile fell to the floor exposing much more than simply suspenders this time whilst the gentleman's trousers had ripped along the seam at the rear !

One passenger captivated by the performance and very well "lubricated" shouted "bravo, bravo, encore, encore" and was oblivious to the withering looks of the other passengers who were relieved the ordeal was over and left, shaking their heads in dis-belief by what they had, unfortunately witnessed........several, emotionally scarred for life: never to go to a disco, ever again.

Oh well...........ho hum.

He would'nt do that with a filet, now, would he ?

Non, alors vive l'onglet !

Vive le vin et vive le vigneron.

 

 

How so very wonderfully described. The French I will always be so indebted to.

 

And the bad news this morning, is the trouble brewing north of the "border".

It's true, is it not, that the politicians want independence but the electorate want to remain part of the UK ?

Another referendum ? Oh Gawd !!!!!

They be paradoxical testing times in Brigadoon, Mr Hum, paradoxical testing times.

We want to stay united so let’s send lots of representatives to the Big Smoke that wish to break us apart. And to think that the education system was once the envy of the world!

Desperate times could call for desperate measures…Before you know it, the washed and better tailored inhabitants of the cold north could be scrabbling over the Wall to set up home in the more pleasant land of Old England. So Mr Hum…is there a little patch of ground somewhere within your posh pad, perhaps under the bow of a great English oak that can offer shelter to a humble and most grateful family of new settlers?

Please don’t be thinking that a bunch of motley Beverley Hillbillies style immigrants will descend on your estate. I can assure you that Granny’s three remaining teeth are in good fettle and the little one is still small enough to be sent up the many chimneys of your impressive pad to sweep them on a regular basis. We are honest hard workers, eager to break sweat tilling the land during every second of daylight that the Lord provides and ready to do the Master’s bidding. Whilst we are partial to an ale, a sing song and a country dance on a Saturday evening, the image of kilted inebriated reprobates is far from reality, unless you wish it to be. And whilst we will always feel a bond to the land of our fathers, we would endeavour to learn Morris Dancing, willingly participate in your posh pad’s festival of antiques (check our pockets if need be) and be ready with a pitch perfect Land of Hope and Glory whenever we are in half a mile of such exalted company as yours.

It’s an imposition on you we concede but so much more palatable than the Brigadoon Inquisition that could soon be coming for us.

They be paradoxical testing times in Brigadoon, Mr Hum, paradoxical testing times.

 

We want to stay united so let’s send lots of representatives to the Big Smoke that wish to break us apart. And to think that the education system was once the envy of the world!

 

It’s an imposition on you we concede but so much more palatable than the Brigadoon Inquisition that could soon be coming for us.

MACT, you are still British.

For now, you can live wherever you wish; no allowance necessary.

But HH fears that the significant number of others of your inclination and who pay tax could leave.

And then who will be left to finance the Socialist proposals of financial support to those that remain, a significant proportion of which, make no financial contribution indeed they make a financial claim.

And businesses too will head South. The financial industry is worried about special powers to raise taxes on businesses.

With Trident base threatened closure, again a few thousand will be un-employed and money being "pumped" into that region, will end.

And was'nt the whole financial "give away" based on oil at $110 a barrel: now it is about half.

And did'nt they assume they would be allowed into the EU for more financial aid: no chance matey boy. Stavros has seen and end to that little trick. Just wait, Greece will leave the EU.

So old chap, you would not be in isolation.......but what a shame if it were to happen.

So far Cameron has held firm: no referendum.

Besides HH says stall the pro-Independence a few more years (ideally three or even four) to deflate the momentum and if the UK government is pushed for yet another referendum, then HH is certain the decision would remain the same.

Meanwhile we must allow the SNP to be "cock-a-hoop". No harm there, except some mild irritation. Some of the newly elected representatives look a particularly un-savoury bunch. It will be interesting how they get on at Westminster.

PMs question time will be a riot and with a recent in-effective Speaker due to his wife leaving him after being found to be having an affair with his step-brother......for nigh on a year !!!

Then PM's Question Time will be one big car crash.

You see now, why we go on Sea Dream !

Oh and one more thing. It does'nt help with Andy Murray finally playing better tennis and winning competitions !

This will simply create more patriotism.

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Haha.........they can have it......freedom from what ?

They want to join the EU....but the EU wont want scroungers

"Freedom of choice

Is what you got

Freedom from choice

Is what you want"

Devo

http://youtu.be/dVGINIsLnqU