Curious First Timer

I have heard alot of reference to Dorthy. Can someone tell me about her?

I am new to this but have been curious about it for a long time.

hey

Dorthy was the part Judy Garland played in the original Wizard of Oz. Gays sometime back identified with Judy Garland and hence Dorthy. Back before homosexuality was legal (you could be put in jail or worse sent to a mental hospital for an indeterminate period!) we had to have someway to recognize each other without getting caught by the law. Police would routinely invade our bars looking for homosexuals and would arrest them when they found them. One reason that the bars were in back alleys with a solid door that appeared to be a service door of some type. One way of the ways to identify each other was to be a friend of Dorthy. It was a code word that told you that the other guy was gay also. There are FOD (friends of dorthy) organizations in some areas. On quite a few cruise lines they still advertise get-togethers for FOD. This is somewhat comparable to FOB (friends of bill) gatherings which are composed of former alcoholics (AA).

Thank heavens homosexuality is legal now and in four states (maybe five soon) we can even get married. Thanks to Lawrence vs. Texas not too many years ago, all sodomy laws including those aimed solely at gays was declared unconstitional. We have come a long way since the 60's and before.

Thanks Satxdiver. In your opinion, are the meetings the best place to meet up?

Depending on the cruise line and even ship, the FOD meetings can be ok and other times you may be the only person there. On most Princess ships, the CD (cruise director) or assistant usually organizes the FOD meeting in a quiet bar and publishes it in the daily newsletter. On Royal Caribbean, pax have to organize their own FOD and it is definitely a hit or miss situation. If you see it posted, go and see who shows up but do not put your expectations too high. I definitely would not count on meeting someone at a FOD meeting.

BTW the crew certainly is well represented in our community. However they are not allowed to interact with the pax. If they get caught, they will be fired. I am not sure if you were aware of this.

BTW the crew certainly is well represented in our community. However they are not allowed to interact with the pax. If they

get caught, they will be fired. I am not sure if you were aware of this.

Another difference between a regular cruise and an RSVP charter: some levels of crew/staff are encouraged to attend parties etc. and they do! Hanky panky is a no-no, though.

Dorthy was the part Judy Garland played in the original Wizard of Oz. Gays sometime back identified with Judy Garland and hence Dorthy. Back before homosexuality was legal (you could be put in jail or worse sent to a mental hospital for an indeterminate period!) we had to have someway to recognize each other without getting caught by the law. Police would routinely invade our bars looking for homosexuals and would arrest them when they found them. One reason that the bars were in back alleys with a solid door that appeared to be a service door of some type. One way of the ways to identify each other was to be a friend of Dorthy. It was a code word that told you that the other guy was gay also. There are FOD (friends of dorthy) organizations in some areas. On quite a few cruise lines they still advertise get-togethers for FOD. This is somewhat comparable to FOB (friends of bill) gatherings which are composed of former alcoholics (AA).

 

Thank heavens homosexuality is legal now and in four states (maybe five soon) we can even get married. Thanks to Lawrence vs. Texas not too many years ago, all sodomy laws including those aimed solely at gays was declared unconstitional. We have come a long way since the 60's and before.

 

Thanks for the explaination, I didn't know what the FOD was about. My son is gay and traveling with me in June on Majesty and I will tell him about FOD.

thank you gentlemen, i appreciate the info. i know alot more now than i did before. i am new to this and don't want to appear stupid, but what does 'btw' and 'pax' mean? and if the fod meetings are a bust, what do you do to meet up or hook up with someone?

The use of FOD is an interesting debate which rolls on - younger people and other nationals in europe are less familiar with the term. I think it's Princess that uses GLBT in the daily sheet for its meetings. I appreciate that some members of the community prefer the more discrete term 'FOD' but to me I think it's time to use GLBT.

As an aside, we had a call from on of those 'direct purchase' warehouse places touting for business that was pleased to offer us a pass - seeing as we were an 'alternative couple' errrr no, we happen to be a couple. period. Guess whose business they won't be getting?

btw= by the way

pax= passengers

The use of FOD is an interesting debate which rolls on - younger people and other nationals in europe are less familiar with the term. I think it's Princess that uses GLBT in the daily sheet for its meetings. I appreciate that some members of the community prefer the more discrete term 'FOD' but to me I think it's time to use GLBT.

 

As an aside, we had a call from on of those 'direct purchase' warehouse places touting for business that was pleased to offer us a pass - seeing as we were an 'alternative couple' errrr no, we happen to be a couple. period. Guess whose business they won't be getting?

Yes, the debate goes on about FOD. Princess does post and support GLBT (not FOD) meetings every night with usually the assistant cruise director (CD) in attendance. One reason that I like Princess. RCL on the other hand "allows" pax to post FOD meetings on the bulletin board outside the pursar office. I view RCL as being less gay friendly.

Another difference between a regular cruise and an RSVP charter: some levels of crew/staff are encouraged to attend parties etc. and they do! Hanky panky is a no-no, though.

Hanky panky is a no-no, but it does happen quite a bit

Hello jgrtrac1... welcome to cruising!

There is a lot of "sub-rosa" conversations and hints about "hook-ups" on board... and I have met someone who insists it happened to him. But I have no first-hand experience... so what I opine is only gathered from heresay. :(

That said... here is what I "think."

A single, traveling alone has a better chance of an on-board romance.

There tends to be at least one bar that the staff and crew gather at... and you will have to be there a lot... and late.

There are differences between "crew," "staff," and "contract employees."

Crew will generally be the bartenders, servers, housekeeping, etc.

Staff can be officers, cruise director staff, etc.

Contract employees can be some of the entertainers, photographers, art auction staff, etc.

Crew is very hard to meet, much less than hook-up with. They are under a lot of supervision, work in only certain areas and are noticed if they appear elsewhere. Plus... they work at all hours, and if they get a moment to themselves, they have personal chores or just want to sleep.

Staff have more freedom to move around and mix with the passengers. But they are still under a lot of supervision... it all depends on who is doing the supervision. I have a feeling that if the Cruise Director is gay... some things are easier for gay staff, etc.

Fraternization is dangerous for the cruise lines because if a male passenger hooks up with a female passengers they have a lot of liability for sexual harassment, etc. Not so much with male-male... but still a rule is a rule.

Contract employees have the most freedom, but technically it is still forbidden. And some who appear to be contract employees are really staff, so it is hard to figure out.

Officers do have freedom... but only because he is "one of them." Company policy is still against it.

I have "come close" with an assistant Cruise Director and a photographer... but "close" is no cigar. :(

The other thing is "where." You certainly cannot go to crew quarters. The "better" room you have, the less likely you are to get him to your cabin. You need a cabin on a low deck, nearest to the near hidden access to the crew quarters. ;)

All in all... not very bright prospects for an on-board romance unless you buy a second ticket! And I am piecing this information together from only a few conversations with my "close to" meetings. In the end, it just wasn't worth it to spend all night hanging out in the bar waiting for that "magic moment."

Perhaps others will have hopeful comments, but usually everyone just says "it is forbidden... it won't happen." I think because it is too much work! But it sure makes for an interesting cruise imagining.... And I am a gregarious type anyway... so I chat them all up! :cool:

Let's hear more answers or speculation on your question.....