Thinking about leaving 2 year old at home...

[cupidsarrrow]

In my opinion do not distress over all of this. It is yours and your husbands dissission on this one. Like I stated previously we are taking our two older ones ( 8 and 12) and leaving our now three year old at home. She will be just fine with grandma, we want to take her but, having to literally run after her in the airport or on the ship I just dont want to do. The two older ones will be going to kids camp on days that they want to and I will be laying out relaxing with my husband. If not my kids will be laying out with me and will listen to yes you can or no you cant. As apposed to my baby, no just means DO IT!!

 

You will miss your 2 year of course, but like the other poster put bring her back something special and she will be delighted. Also just think of the hugs and kisses you will get when you return!! We also emailed home everynight to talk to our kids things like that! Go on the trip and have fun!!!!!

[SheilaNC]

Speaking as a Grandma (who does the baby-sitting) -- go and have some quality time with both your husband and your older children. It's so good for them to know that they have special privileges BECAUSE they're older and know how to behave. The little one will not only do well with Grandma, but Grandma will love being able to dote on just one at a time and cuddle the baby!

 

Make this a special time for your family and try not to stress out over what is a good decision for all.

 

Enjoy! And call home whenever you need to be reassured. Money well spent

[halos]

Hi. I'm soliciting opinions from experienced family cruisers...

 

Our extended family--26 people--are going on Holland America to Alaska in June to celebrate a big anniversary. But I don't know whether it would be worse to bring will-be-2-year-old or worse to leave with other side of the family.

 

I also have a will-be-5-year-old, and I think she will have a good time if we are there to help her out. But maybe not so good if she's expected to be good and just hang out while we deal with logistical complexities of 2 year old. I'd kind of like to focus on her having a good time and behaving well.

 

Our travel is a logistical nightmare. Holland America (I didn't plan this trip) seems to be geared toward older adults, and this cruise board if filled with people looking to such cruises to avoid little kids. The HAL kid program starts at 3, so my child won't be able to go in kids play area at all, nor use the pool. The excursions such as helicopter rides and rafting are too challenging for either child, nor do I really want to take them out in buses that won't accomodate car seats. Furthermore, Will be 2-year-old doesn't stay seated after eating and immediately wants to get up, which will be awkward at formal seated dinners. I picture myself walking overtired frustrated child around boat avoiding open staircases, elevators, and railings for 7 days while everyone else frollicks. Since this is the boat people choose to avoid young kids, we could get into some ugly stuff with fellow passengers if child acts up.

 

We'll all be sleeping in one cabin. Neither child is a good sleeper, and 2 year old screams frequently at night. We don't get much sleep on vacations. She should be easily audible in the adjoining cabins. Plus there a time change of a number of hours, so sleep patterns will be way out of whack.

 

We are 2 hours away from the airport. The flight is 11 hours long with a plane change in Chicago. Then we have to get a cab to a hotel, then another cab to the boat, then do everything in reverse after the cruise. My child screams in car seat. I can't imagine what the plane ride will be like with that kind of a day of travel. I'm sure the other passengers will be nasty to us.

 

We'll have 2 kids to move through airports, plus 2 car seats, plus carry on luggage and toys, stroller, plus 11 hours worth of snacks, since planes don't always have food. Ugh.

 

The Alaska weather can easily range from 20 degrees/snow/rain to 80 degrees. All 4 of us will need appropriate outerwear, plus casual and formalwear. And toys, sippy cups, diapers, wipes, snacks. I've heard HAL doesn't have diapers wipes or toys. That's a lot of luggage since only 2 of us can carry for 4 of us. That's assuming we're not carrying the kids, too.

 

Then I just read that thread about stomach flu on 2 adjoining HAL cruises.

 

So on one level, I'd like to leave 2 year old home with other set of grandparents and focus on older child, for whom this will be a big and exciting trip...

 

BUT...

 

I don't want 2 year old to miss being with this huge extended family for such a special event, especially since it may be the last big family trip. Even if she won't remember them, it's an opportunity for distant family to see her.

 

We feel horrible at the thought of leaving child out of big family vacation, since it is the only vacation we'll take for the year. A family vacation should include the whole family, right?

 

I'm a SAHM and am with child except for 2 hours a week plus the occasional weekend when she stays at grandparents. I'm afraid she will freak at being separated from me for so long. It will be 9ish days. What if grandparents can't handle freak outs if she really misses us or her sibling?

 

That's a long time for other grandparents to take care of her. Their house is so non babyproofed it is unbabyproofable, so they have to hover over her all the time. I think she's too much work for them. Plus she climbs out of crib and if does so in night could get ahold of choaking or other kinds of hazards. They will take very good care of her, but there are so many hazards and poisons in their house. I'm worried about leaving her for such a long time there.

 

I'd stay home myself except that the trip will be very big for 5 year old and I think she'll need me there.

 

So can't think of best solution--bring her admidst overwhelming challenges, or leave her which is so sad and a little scary...

 

What would you do?

 

 

I responded to you on another thread but I will again.

I totally understand how terrifying the thought of leaving your baby is but let's think rationally for a minute.

 

It's not like you read in the papers every day that children left with their grandparents die from choking on things or ingesting poisons. Your parents (or your in-laws) managed to raise children without 'losing' any. If they offered to watch your baby then by all means, I think they can hadle it.

I don't know if you grew up with grandparents as part of your life or not, but if you did, just think about how you felt when you were with them...I don't know about you but I cherished every moment with these people. I was spoiled rotten by them and every minute I had with them is a memory I'll cherish forever.

There is NOTHING as wonderfu for a child than to spend time with their grandparents.

I know you'll miss your baby. I was a SAHM too and I know you'd like to think that your child will just fall to pieces without you, in all honesty, that isn't the case...unless of course YOU make a big deal of it and act upset when you drop her off, which WILL make her upset.

The only one who will do any missing is YOU...your baby will be absolutely fine...I urge you to do what's in your heart in regards to taking or not taking her, but if you do decide to leave her behind, I GUARNTEE that the anticipation of leaving her is actually far worse than actually doing it.

She will be fine and so will you.

[halos]

I would simply have to pass on this trip. Neither option sounds fair to your 2 yr old.

 

 

I assume that you didn't have grandparents that you spent time with or had a relationship with or else you'd have never made that comment.

Leaving a 2 year old with doting grandparents who will spoil her silly and offer totally unconditional love and every minute of their time is hardly unfair.

[mariakitty]

We cruise every year and have always left our boys at home. On our Alaska cruise our son was 1 year and had a blast with grandma. Last year when we went to the Carribean he was 2 years and his brother was 6 months old - again they both had a great time with grandma. My mom is practically begging us to go on another vacation soon so that she can have the boys to herself.

 

I'm a SAHM, and I love my boys dearly, but I am very much looking forward to getting away from diapers, sippy cups, cartoons and all of their needs. You are entitled to have a break as well, and your little one will have a great time at home - much better than on the cruise I assure you. If you were going on a Disney cruise then maybe it would be something to consider taking your toddler, but definitely not on HAL.

 

I say go on your cruise, call home when you are in port and have a great time! :)

[alaskatwins]

and that is to leave our babies at home and forget the cruise altogether. We'll miss the big reunion and my mom's 70th birthday celebration but it became very clear (through these boards) that a HAL Alaska cruise was not welcoming for our twins (or for us, as parents).

hope you come to a decision that you feel comfortable with.

[kimmimom]

having just come off (today) a 7 day cruise wtih a 2 YO, 6 YO, and 11 YO, if your 2 YO can't go to the kids club, leave her home. Even with the kids club on carnival it was work. I talked to some in port from Holland America and they asked me how many kids were on our ship and I told them 120 (Miracle 1/15-06-1/22-06) and they said there were no more than 20 on theirs. Also, our ship was very largely older folks (65+) and we found that not many of them found our kids "cute". Hate to generalize, but many of them seemed bothered my kids in lines, kids in elevators, etc. I think you tend to have more mature folks on holland.

[Sandyone]

and that is to leave our babies at home and forget the cruise altogether. We'll miss the big reunion and my mom's 70th birthday celebration but it became very clear (through these boards) that a HAL Alaska cruise was not welcoming for our twins (or for us, as parents).

hope you come to a decision that you feel comfortable with.

 

Alaskatwins, I'm sorry that you won't be able to enjoy this family event. I'm sure it was a hard decision (made easier from the board traffic!), but I do think you'll be happiest with it. I'm from the school that believes that wee'uns oughtn't be separated from their moms and that they don't deal well with it. If we moms have to force ourselves to leave them and then miss them so incredibly much, how do the kids deal with it? They can't use logic and rationalize that they're being cared for and loved by Grandma and that they'll see Mom and Dad again in a few days. They all survive it, but I don't think it's as harmless as so many people think it is.

 

I hope that you don't catch grief from family and friends who think you should go. I'm sure you'll get all kinds of comments about how you are over-protective and that the kids will be just fine without you, etc. Life ain't always easy!

 

Mebbe you and your family can do something nice at home while the cruise is underway. I have a friend who lives zillions of miles away and she likes to make a birthday cake on my birthday so we can celebrate "together". Bet your mom would like that!

 

Sandy

[Sandyone]

I assume that you didn't have grandparents that you spent time with or had a relationship with or else you'd have never made that comment.

Leaving a 2 year old with doting grandparents who will spoil her silly and offer totally unconditional love and every minute of their time is hardly unfair.

 

I lived near my grandparents and remember weekends with them, but my kids have not had the luxury of such a relationship with their grandparents. We have always lived far away, but when we came to visit, many folks would try to convince us to go away for a day or weekend and leave the kids with Grandma. They were wrong...my kids wouldn't have done well (and poor Granny would've been totally wiped out from it!). Some of my kids are older now and I long to leave them with their grandparents...and when it happens, all will be ready for it.

 

I made that comment because I know what it's like to have a spirited child. Not all children enjoy extended days away from their mothers.

 

This 2 year old sounds familiar to me (as does all that travelling!). This is not a happy-go-lucky kid for whom change is seen as an adventure. Mom knows her daughter and I was just tossing in the less common view. And less common does not mean it is less accurate.

 

Bottom line (in case anyone is still wondering!) is that I don't believe young children should be separated from their mothers, no matter how loving the replacement caregiver is. Are they going to be seriously damaged? Nah, except in the extreme cases. But it's still not fair if the child isn't ready for such a separation.

 

Sandy

[halos]

Bottom line (in case anyone is still wondering!) is that I don't believe young children should be separated from their mothers, no matter how loving the replacement caregiver is. Are they going to be seriously damaged? Nah, except in the extreme cases. But it's still not fair if the child isn't ready for such a separation.

 

Sandy

 

With the world being as small as it is these days I have a feeling that my girls and their children won't be living close to my home either...things aren't what they used to be....that is why I will INSIST that I get to have the little ones with me, for days/weeks at a time so I CAN establish a relationship with them. I hope and pray that my girls will be willing to allow me to do just that. I'm thriled that I wasn't cheated out of a relationship with my grandparents and I don't want my (future) grandchildren to be cheated out of a relationship with me.

 

I don't believe as you do that young children are scarred if they spend time away from their mothers....we definitely have differing opinions on that...especially if that time is spent with a grandparent. Children know who love them. If they're getting that love from a grandparent for a week or so, how the heck can they be hurt from it?

I also think that if they learn (and YES they can even at that age) that Mommy does come back; then when they are 5 years old, you are less likely to have a child that screams if you leave them because they are used to you going and know you will return. I know this through experience.

[parrotthead]

I agree. Children learn 'Mommy goes and then she comes back...she will not leave me forever'. ( My girls had a video when they were young called "BabySongs" one of the songs is "My mommy comes back,she always comes back to get me...My mommy comes back , she never would forget me" ) I used to sing this little verse to them when I'd leave(for the store, or when they were a bit older , for work) and when they were older we'd sing it together...childern really do get it...your not leaving them for good. Even still ( girls are 17&18) we still say it (for fun) when I drop them off at school. :p

babytravler: had you thought about doing a 'dryrun' and letting the little one (or both) stay with grandma for say, a weekend and that might put your mind at ease...and you and dad could have some 'grownup time' ;)

I don't think time away from mom hurts children, (the fact that you leave them with proper caregivers is a given), I think it makes them more social and well adjusted.

[cupidsarrrow]

I totally disagree with it will hurt a child when mom leaves. In my opinion what about working moms who go away for 12 hours of the day? Sure she is home later but mom is gone isnt she? A child at that age doesnt have not concept of time so if Grandma is there that will be a thrill. When my son was born I stayed home all the time, gave up all extra fun time like golfing, fishing things like that cause whenever we went somewhere he would cry his head off. So I felt guilty leaving him. All the way up to play school he did this, I had to spend the day there as the helping mom so he could run and play. I didnt mind doing this but I wanted him to know it was okay and mom would be back. With my youngest I did not want to go through the same thing, when she was one we went on our first cruise and yes i cried when I left. I missed all three of them but I called home twice and emailed everynite to the older ones. Which definately helped. The when she was two we went to the Dominican for one week, I just love the feeling and looks on their faces when we walk in the door! the hugs and kisses went on for days...it was great. This time we are taking the two older and leaving her at home with Grandma. i feel guilty for leaving her, but she is so young and such a handful that during the day she would be fine but come evening she would be played out and that would mean I would be confined to the room.

This was your choice and I would not let what others think persuade your decision. Whether if someone thinks it is good or bad to leave her. You know how your child would act or not. Does she have sleep overs already with Grandma? You could start there just to see how she is with out you? Good luck and happy cruising when ever you decide.

[mruhaak]

I think those who have grandparents who they can leave their children with are lucky! My parents live quite a ways away and are older. Leaving my rambuctious 2.5DS and soon to be second son with them for any period of time would be too much for them. Not that they wouldn't be willing.

 

My DH's mother will help out sometimes but works full time and is busy caring for other more needy grandchildren.

[babytraveler]

Well, here' the latest.

 

DH simply cannot leave 2 year old home. Plus thinks his family would be way offended if any of us skip trip. So he insists she go.

 

I tried to get help from family for managing luggage and 2 kids for the flights, but they are all combining cruise with side vacations, so we're on our own.

 

Also, family has given me head up to remove child from sleeping area when she screams at night so that she doesn't wake them up.

 

DH is convinced that we'll be able to manage excursions and hikes with one child walking and 2 year old in an outgrown backpack carrier. He's used this carrier once, and child struggled to get out the whole time. That was a year ago.

 

DH thinks we can lighten our load by only bringing car seat for younger child. I'm not okay with that.

 

Wish me luck! I'm afraid I'm not going to have any patience for fellow passengers who give me a hard time. I think my times are going to be hard enough.

[snake114]

We travelled last year on HAL to Alaska with our 18-month-old. Actually had a great time with her! Staff and fellow passengers were wonderful towards her. In Juneau we rented a car, which was waiting for pickup across the street from the ship with car seat already installed!! Went to Mendenhall and hiking with a backpack carrier-lots of fun, and freedom to do things at our own pace.

 

Hope you have a great trip!!

 

Bruce

[Cruisin' Chick]

I think those who have grandparents who they can leave their children with are lucky! My parents live quite a ways away and are older. Leaving my rambuctious 2.5DS and soon to be second son with them for any period of time would be too much for them. Not that they wouldn't be willing.

 

My DH's mother will help out sometimes but works full time and is busy caring for other more needy grandchildren.

 

My girl tended to be a bit too high maintenance for the grandmas (82 and 70ish), no matter how much they insisted they could take care of her. So I quite understand.

 

My advice for this family is perhaps pad your traveling schedule so that you'll get into the departure city a day early. Then go to the local Target/Walmart/etc. and get the sippy cups, diapers, pull ups, whatever that would take up space in your luggage and carry on (just have the basic emergency ones for your flight). We've done this and it really saves us packing space.

[mollyeilis]

I replied to you on the other thread about negative experiences, and now I've read through this.

 

You have me VERY tempted to go on the same cruise, with our will-be-25 month old at that time, to support you! :D

 

I also live right near Seattle, and I have no idea if this sort of thing is ever offered or taken up on these boards, but...if you come into town the day before the cruise, I'd be HAPPY to take you to a local Target etc, to pick things up! MORE than happy. I'm a normal human with a now-20 month old and room for one more carseat and adult in my car...and I know it would be difficult to get to a Target, etc, by bus or cab.

 

Let me know, OK?

 

SeaTac airport is perhaps 30 minutes away from the cruise lines, but that's with perfect driving conditions. That doesn't happen that often around here, and summer is roadwork season, as it's relatively dry. Plan for delays. On the way back, plan for bigger delays, as SeaTac does like travelers to be around 2 hours early for flights. Leaving the same day, if the last flight is at 11am, will NOT work.

 

Definitely stay the day before and after. I'd be happy to help you find a hotel!

 

As for the excursions...wait, let me check the towns you stop in. I'm assuming it's the early June, from and to Seattle, cruise? I know Juneau and Ketchikan. In Juneau we got off the ship, found a tourbus, paid and got on. It's a schoolbus, and as you may or may not know, schoolbuses don't have seat belts. For anyone. So...your option is to find a car rental agency, hook up with them ahead of time, and rent a car to go up to the glacier there. But know that if *anyone* is taking a bus, none of them will have seatbelts, unless something has drastically changed about buses since I was in school, and since my dad was a Greyhound driver. They aren't considered necessary on buses, and in fact the seats and seat backs are created in certain ways to dispell forces blah blah blah.

 

We did a little hike at the Juneau place, and you know, everyone from every cruise ship is going to the *same place*. If you guys were on RCCL you'd be seeing people from HAL at every stop...the excursions are all the same spots! :D Anyway, the hike we did was odd, because the trail ended at some point and we just could NOT figure out how to get past.

 

This was our first stop, and it sort of put us off doing more excursions. When we got to Skagway hubby had us do a garden tour/tea tasting thing, but other than that, in Skagway and Ketchikan, all we did was wander the town. And it was perfectly fine, perfectly fun, and no, we weren't pretending we were hiking through Denali, but it was good! We got to meet the poeple who live in those cities (especially when we found an out of the way Mexican restaurant, and shopped at a tiny bookstore, in Juneau), rather than just spending more time with the poeple on our ship.

 

 

OK I'm going to leave this post at that, and give more thoughts in another post.

[mollyeilis]

Well, here' the latest.

 

DH simply cannot leave 2 year old home. Plus thinks his family would be way offended if any of us skip trip. So he insists she go.

 

I tried to get help from family for managing luggage and 2 kids for the flights, but they are all combining cruise with side vacations, so we're on our own.

 

Also, family has given me head up to remove child from sleeping area when she screams at night so that she doesn't wake them up.

 

DH is convinced that we'll be able to manage excursions and hikes with one child walking and 2 year old in an outgrown backpack carrier. He's used this carrier once, and child struggled to get out the whole time. That was a year ago.

 

DH thinks we can lighten our load by only bringing car seat for younger child. I'm not okay with that.

 

Wish me luck! I'm afraid I'm not going to have any patience for fellow passengers who give me a hard time. I think my times are going to be hard enough.

 

 

OK well I find it odd that the family insists on you going, but also will not tolerate a normal nighttime crying fit. Is there a chance to put the oldest and/or deafest family members on either side of you?

 

You have TIME to get a new backpack. Heck, I'll lend you the one I have!

 

I say this as a seasoned babywearer (I now have 4 pounch slings, one Maya sling, one Moby wrap, an Asian baby carrier, and various pieces of cloth that I used to wear DS with)...you also have TIME to get baby used to being carried in the backpack! :D

 

 

I have absolutely NO frame of reference for visiting with grandparents, as both my grandfathers were dead by the time I was born, my paternal grandmother was just evil and mean, and my dear sweet wonderful maternal grandmother lived in FL while we lived in CA. I canNOT fathom spending much time with a grandparent.

 

And I don't trust my dad, stepmom, or stepdad (my mom is dead) as far as I can throw 'em. They gave my dairy-intolerant son cheese (thankfully they were still there when he started screaming from the pain), they talk openly about giving him candy, my dad surely can't handle him physically, and my stepmom thinks what doesn't kill a kid makes him/her stronger. None of these people raised me, and while I love my half-sibs, they aren't fully grown yet, and I'm not liking what I'm seeing. My in laws are almost 70 and 80, are fragile, and would very likely shove meat down DS's vegetarian face, and would smack him.

 

So there's NO chance that any of the grands are watching my kids for any long amount of time, at least not until the kid(s) speak clearly, know what is wrong and right, and know that secrets are NOT to be kept.

 

Then again, I LOVE family reunions! I say bring YOUR parents! Make it a TRUE family reunion. ;)

 

Anyway, I'm all in favor of bringing both of your children. And am going to start a campaign to go on that cruise (we were thinking of the "meet the seahawks" HAL cruise in May, or a repositioning cruise on RCCL in May, so as to celebrate DS's birthday at sea), but now I want to go support you, so we'd both know there's at least one other 2 year old to play with!

[mollyeilis]

One more.

 

From HAL (http://www.hollandamerica.com/onboard/kids.do):

 

Holland America Line is dedicated to making your family's cruise vacation memorable and happy for each member of your family. We serve a wide variety of kid-pleasing food, including special sandwiches, tacos, hamburgers, hot dogs and pizza. Baby food, high chairs and booster seats may be requested in advance of boarding. Baby-sitting services are available for a small surcharge. Special kid friendly birthday parties can also be arranged with advance notice.

 

 

********

My husband would say that I'm "worst case scenario woman", and I'd agree. Whenever I leave the house, I am very aware that I might not come back. So someone saying:

 

Children learn 'Mommy goes and then she comes back...she will not leave me forever'. ( My girls had a video when they were young called "BabySongs" one of the songs is "My mommy comes back,she always comes back to get me...My mommy comes back , she never would forget me" )

 

...just freaks me out. Accidents happen. And hubby and I decided well before we got married that we would strive to travel together, as a family, whenever possible. We've broken that, for me to take a train for a family reunion when I was pregnant. And that trip felt SO BAD for both of us that we're working to NEVER have that happen again, at least not while DS and future children are minors, of course. :D

 

I'll close on that somber note...

[mruhaak]

Well, here' the latest.

 

DH simply cannot leave 2 year old home. Plus thinks his family would be way offended if any of us skip trip. So he insists she go.

 

I tried to get help from family for managing luggage and 2 kids for the flights, but they are all combining cruise with side vacations, so we're on our own.

 

Also, family has given me head up to remove child from sleeping area when she screams at night so that she doesn't wake them up.

 

DH is convinced that we'll be able to manage excursions and hikes with one child walking and 2 year old in an outgrown backpack carrier. He's used this carrier once, and child struggled to get out the whole time. That was a year ago.

 

DH thinks we can lighten our load by only bringing car seat for younger child. I'm not okay with that.

 

Wish me luck! I'm afraid I'm not going to have any patience for fellow passengers who give me a hard time. I think my times are going to be hard enough.

 

I think your DH and mine are related. ha ha ha.

 

If I were you I would try to get a cabin down the hall from the family. We were 12 cabins down from my mom and DH's grandma on the trip and that turned out to be a good thing. It was not too far to visit, but far enough that we weren't with each other every moment. That way it would be one less thing you have to be feeling bad about if your 2 year old is noisy. Then you can just feel bad about the strangers around you.

 

If you need to you can do it. It will just be challenge. Just be prepared. There are lots of tips on these boards. Read as many as you can and use them. But frankly I think your DH may be deluding himself a little as to how easy it will be on excursions...

 

By the way.... I think the "bring your parents" idea above is a good suggestion!!

[mruhaak]

My girl tended to be a bit too high maintenance for the grandmas (82 and 70ish)' date=' no matter how much they insisted they could take care of her. So I quite understand.

 

My advice for this family is perhaps pad your traveling schedule so that you'll get into the departure city a day early. Then go to the local Target/Walmart/etc. and get the sippy cups, diapers, pull ups, whatever that would take up space in your luggage and carry on (just have the basic emergency ones for your flight). We've done this and it really saves us packing space.[/quote']

 

This is a good idea about buying stuff there. My mom said "how in the world did you know how to pack enough diapers?" I only packed more than enough for the 3 day cruise. After that I knew we had a rental car and I was sure there were diapers available in Orlando too :p

[mom2cats]

We did the Carnival Valor in December with 2 kids, ages 5 and 2. We had to travel from NJ to FL. It was okay. I dreaded the trip every day for 6 months and almost cancelled several times. Ours was a family trip as well. Here are some of my suggestions for managing it.

 

-check your older child's car seat as luggage. It is not needed on the plane. Bring the smallest one you can find (booster?). You can also check it with your luggage when you board the cruise and it will be brought to your room.

 

-VERY IMPORTANT!!! Pack as lightly as possible. It can be done. Do not worry about offending other passengers if you repeat outfits or are not quite as fancy as they are. Go for neat and clean. Dressy tops are visable at dinner, your pants not so much. Send stuff out to be cleaned or washed halfway though your trip. It is SOO worth the money!

 

-Relax and try not to stress. I speak from experience.

 

-Plan on doing less than the others, and splitting up. Reseach your excursion options and look for relaxing beach days. Check the boards here to see what you could do on your own (ie taxi to a local beach). Even if you choose to stay on the ship with the little one, try to make it a fun day.

 

-practice eating out with your kids or sitting together at home and explaining about having to sit until everyone is done. Just work on it a little. Bring crayons for the dinner table on the ship. On our first cruise (Disney) with DS 2 we bought him a little ship & bus from the gift shop that amused him during dinner.

 

-if by any chance you can potty train the little one, the pools are an option for you.

 

The backpack is an okay idea, but very bulky and you do not need one more piece of luggage! Bring a small stroller.

 

Good luck!

[Bubba1234]

Thanks everybody. Hearing the insights for experienced parents and cruisers really does help. I'm 95% decided to leave daughter with grandparents. I hope it will work out for her (thanks for the assurances) but I sure will miss her and feel guilty, anyway.

 

If I only had her as the one child, I would definitely bring her and manage. But having to manage the needs, activities, moods, sleep etc. of 2 children is just too much under the circumstances. Probably better to focus on the older one having a great experience and behaving (I infer behavior is a hot topic on cruise ships).

 

Still, I'm thinking and pondering that remaing 5% right up until the day the final payment has to be made. I would hate to make a mistake and have a great flight and then find the whole ship filled with happy toddlers having fun and have left her home!

 

I have about one more month to agonize over the decision...

 

DH and I were JUST in a very similar situation, altho not with 26 people. His family (11 in total) planned a cruise. We wanted to go and struggled on whether or not to take our DD, 1 yr old. We ended up opting to let her stay with my parents, who she is very familiar with. Our DD is a very easy going baby, but I just didn't feel that a 1 yr old in the Caribbean in July would make for an enjoyable time for us, or the rest of the family, none of whom have young children. It was hard being away from her for a week, and I missed her, but we had a wonderful vacation, and when we got back she was happy to see us and she had a great time being spoiled by Gma & Gpa! All I'm saying is that it worked out well, and looking back on it I have zero regrets, and everything is fine!

[shellie100]

DH and I were JUST in a very similar situation, altho not with 26 people. His family (11 in total) planned a cruise. We wanted to go and struggled on whether or not to take our DD, 1 yr old. We ended up opting to let her stay with my parents, who she is very familiar with. Our DD is a very easy going baby, but I just didn't feel that a 1 yr old in the Caribbean in July would make for an enjoyable time for us, or the rest of the family, none of whom have young children. It was hard being away from her for a week, and I missed her, but we had a wonderful vacation, and when we got back she was happy to see us and she had a great time being spoiled by Gma & Gpa! All I'm saying is that it worked out well, and looking back on it I have zero regrets, and everything is fine!

I guess everyone's situation is different. My son would have flipped out if I had left him at 1-yr-old for a week. I think he barely would tolerate it now, at 3-yr-old. But I traveled so much with him that he was a good traveler, so that made a difference. I wouldn't want to test my kid's tolerance for traveling for the first time on a cruise, LOL! Anyway, glad you had a great time!!! And lucky you for having parents that would take on that kind of huge responsibility for a week!!!

[Dawniepoo]

Whatever you decide....don't let anyone make you feel guilty about your decision. Just have fun!

 

That is great advice!:D