Question for single parents who have travelled with their children

[kellyccz]

I am a single Mom to twin 13 year old boys and am taking them on their first cruise next March.

 

I have searched and read about the absent parent letter giving you permission to travel with the child, especially when debarking in Mexico.

 

My problem is I have no idea how to contact the biological father of my boys. I know he lives in Texas (I am in Illinois) - but I have no idea where, and apparently, neither does the Attorney General of Texas - Child Support Division, since they are unable to manage locating him and garnishing his wages for the over $20,000 in back child support he owes me, along with the measly $300/month he was ordered to pay years ago.

 

I have a copy of the court order for support, but we were never married so I don't have one that specifically gives me sole custody.

 

I am wanting to hear from those of you who have had similar circumstances to see what you did - from check in with Carnival, to disembarking at various ports (we will be going to Key West and Cozumel), to getting through customs & immigration upon the ship's return. I will be getting the boys state ID's and bringing their certified birth certificates, since passports will not be required until June of 2009.

 

I would love to hear any and all of your experiences.

 

Thank you!

[jensing317]

I am a single mother and not only have I taken my DS on two cruises (with no problems...knock on wood) but I also live in Texas and have to deal with the Texas AG /Child support unit. I KNOW your pain and frustration. BELIEVE ME!!!

 

First question is, does his name show on their birth certificates? If no, then you have no problem.

 

If it does, your court order for support should say something about you having sole custody which gives you the right to say where they live and what they do. I was told to take these papers with me, which I did, but never had to show them.

 

When we went through customs on both trips, they would ask DS what his name was, what his birthdate is, who I was, who grandma was, where was his dad, etc. Everytime he got to that question, he would say, I don't have one. I have a mommy and a grandma. They would then ask him if he had a good time and told him thanks for answering their questions.

 

You might also call the Texas AG for a letter stating that they cannot find him and he is unlocatable. (is that a word?!?!:rolleyes: ) If you talk to the right person, you might get some sympathy.

 

My lawyer gave me another idea but you'll have to email me for that one. I don't want to get flamed.

 

jensing317@aim.com

 

Good luck. Let me know if I can help.

 

Jennifer

[kellyccz]

Yes, his name is on the birth certificate.

 

No, the court order (done by the Texas AG office through the court there in Amarillo) is just one ordering him declaring him the father, ordering him to pay support, provide insurance, etc.

 

I was guessing in the end it really wouldn't turn out to be that big of a deal, but just wanted to hear from some of you who have actually experienced this recently.

[NCTribeFan]

I'm a single mom and DD & I just completed our 7th cruise last week. We never had any problem with just the two of us sailing. Never had anything from her father.

 

Of course, she's had a passport since she was 2, when her father and I were still together. His name is NOT on her birth certificate, but he may have signed her original passport application. No idea, really.

 

Check into what is necessary on the passport applications. If the father's signature is not required, perhaps getting those will make things easier.

 

I don't think there's a straightforward answer that anyone here can give you. Have you called Carnival to ask? You may get 10 different answers from 10 different people, but I would give it a try.

 

Good luck! I'm not sure what I'm going to do after DD graduates and gets a job. I know she'd continue cruising with me as long as I was willing to pay!

[doctordi]

I don't have a direct answer to your question, but I travel with my three children out of the country on a relatively frequent basis - My husband can't cruise - and while I take a letter stating that I have his permission to take them out of the country, I have never been asked for it.

[ShillyShally]

A father's signature is required for passports but I think only for children under 14 so perhaps you can apply after they are 14 and that might help avoid the bc issue.

 

I would recommend you do try to get a letter that he is unlocatable just to have with you, and your support papers but I doubt you'll be asked for them.

 

Goodluck and I am so glad you get to take this trip with them!

[mom2girls]

I honestly feel for you! I am a single mother. And, I have traveled with my girls. But, I am lucky to have an ex-husband who will sign a letter and have it notarized stating I can take them out of the country.

 

If I were you I would contact someone at your local courthouse, and ask them about getting paperwork regarding having sole custody. Since the children's father owes so much in back support, and he doesn't live anywhere near by this shoudn't be a problem. But, it may cost you a little because you may need to get a lawyer.

 

Good luck, and let us know how it turns out.

[kellyccz]

Thanks everyone for your helpful answers. I guess I will just take the only paperwork I have - the support order and I can type up a notarized letter stating he is not locatable. Maybe I can get the Texas Attorney General's Child Support Division to send me something saying they do not know where he is.

 

From the sound of it, it doesn't look like it will be a problem, but better to take what I have and deal with it from there.

 

Thanks again everyone.

[noahsark99]

I have cruised 4 times with my son. Sometimes I had a notorized letter from his father, sometimes not. I have never been asked to show anything other than birth certificate or passport and I've never been questioned.

 

Good luck and enjoy your cruise!

 

Looks like you are leaving a couple days after my son and I leave on the Glory...too bad we weren't on the same cruise.

[crusinpsychRN]

When they asked my son who is this woman you're with he answered "I don't know." I just about brained him. He's always been such a kidder. The Customs official got a big kick out of it and knew he was kidding, especially since the kid is most likely a clone, he looks exactly like me.

[KLLund]

Sorry I just can't help this one .. If the Texas AG office will not provide a letter stating that they cannot locate him .. tell them fine .. then where is my money if you can locate him!! I somehow suspect you will get the letter easily without needing to do this however.

[Hurry&Wait]

I am a single Mom to twin 13 year old boys and am taking them on their first cruise next March.

 

I have searched and read about the absent parent letter giving you permission to travel with the child, especially when debarking in Mexico.

 

My problem is I have no idea how to contact the biological father of my boys. I know he lives in Texas (I am in Illinois) - but I have no idea where, and apparently, neither does the Attorney General of Texas - Child Support Division, since they are unable to manage locating him and garnishing his wages for the over $20,000 in back child support he owes me, along with the measly $300/month he was ordered to pay years ago.

 

I have a copy of the court order for support, but we were never married so I don't have one that specifically gives me sole custody.

 

I am wanting to hear from those of you who have had similar circumstances to see what you did - from check in with Carnival, to disembarking at various ports (we will be going to Key West and Cozumel), to getting through customs & immigration upon the ship's return. I will be getting the boys state ID's and bringing their certified birth certificates, since passports will not be required until June of 2009.

 

I would love to hear any and all of your experiences.

 

Thank you!

 

Kelly,

 

Since your cruise is not until March, you have a lot of options. However, your biggest problem seems to be that of a very poorly worded court Order.

 

Instead of crossing your fingers at embarkation, I suggest that you file a Motion for Modification of the current Court order in Texas (this should be very easy) or for new support Orders in Illinois. You can do this Pro per with very little cost (pay a process server to find the dad and if not found, post service in a local paper) and since father cannot be found and far behind in CS, will probably go absent opposition.

 

You can then have the records straight and reflect that you are Sole Custodian. Your travel and other child related issues will be much easier.

 

Just my two cents worth.