Can I ask...

How does a Bi M/F couple fit into the crowd on a cruise? Would we be welcome at an FOD meeting? We've been on three cruises together but always with friends and/or family and our next one is just us. We would be interested in meeting other like minded people but never have tried nor do we know how to go about it.

The worst that can happen is we enjoy our cruise no matter what!

Thanks

How does a Bi M/F couple fit into the crowd on a cruise? Would we be welcome at an FOD meeting? We've been on three cruises together but always with friends and/or family and our next one is just us. We would be interested in meeting other like minded people but never have tried nor do we know how to go about it.

 

The worst that can happen is we enjoy our cruise no matter what!

 

Thanks

Most cruise lines host GLBT/FOD parties. The "B" indicate Bi-sexual and thus you would be welcomed. A gathering should be listed in the ship's newsletter except for RCI or Celebrity who own list group gatherings in the community bulletin board near guest relation and there is usually a set meeting time. I would advise you to attend one of these gatherings. You can go together or separate. Anyone is welcome at these gatherings including straights people although I doubt many would attend unless they are traveling with someone GLBT. They are informal (no-host) however, sometimes the cruise staff might stop by and socialized. You don't need to let anyone know you are a couple, but if someone ask your can discreetly let them know your are a bi-sexual couple. I really don't think anyone cares what your sexual orientation is and why should it? That's it - Just go and enjoy good conversation and company. Who know who you might meet - maybe even another Bisexual couple. Certainly if you meet others that you connect with your can arrange to meet again. Many times you might run into them around the ship. Some GLBT couples/individuals simple aren't interest in mingling with other GBLT people and you must respect their privacy. You can read more about GLBT gatherings here on Cruisecritic:

http://www.cruisecritic.com/articles.cfm?ID=188

Also, you can go to the top of the GLBT boards here on CC and go to Roll Calls and see if someone has started a thread for your sailing date and ship and if not you are free to start one yourself and maybe connect with other GLBT people before your cruise. Happy cruising.

Thanks. I did know about the "B" but we just weren't sure if couples like us would be well received. We aren't exactly active in that community in our home town.

Even straight couples come to the GBLT meetings. Everyone is welcome. No problems at all.;)

Just got back from a cruise and the glbt meetings were very well attended and included glb. It was a great experience, with groups breaking off for dinner, excursions, etc. Enjoy!

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Hi SR,

We've been on a number of cruise lines, but none of our FODs had a B or a T or a straight, although we have had singles. In the end, they were all there to enhance their vacation. You'll see the people are just as eclectic as any other group - some you'll want to stay clear of, but most are great - and let's face it, you're only with them for a week or two.

about this very topic. We are a bisexual couple with a preference for mmw. We were not sure if we would be welcome at these particular groups, but would love to meet someone during our cruise. We are going on RC Grandeur of the Seas 11/29/14. How can we go about talking to other like minded individuals before we sale?

Even straight couples come to the GBLT meetings. Everyone is welcome. No problems at all.;)

We've had at least one bi couple that I know of come to the meetings, and they were more than welcome. Same with the straight mother who showed up with her gay son.

But my feeling is that straight couples should refrain from attending, even if they simply love hanging out with queer folks. They have the rest of the cruise to do that. Same as I wouldn't go to a Red Hat Society meeting, much as I love hanging with cool older women. Just seems considerate of other peoples' space….

We had a bi guy and his girlfriend come to the LGBT meeting on one cruise. I think everyone was fine with them. We finally had the T represented at the meetings on a cruise last year. The mother of a young gay man came to our meetings last year on another cruise. He was a senior in high school, and we all loved her and her attitude. The only time I've seen someone not welcome at a meeting was the preacher who showed up a couple of weeks ago at a meeting on a Princess cruise. That group wasn't very large or strong. We saw the rest of the guys throughout the ship, but the meetings weren't publicized again and we never met formally after he said he'd be back.

Thank you both for your responses. My hubs and I wouldn't want to offend anyone or make ourselves present in a situation where we were not particularly wanted but everyone was too polite to say so. We just enjoy being with others that understand our lifestyle and are okay with us being us.

My limited experiences with FoD meetings were that all were monosexual individuals having a great vacation. I think most would agree that greater diversity only augments the experience. More importantly, perhaps, is that all would agree that cruises should be fun & inclusive of all. Be yourselves, have fun. Others will be grateful for your courage & impressed by your commitment.

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Just the way that gay bars are going the way of the dinosaur in all but the most popular gay destinations, the whole exclusion thing is, too. In the 80's and 90's gay bars and FOD's really served a purpose of giving a safe space for us to meet and greet. As our society keeps evolving, that's just not how it is anymore. My 23 year old nieces don't understand why we even need gay bars anymore. All of their friends, no matter what orientation they may be, hang out together. No one cares.

FOD parties aren't even called FOD parties on RCI anymore. There are lots of LGBT people who don't even know what that means.

If they aren't already - and it seems like they just may be - a gathering like this on the cruise should be inclusive and be about socializing with other great, accepting people. Just my opinion.

So I hope the OP goes to a gathering and has a great time. I think in most cases, they will.

But my feeling is that straight couples should refrain from attending, even if they simply love hanging out with queer folks.

I disagree. We often travel with straight couples, and they usually join us at the FOD get togethers. I wouldn't want to just leave others in our party hanging by themselves. If someone brings their straight parents, or other straight members of their party, I don't see anything wrong with this as long as everyone enjoys themselves.

I disagree. We often travel with straight couples, and they usually join us at the FOD get togethers. I wouldn't want to just leave others in our party hanging by themselves. If someone brings their straight parents, or other straight members of their party, I don't see anything wrong with this as long as everyone enjoys themselves.

So, um, what's the point of having an LGBT meeting in the first place? I know I'm a "dinosaur," but I still feel there are some commonalities among queer people that most hets don't share. For example, I feel that talking about my open marriage is easier around gay men, many of whom know guys in open relationships, than among most straights. Maybe after The Great Post-gay Assimilation is complete, things will be different, but....

I really don't see the problem with queers, people of color, straight singles, women, Jews, whatever, having their own designated social space. It seems to me that respecting that is a matter of both politics and manners. As a white male, I'm aware of my own inborn privilege, and I wouldn't just assume I'd be welcome at a meeting for African-American women.

Surely in an environment that's 95% straight, your het friends, be they ever so insecure, could find something else to do for an hour or two.

LGBT stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender so if you identify as such or support your friends who are you should be welcome.

However, for some reason gay group cruises are primarily either gay male or lesbian women. I didn't see any bi women or lesbians on the gay group or gay charter cruises I've been on. Thus I suspect that a bi woman looking to meet other women would not have much luck.

gwsm ,just booked carnival splendor oct.11 ny to canada. Is anyone else going ? Am I on the wrong thread ,thanks

As our society keeps evolving, that's just not how it is anymore. My 23 year old nieces don't understand why we even need gay bars anymore. All of their friends, no matter what orientation they may be, hang out together. No one cares.

Well, I suppose that compared to a hip 23-y.o. (presumably) straight woman, I'm a throwback.

I socialize a lot with straight people on cruises. I'm not a separatist by any means, or I'd at least book RSVP or Atlantis. But...

I don't go to LGBT meetings to "feel safe" on board. It's just that sometimes I prefer to be in queer spaces. And when a meeting is tagged "LGBT" and not merely "queer-friendly," I think that my preferences should override straight folks'. I know that in the kumbaya modern world - where we're soooo past things like gay politics, feminism, and the like - that makes no sense. After all, assimilation is the goal, right? (Though come to think of it, if orientation is Now Officially Irrelevant, what are you even doing on this Pleistocene board?)

And if your nieces went to a women's meeting (do young women even do that anymore? isn't feminism just terribly passe?) and I showed up and proclaimed that we post-moderns understand that gender is just a malleable construct, would that fly?

Interestingly enough when our local neighbours who joined us on a cruise came with us to the FOD gathering they excused themselves after the first drink and said they would catch up with us later. Thinking that they may have felt uncomfortable and decided to leave, I later asked them if there was problem in their attending. They laughingly responded to the contrary in that they felt that their presence may have been inhibiting the group's free flow of conversation and didn't think that was appropriate. Great friends and neighbours.

We are a gay couple from Calgary and completed a cruise with Disney in May 2014. It was a fantastic cruise! Disney is obviously heavy on families and children so we were curious whether we would find it a good fit but we love Disney and we imagine most people on the ship do as well. We didn't meet any GLBT folks but we saw a few other couples whom we think were gay. There didn't seem to be a "good" reason to introduce ourselves without it coming across as a little odd. I am the outgoing part of us and my partner always wonders why I need to talk to everyone and he would have not been amused.

At any rate we were open and frank about our relationship and lives and didn't experience any negative reaction from crew or other passengers or people who we met in the ports. I can't see a benefit to attending an LGBT/FOD group but I am open to other peoples' ideas and experiences.

I agree with everything Comboy said!

Allow me to also emphasize that you look at it as an opportunity to join in and say hello. Nothing more. Often something more arises, and you can make good friends that you may stay in touch with over the years and cruise again with. But not always.

Just as every cruise can have it's own personality, so can the FOD meetings... so roll with it.

In my experience, it is almost exclusively gay men, but I've been there with some lesbians and swingers. Include it in your schedule, stop by, order a drink... and if there isn't a vibe you enjoy, just say hello. But go more than once... sometimes it takes longer for some than others to warm up and be forthcoming with you. And when you see someone who interests you outside of the FOD mixer, say hello... if nothing else they may be a good choice to share a port excursion experience.

I don't mean to imply that it's all about hook-ups, or anything more than a social connection. But the advice is the same nevertheless.

Good luck... stay in a good mood and make friends with everyone... it will add to the cruise experience.