funny questions about cruising

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358 Posts
Joined Aug 2003
What are some of the funniest questions you've heard about cruising. Like.....What time is the two o'clock tour?.........Does the crew sleep on board the ship?..........Etc...
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by Snowy Owl
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Beautiful Southwest
8,073 Posts
Joined Aug 2005
My favorite one is the couple wandering around the photo shop saying " how do we tell which photos are ours?"
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Happiness is a moving floor
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34 Posts
Joined Nov 2005
Originally posted by snowy owl
What are some of the funniest questions you've heard about cruising. Like.....What time is the two o'clock tour?.........Does the crew sleep on board the ship?..........Etc...
Hello. My name is Irene and I've cruised the valor last january. Had a great time--the ship is large and beautiful. A funny question I heard was "does the ship have it's own power generator?" to which the cruise director answered, no, we stretch an extra long extension cord from miami to all the ports."
1,855 Posts
Joined Feb 2005
At dinner one of our table mates asked the people at the table what was their longest and shortest cruises.

I answered our shortest cruise was about 15 minutes. The time it took the ferry to cross the river.
359 Posts
Joined Jan 2002
Went on a group cruise with family and friends last year and most had never been on a cruise, their first time. A friend and her daughter went through the entire process of embarkation, followed the line onto the ship and stood there in awe and looked around. Friend said 'Where do we go from here? How do we get on the ship?'
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Bradenton, FL
988 Posts
Joined Dec 2004
Of course the classic questions..."Which elevators go to the front of the ship?" And..."What time is the midnight buffet?"
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1,153 Posts
Joined Apr 2004
What do you do with the beautiful ice carvings after they melt?

Is this island completely surrounded by water?

Are you sure that our oceanview cabin will be above the waterline of the ship?

Why don't inside cabins have a porthole/window?

Can I use American currency in Alaska?

I want to be on the port side of the ship! (We asked why.) That way I can always see the port! (For those that didn't get this, port is the nautical theme for the left side of the ship, and has nothing to do with which side faces town.)

Do you have to leave the ship to take a shore excursion?
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Townsend, WI
5,420 Posts
Joined Jan 2006
There's the ever popular, How high above sea level are we? Uh, what deck are you on?

Then there was the lady that called the desk to say she couldn't ge out of her cabin becase there was a do not disturb sign on the door.

Seems like every CD has the same jokes.

When we were on the Magica, I took to reading the signs. My favorite was on the back of the toilet that said Do Not Flush Whilst Seated. Don't you know somewhere along the way some schmuck actually tried it and broke his arm?
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Originally Posted by daiB

Your cruise is like life you get out of it what you put in, If you go around with a smile on your face and treat people as you would like to be treated with a please and thank you then there is every chance you will have the time of your life. On the other hand if you blow up at the first setback and treat people like dirt, then you will get what you deserve and have a lousy time.
95 Posts
Joined Jun 2006
And then there was the lady who asked her room steward if he had always done this type of work. The steward replied, "No, I used to be a deck hand on a submarine."
Morristown, NJ
596 Posts
Joined Oct 2005
Originally posted by snowy owl
What are some of the funniest questions you've heard about cruising. ......

If we arrive at the pier after the ship has sailed, will they still let us on?
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Norwegian Dawn Dec 9 2004
Norwegian Dawn Dec 10 2005
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Norwegian Spirit Jun 3 2006
Norwegian Spirit Sept 24 2006
60 Posts
Joined Jun 2006
Customer's have asked me ...

* How far (MILES) does the ship go when it's at sea ? :: AN ANSWER THE CAPTAIN KNOWS ::
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Carnival Glory: 9/16/06
2,198 Posts
Joined Mar 2005
We heard a women ask the Cruise Director. Is that sea water in the pool? CD: Yes it is. Women: Oh, that explains why there are so many waves.
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Charleston, WV
39 Posts
Joined Jul 2006
Not a cruise but my favorite was the person who asked our guide at Windsor castle, after hearing a number of jets fly over from nearby Heathrow, why the Queen built her castle so close to an airport.
90 Posts
Joined Jun 2006
I was on the Explorer of The Seas in December of 01. We were on RCCL's Private Island Labadee. We were some of the last ones to leave the island and we were just lounging in a couple of the hammocs when someone asked "so are you guys on the ship"... HMM No we live here!!!
Seminole, Florida
1,425 Posts
Joined Jan 2004
While on an outside deck, cruising the Florida Straits, a guy as me if the the
water was salt or fresh. I said the water on port side was salt, but on the starboard side was fresh. He thanked me and said he just won a bet he had with his wife.
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CCL Sensation 4/16/2000....CCL Fantasy....CCL Celebration....07/2002 CCL Destiny....11/17/01 RCCL Explorer OTS....6/7/03 (Fla.) & 9/21/03 (Cali) CCL Pride....3/16/04 Cunard QM2....5/23/04 CCL Victory....11/27/04 CCL Triumph....6/5/05 RCCL Brilliance OTS (Mediterranean)....11/20/05 CCL Liberty....12/11/05 Norwegian Jewel....5/8/06 & 9/8/06 Carnival Inspiration....9/16/06 Norwegian Sun-Alaska....1/19/07 NCL Pearl...2/25/07 Carnival Miracle....10/07/07 Royal Caribbean Mariner OTS....11/10/2007 NCL Sun...12/16/07 Caribbean Princess....3/30/08 Royal Caribbean Jewel OTS-Transatlantic....9/20/08 Carnival Glory....11/13/08 CCL Miracle....12/3/08 MSC Lirica....3/21/09 RCCL Grandeur OTS...5/30/09 CCL Glory....11/20/09 CCL Miracle....12/13/09 NCL Jewel....3/14/10 CCL Legend....6/05/10 CCL Freedom....8/19/10 CCL Inspiration....9/19/10 Emerald Princess....11/13/10 NCL Sun....11/20/10 NCL Sun....5/7/2011 NCL Epic Transatlantic....9/18/2011 CCL Splendor...11/28/11 Celebrity Solstice Transatlantic....1/01/12 Norwegian Star...10/26/12 Norwegian Dawn 16 days Quebec to Tampa....1/26/13 Carnival Dream Eastern Caribbean....9/13/2013 Carnival Legend England/Ireland/Scotland/France/Norway....11/09/13 Carnival Liberty....1/09/13 Carnival Legend....2/24/14 Norwegian Sky....4/6/14 Carnival Sunshine New Orleans to Pt. Canaveral....8/30/14 Carnival Legend Trans Pacific LA to Sydney23 days....11/28/14 Carnival Liberty (Milestone25)....3/27/2015 Carnival Valor (Diamond Cruise)....11/14/2015 Carnival Paradise.....4/10/16 Norwegian Star...6/19/2016 Norwegian Getaway....10/16/16 Royal Caribbean Allure OTS....12/11/16 Norwegian Jade....2/11/17 Norwegian Escape....5/15/17 RCCL Empress OTS....
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Long Island NY
2,726 Posts
Joined Aug 2004
I didn't actually hear this on a cruise ship, butI read it on these boards. After the earthquake in Hawaii, someone living there couldn't wait to leave & get back to the "good old USofA".
11,688 Posts
Joined Feb 2006
I worked at a very well known restaurant in Alaska and we had many cruise ship passengers stop by for lunch, the most common question from them was......Do you live here? I would smile and say "no i fly in everyday to serve lunch" it always would cause a laugh.
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