Young Widoww/ kids..1st cruise to West Car. over Xmas

[Fredr]

Hello,

 

An idea...bbjmlawson and the OP (Austin Texas) should go on an excursion together, to Tulum. Tulum dates back to Mayan times and it is a nice excursion which includes a ferry boat ride to Playa Del Carmen from Cozumel. You also get to see some of Mexico's Yucatan Pennisula. The kids can stay on the ship because Tulum really isn't for kids. They will have enough time to go off theship with you and see Cozumel. As I recall, the ship's excursion was not much more than private trips.

 

Both of you will have a great time and can look out for each other. And it will be a nice break from watching the kids.

[jpg1747]

The stingray encounter at Grand Cayman is highly recommended; there is also a turtle farm and dolphin swim.

 

Carnival has an excursion called The Amazing Cozumel Race - check to see if RCCL has something similar.

 

Another good thing to do is a trip to Tulum to visit the ruins.

 

I haven't been to MoBay, so I have no recommendations there.

 

I'd recommend going with the ship-sponsored excursions this time - it will be a lot less stressful.

 

Check out your roll call and the port boards for more information.

[forwardcabin]

Our kids (in their 40's) and our grandkids (age 13 to 18) absolutely loved the 1st cruise they were on last Dec. They loved it so much they begged us to do it again this Dec. The teens made friends from all over quickly--and they still text with those friends today. They loved the freedom of moving about the ship and not having to ask a parent. They espcecially loved staying up late eating pizza and ice cream while talking with friends. In port, we went to beaches where they freely played in the ocean. All in all, it was the most relaxing and fun time everyone in our family had while together in one place for 5 days. We can't seem to duplicate that on land under any circumstances. Here's hoping your cruise is just as great. Bon Voyage!

[gertz]

My warmest condolences to you. You can do this but it is tough but it is a goal to accomplish. Being blind is a big enough handicap but it doesn't seem to slow you down. And IMO time will never heal it allows the pain to be manageable and it is certainly a very real pain. But it will subside and then it might return years latter when you read a letter or post as yours and your hart just goes completely out to that person and the tears come back but you will feel a warm glow because one little thing you write or say might help.

 

I read "the extent of your grief will be governed by the investment in the relationship." That turned out to be one of the most truthful lines ever at least for me. It will give you understanding.

 

Enjoy that cruise and go with the flow is not a bad suggestion. Enjoy the kids and the other passengers, table for 8 and talk and talk and talk as talking will become a valued ally.

 

God bless and have a great Merry Christmas Cruise.:)

 

A P.S. if you will. In Cozumel try Poncho's Back Door for great Mexican food especially Tamales and Margarette's too. Short cab ride from pier very nice place.:D

[curlywurly]

I am only 45 and have 4 children. My dh died this summer and we are needing something new to do over Christmas. I've NEVER done something this big and planned a vacation. I feel like I've just jumped off a cliff.

 

I have no idea what to expect... I'm actually terrified .... I feel like I'm walking blindly into something, and in addition to me being blind, I'm taking my 4 kids along with me. My kids are 21, 17, 15, 11.

 

I'm taking a Western Caribbean Cruise on Royal Caribbean, Voyager out of Galveston. I just figured out that I need to book shore excursions, so I'm trying to do that...

 

This is NOT fun, this is difficult, and difficult to do this amonst grieving...

If anyone has some specific advice (do this, don't do this.... I would 100% take it) I stop in COzumel, from 7am - 4pm, to to George Town from 10 -6pm, Montego Bay from 9-6, and I'm spending Christmas Day back on the boat.

 

I'd appreciate ANY advice:confused:

 

 

My heart goes out to you and your children.

 

I know you have had messages of support from other women who have been in your situation, but my message is for your children from some one who has been where they are now.

I know it probably feels like the bottom has fallen out of their world and that it will never get better, but the old adage that time heals is suprisingly true. Don't get me wrong, after 32 years, I haven't forgotten and I still miss my dad desperately but I am happy. I have a fantastic family and a happy fulfilling life. Live life in a way that would make your dad proud, stay close to each other, laugh, cry and talk together (mum included) and you will find a way to a good life, different to that which you imagined with your dad still a part of it, but good and happy all the same.

You will all be in my thoughts.

[dustyroad]

stowels, i am so sorry for your loss and the pain of the death of your beloved husband. but '' it will get better in time ''. i am not trying to take away from your loss by saying that, but i lost my only child, my son who was 25 at the time of his death and who was also my bestfriend, 10 yrs ago. like you i was devasted and did not know what to do for a long period of time since i was divorced and on my own at the time. but the healing does start to take place at the pace you can handle it. i think it is wonderful that you are taking your children on a vacation, but dont over burden yourself with all the planning. just getting off the ship and doing fun inexpensive things on the beach and exploring the ports will be an adventure in itself. let them take charge of some of the planning and decide what fun things they would like to do. they will look back on the trip and see what a wonderful thing you did for them at a very hard time and they will know that they helped you by making some plans to make the cruise a success for all of you. take care of yourself, hug your kids and tell them you love them everyday. concentrate on '' just getting through one day at a time ''. just getting out of bed and putting on your clothes at this point is a huge accomplishment and you should be proud of yourself that you are doing that right now. keep us posted on how everything is going for your cruise and we are here for you. :) sharon

[Cruisin' Chick]

I'm so sorry for your loss. My husband just lost his mother last week after a year-long illness and I know he's thinking about wanting to get away soon even for a day trip (right now our daughter is sick, but even then has a play she's in so there's no getting out of town for at least a few weeks). It does help to have that change of scenery and maybe being away for the holidays will help your kids.

 

You have received some excellent tips above. I was thinking about advising you to consider not doing excursions in every port. We don't always plan something for each port and often that flexibility allows us to just relax (go to a beach or tour the attractions on our own). Just remember in those cases to bring the copy of the ship's newsletter for that day as it will list important info about when to be back onboard as you won't want to stress out over missing the ship.

 

Also consider going to Galveston the night before and staying in a hotel. Even though you are very close, that will be one less thing to stress out over.

[scotsgirl]

I don't have any suggestions or tips, but just wanted to express my condolonces and wish you all a very happy holiday.

[MicksMom]

So sorry for your loss, I can't even begin to imagine what you all are going through.

I think the cruise is a great idea! We have been to these ports twice (will be again a week after you) definitely check out the threads for each port. I may get slammed for this but do a lot of research for MoBay. A lot of the excursions involve a long ride to get to the excursion & some of the areas, I would not feel safe if it were just myself & kids. We are doing our first non ship sponsored excursion in January, going to Sunset Beach based on all of the wonderful reviews I have found on Cruise Critic.

 

We are just up the road from you in Fredericksburg. My family was hooked on cruising before we ever left the Port of Galveston. Definitely check out your roll call. We met a great family this past year & are planning on cruising together next year.

 

Happy Cruising!

[Guest TropicOne]

You all are great!!!

And you know what? I'm starting to look forward to this...

... just might be an adventure...

 

It will be an adventure and an excellent start on the next chapter of your life.

[Sailor2Cruiser]

Wow! I'm sure all the condolences in the world can't begin to quiet your heart. Yet it is great to see how the troops have rallied behind you. You have a lot of cheerleaders as well as kindred spirits (many young widows). My wish is that this time will help you and your children see life goes on even through the pain.

 

As you make your plans, step back and take a deep breath, I'm sure that is still difficult to do. But do involve the children, they are grieving also, and if you involve them in the decision making process they will feel this is not just "mom trying to move on" but a vacation for all of us.

 

Someone recommended the roll call threads. You might also look to see if RCCL has a community board (I found Carnival does) and join their roll call also. This opens more opportunities to meet more people.

 

I wish this vacation to be a sweet time for all of you.

[dustyroad]

You all are great!!!

And you know what? I'm starting to look forward to this...

... just might be an adventure...

 

i am so glad too read that you are feeling better about the cruise. the suggestion about the kids checking out the kids club right away is a very good tip. but dont be afraid to wander on the ship by yourself as posted. i travel as a '' solo female '' and have never had a problem on the ship being on my own. but i agree that the kids should stick together as much as possible for safety, companionship and the ease of your mind that they are ok. i hope the best for you and that you have a wonderful time together during this painful time.

[Fredr]

Hello,

 

Respectfully disagree that the four kids should "stick together" because this is not going to happen. Each is going meet others in their age group. I would though ask that they have dinner each nightwith you in the main dining room.

 

Our children were 11 and 6 when they went on their first cruise. We hardly saw the 11 year old,except for dinner. The six year old boy was the life of the party, and found things to do even though the ship did not have much for kids. Please take a laid back attitude toward bed times as this is not a time for rule enforcement.

 

A cruise is completely different...on one of our recent cruises, I saw a family of four...children were about 8 and 10 and parents in the Piano Bar about 11 PM having a wonderful time. And you will too....as in the commercial I'll Guarantee It!

[Kidsgoneletscruise]

A couple of years ago my mother in law passed away unexpectedly. My husband was very close with his mother and was having holidays without her; we booked a Christmas cruise. It was just what he needed. Being away not only eased his grief but also physically took him away from our already traditional holiday routines.

 

Good luck! :D

[dustyroad]

Hello,

 

Respectfully disagree that the four kids should "stick together" because this is not going to happen. Each is going meet others in their age group. I would though ask that they have dinner each nightwith you in the main dining room.

 

Our children were 11 and 6 when they went on their first cruise. We hardly saw the 11 year old,except for dinner. The six year old boy was the life of the party, and found things to do even though the ship did not have much for kids. Please take a laid back attitude toward bed times as this is not a time for rule enforcement.

 

A cruise is completely different...on one of our recent cruises, I saw a family of four...children were about 8 and 10 and parents in the Piano Bar about 11 PM having a wonderful time. And you will too....as in the commercial I'll Guarantee It!

 

you let your 11 yr old roam the ship all day without supervision :eek:. please tell me he was in the kids club.

[Caribbean Sunsets]

Stowels, my deepest condolences to you and your family. I was only 29 when my husband passed and my boys were only 1 and 2 years old. I think your idea of a cruise is a great way to be together and change the tradition. I found that changing the tradition made the holiday a little less difficult (for me anyways).

 

I wish you the best for the cruise and the future.

[u38575]

Stowels,

I think you are making a great decision to take your children on a Christmas Cruise. We always cruise over Christmas and it has become a tradition for my family. We were on the Voyager last Christmas out of

Galveston and had a wonderful time. The weather was great (a little bit chilly when you set sail and also the first night) but it was warming up as we got up the next day.

My children are 22 and 19. They are never bored or lonely on a cruise. There is so much for them to do. They will love it and love you for taking them. Watch out, they might want to do it every year!

We are fellow Texans (Fort Worth) so, if you have any questions about the port or anything else, just let me know and I can send you my email.

I am so sorry for your loss. I wish we were going on this cruise again this year so we could meet and have our children meet. We will be going on the Princess Sapphire out of LA this year to Mexico. We're hoping for nice weather.

Have a joyous holiday and God Bless you and your family

 

Jeannie

[Gail & Marty sailing away]

Have a great cruise

[u38575]

Forgot to mention-We always park at th EZCruise parking in Galveston. It is very convenient and easy to get to ship. My husband drops all of us off at the ship and then parks at this lot which is only a few blocks away-there is a shuttle but just as quick to walk back to the ship. You can get to your car quickly when you arrive back at the port and be out of Galvest on in no time at all. You can book online at EZCuiseparking.com. The cost is $50.00 for 7 night cruise if you book online ahead of time. If you plan to spend the night in Galveston the night before there are a number of hotels that will allow you to park your car for the week while you are away for free as long as you spend the night there before you depart. We always drive down from Fort Worth the day of the cruise. Plan to arrive at the port early to start your vacation. We are usually onboard by 1200 if possible. There will be plenty of food when you get onboard so don't eat lunch before arriving. ( we made this mistake on our first cruise)

 

Jeannie

[EliseinAustin]

I have gotten so many good suggestions. thank you, each one of you for taking your TIME to help a stranger.

My dh got the Swine Flu. He was healthy and had no underlying conditions. It's been a shock and I'm coping 1 day at a time...but now I have something to look forward to... and I'm not so terrified. :)

[TNTwiggy]

My prayers go out to you. You are a brave woman who is doing something so special for your children. I am sure your husband would be so proud of you. You might want to take something of your husband's with you....even something silly like a favorite shirt,etc. Then you can take that shirt and do pics in different locations and it will be like he is there with you. Of course, that depends on how strong everyone is right now....people grieve in different ways and take various amounts of time to start living again. If this would be too sad, it wouldn't work. Kids are so resiliant. A girl who goes to my daughter's school lost her 20 year old sister in October in a car accident. The girl was at the Friday night football game that same week. I think when kids are given 'permission' to laugh and have fun, they do. So, it is important for them to know that you expect them to have fun and laugh again...knowing that if they need quiet time, there is the room or other places on the ship. Maybe even an early morning walk to conncect with good memories of their dad...or even a time each evening to remember one funny thing that happened with their dad. You can keep it light and upbeat without trying to 'forget' what happened. I think you can combine the two and still have an amazing trip.

 

I wish you lots of luck and lots of smiles! You can do this!

[6rugrats]

I have gotten so many good suggestions. thank you, each one of you for taking your TIME to help a stranger.

My dh got the Swine Flu. He was healthy and had no underlying conditions. It's been a shock and I'm coping 1 day at a time...but now I have something to look forward to... and I'm not so terrified. :)

 

OP - I read your DH's obituary; what a very sad story and I now understand why you were so shocked. Seems as if it just came out of nowhere. I just got back from a trip to visit my mom who lives in Taylor, and it was my first visit to the area. I thought the people were some of the nicest, most helpful and polite people I'd been around for a long time. So you definately should not be surprised at strangers here helping you.

 

Have a wonderful trip.

[nseagirl]

OP - I read your DH's obituary; what a very sad story and I now understand why you were so shocked. Seems as if it just came out of nowhere. I just got back from a trip to visit my mom who lives in Taylor, and it was my first visit to the area. I thought the people were some of the nicest, most helpful and polite people I'd been around for a long time. So you definately should not be surprised at strangers here helping you.

 

Have a wonderful trip.

 

Just wondering where you read the obit?

[6rugrats]

Just wondering where you read the obit?

 

Online. Not too difficult to find with info provided by OP.

[Northshorecruisers]

I'm sorry to hear of your loss; however I applaud you for taking on the planning of this vacation. Holidays are very hard after someone's passing.

 

When we did the Western Caribbean, we used Peat Taylor in Ocho Rios, so I don't know who is available in Montego Bay. Grand Caymen we used NativeWay sports and loved them. A friend and I did the swim with the stingrays and then our husbands and kids joined us after for other tours with NativeWay. We did a beach day in Cozumel where we also arranged for the boys to go Parasailing. It was a great day and would be a fun way for your family to relax for the day.

 

Please come back and tell us about your trip when you get back. I hope you have a really wonderful time.