Young Widoww/ kids..1st cruise to West Car. over Xmas

[EliseinAustin]

I am only 45 and have 4 children. My dh died this summer and we are needing something new to do over Christmas. I've NEVER done something this big and planned a vacation. I feel like I've just jumped off a cliff.

 

I have no idea what to expect... I'm actually terrified .... I feel like I'm walking blindly into something, and in addition to me being blind, I'm taking my 4 kids along with me. My kids are 21, 17, 15, 11.

 

I'm taking a Western Caribbean Cruise on Royal Caribbean, Voyager out of Galveston. I just figured out that I need to book shore excursions, so I'm trying to do that...

 

This is NOT fun, this is difficult, and difficult to do this amonst grieving...

If anyone has some specific advice (do this, don't do this.... I would 100% take it) I stop in COzumel, from 7am - 4pm, to to George Town from 10 -6pm, Montego Bay from 9-6, and I'm spending Christmas Day back on the boat.

 

I'd appreciate ANY advice:confused:

[PattyG12]

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. It would have to be terrible with kids still at home. You guys can start a new holiday tradition now!!

 

Cozumel has so many beaches. The kids might like playing on the water toys while there. We did Mr. Sanchos but I believe that Paradise Beach had more toys to play with.

 

Grand Cayman ... check with Native Way water sports. They offer a very nice starfish/stingray trip for much cheaper than the cruise lines. The kids will LOVE feeding and walking amongst the sting rays. We had a blast there!!

 

MoBay ... We did Ocho Rios but the same company we used also covers Mo Bay ... We went with Marva Shaw at KnowJamaica dot com.

 

Also know that the doors are metal. you might want to take magnetic things for the kids to decorate their doors for Christmas. Please take a deep breath and enjoy the planning of this cruise. Of all the posts I've read, I believe you need this cruise more than anyone else!!

 

If you have questions, please post them. We're all here to help if we can.

[nseagirl]

One thing you might want to do is see if there's a roll call for your cruise. You can get to know some other cruisers and find out what excursions they're planning. Some of them will possibly be seasoned cruisers and can help alot.

 

Also, check out these boards for answers. You can look in the Ports of Call boards for advice too. If you have a question, ask.:)

 

You have enough stress in your life without adding to it. Try to relax and enjoy the process of the cruise. Let your kids help with the planning. They're hurting too and the planning might be helpful to them.

[CowPrincess]

stowels, I'm very sorry for your loss. (When I was widowed at 37, a dear friend said to me "I swear to you it will get better", and eventually it did. So I'm saying this to you: I swear it will get better.)

 

IMHO your kids are old enough to get involved in selecting the shore excursions that you'll be doing, and the planning will be a good chance for them to take a few tentative steps into re-engaging in "real life".

 

One thing you might also want to discuss (though it will be tearful) is a way of bringing your DH/their dad "into" Christmas/the vacation. And realize you and your kids are going to be feeling "frayed" and unhappy and exhausted for a long time yet. Give yourself AND them permission to be "off", unsocial, quiet, or to retreat from others as needed.

 

I think getting away over Christmas is a VERY good idea, and applaud you for having the courage to make the decision and move forward with it. I wish I could give you suggestions re shore excursions, but all I can suggest it that you check out the ports you'll be visiting on the "Ports of Call" board here on Cruise Critic.

 

I swear to you -- it will get better.

[CowPrincess]

Cozumel port of call board:

 

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/forumdisplay.php?s=&daysprune=&f=210

 

Jamaica port of call board:

 

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/forumdisplay.php?s=&daysprune=14&f=111

 

Grand Cayman:

 

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/forumdisplay.php?s=&daysprune=14&f=147

 

I just saw the GC board that this is one place you can visit stingrays -- OMG, I'd be doing THAT in a heartbeat :)

[printingchick]

The roll call suggestion is excellent. You'll already know some people before your cruise. It's a wonderful thing.

 

I have taken my kids on cruises in the western Caribbean more than once.

 

There are a TON of choices in Cozumel. And you're right, if you stick with ship excursions you may pay a little more, but it's simpler. Your older kids could choose to do their own thing and you wouldn't have to worry if they were with a group from the ship.

 

Grand Cayman is a small, fairly wealthy island. It's one of those "hide your money here" places, so it's crawling with banks! I've done the sting ray excursion twice, with different companies. It's a great experience. The beach is very nice. This is a very safe island where you can walk around easily without being pestered. No worries.

 

I have been to Ochos Rios Jamaica, but not Montego Bay. I would recommend sticking with an excursion in Jamaica as areas can get seedy. It is common for locals to try to sell you everything from local crafts to drugs - and be pushy about it. If you stick to the tourist areas and stay with a group, you'll be fine. You want to take SPECIAL care to keep a close eye on the kids at this stop. I visited here with an adult friend and we had NO problems at all. But I've heard the warnings so we were especially careful.

 

A ship is a great place for a family. Your kids are older so you can probably set meeting times throughout the day and offer - at least the older ones - some freedom to go do their own thing. If they're smart and don't go willy-nilly into some total stranger's cabin, they should be very safe in public areas. Lots of security, lots of hidden cameras, no way for them to get off the ship out in the middle of the ocean!

 

There will be other kids on the ship and kids manage to find each other. There are kids programs as well. My youngest, now 16, never wanted to do the kid programs but still managed to make friends by the pool. My older daughter, who cruised at age 17, enjoyed all the teen events and had a fabulous time. For a high-school kid, a cruise is like a non-stop (highly supervised) party!

 

I'm sorry for your loss. I think this family cruise will be a wonderful thing for you and your kids. ENJOY!

[yogi2929]

I cannot help you with the ports but-

have your three younger children check out the kid' clubs on the first night.

 

Check to see if there is a roll call for your sailing and join it.

[croozymooner]

I would just like to echo what another poster said about Grand Cayman and Native Way tours. I highly recommend them. We have done swimming with the stingrays twice--once through the ship, once through Native Way. Native Way were outstanding. There were only six of us on the boat and we had the utmost personal attention from the 2 or 3 tour guides. When you go out to the sandbar and see 30 people crammed on one boat, you'll appreciate the difference.

 

Cozumel is a lovely island that my husband and I go to annually in spring for a week at at time, so we know it very well. It is very safe and pleasant to walk around on your own around town. Taxis are everywhere and reasonably priced. Don't feel like you have to do a shore excursion here, although if one excites you, go for it.

 

Ochos Rios--I have only been here once, and we did a shore excursion through the ship. It was mountain biking though 90% of it was downhill and a truck followed behind to pick you up if you had problems. It was great fun! We rode through several small villages and saw a side of Jamaica that most people probably don't. This isn't a great port to do by yourself so I'd probably do a formal excursion here.

 

Please don't feel lost or terrified about all this. Cruising is actually an incredibly easy vacation in many ways because as long as you get on the ship, everything else is taken care of! Excursions are just icing on the cake. Is your 21 year old mature enough to help you out with the planning or picking excursions? I was 21 when I went on my first cruise with my husband (boyfriend at the time).

 

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how hard that must be.

[Fredr]

Hello,

 

First, you really are doing a great thing taking a cruise with your children.

 

Get them ready for the cruise. Tell them that it is a new adventure for you and that you do not have all the answers. Show them the ship's lay out and where your cabin is located. Show them a list of things that they can do on the ship.

 

Remember, you do not have to go on any ship excursions. They are nice but you can see a lot on your own, especially Cozumel and Grand Cayman.

 

Consider leaving them on the ship and you go on an excursion of interest to you...Tulum out of Cozumel is one idea. The kids can take very good care of themselves while you are off the ship. There are lots of staff onboard watching kids so don't worry.

 

Have one rule...that you wantdinnertogethereachnight. Otherwise back off a bit,especially about bed times. Participate in formal night but you have all the clothes you need in your closet so do not buy a lot.

 

Join the Roll Call for your cruise as these foks maybe of help to you.

Many have been on this ship/itinerary before and may have some ideas for you.

 

And...please calm down as a cruise is really like going to a nice hotel that moves. There is much more to it than this especially the beauty of the sea, sun and the stars. As the ship heads out to sea, please stand at the highest point on the ship and stand in the wind.

 

Do NOT hesitate to ask questions here. I forone have been on 30 cruises including visits to the ports where you are going and I am very familiar with RCCL though not the Voyager.

 

And I know why you are terrified...you can't make up your mind which swimming suit you are going to take...so take both!

[GORDONCHICK]

First, my condolences and sympathies to you and your family. Planning your first cruise can be a little mind-boggling, but you are under added stress and emotions. This is a fantastic place to ask what you may think are stupid questions, but most of us have either asked them here or hoped someone else would. You will find a wealth of info here as you wander around.

 

I would say the biggest and most helpful suggestion made here so far is for you to join your roll call. I think this is the right one for you: http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=813549 Explain your situation there, and I would be absolutely shocked if you didn't have many offers and suggestions there for excursion ideas and to help you understand what to expect. This group may have an official meet & mingle on board and it's fun to help put names and faces to our screennames. You might also find out if there will be other children on board the same ages as yours.

 

Keep in mind, you do not have to plan out the wazoo to have a great time. My first cruise was a 12 nighter, and we did not plan one single thing. We just went with the flow. You can just let things happen if that will help you take some of the stress off of yourself. Just keep asking questions, and we'll try to help best as we can!

 

Again, I'm so sorry for your loss.

[boulders]

I'm a young widow too. I took my first cruise a month after my husband passed away, leaving me with a baby, a 7 year old and a 10 year old. I've found cruises to be the best vacation to take as a widow. There is no worrying about how to get from place to place or where to eat - all that is taken care of. Also, no having to cook or do laundry, it will be waiting for you when you get home.

 

My recommendations:

 

DO request a large table during traditional dining. On the first cruise I took with my kids, we were seated with another widow and her son - how great is that? They do try to seat you with someone of similar demographics. It's also great just eating with other adults. ;)

 

DON'T stress about the shore excursions. You do not have to get off the ship at all. In fact, it's a great place to hang out when everyone else is gone. There will be shore excursions still available when you board the ship.

 

DO crosspack. Don't do one piece of luggage per person. Spread it around. On my first cruise, my luggage was lost and I had nothing for the entire cruise. Still had a great time though.

 

DON'T take a shore excursion by yourself. Widow brain set in for me on my Tulum excursion and I almost missed the bus back. Get your older kids to help you with organizational issues.

 

DO visit the solarium with a good book. It's nice and peaceful there.

 

DO take some time for yourself. Visit the spa. Have a foot massage/manicure - whatever strikes your fancy.

 

DO check out the Family Board under special interest cruising. That's where a lot of us Moms hang out. :cool:

 

DO remember to breathe! One at a time, in and out. You will have a great time.

[EliseinAustin]

I'm feeling like maybe I CAN DO THIS!:)

[6rugrats]

I am only 45 and have 4 children. My dh died this summer and we are needing something new to do over Christmas. I've NEVER done something this big and planned a vacation. I feel like I've just jumped off a cliff.

 

I have no idea what to expect... I'm actually terrified .... I feel like I'm walking blindly into something, and in addition to me being blind, I'm taking my 4 kids along with me. My kids are 21, 17, 15, 11.

 

I'm taking a Western Caribbean Cruise on Royal Caribbean, Voyager out of Galveston. I just figured out that I need to book shore excursions, so I'm trying to do that...

 

This is NOT fun, this is difficult, and difficult to do this amonst grieving...

If anyone has some specific advice (do this, don't do this.... I would 100% take it) I stop in COzumel, from 7am - 4pm, to to George Town from 10 -6pm, Montego Bay from 9-6, and I'm spending Christmas Day back on the boat.

 

I'd appreciate ANY advice:confused:

 

My condolences for your loss. You've received lots of advice, and I would add only one thing. You are taking minor children into Mexico. Please make sure, as painful as it is, that you bring your DH's death certificate. It is a requirement to obtain the other parent's permission to take a minor child to and from Mexico, and while you may not be asked, you absolutely need to have documentation if you are, that you are the only parent.

 

I am not sure it gets better, you just go on. My best to you and your family and hope this is a great trip for you.

[Fredr]

I'm feeling like maybe I CAN DO THIS!:)

 

YES, YOU CAN!

 

Going on a cruise is not on the following level:

 

Kicking a field goal for Texas with the game on the line against Oklahoma or even Texas A &M or,

 

Pitching to Alex Rodriquez any time, or

 

Drilling for oil in the Gulf during a rainstorm (this is the serious one)

 

Designing the scoreboard in Cowboys Stadium, with Jerry Jones looking over your shoulder

 

Giving a line dancing lesson to an elephant

 

And, just remember, that contributors to these boards are for the most part ordinary folks who purchase six packs at the neighborhood 7 -11. If they can plan and go on nice cruises yikes, sure you can.

[CowPrincess]

I'm feeling like maybe I CAN DO THIS!:)

 

Yes, you CAN do this! There are tons of helpful people on CC, and tons of info. You've gotten some great tips already, and if you need a cheering section we are here for you!

 

One other thing -- if you can, get to the port one day ahead of your "sail date". It really reduces stress and worry about whether or not you'll make the ship before it sails :)

 

Make sure each one of you takes 2 swimsuits -- so you can always have a dry one to put on.

[GORDONCHICK]

One other thing -- if you can, get to the port one day ahead of your "sail date". It really reduces stress and worry about whether or not you'll make the ship before it sails :)

 

 

I think Austin is 4-5 hours (200+ miles) away from Galveston, so she's not traveling too far. Though getting to the departure port city early is never a bad thing! :D :D :D

[CowPrincess]

I think Austin is 4-5 hours (200+ miles) away from Galveston, so she's not traveling too far. Though getting to the departure port city early is never a bad thing! :D :D :D

 

Thanks GORDONCHICK -- I didn't see the OP's location when I wrote that (and I thought I'd looked)!

[sjcruiser]

You and your family have my sincere sympathy in your loss.

 

You'll love all three locations. Many things to do, or just hang out at the beach.

 

Have fun and enjoy.

[EliseinAustin]

You all are great!!!

And you know what? I'm starting to look forward to this...

... just might be an adventure...

[RetireeWannabee]

It will be a terrific adventure! You all need some fun and will find it. You really don't have to do a lot of planning, and, in fact, I might discourage it. You don't need more stress, but I'm happy to see you getting more encouraged this evening. Really, I'm not much more intelligent than the drone in the next cube, and I've been able to do it. It only seems overwhelming, but, broken into chunks, it isn't.

 

Certainly check the ports of call to see what you and the kids will enjoy. But don't try to make this The Trip Of A Lifetime and work yourself into a frazzle. Really, just showing up will be sufficient. the rest can take care of itself.

 

Please don't bother with some of the stuff you find on these boards, like seeking out menus and activities lists and such - it's just not that important, are details you simply don't need until you are onboard.

 

I'm so sorry for your loss, but believe that this cruise will help you and your family in the healing process.

[bbjmlawson]

My kids are 21, 17, 15, 11. I'm taking a Western Caribbean Cruise on Royal Caribbean, Voyager out of Galveston.

 

I hope this will be a wonderful experience for your family. I am going on this same cruise! I will have my two kids with me (DS 14 & DD 11) and my nephews are traveling with us as well, both boys - 21 & 18. We will have close to the same age of kids on there.

 

I haven't decided what to do yet on the excursions either. I am really leaning toward the stingray in GC. I have heard so many great things about that and I think the kids would really enjoy it.

 

I am starting to check out our rollcall, so hopefully I will hear from you over there!

:)

[TravelingT]

First of all, I am sorry for your loss. I too am a young widow. I am 45 and my DH died 1 1/2 years ago. I have too children who are now 18 and 11.

 

I totally understand what you are going through. I took a panama canal cruise about four months after my husband died and it was a blessing. I was able to focus on something other than my pain and grieving. I took excursions through the ship just to make things easier and spent alot of time just resting on the deck or on my balcony and giving myself some healing time. I took a Disney cruise so the kids were very busy and had plenty to do.

 

Getting away during Christmas is a good idea I believe. It will not stop you from missing him during the holiday, but, I think a different locale will ease the pain a bit.

 

I hope that you can relax and start to heal a bit over this break, and feel free to pm me whenever you want with any questions or if you just want to vent.

 

Tammy

[printingchick]

I'm sure it can't hurt to be overly prepared, just in case, but I have taken minor children with me to Cozumel three times on cruise ships and have never been asked. Of course, my ex took our son to Cancun once and had problems. Maybe sexist, but they're not as likely to ask Mom as they are to ask a single man traveling with kids.

 

I think you'll be fine.

[peptobysmol]

You all are great!!!

And you know what? I'm starting to look forward to this...

... just might be an adventure...

 

To me cruising is the Best way to Vacate. I hope you and your family are doing well. Let the kids roam around in pairs on the ship. Its great fun exploring. You should never travel alone (imho) on the ship nor should your kids, unless your oldest is a male. I'd get the walkie-talkies for your group so you can stay in touch. They are small and you'll feel much better having them (again imho).

 

Boomer Sooner!

[Jade13]

First, sorry for your loss.

 

The reason I am posting is two fold.

 

First, don't feel you need to be off the ship for the entire time in port. I have been all over but took my daughter and her friend on a western Caribbean Cruise on Celebrity Century last year. They preferred the time on the ship, unlike me who is at the gangway when it opens.

 

Second, I can give advice regarding Grand Cayman. We did the Stingray snorkeling excursion. Everyone loved it. The teenagers were 16 and 17 at the time. Now, I am also one who 99% of the time arranges private tours as mentioned here, BUT, for this excursion we booked directly through Celebrity, who is owned by RCCL, so it may be the same tour operator. The excursion in 2008 was $45.00pp instead of $35.00pp if we went independent. Independent in this case meant the tour operator putting people together. We did one of these in Alaska and had to wait an hour for people on a NCL ship.

 

In any event, for the extra $10.00pp it was so much easier to pay Celebrity in advance and just do it through them on their earliest excursion, and again this is from someone who goes on private tours in Europe, Asia and South America. On this excursion we boarded a bus to take us to where we boarded a boat who took us to the stingrays. We needed extra cash to purchase the DVD with everyone playing with the stingrays, and they were brought back and picked up on our ship.