Clothing for kids in MDR

[aussielozzie18]

It took the OP, over an hour to pull the special needs card out from the the time of the original post. If the "asperger's illness" was such a factor in the nephew's life, it would have been brought up in original post. Sorry, but sometimes even parents of special needs kids need to be parents. You are unhappy with me because I pointed it out.

 

Example: This child goes on a dolphin swim where everyone is required to wear a life jacket. Simple rule? Not today, because the special need child refuses to wear a life jacket.

 

You are the tour operator, what do you do?

 

Next day the headlines read:

 

"Beachchick's Dolphin Swim does not allow Austic child to swim with the dolphins."

 

or tragically ....

 

"Child drowns at the "Beachchick's Dolphin Swim."

 

It is great that RCI has a program for autistic kids, however a cruise ship is a short term specialized society and it does have its own set of etiquette guideline and rules. On RCI there is a dress code. Quick review:

 

http://www.royalcaribbean.com/customersupport/faq/details.do?pagename=frequently_asked_questions&faqId=255&faqSubjectId=334

 

----------

Life Onboard

 

Q: What are the dress codes onboard?

 

A: There are three distinct types of evenings onboard: casual, smart casual and formal. Suggested guidelines for these nights are:

Casual: Sport shirts and slacks for men, sundresses or pants for women

Smart Casual: Jackets and ties for men, dresses or pantsuits for women

Formal: Suits and ties or tuxedos for men, cocktail dresses for women

 

The number of smart casual and formal nights is at the ship's discretion.

 

< cruise length info here >

 

We appreciate your usual parental guidance and cooperation in observing these easy guidelines with your children.

 

Please note ice skating on our Voyager, Freedom and Oasis Class ships requires that all skaters wear long pants and socks for their own comfort and safety.

 

-------

 

On my post I stated, that a polite society has rules, whether we choice to follow them is up to the individual. If the OP nephew's parents allow him to wear shorts to the MDR, let them not hope he does not want to go ice skating after dinner, where they will have have to determine their next course of action.

 

The key two words are: SUGGESTED GUIDELINES ie they are suggested not enforced.

 

To the OP, you did indeed open a can of worms. Hope you and your nephew have a wonderful cruise and enjoy dining in the MDR whether or not your nephew wears shorts.

[aussielozzie18]

To those on this thread who got on their high horse - A 12 year old CHILD who wears shorts into the MDR is not going to end cruising life as you know it. The MDR will be filled with hundreds of passengers dressed smartly. One CHILD in shorts will not lower the decorum or ruin the evening. He will be sitting down at a table and you will not even know he is wearing shorts. The quality of your evening in the MDR will be judged by the quality of the food, the quality of the service and the company of your fellow table guests.

 

To the OP, please ignore the offensive comments on this thread - the "special needs card" was particularly appalling - I hope you got the answer that you needed and I wish you and your nephew all the best.

Edited March 26, 2014 by aussielozzie18

[mickev99]

I'm glad to see that there have been a lot of helpful responses in this thread, but I think everything started off on the wrong foot when the OP left out an important detail about the nephew having Asperger's in the very first post.

 

It's important to include these types of details because most people would (and did) assume that this was one of those "teenager being a teenager with pushover parents" type of issue based on the original post. It's difficult for people to give solid advice when pertinent details are left out.

 

I did not mention that my nephew had Asperger's in the original thread because that had no bearing in the actual question that I asked. AGAIN, the original question that was asked was about whether or not he could wear shorts and the type of shorts. It was not "please give me advice on how to get my nephew to wear long pants". If that was what I was asking, then it would have been relevant to mention the special needs. The only reason that I brought it up later was because of all of the ridiculous comments from people who thought that I needed parenting advice.

 

Therefore, I did not leave out an "important detail", because that was NOT what I was asking.

 

It's wonderful that so many of you are perfect parents and have perfect children. Lucky you.

[mickev99]

It took the OP, over an hour to pull the special needs card out from the the time of the original post. If the "asperger's illness" was such a factor in the nephew's life, it would have been brought up in original post. Sorry, but sometimes even parents of special needs kids need to be parents. You are unhappy with me because I pointed it out.

 

Example: This child goes on a dolphin swim where everyone is required to wear a life jacket. Simple rule? Not today, because the special need child refuses to wear a life jacket.

 

You are the tour operator, what do you do?

 

Next day the headlines read:

 

"Beachchick's Dolphin Swim does not allow Austic child to swim with the dolphins."

 

or tragically ....

 

"Child drowns at the "Beachchick's Dolphin Swim."

 

It is great that RCI has a program for autistic kids, however a cruise ship is a short term specialized society and it does have its own set of etiquette guideline and rules. On RCI there is a dress code. Quick review:

 

http://www.royalcaribbean.com/customersupport/faq/details.do?pagename=frequently_asked_questions&faqId=255&faqSubjectId=334

 

----------

Life Onboard

 

Q: What are the dress codes onboard?

 

A: There are three distinct types of evenings onboard: casual, smart casual and formal. Suggested guidelines for these nights are:

Casual: Sport shirts and slacks for men, sundresses or pants for women

Smart Casual: Jackets and ties for men, dresses or pantsuits for women

Formal: Suits and ties or tuxedos for men, cocktail dresses for women

 

The number of smart casual and formal nights is at the ship's discretion.

 

< cruise length info here >

 

We appreciate your usual parental guidance and cooperation in observing these easy guidelines with your children.

 

Please note ice skating on our Voyager, Freedom and Oasis Class ships requires that all skaters wear long pants and socks for their own comfort and safety.

 

-------

 

On my post I stated, that a polite society has rules, whether we choice to follow them is up to the individual. If the OP nephew's parents allow him to wear shorts to the MDR, let them not hope he does not want to go ice skating after dinner, where they will have have to determine their next course of action.

 

Wow. Offensive to say the least. "special needs card"? Really?? And read my last comment....the fact that he has Asperger's had nothing to do with the original question. I wasn't asking for advice on how to get him to wear something else, I was asking if he was allowed to wear something, then I would take that information to his parents and let them decide what they wanted to do. And "it took the OP over and hour"? Well, sorry, but I have a job, 3 kids, and a life, so I'm not on these boards every 5 minutes. The only reason I brought it up was because the original question was misunderstood and people apparently thought that I wanted parenting advice when all I asked was a simple question.

[mickev99]

I do appreciate all of the constructive comments and information.

 

I apologize to those helpful people on here that this thread has so many rude and negative posters. I had no idea this is what would have come from it or else I would have never posted.

 

Wow, just wow.

 

Please do not comment again unless you have something helpful to say. Otherwise, you are just hurting people.

[matj2000]

I do appreciate all of the constructive comments and information.

 

I apologize to those helpful people on here that this thread has so many rude and negative posters. I had no idea this is what would have come from it or else I would have never posted.

 

Wow, just wow.

 

Please do not comment again unless you have something helpful to say. Otherwise, you are just hurting people.

 

I bet you didn't think the RC forums where filled with Psychologists, Family Therapists, Counselors, Behavior Therapists, Expert Parents, Etc.

Next time ask a question about bringing guests into the "Diamond Lounge".

You will see heads explode........

[cdscooby1]

Not only have I seen kids in shorts but adults as well in the MDR. Basically I feel it depends on when you are cruising. During a high vacation time, like spring break, I think they don't say anything to anyone. Last year on the Oasis my 12 year old twins looked cute in their tuxedos on formal night but I didn't see any other child in a tuxedo. Oh and that happened to be the night that a very large man sat next to us in the MDR in a very sloppy pair of shorts, sandals and a t-shirt. Don't stress have fun

Edited March 26, 2014 by cdscooby1

[racnug]

It took the OP, over an hour to pull the special needs card out from the the time of the original post. If the "asperger's illness" was such a factor in the nephew's life, it would have been brought up in original post. Sorry, but sometimes even parents of special needs kids need to be parents. You are unhappy with me because I pointed it out.

 

Example: This child goes on a dolphin swim where everyone is required to wear a life jacket. Simple rule? Not today, because the special need child refuses to wear a life jacket.

 

You are the tour operator, what do you do?

 

Next day the headlines read:

 

"Beachchick's Dolphin Swim does not allow Austic child to swim with the dolphins."

 

or tragically ....

 

"Child drowns at the "Beachchick's Dolphin Swim."

 

It is great that RCI has a program for autistic kids, however a cruise ship is a short term specialized society and it does have its own set of etiquette guideline and rules. On RCI there is a dress code. Quick review:

 

http://www.royalcaribbean.com/customersupport/faq/details.do?pagename=frequently_asked_questions&faqId=255&faqSubjectId=334

 

----------

Life Onboard

 

Q: What are the dress codes onboard?

 

A: There are three distinct types of evenings onboard: casual, smart casual and formal. Suggested guidelines for these nights are:

Casual: Sport shirts and slacks for men, sundresses or pants for women

Smart Casual: Jackets and ties for men, dresses or pantsuits for women

Formal: Suits and ties or tuxedos for men, cocktail dresses for women

 

The number of smart casual and formal nights is at the ship's discretion.

 

< cruise length info here >

 

We appreciate your usual parental guidance and cooperation in observing these easy guidelines with your children.

 

Please note ice skating on our Voyager, Freedom and Oasis Class ships requires that all skaters wear long pants and socks for their own comfort and safety.

 

-------

 

On my post I stated, that a polite society has rules, whether we choice to follow them is up to the individual. If the OP nephew's parents allow him to wear shorts to the MDR, let them not hope he does not want to go ice skating after dinner, where they will have have to determine their next course of action.

 

Last time I cruised, I don't remember wearing shorts in the MDR to be a safety issue.

When it comes to actual safety, we follow the rules or don't attempt. If an activity requires that a life vest, my daughter will wear one. If we chose ice skating, pants and socks will be worn. I would assume that most special needs families follow safety rules, there is a huge difference between safety and fashion.

 

However, dress code in a restaurant will not hurt anyone. You may call it "playing the Autism card", we call it making life easier for not only us, but everyone around us. Who do you want seated near you? Upset, screaming kid in pants, or calm, happy kid in shorts? Yes, we would take our daughter out of that situation, but obviously not quickly enough to please you.

 

Every moment of every day is difficult for us. Will it kill you to allow us some slack? Most people have no idea what it's like. We didn't know until six years ago, but even before we found out, we sure were way more accepting and understanding than some of you are. Sure hope we don't end up cruising with people like this.

 

And before the "don't bother doing things they can't handle" comes up again, we will not lay down and miss life or allow our special needs kids and their siblings to miss the adventure and excitement in life. Deal with it, and stop trying to make our lives more difficult than they already are.

 

OP sorry, had to get that out. Have an amazing cruise! In our experience,we saw no staff even caring what people wore to the MDR, although we usually just stick with Windjammer. Your family will not have an issue with shorts in the MDR!

[gerif]

I did not mention that my nephew had Asperger's in the original thread because that had no bearing in the actual question that I asked. AGAIN, the original question that was asked was about whether or not he could wear shorts and the type of shorts. It was not "please give me advice on how to get my nephew to wear long pants". If that was what I was asking, then it would have been relevant to mention the special needs. The only reason that I brought it up later was because of all of the ridiculous comments from people who thought that I needed parenting advice.

 

Therefore, I did not leave out an "important detail", because that was NOT what I was asking.

 

It's wonderful that so many of you are perfect parents and have perfect children. Lucky you.

 

You really DID leave out an important detail in your first post. I, too, felt as others that a child of that age needed to be told what was acceptable attire and that he was to dress accordingly, no ifs ands or buts. When you mentioned that he suffered from Aspergers, however, my mindset changed completely since I have a profoundly autistic grandson who is nonverbal and, quite frankly, probably doesn't even know who I am. He responds to his parents but not his older sister for instance.

 

So, in that case, I'd have advised letting him wear what he wants and let the headwaiter know in advance of his special needs. Totally different and, I believe, more helpful response. So, you see, what you left out really did matter.

[nana541]

59 posts that could have been dealt with in 3!!! The OP wasted a lot of time by the failure to mention that her Nephew was a special needs child.

This bit of "crucial" info made ALL the difference to the proper answering of her concerns.

 

Generally any young person in the MDR would be expected to dress appropriately or the parents would be expected to assist them in dressing for the occasion.

 

There are of course exceptions but the OP never bothered to share the full story and IMO wasted a lot of time.

 

Your questions might be better answered on the "special needs" board where cruisers with experience in cruising with similar issues can answer your questions based on their families experience.

 

I hope your family has a great time, I think you will find your nephew welcome anywhere.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums mobile app

[reallyitsmema]

Here is a link to the cruise lines website. Have them contact the special needs department if they need priority embarkation or anything else that will make his cruise easier. Arrangements can also be made for the muster drill since that can be very overwhelming.

 

http://www.royalcaribbean.com/findacruise/experiencetypes/product.do?pagename=onboard_prod_autism_friendly_ships

[mickev99]

You really DID leave out an important detail in your first post. I, too, felt as others that a child of that age needed to be told what was acceptable attire and that he was to dress accordingly, no ifs ands or buts. When you mentioned that he suffered from Aspergers, however, my mindset changed completely since I have a profoundly autistic grandson who is nonverbal and, quite frankly, probably doesn't even know who I am. He responds to his parents but not his older sister for instance.

 

So, in that case, I'd have advised letting him wear what he wants and let the headwaiter know in advance of his special needs. Totally different and, I believe, more helpful response. So, you see, what you left out really did matter.

 

AGAIN, I was NOT asking for PARENTING ADVICE. I was asking what kids were ALLOWED TO WEAR. It didn't matter whether or not the child had any kind of special needs for that specific question. If I had wanted advice on how to make his shorts work or how to get him to wear pants because he has Asperger's, then that would have been a completely different post, and, yes, Asperger's would have been mentioned (although I am glad that it did come up because I do appreciate the helpful suggestions of different types of clothing from people that have experienced this situation, and the Autism at Seas, and talking to the MDR staff, etc). I did not ask for your (or anyone else's) opinion on whether I should enforce a rule, when in fact I was asking what the RULE IS, because as someone else posted above, RCL's website lists a suggestion, not really a rule. I wanted to know if he would be allowed into the MDR in shorts. That's all. It was that simple of a question that got completely got blown out of proportion because people decided to read more into it (even suggesting that I make him wear pants when I am not the parent and do not make the rules for him) and not answer the specific question that was asked.

 

The only reason that I brought up Asperger's is to try to stop the parenting advice, because that's not what I was asking for.

[babyher]

To the people that are so put out by others who "Play the special need card"

 

I have a little something I do that at times like this. Might find it helpful

 

 

I gladly let the folks with the special needs member go ahead of me. And then Thank God , that myself , and my family are all healthy and able bodied and are able to wait a few extra minutes.

 

I guess some people feel who can be the most intolerant so and so on the planet , just as long as you are dressed pretty.

[mickev99]

Here is a link to the cruise lines website. Have them contact the special needs department if they need priority embarkation or anything else that will make his cruise easier. Arrangements can also be made for the muster drill since that can be very overwhelming.

 

http://www.royalcaribbean.com/findacruise/experiencetypes/product.do?pagename=onboard_prod_autism_friendly_ships

 

Thanks!

[nana541]

There is a wonderful thread that covers many many issues regarding cruising with an Autistic child if you go the the Disabled Travel board.

These are first person accounts (and many on RCCL ships) about accommodations and important info that will rest your mind and this boys parents.

I tried to copy a link but don't know how.

 

Look for:

http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showpost.php?p=39663508

Autistic child and the muster drill, it covers so many situations from other families on board ship. Maybe this link will work!

Good luck

 

PS I too have a family member with Aspergers, so I also get it,but each of these kids have there own special issues.... A day at a time is all you can do.

Sent from my iPhone using Forums mobile app

Edited March 26, 2014 by nana541

[deedeetoo]

AGAIN, I was NOT asking for PARENTING ADVICE. I was asking what kids were ALLOWED TO WEAR. It didn't matter whether or not the child had any kind of special needs for that specific question. If I had wanted advice on how to make his shorts work or how to get him to wear pants because he has Asperger's, then that would have been a completely different post, and, yes, Asperger's would have been mentioned (although I am glad that it did come up because I do appreciate the helpful suggestions of different types of clothing from people that have experienced this situation, and the Autism at Seas, and talking to the MDR staff, etc). I did not ask for your (or anyone else's) opinion on whether I should enforce a rule, when in fact I was asking what the RULE IS, because as someone else posted above, RCL's website lists a suggestion, not really a rule. I wanted to know if he would be allowed into the MDR in shorts. That's all. It was that simple of a question that got completely got blown out of proportion because people decided to read more into it (even suggesting that I make him wear pants when I am not the parent and do not make the rules for him) and not answer the specific question that was asked.

 

The only reason that I brought up Asperger's is to try to stop the parenting advice, because that's not what I was asking for.

 

OP, I agree with you 100%. The fact that he had Asperger's is not relevant to your question. But, there are so many here that are so used to giving unsolicited parenting advice that they can't even understand that you weren't asking for that. You have to learn to just ignore them and not let them get under your skin.

Edited March 26, 2014 by deedeetoo

[galavant3]

AGAIN, I was NOT asking for PARENTING ADVICE. I was asking what kids were ALLOWED TO WEAR.

 

RCCL's policy is that shorts are not permitted in the dining room in the evening. Children are expected to adhere to the same guidelines.

[deedeetoo]

RCCL's policy is that shorts are not permitted in the dining room in the evening. Children are expected to adhere to the same guidelines.

 

And as many have reported this policy is not enforced, especially with respect to children, so in practice wearing shorts is allowed.

[galavant3]

And as many have reported this policy is not enforced, especially with respect to children, so in practice wearing shorts is allowed.

 

I guess it is a matter of semantics. The policy is that shorts are not permitted but it would appear that it is not uniformly enforced. To me, that doesn't make it "allowed". To be on the safe side, I would bring at least one pair of pants, just in case.

 

I am reminded of the post where someone was not allowed to bring soda aboard. It is best to understand the rules and be prepared...just in case, this time, they are enforced. That way, there are no surprises.

Edited March 26, 2014 by galavant3

[mickev99]

59 posts that could have been dealt with in 3!!! The OP wasted a lot of time by the failure to mention that her Nephew was a special needs child.

This bit of "crucial" info made ALL the difference to the proper answering of her concerns.

 

Generally any young person in the MDR would be expected to dress appropriately or the parents would be expected to assist them in dressing for the occasion.

 

There are of course exceptions but the OP never bothered to share the full story and IMO wasted a lot of time.

 

Your questions might be better answered on the "special needs" board where cruisers with experience in cruising with similar issues can answer your questions based on their families experience.

 

I hope your family has a great time, I think you will find your nephew welcome anywhere.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums mobile app

 

OMG, do some of you people not know how to read? The question that I asked had nothing, I repeat NOTHING, to do with special needs. I just wanted to know if it was allowed or if he would not be allowed inside the MDR in shorts. THAT'S ALL! Then I was going to let my brother know that either they can't eat in the MDR with us if he was going to wear shorts or not, and it would be his decision to pursue the issue. That's all I was asking for, but apparently a lot of people who responded in the beginning have no reading comprehension and decided to answer a question that was never asked. I never "failed to mention it" because it was never a "critical" issue to begin with. It only became an issue when people decided to give advice that was not asked of them.

[nana541]

Sorry I wasted my time. To the OP you have been provided with some good information, I suggest you decide for yourself what to do with it!

Good day

Edited March 26, 2014 by nana541

[mickev99]

OP, I agree with you 100%. The fact that he had Asperger's is not relevant to your question. But, there are so many here that are so used to giving unsolicited parenting advice that they can't even understand that you weren't asking for that. You have to learn to just ignore them and not let them get under your skin.

 

You are correct. I really just need to unsubscribe from this thread because it is, unfortunately, getting under my skin!! Thanks!

[BeachChik]

It took the OP, over an hour to pull the special needs card out from the the time of the original post. If the "asperger's illness" was such a factor in the nephew's life, it would have been brought up in original post. Sorry, but sometimes even parents of special needs kids need to be parents. You are unhappy with me because I pointed it out.

 

Example: This child goes on a dolphin swim where everyone is required to wear a life jacket. Simple rule? Not today, because the special need child refuses to wear a life jacket.

 

You are the tour operator, what do you do?

 

Next day the headlines read:

 

"Beachchick's Dolphin Swim does not allow Austic child to swim with the dolphins."

 

or tragically ....

 

"Child drowns at the "Beachchick's Dolphin Swim."

 

It is great that RCI has a program for autistic kids, however a cruise ship is a short term specialized society and it does have its own set of etiquette guideline and rules. On RCI there is a dress code. Quick review:

 

http://www.royalcaribbean.com/customersupport/faq/details.do?pagename=frequently_asked_questions&faqId=255&faqSubjectId=334

 

----------

Life Onboard

 

Q: What are the dress codes onboard?

 

A: There are three distinct types of evenings onboard: casual, smart casual and formal. Suggested guidelines for these nights are:

Casual: Sport shirts and slacks for men, sundresses or pants for women

Smart Casual: Jackets and ties for men, dresses or pantsuits for women

Formal: Suits and ties or tuxedos for men, cocktail dresses for women

 

The number of smart casual and formal nights is at the ship's discretion.

 

< cruise length info here >

 

We appreciate your usual parental guidance and cooperation in observing these easy guidelines with your children.

 

Please note ice skating on our Voyager, Freedom and Oasis Class ships requires that all skaters wear long pants and socks for their own comfort and safety.

 

-------

 

On my post I stated, that a polite society has rules, whether we choice to follow them is up to the individual. If the OP nephew's parents allow him to wear shorts to the MDR, let them not hope he does not want to go ice skating after dinner, where they will have have to determine their next course of action.

 

Your example is pointless because they are not even close to a similar situation. If a child needs to wear shorts in the mdr because of sensory issues they are not in danger if anything. So comparing it to an excursion where drowning is possible is asinine.

 

It amazes me that people get so outraged over a dress code. It is so petty. If I spent all my time worrying about what random strangers were doing what a sad life that would be. How about enjoy your vacation and learn to ignore people that aren't in your group.

[BeachChik]

I do appreciate all of the constructive comments and information.

 

I apologize to those helpful people on here that this thread has so many rude and negative posters. I had no idea this is what would have come from it or else I would have never posted.

 

Wow, just wow.

 

Please do not comment again unless you have something helpful to say. Otherwise, you are just hurting people.

 

I would just ignore the nasty people. I believe they have a sad unhappy life and that's why they feel the need to be so judgmental to people they don't even know.

[tanzer22pilot]

Your example is pointless because they are not even close to a similar situation. If a child needs to wear shorts in the mdr because of sensory issues they are not in danger if anything. So comparing it to an excursion where drowning is possible is asinine.

 

It amazes me that people get so outraged over a dress code. It is so petty. If I spent all my time worrying about what random strangers were doing what a sad life that would be. How about enjoy your vacation and learn to ignore people that aren't in your group.

 

Yes or no option only.

 

Do you allow the child to swim without a life vest with the dolphins?