bigger passenger

[Smart 4-2]

Fireunner.
I am glad you are finding this thread informative.
The responses you are objecting to were, I felt, quite restrained responses to an insensitive cruel poster who verbally attacked people of size.
The moderators were right in removing them. I was glad to see the thread back to its original focus. Sorry if you were upset by some of our posts.
This thread has been a friendly place, a safe haven where we may discuss challenges with others who understand. I don't find your post objectionable, and many of us sympathize and share the struggle of dealing with permanent disabilities.
Best wishes, and enjoy cruising.

[lhanson38]

[quote name='Smart 4-2']Being overweight can be partly metabolic / reaction to meds and partly learned behavior. Eating styles, reaction to stress, physical problems that hinder getting enough exercise...
I am more worried about learned behavior that makes one intolerant and very uncompassionate towards fellow human beings.
This thread is supposed to be about sharing cruise tips for dealing with disabilities - in a positive way, if possible.
Please "play nice", and to quote a phrase I learned from CC
"Well, bless your heart"[/quote]

I can tell your not from the south..Bless your heart is not a nice thing..Really

[lovebunnyok]

[quote name='firerunner']Hopefully my reply doesnt get removed for i might upset some people.

first off I am overweight, 50 more pounds to go towards my goal AND I am disabled. Wheelchair bound alot of the time depending on the illness.

So here goes..someone posted something like "i can lose weight but they cant stop being them."

and you know I think as overweight people we need to ALSO understand those that are not. As in that comment even peed me off.

Why you ask??? I am disabled and even when I take off the last 50 pounds I WILL STILL BE DISABLED. there is no cure for me, there is no OA, there is not gastric surgery or lap band.

If I could be cured by losing the weight I would be pounding down the gym rooms door every day, to exercise, I would be getting surgery if need be, I would be monitoring every bite of food i put into my mouths..so that i wasn't disabled.

so that i could walk

so that i could sit at the beach with my kids

so that i could live longer


I don't have that choice

and I think THAT is why abled bodies do not understand were the obese people and their belief, come from, hell I am over weight and I don't understand how an overweight person can be classified as disabled. In alot of cases there is a CURE! and i think comments like the above, about being able to lose weight, just feeds into the ignorance of those that don't even try to understand it. All they see is that this obese person just stated that they can lose weight..so why don't they?

Now that being said, before you go getting all mad, I'm not saying you're wrong, or you should not be classifed as disabled or you should not have a room.

im saying to try to understand the view of others, and watch what we say. We do not need to rub it in their faces that we can just lose weight or get lap band to become mobile.

And finally, although I am not morbidly obese (any more I have lost 42 pounds to date), but i am and always will be disabled due to this disease. And this thread has opened my eyes alot to the trials and hassels an over weight person goes through. It is a good thread.

But I do think not only do others need to show tolerance and understanding..so do we.[/quote]

While I understand your viewpoint, I have to respectfully disagree. I too am disabled beyond being morbidly obese. I am losing my eyesight, and at age 34, have cataracts in both eyes and no doctor will perform the surgery because of family history and risks because my eyes are too fragile.

I don't have tolerance for those who berate me for my weight, and attack those who are fluffy because they don't like how we look. Society these days have made it even worse. Fat people are constantly mocked and made fun of just because of size. Whether it's because of genetics, metabolic issues, or psychological issues doesn't matter. We are all lumped into one group, and demonized for it.

I am trying to get WLS, but for me it is a last resort. With my endocrinology issues, there is no guarantee that it will work. In fact, there is no guarantee it will work for any obese person, but because we are desperate to fit into society's image and to be healthier people, we are willing to physically alter our digestive system. [B]People have died from this surgery[/B], and some lose so much weight they can't stay at a healthy weight. Not only that, but this surgery purposely makes it to where we cannot get the proper nutrients from the food we eat, making us susceptible to a number of health issues and disorders.

So, no, I will never have tolerance or understanding for those who think we are just fat slobs and that we choose to be fat. I did not choose this, and I don't see how any rational human being can choose to be mocked and harassed, and made a laughing stock because our bodies are larger than others.

On a happy note, 91 days till I cruise for the first time!! :) I am super excited! I even am fulfilling a dream by swimming with dolphins!! :)

[sweetlissa]

[quote name='lovebunnyok'].

I am trying to get WLS, but for me it is a last resort. With my endocrinology issues, there is no guarantee that it will work. In fact, there is no guarantee it will work for any obese person, but because we are desperate to fit into society's image and to be healthier people, we are willing to physically alter our digestive system. [B]People have died from this surgery[/B], and some lose so much weight they can't stay at a healthy weight. Not only that, but this surgery purposely makes it to where we cannot get the proper nutrients from the food we eat, making us susceptible to a number of health issues and disorders.



On a happy note, 91 days till I cruise for the first time!! :) I am super excited! I even am fulfilling a dream by swimming with dolphins!! :)[/quote]

So excited for you Lov!! Did I see you were going on the bloggers cruise as well??

WLS surgery is a big decision and I don't think people realize how hard it is to qualify for it. I know it took be almost a year and I'm scared to freakin death. But I do want to be healthier, mainly b/c i'm greedy and want a long life, so I'm gonna do it.

[lovebunnyok]

[quote name='sweetsublissa']So excited for you Lov!! Did I see you were going on the bloggers cruise as well??

WLS surgery is a big decision and I don't think people realize how hard it is to qualify for it. I know it took be almost a year and I'm scared to freakin death. But I do want to be healthier, mainly b/c i'm greedy and want a long life, so I'm gonna do it.[/quote]

The bloggers cruise? I have no idea! LOL Hubby and I are going on the Carnival Elation Dec 17th out of NOLA.

I understand your fears, but like you, I need to do it. I tried to qualify once before in 2004, but they denied me. Why, I have no idea. It's not like I was a supermodel or anything. I was probably 20lbs less than I am now. But hopefully, now that I have actually been declared disabled due to weight, they will agree that I actually need it! LOL

Oh, I got my seminar moved up! I will be going tomorrow morning. :)

Has your doctor required to do a pre op diet? I was just curious since the surgery is right after your cruise.

[MissRabbit]

[quote name='lovebunnyok']On April 27, 2011, Tuscaloosa, Alabama was hit by an F4 tornado that was over a mile long in width. My husband and I were in our apartment and had no idea (mainly because weather technology here sucks) that it was heading right for us. We got into the bathroom in time, but not enough time to save our pets. Our bathroom was the only room left standing in a 2 story apartment building. We lost everything that day, but were lucky to have renters insurance that helped us to replace the material possessions and give us our first cruise in December. My avatar is a hounds-tooth ribbon that symbolizes the unity this town has had since that day, and the strength we have to rebuild. :)[/quote]

Sorry about the loss of your pets and belongings. Thank goodness you made it through that ordeal in relative safety.

[Smart 4-2]

lhanson 38 posted:
"I can tell your not from the south..Bless your heart is not a nice thing..Really"

Sorry, I did not mean to offend anyone. Thanks for letting me know.
Yes, I am not from the South, and do not grasp the nuances convayed by that phrase. I did think it was less positive than "have a nice day".
I will ask some friendly fellow cruisers to translate the phrase on a relaxing sea day - no need to elaborate here.

to lovebunnyok:
What a terrible experience!
I'm glad you and your husband are recovered and looking forward to cruising. Edited September 16, 2011 by Smart 4-2
add a note

[MissRabbit]

[quote name='firerunner']

So here goes..someone posted something like "i can lose weight but they cant stop being them."

and you know I think as overweight people we need to ALSO understand those that are not. As in that comment even peed me off.

.......But I do think not only do others need to show tolerance and understanding..so do we.[/quote]

Comments like the one that bothered you are reflex reactions. It's a way of taking away the power from the person who is hurting us. Like bunny said, this person, whose posts have mercifully been removed, was berating us and attacking us just for the way we look. They don't know us. They have no clue what kind of people we are inside, they just see an offensive outer shell and hate us for it. So to say something like "i can lose weight but you can't stop being you" is just a reaction and way to make it hurt less. It's not said as a tease or slight towards others with other disabilities that *can't* change who they are.

In fact, in a lot of cases, that statement isn't really true at all. I can't lose weight. I'm trying as hard as i can. I'm eating good healthy foods, i'm watching what i eat and my caloric intake. I'm diabetic but my blood sugars have been in control for a year and a half. I go to Aquafit and swim length an hour and a half, 3x a week. Based on my caloric intake vs what i burn, i should be losing nearly 3 lbs a week. Instead, i just bounce up a lb down a lb. up 2 down 3. up 5 down 6. over and over and over again.

So when someone comes along like that person who has made it clear she universally hates all fat people and took a particular interest in targetting me (in another thread that got pulled), i cannot find the strength to be considerate of her feelings. Yours, i can, because i can see your intention is good and for that, I thank you. I hope that helps to explain a little from where i'm coming from.

I hope we can put all this to bed and start fresh. It's just not worth the emotional stress to keep discussing it.

Any takers on my MDR chair question?

bunny... when's your next cruise?

[sweetlissa]

[quote name='lovebunnyok']The bloggers cruise? I have no idea! LOL Hubby and I are going on the Carnival Elation Dec 17th out of NOLA.

I understand your fears, but like you, I need to do it. I tried to qualify once before in 2004, but they denied me. Why, I have no idea. It's not like I was a supermodel or anything. I was probably 20lbs less than I am now. But hopefully, now that I have actually been declared disabled due to weight, they will agree that I actually need it! LOL

Oh, I got my seminar moved up! I will be going tomorrow morning. :)

Has your doctor required to do a pre op diet? I was just curious since the surgery is right after your cruise.[/quote]

My diet has changed so much in the past 18 mos, that it's insane. since June though, i've been on a 600 calorie, high protein diet, not from my doc, just me getting prepared for what comes after the surgery :-) Have fun at the seminar

[sweetlissa]

sorry Rabbit, I've never asked but i hope to never be in the bench seat thingy again.

[Marian Paroo]

[quote name='sweetsublissa']My diet has changed so much in the past 18 mos, that it's insane. since June though, i've been on a 600 calorie, high protein diet, not from my doc, just me getting prepared for what comes after the surgery :-) Have fun at the seminar[/QUOTE]

[COLOR="DarkOrchid"]Please be careful.

that is way below starvation level.[/COLOR]

[sweetlissa]

[quote name='Marian Paroo'][COLOR=darkorchid]Please be careful.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=darkorchid]that is way below starvation level.[/COLOR][/quote]

Thank you I will :-) and my doctor is monitoring me very closely. That's part of why they think this surgery will be the solution. Although I eat about 6 times a day, it's very little and I should be losing weight and I am, just very very slowly and after my heart attacks, they want the weight off now.

[cello56]

[quote name='sweetsublissa']Thank you I will :-) and my doctor is monitoring me very closely. That's part of why they think this surgery will be the solution. Although I eat about 6 times a day, it's very little and I should be losing weight and I am, just very very slowly and after my heart attacks, they want the weight off now.[/QUOTE]

As a former Weight Watchers leader for seven years, please let me also caution you regarding a 600 calorie a day diet. This would be an dangerously low calorie level for anyone, but must be especially low for a person of size. Perhaps your physician needs to refer you to a registered dietitian prior to your surgery?

[sweetlissa]

[quote name='cello56']As a former Weight Watchers leader for seven years, please let me also caution you regarding a 600 calorie a day diet. This would be an dangerously low calorie level for anyone, but must be especially low for a person of size. Perhaps your physician needs to refer you to a registered dietitian prior to your surgery?[/quote]

I do see a dietitician once a week to turn in my food logs, discuss my diet, and such. She would like to see me at about 800-1000 calories a day but she's coping with the 600 pretty good. I do eat alot believe it or not, I'm just very careful about what that "alot" is. I try to do alot of negative calories as well as alot of foods that have very few.

Thanks everyone for your concern!

[6rugrats]

[quote name='lovebunnyok'] Some of us have little to no metabolism and a lifetime of dieting has made us unable to lose weight. [/QUOTE]
I don't understand this. If you had "no metabolism" you would be dead.

[quote name='sweetsublissa']I do see a dietitician once a week to turn in my food logs, discuss my diet, and such. I do eat alot believe it or not, I'm just very careful about what that "alot" is. I try to do alot of negative calories as well as alot of foods that have very few.

[/QUOTE]
Negative calorie foods? There is no scientific evidence that this is true. Also, your body needs at least 1,200 calories a day to survive, without having potential damage to your organs. Such a low caloric intake can backfire on you, as it can cause excessive muscle breakdown and metabolic adaptions that can drive down your calorie requirements. When you starve your body, it will hoard the fat, and use muscle mass and organ tissue for energy.

[redhotmermaid]

[quote name='Bearcat1946']Well, I just got off the 29 August-5 September Emerald Princess Western Caribbean cruise and it happened again. I requested a 2-person table, close to the entrance. They gave me a 2-person, all the way up against the far wall. I went to see the maitre 'd before the first meal and they moved me completely out of the original dining room and moved me down one deck to[SIZE=4] Michelangelo. When I went to the Tuxedo people, I was informed they had nothing to fit me. I explained this to the maitre 'd and he told me in no-uncertain-terms that there would be no exceptions to the formal nights and I could just go to the Horizon or Caribe or the hot dog place. I was informed that the formal nights were for the benefit of the Europeans who enjoy the formal activities, and they do not wish to be around others who are not dressed appropriately. It's not like I didn't try to get a tux.

BTW, I called room service and got a very nice club sandwich and a chefs salad. Just for sh*ts and giggles, I also ordered a hot dog, sat there with my Beck's beer and watched baseball on ESPN.

Freaking amazing.
[/SIZE][/quote]
Dear bear...the mens warehouse got my hubby a tux size 70 hes a 68 in pants for 80 for the whole cruise with two shirts and two vests....he looked good. And he could buy it perm. for a decent price. Edited September 18, 2011 by redhotmermaid

[MissRabbit]

lookin snazzy!

[lovebunnyok]

Hey everyone! :)

I went to the WLS seminar today. It was informative and I already have my first appt with the surgeon on Oct 7th. My hubby was worried of the financial costs, but with the insurance it looks like it will be minimal. :) So, I figure if all goes well with the pre op testing, I will be getting it at the beginning of the year! Wish me luck! ;)

[sweetlissa]

[quote name='firerunner']So here goes..someone posted something like "i can lose weight but they cant stop being them."

and you know I think as overweight people we need to ALSO understand those that are not. As in that comment even peed me off.

[/quote]

My intent wasn't to pee anyone off, all of us deal with our various issues in various ways, and that is mine.

[sweetlissa]

I've had to request wheelchair assistance for embarktation and disembartation. I will be wearing my brace but still not sure how long I will be able to stand, so my PVP suggested that. Has anyone had to do this before and how will it affect embarking and disembarking?

Thanks in advance
Lissa

[arhillbilly]

I've had to request wheelchair assistance for embarktation and disembartation. I will be wearing my brace but still not sure how long I will be able to stand, so my PVP suggested that. Has anyone had to do this before and how will it affect embarking and disembarking?

 

Thanks in advance

Lissa

 

I just did this on Aug 28 in New Orleans. I had just had a pace maker put in 18 days before the cruise. The TA suggested this and I agreed based on the last 3 cruises I had taken. Since I was one of the first people at the terminal I had decided that I really didn't need one since there wasn't a long line. Then when they were getting ready to announce boarding and was getting all the assistant passengers together, everyone else started jumping up and I thought, oh no...so I went ahead and had them bring a wheelchair. It was great. The porter pushed me up to the ship and would have pushed me all the way to my cabin, but I said the entrance would be fine. It was really nice because all the passengers requiring assistance boarded first before anyone else. Didn't have to worry about being "run over" When you get off, the porter will be at the gang plank just as you come out of the ship.

 

If you booked thu a TA just let them know you would like a wheelchair for boarding and un boarding. If you booked it yourself, just call the cruise line and let them know you need a wheelchair.

[not in ks anymore]

I usually request wheelchair assistance as I can't stand for a long time or walk long distances. When I get to the terminal I ask for wheelchair assistance. Sometimes there is a waiting area for wheelchair assistance and they take people on a first come basis. I have had to wait up to 15 -20 minutes at times, but that time is more than made up when I am wheeled to a special handicap line for embarkation paperwork and then directly to the ship. Of course anyone in my party stays with me and doesn't have to wait in the long lines. I always tip the wheelchair pusher.

[sweetlissa]

Thanks y'all! Very informative.

 

Lissa

[redhotmermaid]

Hey everyone! :)

 

I went to the WLS seminar today. It was informative and I already have my first appt with the surgeon on Oct 7th. My hubby was worried of the financial costs, but with the insurance it looks like it will be minimal. :) So, I figure if all goes well with the pre op testing, I will be getting it at the beginning of the year! Wish me luck! ;)

good luck from the bottom of my heart

[LesaL]

I have been on several cruises where armed chairs are in the MDR. They have always had a few without arms. There may be some ships that do not, but I have not encountered any. I speak to the Maitre'D after boarding and give them my table number and request an armless chair. Usually it is at the table when I go to my assigned seating. If someone else is already sitting in it, I explain that I requested that specific chair. If the chair is not there, I speak with the waiter and wait for one to be brought for me. After that first night, it is always there and the rest of the table knows it is for me. Never had a problem.

 

If I go to open seating breakfast or lunch, I request a table with an armless chair or the waiter brings one to whichever table they seat me at.

 

Let me know if you have any questions.

 

Lesa