Jay Sam Posted August 10, 2015 #26 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I may be a strange one, but if I was on the same cruise as you I would not mind if you had pictures of your wife and your travels together to show your happy times. I am not suggesting you push those pictures on people, but some of us would be interested seeing them. Think of it as another way to keep your memories of her alive. Great idea, including a framed photo or 2 in the cabin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flintstone Posted August 10, 2015 #27 Share Posted August 10, 2015 Great idea, including a framed photo or 2 in the cabin. Agree!! I have a 4x6 framed photo of my husband that goes with me everywhere I travel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nivrag4511 Posted August 10, 2015 Author #28 Share Posted August 10, 2015 I never thought of that, but it's a great idea. I have a picture of my wife in our bedroom which I speak to and is the last thing I see each night before the lights go out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoncom Posted August 10, 2015 #29 Share Posted August 10, 2015 So did you book it? Wonderful deals like this do not last .Lots of solos just waiting for situations like this! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nivrag4511 Posted August 11, 2015 Author #30 Share Posted August 11, 2015 I did book it. I have until Sep 8 to make up my mind. That's when final is due. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
detroit70 Posted August 16, 2015 #31 Share Posted August 16, 2015 Thank you for all the encouraging responses above. I have been struggling with questions similar to those of the OP as my DH collapsed and died of a sudden and massive heart attack aboard our Panama Canal cruise last January on which we were celebrating our 45th wedding anniversary. He died just 12 hours after our Renewal of Vows service. I have booked a cruise for this coming Christmas as my attempt to deal with a holiday that had always carried a great deal of meaning for the two of us. I thought it important to be in a place very different than our previous Christmases, yet one that also holds so many warm and wonderful shared memories. I have until September 21 to cancel and I go back and forth daily about whether I should go through with it. I think I will probably re-read all of your encouraging comments a number of times in the coming weeks. Thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WetToes Posted August 16, 2015 #32 Share Posted August 16, 2015 I am so sorry for you loss. That is so sad. Only you can make this decision. I do hope, whatever you decide, that you carry on, and do something that you'll get some enjoyment from. :) Hopefully you'll find some enjoyment around the holidays. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flintstone Posted August 16, 2015 #33 Share Posted August 16, 2015 So very sorry for your loss Detroit70. Your post gave me goose bumps as I have a dear friend who lost her husband several years ago on the same Panama Canal cruise in the same manner (no vow renewal however....and she lives in the Michigan as well). As you probably are expecting, the holidays are especially hard to get through. I completely understand your wanting something "kind of the same but different". Decide what feels right for you! Sending {{{HUGS}}}. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoncom Posted August 17, 2015 #34 Share Posted August 17, 2015 Niv, NOMB but perhaps a different slant on grieving process. Only you can get over it. I go to my local Seniors Center. One lady, who now comes rarely, because she goes on and on about husbands death,is now diagnosed as clinically depressed. No one wishes to associate with her. On your ship you will have cruisers who are on their dream trip; once in a lifetime. Do not intrude on their pleasures with your grief Its a private thing. .Look at your cruise as a turning point to a new life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WetToes Posted August 17, 2015 #35 Share Posted August 17, 2015 Zoncom - I understand what you are saying, ... but I think you could have said it a little differently. Comes off a little harsh. Maybe it's just me. ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Midwestern Cruiser Posted August 17, 2015 #36 Share Posted August 17, 2015 (edited) Appreciate your original post...I'm going through a similar process and my search here led me to your question. I have followed the responses to your query and am finding them helpful. I lost my husband last summer. Have been on two cruises since (a mom/daughter sailing with friends and a cruise with single high school friends), but know a solo sailing will not be the same. The ocean is calling and I'm pretty sure I'm going, but I don't think a decision has ever been this difficult for me before. Thanks to all who commented. Even zoncon. Maybe was harsh, but a good point. Edited August 17, 2015 by MidwesternCruiser2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelMagnolia9 Posted August 17, 2015 #37 Share Posted August 17, 2015 My wife passed away last year. We did 12 cruises together. I can do an 8 night Pride over Thanksgiving for $950 including tax, fees and gratuities. The ship actually sails on the first anniversary of her passing Nov. 22. Any advice. Will I have a good time alone? Thanks I encourage you to go. Go on the cruise with no expectations except to relax & renew. If you can book 'traditional' dining, do so, as having tablemates will provide some conversation at the end of the day. You can always opt out of an evening and go elsewhere to eat. Be prepared that people will ask you why you're sailing solo and have an answer ready in response. You don't have to share that you're a widower if you feel it will open the door to a conversation or emotions that you'd rather not share with others. A simple, "I found myself with no plans this year for Thanksgiving and thought a cruise would be fun" is one possible alternative response. Be gentle with yourself and pamper yourself a bit. Change it up a bit on this cruise. Do something you haven't done previously on a cruise. Find some new and interesting things on shore. If you read, bring an interesting book. And if you don't feel like doing anything at all, except watch the sea go by, that's o.k. too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelMagnolia9 Posted August 17, 2015 #38 Share Posted August 17, 2015 I also meant to add, join the Roll Call for your cruise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakalina Posted September 24, 2015 #39 Share Posted September 24, 2015 I am facing the same dilemma as the OP. My DH passed away in Feb. of this year after taking ill on our Incan Treasures cruise. I would not even consider going so soon after his death but I won a free cabin on a 47 day South Pacific cruise. I booked it and I leave in just a few days . All of your comments here have been helpful. This will be my 26th cruise and the first as a solo. I already packed a photo for the nightstand. I hope the OP decides to go and let's us know how it went for him when he returns. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WetToes Posted September 24, 2015 #40 Share Posted September 24, 2015 I am facing the same dilemma as the OP. My DH passed away in Feb. of this year after taking ill on our Incan Treasures cruise. I would not even consider going so soon after his death but I won a free cabin on a 47 day South Pacific cruise. I booked it and I leave in just a few days . All of your comments here have been helpful. This will be my 26th cruise and the first as a solo. I already packed a photo for the nightstand. I hope the OP decides to go and let's us know how it went for him when he returns. I am sorry for your loss. I lost my husband in May. :( I'll be doing my 1st solo in March. I don't know how it will be, but I'm going. I do believe the OP did book. I'm hoping we all can find some joy in our cruises. I'll be taking a photo too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strawbs1 Posted September 27, 2015 #41 Share Posted September 27, 2015 I'm sort of going through the same thing. My husband passed on April 2nd--our favorite ship was SeaDream and I'm going on November 28th. I had planned to go with his cousin who I adore and she just backed out this week. Unlike your ship, mine has only 112 passengers if sold out. It's going to feel a bit awkward doing the cruise alone but I'm determined. I've no question that our mates will be on our minds every second of every minute of every day but, as I keep being told, mine would want me to be happy and I'm sure yours would too. It's so, so, so hard though, isn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WetToes Posted September 27, 2015 #42 Share Posted September 27, 2015 It's so, so, so hard though, isn't it? Yes, it is, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Midwestern Cruiser Posted September 29, 2015 #43 Share Posted September 29, 2015 Just returned from my first solo cruise. Was definitely different, with a few sighs along the way, but my "first" is behind me now and I'll be doing it again. When others can't join me or the sea calls my name... And here's a funny story: when I asked a table mate, who was in his 80s, what made him decide to sale solo on his first cruise, he said "the damn kids gave it to me." As I laughed, I said "oh, how terrible they must be." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WetToes Posted September 29, 2015 #44 Share Posted September 29, 2015 Just returned from my first solo cruise. Was definitely different, with a few sighs along the way, but my "first" is behind me now and I'll be doing it again. When others can't join me or the sea calls my name... And here's a funny story: when I asked a table mate, who was in his 80s, what made him decide to sale solo on his first cruise, he said "the damn kids gave it to me." As I laughed, I said "oh, how terrible they must be." I'm glad you took the plunge and things worked out for you. Lol, that is funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl Colby Pottinger Posted September 29, 2015 #45 Share Posted September 29, 2015 And here's a funny story: when I asked a table mate, who was in his 80s, what made him decide to sale solo on his first cruise, he said "the damn kids gave it to me." As I laughed, I said "oh, how terrible they must be." The horror! THE HORROR! Your kids send you away for a cruise to enjoy yourself, almost makes me wish I had kids! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flintstone Posted September 29, 2015 #46 Share Posted September 29, 2015 Just returned from my first solo cruise. Was definitely different, with a few sighs along the way, but my "first" is behind me now and I'll be doing it again. When others can't join me or the sea calls my name... And here's a funny story: when I asked a table mate, who was in his 80s, what made him decide to sale solo on his first cruise, he said "the damn kids gave it to me." As I laughed, I said "oh, how terrible they must be." So glad you are willing to go again. I am just back from my 4th solo since my husband passed. Each one gets better and better and I am truly enjoying the solo cruise now. Still uncomfortable when I have to dine alone.....and I need to work on that! Hahahaha!! Wonder if that guys family would like to adopt me!!! Debbie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Midwestern Cruiser Posted September 30, 2015 #47 Share Posted September 30, 2015 Thanks, WetToes -- I'm glad I took the plunge too! Agree, Earl Colby Pottinger...such a horror story :-} HaHa, Flintstone. Maybe I should start dropping hints to my kids. On the dining alone thing, I ask to be seated by a window and always have my kindle or a book with me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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