would you let 3 teenage girls....

[mjkacmom]

Hi Thom, you missed nothing. Almost every poster is way off track and not understanding the dangers of Jamaica.

 

I was raised as you also and am thanking my parents too. But in my opinion, Jamaica is not the place to start with the young girls independence.

 

Of course it's not the place to start! The older girls should be prepared by now. Only the OP knows the street smarts of her girls.

[Ocean Dancer]

Of course it's not the place to start! The older girls should be prepared by now. Only the OP knows the street smarts of her girls.

 

And if you read the entire thread, I said that pages ago!!;)

[michyC]

Only the OP knows his daughters.

 

However, I will say this. My daughter studied in London for a semester when she was 20. During the semester, her and a classmate (also 20) took long weekend trips to Paris and Athens...and she took one to Copenhagen alone. After the semester ended, we paid for a two week trip, that she made alone, back to Paris, then on to Switzerland, Austria, Germany and Italy before flying home. When we were helping her with the planning, we book hotels...not hostels. She never had a problem, was never uneasy and had a fantastic experience.

 

Eventually...hopefully...every child has to "leave the nest". Parents still worry, but you have to trust that you prepared them for life and taught them how to take care of themselves.

 

Oh...this was when the movie Taken was released...our son told us not to watch it until she got home.

 

She probably would have had a better time and been safer, staying at hostels. Hotels are sterile places. Hostels = instant friendship + intelligence about the surrounding area. People to go out with. Hotels, pretty much everyone sticks to themselves. If someone starts getting chummy with a young girl at a hotel, that would be a danger signal to me, at a hostel, it is a nirmal part if the Eb and flow.

[TC1957]

She probably would have had a better time and been safer, staying at hostels. Hotels are sterile places. Hostels = instant friendship + intelligence about the surrounding area. People to go out with. Hotels, pretty much everyone sticks to themselves. If someone starts getting chummy with a young girl at a hotel, that would be a danger signal to me, at a hostel, it is a nirmal part if the Eb and flow.

 

You can always count on someone at CC to let you know how you screwed up. :rolleyes:

 

The point was...people that age travel in foreign countries alone all the time. Bad things can happen anywhere on the planet...just watch the news if you don't believe me.

[michyC]

You can always count on someone at CC to let you know how you screwed up. :rolleyes:

 

The point was...people that age travel in foreign countries alone all the time. Bad things can happen anywhere on the planet...just watch the news if you don't believe me.

 

You were the one who made the point that it was hotels not hostels. Why was that distinction made? I am merely defending hostels as a very legitimate and often preferable way for people of all ages to travel. Regardless of age.

 

My 13 yo daughter asked me why anyone would stay at hostels. She was acting like it was a really grubby choice. From someone who buys ripped jeans and wears tennis shoes/athletic shoes with dresses. Lol

 

Hostels are great places to meet others when travelling alone. The hosts know that people are young with limited resources and they, and other guests show guests how to stay safe, do cool things, and less expensively. I also explained to my daughter that people stay in hostels were not generally travelling for a night, but for weeks, months, years. And about how hostels often hooked guests up with short term jobs or let them work a couple of hours for their room.

 

Now that I think about it, when the time comes for my daughter to get a pt job, I'm going to urge her to do so at a hostel. What a great way to learn about other cultures, other places and her own home town.

[kmorg1234]

Our 22 year old son was mugged in Curacao on his college grad cruise in full view of other passengers, fishermen, and locals. He was right across the bridge for those who know the area. We stopped for a beer, and he was mugged 50 feet from us.

 

 

Why? Our 22 year old son was mugged just feet from us. Was that our fault?? Were we to hold his hand? He was a college grad and we were with him.

 

We are such horrible parents, that exact son has three degrees and a PHD. U of De, Univ of Mich, and Mich State.

 

He now works for the gov't and met the President last week.

 

How horrible that we raised him this way. In your eyes we have failed as parents. I guess you want us arrested for child abuse. Lock us up right now.

 

You are NUTS!!

 

I am just SO wondering how he has " three degrees and a PHD. U of De, Univ of Mich, and Mich State." All at the age of 22. Quite a prodigy. At that age with those accomplishments, I'd let him rule the world. Better yet, he'd be a better presidential candidate than the 2 we are faced with. I'd be willing to waive the minimum age rule for him.

[Ocean Dancer]

Our 22 year old son was mugged in Curacao on his college grad cruise in full view of other passengers, fishermen, and locals. He was right across the bridge for those who know the area. We stopped for a beer, and he was mugged 50 feet from us.

 

 

Why? Our 22 year old son was mugged just feet from us. Was that our fault?? Were we to hold his hand? He was a college grad and we were with him.

 

We are such horrible parents, that exact son has three degrees and a PHD. U of De, Univ of Mich, and Mich State.

 

He now works for the gov't and met the President last week.

 

How horrible that we raised him this way. In your eyes we have failed as parents. I guess you want us arrested for child abuse. Lock us up right now.

 

You are NUTS!!

 

I am just SO wondering how he has " three degrees and a PHD. U of De, Univ of Mich, and Mich State." All at the age of 22. Quite a prodigy. At that age with those accomplishments, I'd let him rule the world. Better yet, he'd be a better presidential candidate than the 2 we are faced with. I'd be willing to waive the minimum age rule for him.

 

Well, thank you so much. I will surely tell him. He was 22 when he graduated from Delaware, then went to grad school at Mich, then law school at Mich State.

 

We called him our professional student as he never had a full time job until well into his 30's.

 

And I also agree that he would make a better president then the two that are running, but of course, I'm biased.;)

[FalklandIslander]

Well, thank you so much. I will surely tell him. He was 22 when he graduated from Delaware, then went to grad school at Mich, then law school at Mich State.

 

Like kmorg1234, I also understood from your earlier post that your son had earned both a law degree and a PhD by age 22.

[OSUZorba]

As a point of perspective. My wife and I married right after turning 22. We completely planned, booked and payed for our honeymoon cruise and did shore excursions in Jamaica, Cayman and Cozumel.

 

I personally don't really want to walk around outside the port area in Jamaica, but it is more from an annoyance point of view. I've never had a problem on a ship ran or private shore excursion in Jamaica, and definitely not in Cozumel or Cayman.

 

At some point you have to let your kids become adults and take some responsibility for themselves. I traveled a lot within the US by myself from 14-18. Moved to college at 18. This is probably why I was mature enough to plan and pay for my own cruise at age 22, while my 23 year-old co-worker has to have her daddy take care of everything for her.

 

Also I know that everyone thinks that they are Liam Neeson when it comes to protecting their kids, but in reality if your kid's tour group is robbed, all that will change by you being there is you will also be robbed. What in reality do you think you will be able to do in that situation?

[FalklandIslander]

Almost every poster is way off track and not understanding the dangers of Jamaica.

 

I was raised as you also and am thanking my parents too. But in my opinion, Jamaica is not the place to start with the young girls independence.

 

Not a single poster in this thread has suggested anything similar to "Jamaica is the place to start with the young girls' independence." Good parents would have already spent more than a decade preparing the sixteen year old, by incremental steps, for dangers much greater than an organized shore excursion in Jamaica.

[michyC]

As a point of perspective. My wife and I married right after turning 22. We completely planned, booked and payed for our honeymoon cruise and did shore excursions in Jamaica, Cayman and Cozumel.

 

I personally don't really want to walk around outside the port area in Jamaica, but it is more from an annoyance point of view. I've never had a problem on a ship ran or private shore excursion in Jamaica, and definitely not in Cozumel or Cayman. :):)

 

At some point you have to let your kids become adults and take some responsibility for themselves. I traveled a lot within the US by myself from 14-18. Moved to college at 18. This is probably why I was mature enough to plan and pay for my own cruise at age 22, while my 23 year-old co-worker has to have her daddy take care of everything for her.

 

Also I know that everyone thinks that they are Liam Neeson when it comes to protecting their kids, but in reality if your kid's tour group is robbed, all that will change by you being there is you will also be robbed. What in reality do you think you will be able to do in that situation?

 

You're right. Somebody has to stay behind to pay the ransom. :)

[xxHadleyxx]

Also I know that everyone thinks that they are Liam Neeson when it comes to protecting their kids, but in reality if your kid's tour group is robbed, all that will change by you being there is you will also be robbed. What in reality do you think you will be able to do in that situation?

 

I keep seeing people say at least one parent shoudl go along too and wondering the same thing---how would Mom being there be any sort of protection if the tour group were attacked in some way?

 

 

I had that same thing come up when my oldest used to babysite in our small town and walk home after (we do not have a car, other htan DH's work vehicle which is usually gone iwht him M-F). She'd call me when leaving and talk to me the whole way--and our town is well lit, generally safe, and other people tend to be out even very late.

 

Some people would find out she walked home from babysitting alone and say I was irresponsible and should walk over to meet her and escort her home.

Beucase somehow the middle aged out of shape 5'4" woman would be safer walking there and then able to defend her than the older teen, 5'9" in great shape black belt in karate would be walking on her own while talking to someone who could alert police ASAP if anything occurred?

 

My kids laugh and refer to that illogical notion as the belief in "magical mom powers" and wondered why I never got my powers:p

[Mark_K]

NHDisneylover,

 

In general, two people walking together are less likely to be accosted, regardless of their actual crime stopping capabilities.

 

Also, cell phones are a hot item for theft. Having one out and visible, while walking alone, late at night is not a good idea.

Edited October 11, 2016 by Mark_K

[xxHadleyxx]

NHDisneylover,

 

In general, two people walking together are less likely to be accosted, regardless of their actual crime stopping capabilities.

 

Also, cell phones are a hot item for theft. Having one out and visible, while walking alone, late at night is not a good idea.

 

Yes--but you missed the point that I, the middle aged out of shape woman, would have had to walk alone to get to her----so she would not be awlaking alone going home---and she was stronger and fitter and more able to fight (and the whole area was more or less safe, anyway).

 

And crappy old flip phones are not a hot item for theft in our area. Nice new smart phones perhaps (though at train stations and downtown areas from pickpockets, not torn from people's hands while they use them).

 

Thanks---but I am familiar with my area and know what is and is not advisable here.

 

The point was and is that having a parent around does not automatically provide any extra protection to adult aged/sized "children" Most especially in a setting like a ship sponosred shore excursion. Anything that would endanger the group would endanger it whether mom and dad were along or not.

[Cruise a holic]

Not in Jamaica. If the girls were on a ships tour at the other ports, probably yes- You have to know your child and some are very responsible, others at any age not.

 

So it is a judgement call. Do you trust your child at home? Enjoy your cruise.

[xxHadleyxx]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ocean Dancer

And I did too, I was allowed out until the street lights went on. I rode my bike everywhere, I played on the rail road tracks, :eek: Yep, I did.

 

It is a different world today, it is not the 60's anymore. I had a wonderful childhood and I was very , very lucky. No cell phones, no way to reach me and no, my parents did not always know where I was.

 

Our 22 year old son was mugged in Curacao on his college grad cruise in full view of other passengers, fishermen, and locals. He was right across the bridge for those who know the area. We stopped for a beer, and he was mugged 50 feet from us.

 

We do not live in fear, or travel in fear. We travel smart. Many on here need to learn that. Today's young adults are usually not aware of the dangers, or think nothing will happen to them. JMHO.

 

 

So, in your opinion, we have failed as parents ?

 

Why? Our 22 year old son was mugged just feet from us. Was that our fault?? Were we to hold his hand? He was a college grad and we were with him.

 

We are such horrible parents, that exact son has three degrees and a PHD. U of De, Univ of Mich, and Mich State.

 

He now works for the gov't and met the President last week.

 

How horrible that we raised him this way. In your eyes we have failed as parents. I guess you want us arrested for child abuse. Lock us up right now.

 

You are NUTS!!

 

See---I would read your experience as a good reason to say that the parents do not need to go along with the adult aged children on a shore excursion. Your scenario is showing that even when parents are RIGHT THERE they can't necesarily stop bad things from happening.

 

Now, whether or not your son was given independence and responsibility growing up so that he learned the street smarts to handle himself and the confidence that tends to turn away would be cirminals looking for an easy mark---and just still had bad luck (it happens) or not and was sending off singles that he was/is an easy target, isn't anyhitng one could possibly hope to learn from knowing your son has great grades and many degrees.

 

Plenty of super sheltered kids have great academics. And plenty of brilliant people totally lack any sort of common sense or street smarts (often becuase they chose to spend most of their free time on computers or reading books in their rooms, etc instead of out ganing those other skills). And sometims even the most street savvy person is still a victim of crime-----really the grades and degrees have nothing whatsoever to do with the situation you describe and I am at a bit of a loss as to why you put that in there? (and also read it that he had all of that by age 22---thanks for the clarification later on)

[Cruise a holic]

I agree that unfortunately we cannot always protect our children. So many incidents and horrible accidents happen close to home- As a parent, I was very nervous when my children learned how to drive- but you have to trust them and teach them to be aware of their surroundings at all times. Mostly you have to hope for good luck! Or if you are religious, pray!! So many nuts in this world today!

 

I now have grandchildren and will probably be just as nervous with them- if not more so!

[dwayneb236]

Just this weekend in Ft Worth. 6 year old little girl sleeping on sofa in her house. Dad secures doors and goes to bed. Wakes up at 4 am and child is gone with front door open, no signs of forced entry. Police search for several hours. Child is found about 1 mile from house in woods with 30+ year old man. She was heard screaming. He was arrested. Hopefully child is ok.

 

This just shows anything can happen anytime. Live life. Can't hide away. Be as vigilant as possible and teach your kids.

 

Still not known if child opened the door herself. I would think she did but you never know.

 

I'm a police officer and I myself might be concerned but not overly. Only you know the mental makeup of your daughters. You raised them right I would hope.

Edited October 11, 2016 by dwayneb236