What kind of shoes in the dinning room for

[nabby]

I am going to get her so called boyfriend to talk to her about these fancy flips, he is coming along so may be she will listen to him, leaving them home is not a option, house would be a wreck when we returned. She will be home for the summer and it just can't be done, he also says he is only taking organic jeans and t's, he is dressing( green) now days. His words not mine, am I in for some fun or not. I may stay home mysefl, this is turning into a royal battle for some no good reason. It will work out, if you see 4 people being thrown off the Star in Seattle, guess who? Thanks for the input, Buck

 

I certainly hope you are not paying for boyfriend's vacation too! What others have said is true, sometimes you need to pick your battles. Show her the "dressed up" flip flops, talk to boyfriend, but don't be surprised if she doesn't comply. Her attitude toward you seems pretty clear (the thought that she would trash your house if you were not there leaves me cold). If you are set up for Anytime Dining, then just let her and boyfriend eat by themselves, dressed however they want. You just go ahead and enjoy your vacation. Don't let a couple of brats who are much too old to be acting this way spoil it for you.

 

(Oh, and if I were you my next "battle" would be to inform the child that you will never be paying for her vacation again)

[cruiseryyc]

Maybe you should tell the boyfriend that "organic jeans" just won't cut it on formal nights. If he is trying to be green, I'm surprised he's going on a cruise. Those big ships use a heck of a lot of fossil fuel.

[beauxdammit]

If you are paying the way, then you can set reasonable rules. If these two budding anarchists want to fight the system do what we did and tell them to stay home. Advise them that the house better be in good shape when you return or they will be looking for new living arrangements. Say it and mean it. Sometimes it's tough to give tough love.

[Grannycb]

Are flip-flops worth fighting over? There were many dressy flip-flop styles worn on our cruise last week.

[ucsbgirl]

I might get flamed for this, but I wore flip flops a few times to the dining room on our last two princess cruises (Pacific and Crown). I always wore a nice outfit, Khakis with a nice shirt, and I would wear my flip flops (the kind from old navy) I was allowed in the dining room, no one ever said anything to me about it.

I didn't feel the need to bring several bulky pairs of shoes, just to wear to dinner.

[loves2cruz]

I feel that the quality of the family time spent together is more important than flip flops or not. I've seen many people enterring the diningroom in flip flops even for dinner. It probably won't be an issue, but if it is she'll have a decision to make. She may just surprise you. Enjoy these special family times together. They get harder to come by as the years pass. A family vacation is a time where life long memories are made and personally I wouldn't stress about flip flops.

[tvaud]

If she won't follow what you say - why not leave her home?

 

 

I second that. Teach her a good lesson and leave her home...or in the care of a conservative relative.:p

[megnsamsgracie]

Most of you have answered the specific question (prob OK for breakfast and lunch but not for dinner unless they are pretty high end and fancy). I think what most people forget is this is the attitude for a whole generation. I used to work with a bunch of early 20-somethings (no, I'm not even close) and they have been brought up to believe that casual attire is acceptable everywhere. Dress pants (or even dockers) are unheard of... all they want is Jeans. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, but I've seen many turn down a job if they felt the dress requirement was too stringent. Let's hope most grow up to appreciate dressing up.

 

Good luck..

 

Ya know... I have 4 kids... 11, 9, 7 and almost 5. My kids (well my boys, 11 and almost 5) LOVE casual.. the track pants and tshirts. My girls will dress up with no complaints. My boys, I have taught them that dressing casual is fine.. but there are circumstances where they have NO choice in dressing up (cruises, holidays, funerals, etc). They do it.. not always willingly but they know its something they have to do so they do it. I am trying to bring them up that at certain times, track pants and a tshirt just wont do! They have always had to dress up a few times a year so I hope when they are older, they will dress appropriately!

[4cats4me]

I am going to get her so called boyfriend to talk to her about these fancy flips, he is coming along so may be she will listen to him, leaving them home is not a option, house would be a wreck when we returned. She will be home for the summer and it just can't be done, he also says he is only taking organic jeans and t's, he is dressing( green) now days. His words not mine, am I in for some fun or not. I may stay home mysefl, this is turning into a royal battle for some no good reason. It will work out, if you see 4 people being thrown off the Star in Seattle, guess who? Thanks for the input, Buck

 

LOL!!!!:D :D

Perhaps ORGANIC jeans might be the exception to the dining room rule.

After all, GREEN is the buzz word of the day:D

[andy and amanda]

I say flip flops are ok, even at dinner. Maybe she has a pair that are a little "dress-up" instead of the 99 cent beach rubber flip flops. I say this because on all our cruises I have worn my dress "flip flops" to all meals. Those are the only shoes I own besides one pair of tennis shoes. Even on formal night I wear my "flip flops" with heels. These days there are many kinds of "flip flops" and they are called sandals. A flip flop only means that the heel portion of the sandal is not there, thus making a "flip flop" sound when you walk.

 

I must agree here - just left the CB and we saw flips at dinner in the dining room, along with people wearing shorts and jeans. The only reason I even noticed the person that I did see that was wearing flip flops was because she kept tapping them on the floor next me! :)

[tekdiva]

I have some dressier flip flops that I have worn out to dinner but my feet were well pedicured!

 

However, to your daughter's comment about doing whatever she wants, I would tell her to pay for her own trip then! On the other hand, what someone else said is true the more you push her one way she will go the other. Beat her at her own game. No matter what she says she is going to wear just say "OK". It will eventually drive her crazy!!!

[BeagleOne]

Is it too late to switch to a later cruise when your daughter and her BF will be back at school?

 

If you are paying for their trip, then you get to set some of the rules. If she can't appreciate the effort you have gone to to arrange this trip, and abide by some of those rules, then she should either not go, or pay her own way. And organic jeans and dressing green...puhleeze.

 

A cruise is not an entitlement, it is a huge privilege that some people wait their whole lives to do. And some of them never get to.

 

And if you are really worried that she would trash your house if she is left there without your supervision, if I were you, I would seriously wonder why I was even offering her this fabulous opportunity. How disrespectful to you, her parents, can she be?

 

Good luck to you, you are obviously a kind-hearted person and I hope you can work this out and have a wonderful vacation.

[juliejoe]

I guess I'm on a completely different page with this. We have 3 adult children who have not always been perfect (they are now ;) ) and a couple of them went thru a know it all phase. We survived! They were taught properly and a good example was set for them. They reach the point where they make their own choices - some not so good.

 

How many people look at feet in the dining room? Flip flops are not worth battling over. You may have more of a problem with the green jeans and t's. Just let them do their thing and if they are turned away at the dining room they will suffer the natural consequence (and you will have warned them). Tell them you are going to be seated, they can go to the buffet and you can plan to meet them somewhere after dinner.

 

IMHO you should try not to let "stuff" spoil this time with your daughter - you may not have a lot more vacations together in her/your future. They get busy in their adult lives and are not as available for spending a week with parents.

[JLC@SD]

Breakfast and Lunch? Are flip flops ok, as thats all my daughter will wear at all times, I have told her she can't go in for dinner with flip flops but she says she is going to do it anyway, She knows everything, if anyone wants to know anything just ask her. I am teed off at her but doesn't do any good. She is in college and says she can do whatever she wants including the way she dresses on a ship, she says whats the big deal about shoes? I am through talking to her and will just see what happens. I would like to seat her at a table for 1. Thanks Buck

 

.....whoa.........I think you have a bigger problem with:

 

she can do whatever she wants including the way she dresses on a ship............;)

[mere1312]

Most of you have answered the specific question (prob OK for breakfast and lunch but not for dinner unless they are pretty high end and fancy). I think what most people forget is this is the attitude for a whole generation. I used to work with a bunch of early 20-somethings (no, I'm not even close) and they have been brought up to believe that casual attire is acceptable everywhere. Dress pants (or even dockers) are unheard of... all they want is Jeans. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, but I've seen many turn down a job if they felt the dress requirement was too stringent. Let's hope most grow up to appreciate dressing up.

 

Good luck..

 

That's pretty far off and insulting. But if you once worked with a bunch of 20-somethings, you must be the expert.

 

beauxdammit... does dressing green and wearing flip flops denote anarchism? That's an interesting thought. I'd love to see that analysis.

 

Different people have different styles. I'm sure there's nothing wrong with flip flops if they are a bit more fancy for dinner. If there's a problem, I'm sure dinner without your daughter and her boyfriend would be lovely. How old is your daughter? Being so ungrateful is pretty immature.

[neecee23]

I would just go with the flow. Let this issue lie, if the dining staff refuses to let them into the dining room for dinner, well they have learned a lesson in etiquette and you have earned a quiet evening to enjoy with your wife! If not, enjoy your time as a family. Give up trying to change their attitudes, as adults it is time for your daughter and BF to learn about taking responsibility for their actions, good and bad. Relax and enjoy yourself, you're on vacation!;) Anyway, this thread has had me chuckling! Good luck, Buck! Let us know how it went.

[B40 Tha Cruisa]

Most of you have answered the specific question (prob OK for breakfast and lunch but not for dinner unless they are pretty high end and fancy). I think what most people forget is this is the attitude for a whole generation. I used to work with a bunch of early 20-somethings (no, I'm not even close) and they have been brought up to believe that casual attire is acceptable everywhere. Dress pants (or even dockers) are unheard of... all they want is Jeans. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, but I've seen many turn down a job if they felt the dress requirement was too stringent. Let's hope most grow up to appreciate dressing up.

 

Good luck..

 

I am a 20-something and enjoy dressing nicely for dinner, in fact I am a huge proponent of it as some have seen from my work here on cruise critic. LOL. For me, dressing up is a part of cruising and most people accept that but like you said there are exceptions. I can't believe someone would turn down a job because of a dress code but dont doubt that you have seen it. My generation has run into an awful job market where unemployment is extremely high and we can't afford to be picky. I am in law-enforcement so I have respect for rules whether I like them or not. I think this is what you should instill in your daughter, because if she can't follow these simple rules she is in for a rude awakening.

[fundayz]

First, let me say that you are not alone with teenagers. They can give you a run for your money and many gray hairs! Living through one now!!!

 

I think I would give her the dress code for dinner from Princess. Tell her that once on board there will be no money to purchase clothes so she should pack accordingly. That way if she gets turned away it is on her and the boyfriend. She can't blame you because you gave her the information prior to sailing about what she should bring. She may surprise you and pack something nice.

As for leaving them at home, I am with you on wanted to take them along. I would rather deal with them getting kicked out of the dinning room than worrying about my home and the liability of what is going on if you are not there.

 

But then again... I'm dumb and know nothing... out of touch with today.. and just like to rag............

 

Love the expression about raising teenagers is like trying to nail jello to a tree!

 

Have a nice drink and enjoy your trip. Also, think about the dinner served in your room for you and your wife. I hear it is very romantic and great food. That way you will have a nice relaxing night to look forward to.

 

Just my thoughts :)

[buckspc]

We have anytime dinning and will be eating at a table for 2, the other 2 can go when they want and eat where there want. I am not insisting that they dine we us. I just told them that I am changing their first class tickets for the air and they will be in the back of the plane, not sitting with us, it didn't go over to well but it is done. Thanks for all the back up I recieved here and some support from those that understand. Being parents later in life is a love hate thing, I love then when they are good and you know the other. We will be free on the cruise at a table for 2 which I was going to do from the start anyway. Buck

[pris993]

Flip flops belong at the beach or pool only. :eek:

[cruiseryyc]

Way to go Buck - I hope they have a good time at the back of the plane. I'm sure in a few years when they've grown up a bit, they will thank you for the wonderful opportunity you are giving them with this trip.

[Toto2Kansas]

We have anytime dinning and will be eating at a table for 2, the other 2 can go when they want and eat where there want. I am not insisting that they dine we us. I just told them that I am changing their first class tickets for the air and they will be in the back of the plane, not sitting with us, it didn't go over to well but it is done. Thanks for all the back up I recieved here and some support from those that understand. Being parents later in life is a love hate thing, I love then when they are good and you know the other. We will be free on the cruise at a table for 2 which I was going to do from the start anyway. Buck

 

I have read this thread with great interest. Isn't parenthood just a 'joy' at times:confused: :confused:

 

Way to go with the airfare seat change..............you are a parent I respect totally. Kids, gotta love 'em! As I have told my grown sons. Parents always love their kids, but there are times in their lives when they don't like them very much. :) The love will always be there, but the like is earned.

[AliceJ]

We have anytime dinning and will be eating at a table for 2, the other 2 can go when they want and eat where there want. I am not insisting that they dine we us. I just told them that I am changing their first class tickets for the air and they will be in the back of the plane, not sitting with us, it didn't go over to well but it is done. Thanks for all the back up I recieved here and some support from those that understand. Being parents later in life is a love hate thing, I love then when they are good and you know the other. We will be free on the cruise at a table for 2 which I was going to do from the start anyway. Buck

 

Buck:

 

Very good decision, both on the plane and dinner seating. My d.d. is 8 y.o. (and an angel at this point), but I'm bracing myself for the teenage years. May I have the backbone to make the tough decisions as you did!

[juliejoe]

Good going Buck. It sounds like you have your solution and can now not worry about what they wear. Mine would have had seats in the back of the plane to start with. I'll never forget the look on oldest son's face when he told us how "everyone's" parents were buying them NEW cars. I told him that even if we could afford to buy him a new car, we would not.

 

Toto - I love this!

Parents always love their kids, but there are times in their lives when they don't like them very much. :) The love will always be there, but the like is earned.

[SeattleCruiselover]

Most of you have answered the specific question (prob OK for breakfast and lunch but not for dinner unless they are pretty high end and fancy). I think what most people forget is this is the attitude for a whole generation. I used to work with a bunch of early 20-somethings (no, I'm not even close) and they have been brought up to believe that casual attire is acceptable everywhere. Dress pants (or even dockers) are unheard of... all they want is Jeans. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, but I've seen many turn down a job if they felt the dress requirement was too stringent. Let's hope most grow up to appreciate dressing up.

 

Good luck..

 

Rick: Boy would none of them ever work at my employer. Jeans are not allowed EVER. Tennis/athletic shoes are not allowed EVER. If your pants have belt loops, then they better have a belt in them or you are being sent home to change, sometimes even sent home for the day, without pay. I guess it is pretty easy to turn down $40.00 an hour to start if you just can't work without jeans.......Gen X is really and truly the "ME" generation.