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Reassure this worry wart please! Re: safety on ship


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When going forward to aft or vice versa, we've instructed our kids to always do so through the ship's public areas, and never down the long corridors on cabin-only decks. Just a safety precaution that helps us feel more comfortable.

 

I don't like roaming the long corridors with cabins. I always get a cabin near the elevators. I always feel vulnerable with just cabins around me. I also don't like being on the upper decks out in the open by myself at night. And I am in my 60's.

 

Laura

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Please don't let your pre-teen children roam the ship at night. We had children 8-12 running the hallways after midnight. Where were their parents? I believe in children being allowed some independence but not unsupervised on a ship with the population of a small city. There are all types of people just like neighborhoods at home.

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Okay, this reply is coming from a non-parent so don't flame me....would it help to give your 13 year old a walkie-talkie or some other devise where you can keep in contact with them? I've also heard about some ships having a system set up where you can text each other without incurring roaming/internet charges.

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When going forward to aft or vice versa, we've instructed our kids to always do so through the ship's public areas, and never down the long corridors on cabin-only decks. Just a safety precaution that helps us feel more comfortable.

 

Thank you..I like this. Will use it on our first cruise.

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I'm glad I grew up when I did. We'd ride our bikes 3 miles to the 7-11 and buy Slurpees with our allowance. I think I was 9 or 10 at the time. I feel sorry for kids today. :(

 

Agreed..we did soo much as kids. We'd play until past dark..ride our bikes everywhere ....times have changed so much. Some good..some bad.

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When I was 13 we were in Asuncion Paraguay, had lived there for 3 years at that point. I roamed the city pretty much on my own. Though more often with a buddy, with a girlfriend (i.e., taking a bus downtown to the movies on a Saturday afternoon) or with my older brother. The rules were: 1. Tell us where you are going; 2. Don't get into too much trouble; 3. Get back home before dinnertime. I survived.
Cool story, and most of the time kids'll be fine when given that much freedom; however, I do personally know more than a few stories about kids who did similar things ... and had bad results. Sometimes because of their own choices, sometimes because of their naivity, sometimes just bad luck.

 

Age-appropriate freedom onboard. That's the right answer. Not too much, not too little.

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I know when my brother was 13 he could be trusted to roam around the ship on his own. he went to Denmark, and my parents put him on the ship at Newcastle and he was met by friends at Esbjerg. A 24-hour unsupervised voyage.

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In general, it depends on the child. I would set some ground rules and let them try it out and see if they can abide by them. If so, then you can keep it the same or expand it. If not, then they lose the privileges.

 

My 11 year old was just given more freedom on our last cruise. She did have her iPod and we paid for wifi so we could contact her at any time. She followed the rules on where she could go and what she could do so we had no problems.

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In general, it depends on the child. I would set some ground rules and let them try it out and see if they can abide by them. If so, then you can keep it the same or expand it. If not, then they lose the privileges.

 

My 11 year old was just given more freedom on our last cruise. She did have her iPod and we paid for wifi so we could contact her at any time. She followed the rules on where she could go and what she could do so we had no problems.

 

 

Please don't misunderstand this, but how do you know she followed the rules on where she could go and what she could do?

 

Doubtless you trust her and she has I hope earned that trust, but do you realy know what she dd and where she went when she wasn't with you.

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Please don't misunderstand this, but how do you know she followed the rules on where she could go and what she could do?

 

Doubtless you trust her and she has I hope earned that trust, but do you realy know what she dd and where she went when she wasn't with you.

 

I don't know about Breeze123 but with our kids the trust was earned by periodically being the ones to let them know we were changing locations and we would find our kids where they said they were going to be when we went to let them know.

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Please don't misunderstand this, but how do you know she followed the rules on where she could go and what she could do?

 

Doubtless you trust her and she has I hope earned that trust, but do you realy know what she dd and where she went when she wasn't with you.

 

 

I checked in via text and also did random spot checks. This isn't new for us. She has earned our trust by proving her responsibility both at home and on vacation. She knows the consequences of lying and breaking our trust. She obviously doesn't have free reign of her life as an 11 year old but she is responsible enough to handle some freedom.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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I checked in via text and also did random spot checks. This isn't new for us. She has earned our trust by proving her responsibility both at home and on vacation. She knows the consequences of lying and breaking our trust. She obviously doesn't have free reign of her life as an 11 year old but she is responsible enough to handle some freedom.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

 

Thanks

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Let's be clear, there are no more sexual predators running around loose than there were 20, 30, or 40 years ago. They are a stable percentage of the population, not increasing. What there is now is far more fear of this proportionately small number of pedophiles than there used to be.

 

So there isn't a pedophile lurking behind every corner now. Same as always, there are a small number of pedophiles. Most pedophiles try to "groom" their targets - they befriend them, try to latch on to them, suck up to them if you will. If your child starts mentioning someone's name regularly, have an eye out. Really skillful pedophiles will also "groom" the family, to gain trust. So if an adult starts hanging around your family, telling you how great your kid is and offering to do things with the kid, have an eye out. This advice applies equally to cruise ships and communities.

 

It's not about whether the child adheres to your "rules." You chose go on this cruise with your kids. You didn't leave them with family or friends so you could lounge around doing whatever you like to do - you chose to take the kids on the cruise. So for me, it's about the "rules" you give yourself as a parent. Why aren't you doing something fun with them? Why aren't you where they are because you like being with them? Why aren't you thinking of ways you can have great times together as a family? If you wanted a vacation where you didn't have to look after the kids, you should have arranged that. If you brought the kids, you should be making this a vacation about all of you.

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Let's be clear, there are no more sexual predators running around loose than there were 20, 30, or 40 years ago. They are a stable percentage of the population, not increasing. What there is now is far more fear of this proportionately small number of pedophiles than there used to be.

 

So there isn't a pedophile lurking behind every corner now. Same as always, there are a small number of pedophiles. Most pedophiles try to "groom" their targets - they befriend them, try to latch on to them, suck up to them if you will. If your child starts mentioning someone's name regularly, have an eye out. Really skillful pedophiles will also "groom" the family, to gain trust. So if an adult starts hanging around your family, telling you how great your kid is and offering to do things with the kid, have an eye out. This advice applies equally to cruise ships and communities.

 

It's not about whether the child adheres to your "rules." You chose go on this cruise with your kids. You didn't leave them with family or friends so you could lounge around doing whatever you like to do - you chose to take the kids on the cruise. So for me, it's about the "rules" you give yourself as a parent. Why aren't you doing something fun with them? Why aren't you where they are because you like being with them? Why aren't you thinking of ways you can have great times together as a family? If you wanted a vacation where you didn't have to look after the kids, you should have arranged that. If you brought the kids, you should be making this a vacation about all of you.

 

I agree and disagree. My son is 12.. Would he rather hang out with other kids or me?? Hmmmm,,,the kids clubs don't allow the parents to hang out with the kids there..do they? So..should the parents then just sit and wait outside the club? Why can't it be a vacation for everyone?Some me time..some their time..some our time? I don't see anything wrong with that. I have no intention of getting on the cruise and never seeing my kids again..but I think it's possible to have a little of everything.

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Please don't misunderstand this, but how do you know she followed the rules on where she could go and what she could do?

 

Doubtless you trust her and she has I hope earned that trust, but do you realy know what she dd and where she went when she wasn't with you.

 

Why would you even say that?

 

Some of things people say on here is just unbelievable.

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I think your son will probably be fine. Perhaps exploring the ship together on the first day as a family might be a good idea. That way you could all get a feel for where things are and what precautions you and your son might feel are appropriate. He may meet some new friends in the first few minutes and that may relieve your apprehension.

 

I agree with the posters who suggest having your children walk through the public areas, as it seems they are more likely to be seen. However, here is the bottom line. People who intend bad things will find a way to make it happen. I would say MOST people on a cruise are there just enjoying themselves and have no ill will toward anyone else. Most people would take notice if they saw a young person walking around looking lost or seeming to be in a state with which they feel uncomfortable. Our last cruise on Mariner, there was a little boy who sat at the table next to us every night with his family. When we were at Labadee, he somehow got separated from him mom. He was looking around a little worried, but came up and sat down on my lounge chair and asked me to help him find his mom. There was a security person close by. My husband told him that the little boy needed to find his parents. He stayed right with us until mom came to retrieve him. Just make sure your son thinks about who he can trust in the event he needs something. I think at 13, he's probably ready to wander on his own a bit aboard ship.

 

I do think that staying in a group, with other people, may be a natural occurrence at that age. Kids tend to travel in packs once they make friends.

 

All that to say, relax. If your son is pretty good about rules at home, he will be fine.

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I was horrified on an extended family cruise that my 6&8yo nephews were allowed to roam as long as they stayed together....of course the only place they went was the arcade.....the older teen nephews hunted for girls all week....inept and fun to watch....we were sure to embarrass them frequently....there is no fool proof way to protect....my own son was 20 ft away from us in a public bathroom when accosted by an older man...he impolitely yelled at the man and joined us seconds later....the man took off from another entrance....this was Ogunquit beach in maine many years ago...my son was 12,looked older and very "pretty"....we had prepared him for that moment with common sense and repitition.....

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Why would you even say that?

 

Some of things people say on here is just unbelievable.

 

 

Because I was interested in what techniques they were using to check on the kids. You see one of the ways you learn things in this life is by asking others how they have dealt with situations, you will note I actually said that was sure their child had earned their trust,m what I was interested in was how that had happened.

 

And yes what you said was unbelievable, I asked a polite question and you come along attacking me.

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