Not showing up to dinner - how to inform tablemates.

[Hflors]

If we decide not to go to dinner (maybe have something sent to our cabin) Which would be the better option for informing our table mates.

A) On the first night express that if we are more than 5 minutes late any time during the cruise that they are to start dinner with out us

B) call the matri'd just before the dinner we will miss and tell him that we will not be having dinner in the diningroom that evening

 

I was thinking about this as our stop in Aruba lasts until 7:30 pm and dinner is at 6 we may not want to have dinner in the dining room that night.

 

Any suggestions.

[FinelyCruising]

Based on your description, I'd let the Maitre'd and Tablemates know the night before that Port of Call, you may opt out or be delayed, and to start without you.

 

Your reasons for doing so are more than understandable and are in my humble opinon HIGHLY considerate.

 

Handling this way takes the pressure off you in advance of leaving messages the brief period before dinner and helps in making sure everyone knows in advance so they can plan and shift gears as needed without hard feelings if you come or you don't. In the night before open environment, I am guessing you will be told you will be missed and wished well if you do not join, and will be welcomed with suprise if you make it.

[Lois R]

So, being on a cruise means some people leave their

manners at home? Oh..ok...:eek: :rolleyes:

 

To the Original Poster, You know you are doing the courteous

thing:). If you are sitting with others yes, I would take the 2

minutes and let them know you won't be joining them. That

is probably how long it takes;)

 

Even for those who sit at a deuce, they could let the Maitr'd

know they won't be eating in the dining room.

In my opinion (and it seems a few others too) it is just

the right thing to do...a courtesy.

[Luxuriate]

I think calling ahead to the wait staff is a fabulous idea. Never thought of it. My husband and I really enjoy eating dinner in the dining room and have always made it a point to show up (even when we had waaaayyy too much to drink on the excursion)..gulp. Anyway, I think letting your table mates know ahead of time is very courteous.

[Nancyquilts]

A)

 

Unless you know the night before.

[land lover]

I think placing a time limit, option A is a good choice, we have done this and even if we show up late at least it did not hold up our table mates.

 

I was shocked on our 1st cruise with X this last January how the waiter would actually hold up his whole section waiting for people...I guess he only wanted to make one trip to the kitchen for each course......

[salty dingo]

I have rarely had tablemates inform me, so we usually wait a reasonable amount of time, and the waiter does as well, but eventually we continue without them.

 

Rather than informing tablemates, I think it would be best to inform the wait staff, who will inform everyone else at the table.

 

The best way to do that is unclear. I think you could probably write a note and take it to the dining room and give it to someone who would pass it along.

[DaisyGirl55]

I totally agree with the everyone on this board about letting both your table mates and your wait staff know if you will be missing dinner in the dining room. My DH and I will be sailing at Alaska this summer, and in a CC cabin. I know that at least one night, we will most likely have dinner on our balcony (oh I just love the sound of that...dinner on the balcony!). We have every intention of letting our table mates know as well as our wait staff the night we plan on eating in our room. It just shows courtesy for those sharing our table, and for the wait staff who work so darn hard.

[Hflors]

Thanks everyone for your responses. I think I will just mention to our tablemates and Waitstaff (thanks to all that reminded me of the waitstaff, I didn't think of them, DUH!) if we are more than 5 min late to consider that we will not be coming to dinner.

 

 

Helen

[Rev22:17]

salty dingo,

 

Rather than informing tablemates, I think it would be best to inform the wait staff, who will inform everyone else at the table.

 

Either will do. The main thing is that somebody at the table knows that you are not coming so that the table is not stuck waiting for your non-arrival.

 

[/quote=You]The best way to do that is unclear. I think you could probably write a note and take it to the dining room and give it to someone who would pass it along.

 

If you know the night before, it's quite easy to inform everybody during dinner the night before. You'll generally know in advance if you have a shore excursion that runs late or if you have reservations at a specialty restaurant.

 

In other situations, use whatever means you have available. Perhaps you encounter a tablemate around the pool, at an activity, or elsewhere around the ship who is going to dinner whom you can tell.

 

And actually, the ship's staff should communicate the fact that you have a reservation for alternative dining or a specialty restaurant to your waiter automatically. Although still a courtesy required by social etiquette, they should be well aware of your plans in such situations before you inform them.

 

Norm.

[mii]

To the OP: It is really very simple. It would be A. This is what we have done on all of our cruises. On the first nite after meeting our tablemates we then tell THEM and the WAIT STAFF if we are 5 minutes or more(because we are always on time) go ahead and start dinner without us. Then that takes care of the whole time of the cruise, no one has to wait, the staff knows, the tablemates know and everyone can enjoy their dinner. We have done this on 10 cruises and it works like a charm.

 

Marilyn

[berryhappy24]

I never thought about notifying anyone (this is our first cruise) but will on our cruise, and I like the 5 minute rule.

 

Another question- We plan on showing up to dinner on time, but if we are 10-15 minutes late and the table has already started dinner, will our server still serve us? Or, should we just go to an alternative dining option?

[Lois R]

Hi:) ...unless something is "unexpected"....most folks are in

the dining room within about 5 minutes of dinner time.

 

Actually, I let the line go in first...yes, even though after the first

night everyone knows where their table is located, people still wait

in front of those Dining Room doors. I just stay in the Martini Bar

and go after them. Easier that is for sure;) and more time to finish

that drink:D

 

15 minutes late? I am betting they will serve you but that

(in my opinion) is cutting it too close...8:30 dinner..I am there

between 8:30-8:35. Lots of things get accomplished for the wait

staff in those 1st 15 minutes. Menus, what the waiter recommends, drinks,

etc.

[Blazerboy]

Well, nice to know that most people here are right on target with what's appropriate to do!:)

 

I might add that:

 

a.) everyone DOES understand if a ship's shore excursion is late in returning, so don't fret too much...the word usually gets to the dining room staff that the ship-organized ones are running late (and people on them are sometimes informed to plan on alternate casual dining that night).

 

and, b.) DO try to tell either your waiter, ass't maitre d', or maitre d' that you won't be dining in the restaurant if you know for sure...it allows them to set the table for the right number, rather than setting the table, and then clearing it while your table mates wait...

 

There is also a potential benefit to your table mates if you let them know in advance: On a recent cruise, the other six at our table of 8 were going to the specialty restaurant, and we decided we didn't want to go again (clothing getting tight!;) ) so we stuck with the main diningroom. In the meantime, we met our stateroom neighbors, liked them, and then heard that they were in first seating, but had wanted to try second, but didn't know if they'd like it for the whole two weeks. So we were able to arrange, knowing our other tablemates' plans, to have our neighbors join us for an evening. They seemed to enjoy it, we enjoyed their company, and the waiter, with notice, was glad to accomodate us. Win-win for everyone, and our regular tablemates were back the next night, and we continued to enjoy their company, too. Long way of saying a little politeness added a special evening to our cruise!

 

Oh, and we also find that we get the rhythm of our table in the first night or two, and we've been at table where the norm is to show up exactly on time, and others where the norm is to be about ten minutes after. Sometimes it works out naturally, other times you can just discuss and agree what everyone would like. The dining room is set up to accomodate diners arriving within that first 15 minutes, so being ten minutes late isn't bad, but if the rest of your table is waiting, it's not considerate. As we're usually having drinks together in the Martini bar, it's not an issue!:D

 

Andrew

[Jarronwood]

Having just returned from a 14 day Summit cruise, my husband was very tired to go to the first night - too many martinis at sail away - At 8.20 I went to the dining room and spoke to a maitre d asking him to pass a message on to "our" tablemates that we would not be with them for the first night, having come from the UK and being jet lagged but would joint them the following night. We met them the following night and they had received the message.

 

As it happened we actually changed tables a night later to tablemates more suited to us. The couple we met at the London airport on our flight out to Miami said that 2 of their tablemates no longer wanted to sit with them and since we "gelled" with them so much better than our existing tablemates, we got moved. That night when the maitre'd came over I asked him to send a message to our previous table saying we were staying with our friends from England.

 

Its only polite surely!

[Susan-M]

That night when the maitre'd came over I asked him to send a message to our previous table saying we were staying with our friends from England.

 

Its only polite surely!

 

Yes - and you avoided hurting the feelings of the original tablemates.

 

On our first cruise, after our first dinner, my DH and I were beside ourselves wondering how we were going to spend the next 11 nights with one particular person who was at our table .... we decided to give it another try the next night and ended up staying for the rest of the cruise ... I guess he was just excited on the first night of his cruise and a little 'over the top' with enthusiasm .... he turned out to be the one of the most interesting and delightful people that we've shared cruise dinners with and we were very glad that we gave it a second try :)

[Jarronwood]

Hi Susan

 

You are very right about staying. We would never had consciously moved but would have "stuck it out" since the other couple were very nice but because we really got on so well with the couple we met at the Airport and even stayed in the same hotel in Miami pre cruise and that evening by chance met at the bar for pre dinner drinks with a menu in hand it was like having duplicates of ourselves. As soon as we met one another it seemed like we had known one another for years. By joining them and their tablemates, I know we have made a very firm friendship which will only get better since we live near one another and will meet for dinner etc.

 

 

I know you can make firm friendships with your tablemates but because of the vast different locations staying in touch is difficult. Having Jan and Bob nearby makes a lot of difference.

[Blazerboy]

I know you can make firm friendships with your tablemates but because of the vast different locations staying in touch is difficult. Having Jan and Bob nearby makes a lot of difference.

Ahhh, but then you miss the opportunity to stalk....err...visit friends you've made in far off places! Me, I hunt down anyone who has houses in the UK or on the Continent...

 

Ya' don't have a weekend place in Palma de Mallorca, by chance??:D ;)

 

Andrew

[Hflors]

Jarronwood - that is a wonderful story. I'm happy for both you and the other couple. I hope you both have a long and happy friendship. And many more cruises of course!

[Susan-M]

Hi Susan

 

You are very right about staying. We would never had consciously moved but would have "stuck it out" since the other couple were very nice but because we really got on so well with the couple we met at the Airport and even stayed in the same hotel in Miami pre cruise and that evening by chance met at the bar for pre dinner drinks with a menu in hand it was like having duplicates of ourselves.

 

Hi Josie - I apologize if I made it sound like I thought you should have stayed with the original tablemates ..... I think it's wonderful that you met up with such compatible people who are now your new friends .... and I think you handled the whole situation extremely well. :)

[whale2rider]

This is our first cruise, with the main goals of seeing the beautiful Alaskan scenery and to relax. This all sounds like a lot of pressure to me - what if you decide at the last minute, that you don't want to dress up for dinner and just want to go the casual restaurant or have something in your room?

 

I would never want to insult anyone or have them take it personally. Will we be expected to be in the formal dining room at a specific time (we indicated the early option) every night? I don't think I like the thought of being so regimented...or that other people will be affected by our decisions.

[Lois R]

This is our first cruise, with the main goals of seeing the beautiful Alaskan scenery and to relax. This all sounds like a lot of pressure to me - what if you decide at the last minute, that you don't want to dress up for dinner and just want to go the casual restaurant or have something in your room?

 

I would never want to insult anyone or have them take it personally. Will we be expected to be in the formal dining room at a specific time (we indicated the early option) every night? I don't think I like the thought of being so regimented...or that other people will be affected by our decisions.

 

Hi...please bare with me while I ask a few questions...when you

booked this cruise, did you use a Travel Agent or did you book

directly with the cruiseline?

The reason I ask is a good TA would have informed you of

the traditional dining Celebrity offers. Yes, if you eat in the dining

room there are 2 dining times. Main is at 6:00...late is 8:30.

Did your TA ask if you wanted to sit with other passengers

or have a deuce?

 

Many of us who sail Celebrity enjoy going to the dining

room each evening.

 

If you choose not to, as stated earlier, the courteous thing

would be to let your Maitr'd know. (they will have your seats

set) and if they know before hand they can clear them away.

 

I have never thought about eating at certain time being

under pressure. (but that is just me).

 

If you prefer to eat whenever you want and you don't know

what you will want to do ahead of time? Not sure what to tell you...

but the main dining room will have 2 seats for you.

 

As for being regimented, and I don't mean this to sound short or offensive,

but there are cruiselines that offer totally open seating for dinner,

eat at whatever time you prefer....no scheduling involved.

[Spender Nui]

We always make it known if we're not going to be at dinner. Unfortunately some who should care don't.

 

We received a same day invitation to the captain's table for dinner. Although we were seated at a table for 2 we had pre-ordered wine and wanted the wine steward to know and also thought we should let the waiter know as a courtesy. We asked the captain's club hostess, who issued the invitation, to let them know. She said she would. The next night at dinner both asked us where we had been.

 

Exactly the same circumstances on another cruise...this time we asked the ass't maitre d' to let them know. He said he would...next night at dinner we had the same result as before. Seems as if some of the ship's staff aren't as as concerned about it as we do.

 

That said I still think it's the right thing to do.

[whale2rider]

Yes, we realize we are sitting with others and requested the early dining. I have a feeling we will not want to have a formal dinner every night, so according to what you've discussed, the right thing to do will be to advise the dining room when we do not plan to eat there? I guess that's not a huge big deal, we will certainly do that. I just didn't realize it was such a commitment.

 

Also, don't you have to pay an additional $60 every time you have dinner in the formal dining room? Not that that's an issue for us, but sometimes it's nice to just have a relaxing dinner on the balcony don't you think?

[Lois R]

Hi, no, you don't pay extra for the dining room.

The "Specialty Restaurants" are extra...those are on the M-Class

ships and they are separate from the dining room.

 

Your dinner in the Main Dining Room is included in the

price of your cruise.