Modern day purpose of formal night?

[ILVMM]

Whenever I cruise with my girlfriends (and we do this annually) we definitely attend formal nights. We share suitcases just in case one gets lost.

 

When cruising with DH, no formal nights.

 

What I have found is that bringing along "dress up" clothes takes up a lot of room in the suitcase(s) whereas, just bringing "hanging out" clothes allows me to bring a smaller suitcase and less shoes!

 

I wonder if that's why so many folks decide not to attend?

[krystalkruzer]

My thought would be that by having formal night they are trying to cater to passengers who still enjoy it.And for the more casual type there are the alternative dining venues.So everybody on board is happy.

[pris993]

We enjoy dressing, generally dress up for dinner every night. Infact, my husband, who is from Europe originally, prefers to dress up for dinner. So we do what feels good to us. He always brings a tux, white dinner jacket, and suit; along with sport jackets. Casual nights we tone it down a bit unless it is on Friday or Saturday evening.

 

For us, dressing for dinner is about taking pride in one's self and making the evening special. Cruising is a special experience anyway, dressing simply adds to it. We always get a table for two, so what we do does not really impact anyone else. :)

[MsMinx]

Apart from weddings, formal nights on cruises are the only chance I get to really dress up, so I love them!! The more the better for me :D

[RetireeWannabee]

I don't see why dressing "formally" is such a big deal, either! It's absolutely NO HARDER to slip on a long gown, than it is to pull on capris and a top! (Granted, for men, there is the extra step of putting on a tie, but c'mon--it's not THAT hard to do!)

I've just never understood why folks make such a big deal about dressing to look really HOT!!!!!

 

I have to disagree with this.

 

First, you have to have something that might be described as "a gown" (which usually is preceded by "night" in my wardrobe). I hate shopping, but, ok, say I go buy One Gown that I will have exactly 2 wearings of before I have no further need of it.

 

Depending on its design, those of us with, um, Ample Presence may require the assistance of special foundation garments that may or may not stay in place all night. And may or may not require help to get into, given the tendinitis in my shoulders and arthritis in my hands. And may or may not poke at me horribly all evening.

 

Then there are the heels. Suffering from sciatica periodically, heels can do me in. Many dresses would not look right without heels so I risk limping the next few days. I'm not sure where Emily Post is on whether or not a woman has to wear panty hose these days, but those are horribly uncomfortable for me. I've always hated em.

 

Having longish hair, there is the subtle expectation that I sweep it up into some elegant 'do befitting the gown and occasion, but, alas, I do not know how to do that. Forgive the cheap barrette, please. At least it's not a scrunchy.

 

I don't have expensive jewelry to complete the look, so please ignore my naked ears, throat and wrists or withhold comment should I don cheap substitutes.

 

I don't wear capris, so can't comment on how easy or hard they are to put on but, Just Slip On A Gown is a significant understatement for many of us. It's nice that it's so simple for you but I hope you can understand that it's not that simple for everyone.

 

 

Back to the original topic - I definitely think it goes back to The Olden Days when everyone 'dressed for dinner'. It's charming, and I think it will remain a long time.

[annierie]

I don't see why dressing "formally" is such a big deal, either! It's absolutely NO HARDER to slip on a long gown, than it is to pull on capris and a top! (Granted, for men, there is the extra step of putting on a tie, but c'mon--it's not THAT hard to do!)

I've just never understood why folks make such a big deal about dressing to look really HOT!!!!!

 

 

Formal clothing weighs more for my husband than resort casual does. His formal suit with shoes, etc. weighs 8 pounds. If we fly to Tahiti and do a post cruise in Bora Bora, we have a 44 pound per person weight limit. I do not find it enjoyable to give up almost 20% of his wieght allowance for something dark and warm to be worn for 8 hours total on a ship in the South Pacific.

 

Add to that the problem these days with lost or misplaced luggage, and we don't particularly enjoy the possibility of losing our more expensive clothing with little real compensation for it, unless we want the hassle involved.

 

We'll continue to pick the casual luxury lines that don't require formal, and let the mass market cruise lines continue to make money on photos, which is one of the real reasons formal nights continue to exist.;)

[eh2zed]

All too often people relate formal night and formal dress as a dinner event. Rather it is a formal night that includes usually a reception, maybe a visit to a lounge, dinner, a late evening show and then maybe some dancing. Its a whole night affair. This is not unlike a masquerade party or a beach party or other themed night. Formal night provides for a little sophistication and formality. Wouldn't want it every night but a few nights a cruise is fine.

[Happy ks]

I'll turn the question around and ask...why do people think cruising is such a casual vacation they think it is something they don't need to dress for?

 

Many of the ships dining rooms and lounges are luxurious, the service is superb and the food, while not gourmet, is served in courses in a formal environment. Much more formal even on casual evenings than where we dine at home.

 

If it were up to me, I'd do away with "formal" night and replace it with semi-formal every night of the cruise, except first and last night.

 

Casual clothes are worn all day long every day, cleaning up for dinner isn't just traditional for us. It marks the end of the day, time to raise a glass and toast to celebrate our good fortune that we have the means to enjoy such a wonderful trip with civilised people.

 

When we're at work we don't have the opportunity to dress nicely, a cruise is a departure and a different life for us. We like to try to look good and appreciate the feeling of being a part of the "finer things in life".

[annierie]

I'll turn the question around and ask...why do people think cruising is such a casual vacation they think it is something they don't need to dress for?

 

Many of the ships dining rooms and lounges are luxurious, the service is superb and the food, while not gourmet, is served in courses in a formal environment. Much more formal even on casual evenings than where we dine at home.

 

Some of us cruise for destination, and spend lots of time pre and post cruise traveling around. Carrying unneccessary items for a formal night is a waste of space to us. By the way, my husband always travels with a jacket and tie, but doesn't enjoy lugging the heavy dark suits. We always dress nicely for dinner. Do they change dining rooms for the other nights that are casual or informal? No, they don't.

 

If it were up to me, I'd do away with "formal" night and replace it with semi-formal every night of the cruise, except first and last night.

 

Casual clothes are worn all day long every day, cleaning up for dinner isn't just traditional for us. It marks the end of the day, time to raise a glass and toast to celebrate our good fortune that we have the means to enjoy such a wonderful trip with civilised people.

 

I can do that with nice slacks or skirts and tops, while DH is wearing lightweight slacks and shirts, maybe a linen or silk jacket, things that work well in the climate we are visiting.

 

When we're at work we don't have the opportunity to dress nicely, a cruise is a departure and a different life for us. We like to try to look good and appreciate the feeling of being a part of the "finer things in life".

 

Well, DH wears suits or blazers much of the year, and I have way too many days with meetings that require business suits. For me, itinerary is what sells me a cruise, and I want to drop down to resort wear or country club casual and not drag around suits and dresses. I prefer packing my bags with books, snorkeling gear, binoculars, camera gear, and leaving the suits home.

 

Tahiti, Greek Isles, Seychelles, Med islands off of Italy, Galapagos, Antarctica, Alaska -- these are the places that are on my "been there" and "to do" lists. I don't need a gown and DH doesn't need a dark suit in order to enjoy those destinations.

 

I know we all are different, so I'm happy to find cruise lines that cater to my style. We want maximum time in ports and we want fine dining, not being banished to the cafeteria because DH has on a linen jacket and no tie, and I'm in skirts and tops.:)

[caviargal]

I know we all are different, so I'm happy to find cruise lines that cater to my style. We want maximum time in ports and we want fine dining, not being banished to the cafeteria because DH has on a linen jacket and no tie, and I'm in skirts and tops.:)

 

And that is the right answer, IMO, to find a cruise line that caters to your style and preferences. Don't choose a ship with formal nights and then complain about them or disregard them as others likely choose the ship for just those reasons.

 

We generally do not cruise for itinerary as we both prefer to explore an area in depth on a land trip versus a drive by visit. For me, I used to cruise to enjoy the overall experience but these days that becomes harder and harder to find at a price that makes it possible more than once every few years.

[BobBeaSea]

It's only a matter of time until "formal night(s)" are gone from mass market cruising. I can only reference RCI as this is the only line I've cruised with. Semi-formal is long gone...Smart Casual might as well be gone...how far behind will Formal be? Time will tell.

[caviargal]

It's only a matter of time until "formal night(s)" are gone from mass market cruising. I can only reference RCI as this is the only line I've cruised with. Semi-formal is long gone...Smart Casual might as well be gone...how far behind will Formal be? Time will tell.

 

I agree. The advent of Anytime Dining on RCI as well as the fact that they now allow jeans and shorts at dinner is a clear indication of things to come.

 

On our last few RCI cruises, we opted for specialty restaurants every night of the cruise to avoid the main dining room. People still tend to dress up more for the extra charge venues.

[wraithe]

My wife and I thoroughly enjoy formal nights onboard ship, and like others have said, that is formal night, not just dinner. Makes it a lot more worthwhile to dress up, if you're staying dressed all evening. I carry two formal outfits myself (tux and dress uniform), and include a sport coat for the less formal nights. I've found many opportunities to dress up since I bought my tux, you'd be surprised how often you can wear formal wear if you want to. We've been taking ballroom dance lessons for almost two years now, and that lends to many opportunities to dress nicely and enjoy dinner and dancing. As for being a PITA, on the contrary, I bought my tux and uniforms, had them altered to fit me well, and they are as comfortable as my khaki cargo pants and a polo shirt. It's not that hard to pack, even if flying, if that's what you want to do. Happy cruising.

[okbowler]

Amem brother Bill

[In2why]

So men....and women by the way....can get lucky?

Seriously.

[bychance]

I think it is entertainment for passengers provided by the passengers. I'm tired of hauling formal clothes on cruises. We have neighbors out on a Crystal cruise right now. They took no formal clothes at all. It will be interesting to see how they are treated on formal nights as they have cruised on Crystal many times.

 

Gone are the days when my husband packed a tux to wear once or twice on a cruise.

 

We avoid cruise lines that 'require' formal wear. Oceania looks good to us now.

 

On our last cruise we had 8:30 dinner. Some had 5:45. We went to both formal nights(dressed) but we were not dressed by the 5:45 seating. I am not sure why if you are not dressed you would get treated differently. It was just to early for us to be dressed.

[bychance]

I don't understand the entire concept of formal night. Makes no sense to me.

Back in the old days, before air travel was the primary means of crossing the Atlantic, passenger ships carried everyone

across the ocean. By far, the vast majority of the tens of millions that crossed, traveled in 3rd class, steerage, basic

transportation. The good old days of transatlantic crossings were basic average typical working people that had to get from

point A to point B for work, business or family. They were not out to impress anybody. Doubt that most of them could, even

if they tried to.

Transatlantic crossings were year round, cold weather, rough weather, many people got sick. These were not luxury vacation

cruises with midnight buffets, orchestras, spa treatments, and hot tubs. They were just a week or so of transportation the

only way available.

Yes, there were the Rockefellers and the Astors. The newspapers had a society column that named the rich and famous and

described their outfits and told which ships they would be sailing on. Like the stars of today, they lived their lives

trying to stay in the papers, trying to be famous for being famous and fashionable. These were a small percentage of the

passengers. Between freight and steerage (not much difference between the two from a cruise line perspective) is how the

ships and lines made their money.

In those days one wore a jacket to dinner because it was COLD. You didn't wear shorts to dinner because it would be a fashion

faux pax, but because you would freeze their legs off.

It seems to me that people who cling to formal nights today want to either dress up because they enjoy it and it makes them

feel good, or in some cases, pretend to be a part of the old style wealthy upper crust.

Formal means different things to different people at different times. No need to bundle up in a heavy jacket, vest and tie

in the hot tropical sun, that's not formal, that's a sweaty smelly uncomfortable sticky PITA. The style of today, today's

fashion, that's what people should wear. Nice, clean matching clothes. Look good, smell good, feel good.

The only time anyone would know of a fellow diner were wearing short pants is while they were making the short walk from the

dining room door to the table. Anyone who looks under the table during the meal to see if knees are showing is weird.

Today people cruise for the vacation aspect. There are probably exceptions, but cruisers of today cruise to get away and to

have fun. A cruise is not transportation, but a vacation destination that might visit ports along the way, and then return

to the original port. Six hours in a port is not touring the island. A foo foo drink at Senor Frogs is not mingling with

the natives, cave tubing is not Indiana Jones, swimming in Cozumel is not archeology.... It's a fun vacation. Nothing wrong

with that; it's a good thing. And today, with the millions of people that cruise, no one will be impressed and awed if they

find out that we went on a cruise. The big deal is that it is a nice, fun, relaxing vacation with other fun people that are

looking to make friends and have a good time.

 

 

 

Thank you! this is what I always thought! It should be fun!:D

[okbowler]

bychance and solo 1959

I agree that it should be about fun. For us dressing up for dinner two nights a week and to be with others dressed to the nines is part of that fun. That is the reason we don't eat in the dining room on formal nights if we don't feel like dressing, also the reason we don't cruise CCL or NCL. We enjoy seeing the Scots in their kilts, service people in their uniforms,the tuxes, dinner jackets, the ladies in the pretty dresses and fancy tops and skirts and slacks. Does it ruin our meal if you come to dinner in shorts and a tee shirt, no, but does it take something away from the evening, you betcha. I don't see why when a dress code is suggested and there are alternitive sites available for those who choose not to follow the suggestion, you would want to want to make my enjoyment of the evening less by the way you dress. Its my vacation too,I paid just like you did, and I chose a cruise line that has a dress code that I like. You have the same choice. imho Bill

[qorc]

Elegant meals, especially when dressed up, are part of the ambience and the cruise experience.

 

I even bought a tux to take on cruises. I love those nights.

[daiB]

And that is the right answer, IMO, to find a cruise line that caters to your style and preferences. Don't choose a ship with formal nights and then complain about them or disregard them as others likely choose the ship for just those reasons.

 

We generally do not cruise for itinerary as we both prefer to explore an area in depth on a land trip versus a drive by visit. For me, I used to cruise to enjoy the overall experience but these days that becomes harder and harder to find at a price that makes it possible more than once every few years.

 

 

 

This is the most sensible post on this thread.

 

For those of us who think that one of the most important things about cruising, is dressing up with style. Then a cruise line with formal nights, which are well observed, is essential.

 

P&O (UK) ships, have formal nights at which 95% to 99% of men wear DJ's, the others wearing dark suits with a tie. This is exactly the way we like it. Formal wear is worn all night and in all venues. If we want a non formal cruise then we go with Ocean Village, an off shoot of P&O.

 

Surely what is required is choice and that is what the cruise lines should provide. there are enough ships and cruise lines to suit all tastes. I do not see the point of all ships being the same.

 

 

 

:):)Happy Cruising:):)

 

 

 

 

:cool:

 

 

Dai

[Kindlychap]

I'm confused. You are all discussing formal nights with reference to dinner jackets ("tux" to the Americans).

 

This isn't formal dress. It is informal.

 

Formal dress is white tie - and tails.

 

People also do travel by ship for the destination - look at the transatlantic crossings of RMS Queen Mary 2.

 

Seriously though, I love the ambiance of a ship that on a six night transatlantic expects four nights of "formal" (misnomer I know) and where almost everyone will wear a dinner jacket, and two nights of "informal" which the ship expects Gentlemen to wear a suit, or at least a jacket and tie. That ship, which will not be with us much longer, is RMS Queen Elizabeth 2. No-one changes back into casual clothing after dinner either.

 

I'd hate to go on one of these ships where formal is taken to mean not jeans. But I'm in the minority.

 

Each to his own.

 

Matthew

[Kudos2Fly]

I personally like doing the "Dress" up nights. We have done it on most of all our cruises. We didn't do it on one and that was fun too.

 

Just depends on how you feel. We enjoy seeing every one dressing up even the little ones..

 

The only time we have use our formal wear is on cruises and a couple of weddings and that is it.

 

On our lasted cruise I carried everything in a carry on luggage and back pack.. Sorry I can pack lite even with "formal" wear.

[Solo1959]

bychance and solo 1959

I agree that it should be about fun. For us dressing up for dinner two nights a week and to be with others dressed to the nines is part of that fun. That is the reason we don't eat in the dining room on formal nights if we don't feel like dressing, also the reason we don't cruise CCL or NCL. We enjoy seeing the Scots in their kilts, service people in their uniforms,the tuxes, dinner jackets, the ladies in the pretty dresses and fancy tops and skirts and slacks. Does it ruin our meal if you come to dinner in shorts and a tee shirt, no, but does it take something away from the evening, you betcha. I don't see why when a dress code is suggested and there are alternitive sites available for those who choose not to follow the suggestion, you would want to want to make my enjoyment of the evening less by the way you dress. Its my vacation too,I paid just like you did, and I chose a cruise line that has a dress code that I like. You have the same choice. imho Bill

 

Shhhh! Don't tell anyone, but I do intend to wear a jacket and tie for the formal night. Perhaps not as fancy as the white tie and tails mentioned earlier, but it does conform to the guidelines.

 

I do appreciate that some people like to dress up and actually enjoy it, I do appreciate that some people like to take photo's. But I do not understand this concept of dress-up being an old tradition of the sea. Only the very wealthy used to do it, they used to travel with clothes enough to last months in Europe, more than just a suitcase and a carry on for a week's cruise. Most cruisers, 3rd class, dressed according to the weather and the style of the day. In those days people wore jackets, today people don't. One is not more proper than the other.

 

The "tradition" is a creation of marketing or romance novels. Just my observation...

[okbowler]

Never really thought about dress up nights as an old timey tradition. We took our first cruise in the early 80s on the NCL Southward, it was for 7 nights and as I recall I wore a dark suit for 2 or 3 nights and a coat and tie for two nights. Every cruise since then has had a posted dress code which we have followed. As stated we enjoy the dress up nights,it has become our tradition, so we seek cruise lines that offer this. We live up in the mountains an don't have much occasion to dress up, my black suit has seen weddings, funerals and cruises and I probably will be wearing it when they slam the lid on me. I have no problem with casual dress, wear it probably more than 340 days a year, but do enjoy putting on the dog two or three nights on a cruise. It looks like that the way things are going this too will disappear or be available in a price range that we cannot afford. Time marches on.:) Bill

[agabbymama]

While as some of the posters have said, the old ocean liners were segregated by classes, and only the rich & famous dressed to the nines every night, that is what has been published, put in movies. It is part of the elegance of the ocean liner voyages of days gone by. When cruising first came into being, the old ocean liner voyages is what they copied, therefore the formal nights were part of the cruise ambiance, and has continued to be a tradition.

 

Today, cruising has become more affordable for everyone, including more and more families, just wanting a vacation to get away and relax, or be jam packed with theaters, rock climbing walls, wave riders, etc.

 

I prefer the luxury and elegance of the ocean liners, therefore I prefer HAL or Celebrity with their traditional "Formal" nights even though it's not white tails & tux. A black tux or even a suit is formal enough IMHO. I'm just a working gal and by no means part of the "rich & famous", but when I take a cruise, I can dress to the nines and feel that I am special and pampered for the week or ten days and maybe I am rich & famous for a little while.