Night of the Living Drunks: Our 2017 Halloween cruise aboard the Carnival Dream!

No, through Resort for a Day dot com. (I can't post the link here, against the rules. Lol)

Well duh, ok had one of those brain farts :cool::cool:

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017, Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands:

We slept in today, because we didn't have an excursion planned. We had a very healthy breakfast on Lido:

Thank the food gawds above that calories don't count on vacation, am I right?

After breakfast, we headed down to deck 0 to catch a tender. Being so late in the morning, we had to wait quite awhile as they unloaded a full tender back on the ship. Finally, we were able to get on:

We had a smooth ride over to the mainland:

Like I said earlier, we didn't have an excursion planned. But, I had a mission. If you'll recall from my last review, I love Big Black Dick, and it's all I cared about getting. Seriously, it's the best ever, and once you try it, you'll never go back to the regular stuff again. So, we headed out of the gate, and made a beeline for Big Black Dick ground zero, BlackBeard's. Oh, come to mama:

They have a really good deal where you get 4 bottles for $50, plus you get a free large rum cake. The rum cakes they sell are made and sold only in the Cayman Islands. And they are so much better than the Tortuga, which you can get basically anywhere:

And in case you're wondering, yes, I will be serving the Big Black Dick at Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow.

Once I had my Big Black Dick and I was satisfied, we did a little shopping at the port. Imagine my surprise when I saw an actual statue of my future self:

To be continued......

Happy Thanksgiving Watermelon Queen.

I was thinking of you when I was making my Red Rooster this morning.

It's a family favorite during the holidays. You make up a big container that you can put in the freezer and it makes an adult slushy. You just mix 4 cups of cranberry juice with 6 ounces of orange juice concentrate with 2 cups of vodka and put it in the freezer.

It is the perfect drink for those helliday gatherings....no that was not a typo!!

Sounds delish, you had me at 2 cups of vodka! :D And yes, Hellidays is accurate, cause Lawd my family. Lol Happy Thanksgiving!

Well duh, ok had one of those brain farts :cool::cool:

Lol, no problem, happens to me all the time. :D

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017, Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands Continued:

It was hot as hell in Grand Cayman, so after doing a little more shopping, we decided to head back to the ship. I snapped some pics from the tender:

The Conquest was in port with us:

Some kind of pirate ship excursion. Kind of a small boat, but if they serve alcohol, I'd be down to try it:

Getting closer to our house:

To be continued, as the next set of pictures all go together...

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017, Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands:

We slept in today, because we didn't have an excursion planned. We had a very healthy breakfast on Lido:

 

 

Thank the food gawds above that calories don't count on vacation, am I right?

 

After breakfast, we headed down to deck 0 to catch a tender. Being so late in the morning, we had to wait quite awhile as they unloaded a full tender back on the ship. Finally, we were able to get on:

 

 

We had a smooth ride over to the mainland:

 

Like I said earlier, we didn't have an excursion planned. But, I had a mission. If you'll recall from my last review, I love Big Black Dick, and it's all I cared about getting. Seriously, it's the best ever, and once you try it, you'll never go back to the regular stuff again. So, we headed out of the gate, and made a beeline for Big Black Dick ground zero, BlackBeard's. Oh, come to mama:

 

 

They have a really good deal where you get 4 bottles for $50, plus you get a free large rum cake. The rum cakes they sell are made and sold only in the Cayman Islands. And they are so much better than the Tortuga, which you can get basically anywhere:

 

 

And in case you're wondering, yes, I will be serving the Big Black Dick at Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow.

 

Once I had my Big Black Dick and I was satisfied, we did a little shopping at the port. Imagine my surprise when I saw an actual statue of my future self:

 

 

To be continued......

 

 

Omg, this sound dirtier than I mean it to..... and it’s a serious inquiry.... what does big black dick taste like? Is it a lower alcohol rum, like coconut rum? Do you mix it with anything? Favorite flavors?

Loving your review. Very entertaining and informative

Thanks!

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017, Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands Continued:

We made it safely back to the ship. When we got back onboard, we decided to do some laundry. (Remember, we're still 2 cruises away from being Super Upper Crust Highly Important Platinum Cruisers, so we still have to do our own laundry.) We grabbed our laundry from our room and headed to the laundry room on deck 2. I know, these pics are super exciting, but maybe they'll be helpful to other lowly Blue, Red, and Gold card holders. Washer:

Dryer:

This is where you pay for the washers and dryers via your Sail and Sign card:

You can purchase detergent and dryer sheets from this machine, but I highly recommend doing what we do. Go to your local Wal-Mart, and find the travel size product section. They sell packets of Tide for $1. And throw some dryer sheets that you already have at home into a Ziploc baggie. That will save you some $$$ that could go toward alcohol. Or you can do what the guy who was in there ironing some clothes did. He told us that he helped himself to some detergent that was under the sink, and asked that we please don't tell. We're not that gangsta to be stealing bootleg detergent, but do your thing, my man:

We threw our clothes into the wash, and headed back down the hall to our room. Now, I wanna keep this review light and funny, so I'm only going to briefly touch on this. We dozed off in our room, slept through the alarm we set, and it made us a little late (MAYBE 10 minutes after our laundry was done) getting back to the laundry room. When we woke up and rushed back down there, someone had taken our laundry out and set it on the dirty metal table. Whoever you are, just know that you better feel damn good and hell well that I didn't walk in and catch you taking my draws out the washer. It would NOT have been pretty. We've gone to the laundry room many times to find washers that had finished their cycle, but still had clothes in them. We just did what anyone who is not a Grade A Dick does: we came back later. Whoever you are, I cussed you out up one way and down the other, and I hope with all my might that whatever you had for dinner that night gave you explosive diarrhea.

To be continued.....

...

We threw our clothes into the wash, and headed back down the hall to our room. Now, I wanna keep this review light and funny, so I'm only going to briefly touch on this. We dozed off in our room, slept through the alarm we set, and it made us a little late (MAYBE 10 minutes after our laundry was done) getting back to the laundry room. When we woke up and rushed back down there, someone had taken our laundry out and set it on the dirty metal table. Whoever you are, just know that you better feel damn good and hell well that I didn't walk in and catch you taking my draws out the washer. It would NOT have been pretty. We've gone to the laundry room many times to find washers that had finished their cycle, but still had clothes in them. We just did what anyone who is not a Grade A Dick does: we came back later. Whoever you are, I cussed you out up one way and down the other, and I hope with all my might that whatever you had for dinner that night gave you explosive diarrhea.

 

To be continued.....

I probably would have left a “thoughtful” note for them on the washing machine [emoji51]

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

Omg, this sound dirtier than I mean it to..... and it’s a serious inquiry.... what does big black dick taste like? Is it a lower alcohol rum, like coconut rum? Do you mix it with anything? Favorite flavors?

 

Loving your review. Very entertaining and informative

Thanks!

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

Big Black Dick is delicious. ;p There are several different flavors. This time, we bought Dark Chocolate, Vanilla, and White Chocolate. They are all 60 proof. Sometimes we mix it with other liqueurs, sometimes it's on the rocks. It's versatile! Thanks for reading!

I probably would have left a “thoughtful” note for them on the washing machine [emoji51]

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

C had to spend a good 30 minutes calming me down. I was HOT. Lol But that's a good idea. From now on, I'm gonna travel with Post-It notes. :D

Big Black Dick is delicious. ;p There are several different flavors. This time, we bought Dark Chocolate, Vanilla, and White Chocolate. They are all 60 proof. Sometimes we mix it with other liqueurs, sometimes it's on the rocks. It's versatile! Thanks for reading!

Thanks

Our Panama Canal cruise stops in Grand Cayman. Will need to check that out!!

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

C had to spend a good 30 minutes calming me down. I was HOT. Lol But that's a good idea. From now on, I'm gonna travel with Post-It notes. :D

Post it’s are a must for us, but I probably would have gone to guest services, asked for paper, pen and a piece of tape [emoji23] . Taking my clothes out would have made me upset too. In college we had a rule, if you took clothes out of the dryer, you had to fold them. I never wanted to fold someone else’s undies.... so I waited patiently.

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017, Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands Continued:

After I had calmed down from Laundry-Gate, we decided to head up to Lido to get some food. You're not going to believe this, but we had a Guy's burger:

We also decided we wanted to share a wiener:

I didn't care for this wiener, so I let C finish it off by himself. After we ate, we decided to roam the ship a little bit. I attempted another artsy pic, capturing the Conquest in the reflection of this window:

We eventually ended up back in our room to get ready for the evening. We were super confused, because this was waiting for C, whose birthday is in February....

We found ourselves cutting through the dining room as we made our way to the Atrium. It was elegant night, so the tablecloths were out:

A closer look at the tablecloths, for all of those of you who choose to write to John Heald and complain that there are no tablecloths for you to pleasure yourselves to anymore:

Thanks

Our Panama Canal cruise stops in Grand Cayman. Will need to check that out!!

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

Have a great cruise!

Post it’s are a must for us, but I probably would have gone to guest services, asked for paper, pen and a piece of tape [emoji23] . Taking my clothes out would have made me upset too. In college we had a rule, if you took clothes out of the dryer, you had to fold them. I never wanted to fold someone else’s undies.... so I waited patiently.

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

I wish I would have thought to leave a note, seriously! I was so mad, I wasn't thinking clearly. Lol

Thursday, November 2nd, 2017, Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands Continued:

I apologize for the lack of pictures and content in this post. I should have finished out GC in the last post, because I don't have any more pics from this day.

There wasn't much going on, so we made our way to the casino bar. We chatted with some other passengers there. We again bar hopped back and forth. And again, we were bored. We decided to go listen to karaoke, but everyone was singing boring, slow ballads. We probably heard "Killing Me Softly" 289 times on this cruise, between the musicians and other passengers. There's so much irony there, considering how terrible the music was all week. We hung out at the piano bar, reaching for that daily goal. Eventually, we made our way back to the room. That night, I dreamed that I found out who took my draws out the washer, and C and I threw them overboard.

Side note--Happy Thanksgiving! My family (finally!) left, and fortunately they took our children with them for the weekend. So C and I are watching an upscale culinary show (Guy's Grocery Games), detoxing from all the food and booze, (by drinking vodka and diet coke), and just being thankful that everyone is gone. The day went well, we only had to call the police once when my mom and brother-in-law had a dispute during a game of Pictionary. Topics of conversation at the table included Jefferey Dahmer, urinary catheters, and how cows regurgitate their food and swallow it again. (I truly wish I was making this part up.) But, I guess it's still better than politics and religion. I hope you all had a great day, full of food, alcohol, and people you actually like!

Stay tuned for our day in Cozumel!

I probably would have left a “thoughtful” note for them on the washing machine [emoji51]

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

That’s not going to change their behavior...just take their clothes out and leave them on the floor.

Loving your review! Just curious where the shop is for the BBD rum. Was it right in or outside the port area? Going on the Dream in January and will be my 3rd time in GC. We'll be going to 7 Mile Beach (Public area by Calico Jacks) for Seymour's Jerk (best chicken stand ever!) and then hopefully trying to get/try a few BBD rums and and BBD rum cakes. Also, did they do any tastings where you went? Would like to sample a few before we buy. Thanks for your help and looking forward to the rest of the review!

Thanks for taking the time to share your trip report! Loving your humor - a good laugh is much appreciated after the holiday stress. :cool:

Megan

Loving your review! Just curious where the shop is for the BBD rum. Was it right in or outside the port area? Going on the Dream in January and will be my 3rd time in GC. We'll be going to 7 Mile Beach (Public area by Calico Jacks) for Seymour's Jerk (best chicken stand ever!) and then hopefully trying to get/try a few BBD rums and and BBD rum cakes. Also, did they do any tastings where you went? Would like to sample a few before we buy. Thanks for your help and looking forward to the rest of the review!

When you get to the port shopping area, stay to your right and go through the gate on the right. It's right across the street. And yes, they give samples. Thanks for reading, and have a great cruise!

Thanks for taking the time to share your trip report! Loving your humor - a good laugh is much appreciated after the holiday stress. :cool:

 

Megan

You're welcome! Thanks for reading!

Friday, November 3rd, 2017, Cozumel, Mexico:

We slept in pretty late (for us) and had breakfast on Lido around 10:30. We've been to Cozumel eleventy hundred times, and we didn't have an excursion planned. (But if you're looking for a recommendation, Nachi Cocom and the Salsa and Salsa tour are both fantastic.) I did need to get off the ship to make a purchase (more on that later), but we decided to go ahead and get our ship pics for this review while most everyone was in port. So, ladies and gentlemen, get comfy, grab a drink, and join me for a tour of the beautiful Carnival Dream, starting on Lido. Here's the Tandoor: (We never ate there, so I can't comment on the food.)

The view of Cozumel from Lido:

Lots of ships in port today. I think that shady bitch Conquest is following us. I'm gonna keep an eye on my jewelry and valuables. (A $5 choker from Claire's, my vibrator, and my favorite t-shirt that says "Dirty Girl" on the front.) The Splendor was with us, and also Royal Caribbean Something of the Seas:

The aft pool:

The pizzeria: (We found the pizza to be different this time, and not as good as it was when we were on the Dream last year.)

To be continued.....

Friday, November 3rd, 2017, Cozumel, Mexico Continued:

Continuing our tour of the Dream. Looking down onto an empty Lido deck:

Looking across to the Waterworks area:

Mini golf course on deck 12, and little tail action:

More of the golf course:

Some waterslide porn:

To be continued......

Friday, November 3rd, 2017, Cozumel, Mexico Continued:

Let's continue our tour of the Dream by checking out the adults only Serenity deck: (Put your damn top back on, it's not THAT kind of adult deck. No, I'm not talking to you readers, I'm quoting what C said to me.)

These clamshell beds are where you and your partner can have a certain kind of sexy time late at night after you've hit your goal and most of the other passengers are already in bed. That's what a friend told me, anyway:

Friday, November 3rd, 2017, Cozumel, Mexico Continued:

Let's wrap up our tour of Serenity:

A closer look at the tails on the Conquest and Splendor. The Splendor's tail looks a lot like me at the end of a long night of drinking: worn, faded and in need of a touch up:

To be continued....