How do you deal with rude people?

[grab007]

Very interesting discussion. It transcends cruising but I'll stay in that realm. My wife has MS as well and cannot walk at all. We cruise every year and deal with all of this all of the time. But the answer lies in the bigger picture. We're on vacation and will not EVER allow rude people to ruin it! The crowds subside, we wait a few more minutes. We're just greatful for being together cruising! A happy, positive attitude is contagious and we find many folks, indeed most folks are very helpful when greeted with a smile. Life is short and the cruise is even shorter. Don't let ignorant behavior ruin it. Hope this helps.

[gordito]

Very interesting discussion. It transcends cruising but I'll stay in that realm. My wife has MS as well and cannot walk at all. We cruise every year and deal with all of this all of the time. But the answer lies in the bigger picture. We're on vacation and will not EVER allow rude people to ruin it! The crowds subside, we wait a few more minutes. We're just greatful for being together cruising! A happy, positive attitude is contagious and we find many folks, indeed most folks are very helpful when greeted with a smile. Life is short and the cruise is even shorter. Don't let ignorant behavior ruin it. Hope this helps.

 

Wonderful position ... having been on both sides of the situation (cruising since 1971, with power wheel chair since 2010) can only agree!

We are on vacation and a GREAT SMILE lets the medicine goes down!

 

But have to agree, now that I am using the power chair, I've noticed proportionally MORE rudeness. Sorry for the world we live on!

 

Herb :confused:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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[TriciaR1970]

We learned quickly when theater lets out to either get on right away or go to the other end of the ship for an elevator. People will shove right in front of a wheelchair to take the elevator, and then go up only one level when they could quite easily take the stairs. When traveling with my husband who has MS and is in a power chair it can be really frustrating. After experiencing this many times on our first cruise when I went with my sister the next year we both took the stairs everywhere as we would NOT be part of that rude crowd.

[momof3cruisers]

Very interesting discussion. It transcends cruising but I'll stay in that realm. My wife has MS as well and cannot walk at all. We cruise every year and deal with all of this all of the time. But the answer lies in the bigger picture. We're on vacation and will not EVER allow rude people to ruin it! The crowds subside, we wait a few more minutes. We're just greatful for being together cruising! A happy, positive attitude is contagious and we find many folks, indeed most folks are very helpful when greeted with a smile. Life is short and the cruise is even shorter. Don't let ignorant behavior ruin it. Hope this helps.

 

I have MS as well but can walk, just not long distances due to both pain and fatigue. And for the person who asks people why they use a disabled stall in the restroom....I may not LOOK disabled to you, but I'd really rather not get stuck on the lower toilets, thanks.:rolleyes:

 

I too try to just let it slide off of me. We were at WDW last week and of all the many many people who cut me off or stopped dead in front of my scooter for no apparent reason, only one really got to me. We were at the entrance to a stage show and the standard line had those little gates that go around in a circle, so an employee came over and opened the h/c gate for me. There was NO line, but as soon as she opened it, a couple of people cut quickly in front of me and went through it. We both just were so taken aback. I started to move again and this couple comes up and started to cut around me. Still NO line for the regular entrance...at that point I just said, "Oh, you have GOT to be kidding me!" they stopped and gave me a dirty look at which pt the employee told them there were six other entrances available to them and she had opened the gate for me.

 

They were still ticked. My children however were thrilled that I finally spoke up. It upsets them more than it does me as they just perceive it as people being mean to their mom. I know it's often just out of people not paying attention. Life is too short for me to get too upset about it all.

[sparky-elpaso]

I have MS as well but can walk, just not long distances due to both pain and fatigue. And for the person who asks people why they use a disabled stall in the restroom....I may not LOOK disabled to you, but I'd really rather not get stuck on the lower toilets, thanks.:rolleyes:

 

I too try to just let it slide off of me. We were at WDW last week and of all the many many people who cut me off or stopped dead in front of my scooter for no apparent reason, only one really got to me. We were at the entrance to a stage show and the standard line had those little gates that go around in a circle, so an employee came over and opened the h/c gate for me. There was NO line, but as soon as she opened it, a couple of people cut quickly in front of me and went through it. We both just were so taken aback. I started to move again and this couple comes up and started to cut around me. Still NO line for the regular entrance...at that point I just said, "Oh, you have GOT to be kidding me!" they stopped and gave me a dirty look at which pt the employee told them there were six other entrances available to them and she had opened the gate for me.

 

They were still ticked. My children however were thrilled that I finally spoke up. It upsets them more than it does me as they just perceive it as people being mean to their mom. I know it's often just out of people not paying attention. Life is too short for me to get too upset about it all.

 

Just one of those situations that shows you "can't fix stupid". :rolleyes:

 

I'm beginning to think I may be in the minority - I actually watch where I'm going so I can't say I've ever "tripped" over someone in a wheelchair or scooter. And DH and I always let someone go ahead at elevators - and we'll run interference if others try to push by. I used to ride the bus to and from work and I've had to physically lean back to prevent people from moving forward when the bus driver was trying to lower the lift or ramp for someone in a wheelchair.

[ducklite]

I find it hard sometimes not to hit people with the scooter. (rentals at Disney til now) People have no clue that many scooters do not stop on a dime the way a person can, and don't allow distance/time when leaping in front of you, usually dragging or chasing a toddler or two.

The rec.arts.disney.parks usenet group has discussed this quite a bit over the years. The main conclusion, which I agree with, is that people do not "see" you. You are not at eye level and so you don't register for them. They walk in front of you, cut you off as you are driving etc. cause they don't notice you. I notice them...at least I notice the sea of butts around me at my eye level. sigh.

I did have a problem at Disney the last time though no one said anything to me. The buses must load me and my scooter before anyone gets on the bus. We stayed at Animal Kingdom Lodge and a zillion toddlers (when is it coming, when is it coming?) sit in the heat waiting for the bus and when it comes they can't let the kids on the bus til I am loaded first. CRABBY parents. A day of the glares and we moved to a hotel on the monorail.

 

On the flip side, I've been hit several times from behind by scooters and wheelchairs while I was walking at a consistent pace because the person operating the scooter (or pushing the wheelchair) wasn't paying attention. I had cut heels from the wheelchair and have been bruised by scooters. They should have a one strike rule where anyone who causes injury to another through their negligence gets ejected.

[ducklite]

I have MS as well but can walk, just not long distances due to both pain and fatigue. And for the person who asks people why they use a disabled stall in the restroom....I may not LOOK disabled to you, but I'd really rather not get stuck on the lower toilets, thanks.:rolleyes:

 

I too try to just let it slide off of me. We were at WDW last week and of all the many many people who cut me off or stopped dead in front of my scooter for no apparent reason, only one really got to me. We were at the entrance to a stage show and the standard line had those little gates that go around in a circle, so an employee came over and opened the h/c gate for me. There was NO line, but as soon as she opened it, a couple of people cut quickly in front of me and went through it. We both just were so taken aback. I started to move again and this couple comes up and started to cut around me. Still NO line for the regular entrance...at that point I just said, "Oh, you have GOT to be kidding me!" they stopped and gave me a dirty look at which pt the employee told them there were six other entrances available to them and she had opened the gate for me.

 

They were still ticked. My children however were thrilled that I finally spoke up. It upsets them more than it does me as they just perceive it as people being mean to their mom. I know it's often just out of people not paying attention. Life is too short for me to get too upset about it all.

 

I have a friend who has an ostomy and uses the handicapped stall because she needs a little more room and often direct access to a sink. She certainly doesn't look like she would need that stall, but has as much of a need as any other. She's had numerous times where she's gotten dirty looks. She just smiles and tells them to have a nice day as she walks past.

[sherilyn70]

They should have a one strike rule where anyone who causes injury to another through their negligence gets ejected.

 

So we're going to start kicking off all the drunks that bump into us and the families with kids that aren't being watched that run into people or cut them off too? :) I'm all for that rule. However accidents happen, as long as the person appologizes (and means it) I have no issues with it unless they were being truley reckless at the cost of others.

[sherilyn70]

I have a friend who has an ostomy and uses the handicapped stall because she needs a little more room and often direct access to a sink. She certainly doesn't look like she would need that stall, but has as much of a need as any other. She's had numerous times where she's gotten dirty looks. She just smiles and tells them to have a nice day as she walks past.

 

Wow, something I actually agree with you on, lol. I understand that we can't see all illnesses (especially things such as degerative disorders that may not show when walking) and so I try to never judge. However when the person comes out of that stall and appologizes for using it then I know they were abusing it. It's the people that jump out of large trucks and SUVs (the kind that sit up high off the ground) wearing flip flops and then run off to catch up with their grandkids after having taken a handicap parking spot that bother me most. :p

[Gunner22aa]

I deal with them in two different ways. If they are rude to me I just ignore them. If however I hear someone being rude to the staff they get the best oratory I can muster at the moment. Some of them I have actually been quite proud of.

[ducklite]

So we're going to start kicking off all the drunks that bump into us and the families with kids that aren't being watched that run into people or cut them off too? :) I'm all for that rule. However accidents happen, as long as the person appologizes (and means it) I have no issues with it unless they were being truley reckless at the cost of others.

 

Drunks yes, kids it depends.

 

It's not an accident when someone is riding a scooter or pushing a wheelchair too fast and "rear ends" someone, it's negligence. Like I said, I ended up with bloody heels after being hit by a wheelchair being used as a battering ram. The person in it and the person pushing it should have been ejected for assaulting me with their careless behavior.

Edited October 19, 2013 by ducklite

[ducklite]

Wow, something I actually agree with you on, lol. I understand that we can't see all illnesses (especially things such as degerative disorders that may not show when walking) and so I try to never judge. However when the person comes out of that stall and appologizes for using it then I know they were abusing it. It's the people that jump out of large trucks and SUVs (the kind that sit up high off the ground) wearing flip flops and then run off to catch up with their grandkids after having taken a handicap parking spot that bother me most. :p

 

I've seen my friend apologize. She isn't apologizing for using the stall, but rather because the other person had to wait. Common courtesy, nothing more, nothing less. If the person waiting is so bitter as to think otherwise, that is their problem.

[grab007]

To Ducklite: Very nice. Negligence? Really? At least you and your bloody heals can walk away. Have you ever thought what it would be like to not be able to walk or stand? You've never bumped into someone by accident? Well I guess cruising is only for you perfect folks. Next time we'll just stay home.

[ducklite]

To Ducklite: Very nice. Negligence? Really? At least you and your bloody heals can walk away. Have you ever thought what it would be like to not be able to walk or stand? You've never bumped into someone by accident? Well I guess cruising is only for you perfect folks. Next time we'll just stay home.

 

I spent six months in a wheelchair after having a tumor removed from my spine, and managed to do so without hitting anyone. Now what were you saying?

[Lionesss]

I have learned to bite my tongue and keep my mouth quiet when I encounter someone for whatever reason who does something stupid and is rude.

I have done some 'rude' stuff in my days and have over the years learned to be more tolerant and respectful of others.

So when someone is pushing it to the limit I usually walk away if I can. I try to say to myself they have the problems not me.

If it is a person in a Wheel chair or scooter and are running into people or blocking paths I wait or softly say "excuse me please." I just am glad I have the ability to get around on my own.

Patience is a virtue and I work at it every day.

I had one goof up on the Allure where I spoke out of place to someone and never want to do that again, I saw after the fact how mean I was....I did apologize, and was grateful it was accepted.

Some people just do not know what they are doing and how they are acting.

Sea Ya

[sabookkeeper]

I have just read through this entire thread. I have just bought a scooter to bring on my cruise in February. I am very fortunate that I do not need it on board, at least at this point I don't, so I won't have to deal with rude people trying to get on an elevator. My DH does not have patience with people pushing in front when I can walk so I would hate to see him if this happens when I'm in my scooter. I agree that people do judge by how we look. If someone looks at my they will not see my scoliosis and degenerative disk disease and might assume that I am one of "those people" who don't really need a scooter. I guess we all have to be more aware of our surroundings whether we are in a wheelchair/scooter or one of the lucky ones who can actually walk.

[OldinJersey]

Please bring your scooter on the cruise if at all possible. Even a small ship requires a LOT of walking to get from room to food to pool to entertainment. I need a scooter as much for that as any part of the trip. We have cruised on princess, Hal and celebrity without major problems with others, and been at Walt disney world a number of times since those are the only two things we know offer full accommodation for scooter users. At elevators my husband stands in from of the door and when it arrives stands in entry and asks people to make room, or let me in first/last. People are mainly great, often families offer to wait for next elevator. My scooter is small and has quick turn radius. I rented a second scooter at wdw last month since my scooter is no longer comfortable enough long distance outside and I bet I annoyed folks. Bigger scooter, increased vision issues..people were forgiving. My best guess is we are below normal vision scanning and people do not unconsciously move around or stop when we are nearby. They stop dead in front, weave in front, pull toddlers into my path. At times I suspect people think it ok to force us to wait at elevators etc because we are sitting and they are tired. Our first full scooter use visit to disney my husband was made to feel so guilty (glaring parents) that scooter users are loaded first (unloaded last) on buses he moved us to monorail hotel. He got over that soon enough!

[ducklite]

Please bring your scooter on the cruise if at all possible. Even a small ship requires a LOT of walking to get from room to food to pool to entertainment. I need a scooter as much for that as any part of the trip. We have cruised on princess, Hal and celebrity without major problems with others, and been at Walt disney world a number of times since those are the only two things we know offer full accommodation for scooter users. At elevators my husband stands in from of the door and when it arrives stands in entry and asks people to make room, or let me in first/last. People are mainly great, often families offer to wait for next elevator. My scooter is small and has quick turn radius. I rented a second scooter at wdw last month since my scooter is no longer comfortable enough long distance outside and I bet I annoyed folks. Bigger scooter, increased vision issues..people were forgiving. My best guess is we are below normal vision scanning and people do not unconsciously move around or stop when we are nearby. They stop dead in front, weave in front, pull toddlers into my path. At times I suspect people think it ok to force us to wait at elevators etc because we are sitting and they are tired. Our first full scooter use visit to disney my husband was made to feel so guilty (glaring parents) that scooter users are loaded first (unloaded last) on buses he moved us to monorail hotel. He got over that soon enough!

 

IMHO there should be lines with stantions and rope that can accommodate scooters, and scooter/wheelchair users should wait their turn like everyone else for elevators, buses, etc. If there is no room for the scooter and it is next in line, no one gets on at that stop. They should not automatically get priority boarding. The only exception is children on Wish trips.

[SigalTchelet]

IMHO there should be lines with stantions and rope that can accommodate scooters, and scooter/wheelchair users should wait their turn like everyone else for elevators, buses, etc. If there is no room for the scooter and it is next in line, no one gets on at that stop. They should not automatically get priority boarding. The only exception is children on Wish trips.

Seriously? The reason we are loaded first is it is easier for the bus drivers They need the space for us to get situated. I sure hope you are not a troll. I would MUCH rather have the ability to walk on my own then have ti use my wheelchair.I sure hoe you are never in the position to have to use a wheelchair or scooter!!!!

[TriciaR1970]

Really getting annoyed with the rude people or mostly person in this thread. Sheesh, better hope you don't end up in a wheelchair when the kharma train runs you over.

 

Sent from my VS920 4G using Tapatalk

[ducklite]

Seriously? The reason we are loaded first is it is easier for the bus drivers They need the space for us to get situated. I sure hope you are not a troll. I would MUCH rather have the ability to walk on my own then have ti use my wheelchair.I sure hoe you are never in the position to have to use a wheelchair or scooter!!!!

 

This is about to change with a new product called Quantum. The driver will deploy the ramp at the front door and the wheelchair user will roll in, position themselves in specially designated space behind the driver, and the system will automatically clamp them in. The driver will never leave their seat. If the bus is full, the wheelchair will have to wait for the next bus, the driver will not ask people to get off to allow the wheelchair in. They will only ask people to move to empty space if there is any.

 

As I mentioned earlier, I was in a wheelchair for six months after surgery. I never expected to go ahead of a line, I waited my turn.

 

 

Autocorrect responsible for most typos...

[sherilyn70]

I sure hope you are not a troll. I would MUCH rather have the ability to walk on my own then have ti use my wheelchair.I sure hoe you are never in the position to have to use a wheelchair or scooter!!!!

 

No, she is not a troll. She is a high society princess who thinks that she is better than many others. This is her normal attitude. She has little compassion for strangers around her and tends to stick to only the higher end cruise lines. She or her husband has some sort of medical background if I recall so she feels she is an expert on anything medical as well. Just ignore her, she is not the normal. :)

[ducklite]

No, she is not a troll. She is a high society princess who thinks that she is better than many others. This is her normal attitude. She has little compassion for strangers around her and tends to stick to only the higher end cruise lines. She or her husband has some sort of medical background if I recall so she feels she is an expert on anything medical as well. Just ignore her, she is not the normal. :)

 

Not true at all. I have a great deal of compassion, I just don't believe that people who feel they are "entitled" to special treatment are the ones who deserve it.

 

As far as which cruise lines I sail, what on earth does that have to do with anything? I know what type of environment I enjoy, and select my cruise accordingly. It would be stupid to choose a cruise where I don't care for the ports, the ship, or the majority of on board activities, and the menus don't appeal. I'm not a "high society princess." I work for a living just like most other people.

Edited October 22, 2013 by ducklite

[fair-winds39]

Yikes!!!

 

I too have a scooter and I'm bringing it on a cruise for the first time in 2014. I can move around in our cabin with my cane, and I'm hoping to use my cane and DH's arm when we go to the dining room. I'll use the scooter to get around on the ship during the day. MS plays havoc with my mobility. I will say that I've never experienced anyone jumping in front of me while waiting for an elevator, or anything like that. I have had a few people just about walk into me though, as they were busy looking down at their cell phone, or I am invisible to some folks, but thankfully, there has never been a collision.

 

When we use elevators in other venues, if it's packed with people, of course we just wait for another elevator. If there are a few people in the elevator, they usually step to either side and I drive in frontward, and back out when exiting. I also think some people who need a scooter, may not receive proper training on how to operate the device, and the scooter or power chair gets away from them, thus colliding with folks accidentally.

 

I appreciate that I can bring my scooter with me, and I so wish I didn't need it, but unfortunately I do. I think too, that very soon the cruise lines and other venues with crowds will most likely create regulations that require some sort of medical documentation indicating that we indeed need these aids.

[sherilyn70]

I appreciate that I can bring my scooter with me, and I so wish I didn't need it, but unfortunately I do. I think too, that very soon the cruise lines and other venues with crowds will most likely create regulations that require some sort of medical documentation indicating that we indeed need these aids.

 

Since my oncologist wrote the prescription for the scooter I don't think that's going to be an issue for me... so I have no issues with providing them with any medical documentation they would like.